I don't know why my boss suddenly required that I work on Friday nights and Saturdays... but I have to. I promise it won't last too long."

"Why do I have two cell phones? Well, one is for friends and one is for family, close friends, and business."

"Why do I spend so much time with Michelle? Baby, that is my best (female) friend. I am not having sex with her. I promise."

"I know it's late, but it's Friday. I just want some company. I am not necessarily just trying to get in your pants."

"Baby, I don't know who that woman is who keeps calling my phone. I met her at a party once, but beyond that, I've never talked with her."

"Baby, of course I'm going to marry you someday. I know we've been dating for six years, but I am going to propose to you soon."

I can't live without you
No one can not live without anyone. They did fine before they met you. Period.

I don't care about my dick size.
I care about it a lot! I have a very small ego, I will cry over it, over and over again.

You look lovely as usual
I have to say that even if you don't, otherwise I'll end up in useless fights 365 days later where you'll recall this very incident. It's better to lie.

''Babe, I'll call you back in two minutes'',
Two minutes mean an eternity, he never said.

My battery died. I couldn’t call you.
LOL, thanks to the ‘Mobile is switched off’ savior line.
Ratio between actual mobile getting switched off : Battery dead is 10:1.

We can always do it another time.”
I am never doing it, ever.

Yes, the red dress is better than the blue one.”
I am saying this because I want to go home.

above all,

I AM DIFFERENT, I AM NOT LIKE OTHER GUYS.

feel free to add yours

brb