Happy New Month to everyone.
so i've been dating this guy for almost 2yrs now...
earlier in the relationship, he made his intentions known - that he would get married to me. i'm in my early 20s' and he's past 30. i still school, but he's way ahead of me.. trying to build his life too.
thing is, the past few weeks he's just been talkin about settling down and promised to let me finish school even when we're married. sayin he's already getting too old for marriage. i still have less than two years to finish, and i want to graduate before marriage. at least my family wants that too. i'm scared that he'd be unable to wait until then.
i just need an advise

If you must get married to him now give him the condition that you guys will start having kids once you're done with your studies.......if he refuse wait until you're done with your studies..... ladies who get married while in school suffer most Times......back then in school the once that were my course mate suffer...... give him these conditions

Follow your heart Aunty so that you won't come here tomorrow and say it was Chairman FortifiedCity that made me lose my man and opportunity

Oga should chill for you to graduate na
Less than two years isn't such a long time.

You guys can do it gradually.
Maybe introduction sometime next year, traditional marriage too. Then leave white wedding till after you write your final exams.

That's if you're sure he's the one and the love/feelings are mutual.

My dear, the truth of the matter is, you don't see this guy as your prince charming 'cause if you did, the moment he mentioned marriage you'd have accepted. Abi if Dangote's son comes to marry you, would you ask him to wait for you to finish school?.

ur english self

I can imagine how u look

marriage is not by force, the timing has to favor both of una, if he wants to force u, let him go biko

Benita27:
My dear, the truth of the matter is, you don't see this guy as your prince charming 'cause if you did, the moment he mentioned marriage you'd have accepted. Abi if Dangote's son comes to marry you, would you ask him to wait for you to finish school?.

♤ °•hahaha°•°

♤ ßitter truth

And what is wrong with getting married while you are still in school?

...to be honest, for a guy that is above 30 in age, how do you want him to wait for you for the next 2 years?

Put yourself in his shoes too!

If you were above 30 as a lady and you meet a guy and he says you should wait for the next 2 years before marriage, how would you feel?

Except you are not really into him....

Ab025:
And what is wrong with getting married while you are still in school?

...to be honest, for a guy that is above 30 in age, how do you want him to wait for you for the next 2 years?

Put yourself in his shoes too!

If you were above 30 as a lady and you meet a guy and he says you should wait for the next 2 years before marriage, how would you feel?

Except you are not really into him....

30-35 years is the ideal age most men marry.
Except the few that get married pretty early or late even.
That's not same for the ladies y'know

Benita27:
My dear, the truth of the matter is, you don't see this guy as your prince charming 'cause if you did, the moment he mentioned marriage you'd have accepted. Abi if Dangote's son comes to marry you, would you ask him to wait for you to finish school?.

I love this person alot, but my family wont hear of it.

Keep waiting o, wait till after Nysc self but don't forget that the blessings you take for granted are the prayer points of others.

Maybe you are not really ready to settle down with him.

Do as you please, na your life

RoyalBlak007:



♤ °•hahaha°•°

♤ ßitter truth

She should just let the guy go. All these delay tactics we understand them. The guy is still trying to build his life so we understand her reasons for not wanting to perfectly. She could get married to him if she loves him enough to want to. After all, family planning will help while she completes her education if she's battling with the fear of conceiving while in school which may slow her academic pursuit.

If you know you can cope with marriage and schooling and if you fiance will be the understanding type that will know that you are still a student then you can go for it.
And secondly I won't advise you to get pregnant while shooling cos it's not going to be easy
The ball it's in your court
So please do whatever you so desire
If you want to get married do it willingly and not cos you are pushed to

U said u have less dan 2yrs..
If he cant chill for that long then he is not for u.
He is 30 now and would be 31 or 32 then.. not much difference if u ask me.

Unless he is scared of something else(maybe he is suspecting u ar seeing some1 else who might snatch u awys from him)

Otherwise i d suggest u finish ur school first

Benita27:
She should just let the guy go. All these delay tactics we understand them. The guy is still trying to build his life so we understand her reasons for not wanting to perfectly. She could get married to him if she loves him enough to want to. After all, family planning will help while she completes her education if she's battling with the fear of conceiving while in school which may slow her academic pursuit.

he's built himself already.
i think i should rephrase that...
my family believes i should finish first, at least we've had one or two bad experiences before

Edrick:

I love this person alot, but my family wont hear of it.

This shouldn't be about your family to a large extent.
It's about you and what you want.
What would be their reason for saying no? You're too young for marriage?
Or what??

Truth is atimes we nurse fears over nothing. You might be scared they wouldn't give their approval but you've not even made the attempt.
Only on few occasions you'll see the ladies family give their support to marrying off their daughter at first try. They'll always come up with ridiculous reasons not because they don't want to give their daughter out but cos they're only trying to take caution. And in majority of the cases, a little cajoling and explanation does the trick.

If the Man is responsible and has proven beyond reasonable doubt that he can take care of you and cherish you, then why not.

Edrick:

I love this person alot, but my family wont hear of it.

Have you discussed him with your family?. You're already is school so it's easier for you to marry and still have your whole life ahead than when you're probably still seeking for admission. Now you're sure that no matter what, you'd finish while still in your husband's house. Usually, when you receive proposal you love the guy enough, you discuss him with your family to get their opinion.

Now wey u don see husband u no go rush, Isoryt

Benita27:
She should just let the guy go. All these delay tactics we understand them. The guy is still trying to build his life so we understand her reasons for not wanting to perfectly. She could get married to him if she loves him enough to want to. After all, family planning will help while she completes her education if she's battling with the fear of conceiving while in school which may slow her academic pursuit.

♤ Her family is making her decision for her

♤"My family believes I should finish first" . I guess it's up to the "Oga" now, if he's gonna wait for two years

Edrick:

he's built himself already.
i think i should rephrase that...
my family believes i should finish first, at least we've had one or two bad experiences before

Luckygurl:


This shouldn't be about your family to a large extent.
It's about you and what you want.
What would be their reason for saying no? You're too young for marriage?
Or what??

Truth is atimes we nurse fears over nothing. You might be scared they wouldn't give their approval but you've not even made the attempt.
Only on few occasions you'll see the ladies family give their support to marrying off their daughter at first try. They'll always come up with ridiculous reasons not because they don't want to give their daughter out but cos they're only trying to take caution. And in majority of the cases, a little cajoling and explanation does the trick.

If the Man is responsible and has proven beyond reasonable doubt that he can take care of you and cherish you, then why not.

Here is a perfect reply.

Luckygurl:


30-35 years is the ideal age most men marry.
Except the few that get married pretty early or late even.
That's not same for the ladies y'know

There is no place it is written that 30-35 is the ideal age for men to marry, it's an individual thing....

RoyalBlak007:



♤ Her family is making her decision for her

♤"My family believes I should finish first" . I guess it's up to the "Oga" now, if he's gonna wait for two years

Family decide for you when you don't have a working mind of your own.

Benita27:
My dear, the truth of the matter is, you don't see this guy as your prince charming 'cause if you did, the moment he mentioned marriage you'd have accepted. Abi if Dangote's son comes to marry you, would you ask him to wait for you to finish school?.

Babe easy on her okay..

Luckygurl:
Oga should chill for you to graduate na
Less than two years isn't such a long time.

You guys can do it gradually.
Maybe introduction sometime next year, traditional marriage too. Then leave white wedding till after you write your final exams.

Very Good dear, Your last statement ought to be your first and the first the last advice.

Op, are you really prepared for marriage with him after your schooling? If not, I think you guys need to sit and have serious talk about the future together. I guess your scared and have so much plans you would love to accomplish. Furthermore, you still think your young and have enough time before marriage.

Love, patience and understanding is what matters most in marriage. You both can still build a successful future together. Never wait for a man of value to be made before you consider him good for marriage. You will be adored more when your support and success towards him leads to his breakthrough too.

PenisCaP:
U said u have less dan 2yrs..
If he cant chill for that long then he is notent for u.
He is 30 now and would be 31 or 32 then.. not much difference if u ask me.

Unless he is scared of something else(maybe he is suspecting u ar seeing some1 else who might snatch u awys from him)

Otherwise i d suggest u finish ur school first

he's 32 already. plus i'm not seeing anyone else

izaray:
Babe easy on her okay..

It's the truth na. Women enjoy marriage when the guy has a strong financial base. No stress!.

Benita27:
Family decide for you when you don't have a working mind of your own.

i live with my parents, and no matter how i'd want to deny it, they still do have a say in who i end up with..

Benita27:
It's the truth na. Women enjoy marriage when the guy has a strong financial base. No stress!.

I dey feel you jare..But not all women, i guess she dn't love the man in question. Saw one corper today in Abj, inside one big vehicle standing and carring her baby on her back with all the traffic, and she was still cool with dat.

Edrick:

i live with my parents, and no matter how i'd want to deny it, they still do have a say in who i end up with..

I see...
They all have a say in whom you marry 'cause you would need their approval and blessing but that depends on how willing you're to marry that person.

izaray:
I dey feel you jare..But not all women, i guess she dn't love the man in question. Saw one corper today in Abj, inside one big vehicle standing and carring her baby on her back with all the traffic, and she was still cool with dat.

That's what happens when love supercedes every other thing.

Edrick:

he's 32 already. plus i'm not seeing anyone else

Hmm 34 yrs is also not too late.
He should be worried when is over 35-37 n still single.

Tell him to chil since u have 1yr +left.
If he likes he can put the ring on the last day of yur paper since he is so desperate.
I still wonder why he is dat desparate tho.
That age is not a valid excuse bcoz hez not that late.

Has he done marriage intro ?

Benita27:
That's what happens when love supercedes every other thing.

Sure..