One of my colleagues was giving me some gist yesterday about his friend and I decided to share the story. Here it goes:

A guy, lets call him Brian, met a girl in NYSC camp. This girl is from a distinguished and quite prominent Lagos family, while the guy's family were below middle class. After some serious wooing by the guy they started dating, and over time the girl fell head-over-heels in love.

Post-service year, the girl got a good paying job, quite good by all standards, however the guy was unable to get a job, seeing Nigeria as it is.

Obviously she, with the help of her family, tried to secured him some interviews but they never worked out.
For the first four years the girl supported her boyfriend, got him a flat, paid for their vacations, and they were the ideal couple, displaying their love on social media. Brian put her picture perpetually as his display picture. Life was good, the guy proposed and they picked a intro for 3 months and wedding 9 months after hoping and praying the guy will get a job by then and they wouldn't have to rely on her family.

A month after introduction, prayers got answered! The girl's aunt hooked Brian up with an interview and he got a job at a bank. Six months into working, with his babes help he changed his car, and omo boy started looking all fresh.

You would think this is where the story goes and they lived happily ever after right? Well not quite. With a new car, new job and money landing in his bank account every month, he stopped needing the girl's help. And, oh-so-newly-Mr self sufficient Brian started noticing all the 20-year old small yellow girls with big ass, short skirts and heels all around his office.

One month to the wedding, one month o, Brian cancelled the wedding invite they both sent on Facebook. When the babe's friend called her during a meeting saying "babe there was a mistake o, your book cancelled an the wedding invite sent on facebook", girl was just like "oh he's always sitting on his damn phone". Girl picked the phone to call Brian expecting to hear sorry baby it was a mistake. Well............... nope, no error there. Mr I just got me a job and looking fresh-Brian told babe he was calling off the wedding! Girl was like how, why, no fights, we are great. Well they weren't great according to Brian, he said he had been unhappy for the last five years, and that apparently three months into their relationship he realised she is not the kind of woman he sees himself marrying, because her family looks down on me.

Same family that got him a job, and through them literally survived for over four years? and he's just coming to that comclusion one month to the wedding.

Five years, one month to wedding! Invites everywhere! And they say babes be going crazy. Jesus se you are watching these people!.

Anyways that brings me to my point, is it worth growing up and going through thick and thin with someone, the whole nine yards of labour and giving your all when you are dating?. I am not particularly one-sided to think its just men that are selfish, people generally are selfish and self serving, they can overlook all your flaws when they need you, but once they believe they can self sustain or have other options they forget all you have been through. I have heard of a babe some guy sponsored to Uni and she thought she was too "learned" for him after so she dumped him.

So I do not judge people who can't do the long term investment in a relationship even though I have respect for people who still can give there all, not because they are naive, but because they want to. Ultimately, my opinion is, we should only give out of love instead of what we can get back (obviously what you can afford and doesn't break your account or back). Love is giving and love is kind, if he/she leaves you after all you do, he/she doesn't and couldn't ever have loved you, you deserve better, and I believe karma always has a way. Leave it to Karma.

just like it is said....leave it to karma...it happened to me twice and I left it to karma... the rest is history as karma did a very good job

TPound:
just like it is said....leave it to karma...it happened to me twice and I left it to karma... the rest is history as karma did a very good job

Bruh share ur experience with us nah, so people can learn from it too pls.

izaray:
Bruh share ur experience with us nah, so people can learn from it too pls.

bah...don't wanna open their fresh wounds...seeing this thread would remind them of their past

helping a man financially while dating is nt bad, many men out dere became great 2day bc of Dia woman but one needs 2 b thoroughly careful while doing dat:
1: always remember dat no law states dat d guy dating u must marry u.
2: if u ar dating a guy Dats nt urs, no matter hw much u spend, he wl stl walk out.
3: not every guy deserves ur financial help, some wl collect from u and gv 2 anoda lady.
If u wish 2 help, do dat wit ur brain and dnt overdo.

Right. If I help friends, why shouldn't I help my partner biko?

and if the partner leaves you a week to your wedding like this nko

Blackhawk01:
Right. If I help friends, why shouldn't I help my partner biko?

mollysteeze:
and if the partner leaves you a week to your wedding like this nko

I'll cry cry cry and cry, dust my arse and move on. Shii happens.

I don't help because we're dating or I expect something in return, I only do it because I'm in the position to do so, albeit wisely.

If you're in a position to help, my dear help and forget about any reward...

If the person you helped is sensible enough, he/she wouldn't wait to be told what to do. That's how I operate

Choose who to help wisely because not everyone down n dejected deserves help. All talk about helping without return should not be a recipe to help ingrates who when are in position will not help. It only shows how naive n foolish one is. The lady must have seen the signs or probably did look closely enough. In life you must prove you are worthy of help before it is granted. Guys who seek help from their girls to make it in life de try, shame no fit gree me.

a gal will give u all the sex in the world
but ask for money u will see if she really loves u or not.

women taught me to be stingy as hell and simultaneously i have become THE GOLD DIGGER OF GOLD DIGGERS.
many gals have complained i love money too much,like a woman. i take that as a compliment.and have gained many gals as friends.i guess they sense i have the same disease of golddigging like them
women respect a man who loves money like them
date me and i will leave u broke

i will disown my daughter if she falls for a broke ass guy. i have a friend who has slept with over 300 girls, he is currently dating a rich girl he disvirgined. 10 yrs older dan d babe and wud marry her when she grads. banking on d gals father to set him up after marriage. sometimes am tempted to tell d babe. smh

Nothing wrong in helping your boo out .... but .. ONLY ... if he is eager to work and not just sitting there depending on you to live, basically if he is actively seeking employment or better job it’s Fine ....


If it’s just some bf who does fuvk all then NO

for every relationship that failed there's another that worked.