It's time we start building a culture of self-sufficiency and that will go a long way, making each one us responsible for our own actions and inactions. I don't get why anyone who thinks they are capable of getting married should be asking for "support" from friends and well wishers.
if you are not prepared financially why would you want to get married when you know there is a long haul ahead of the life of marriage waiting for you ?

A friend of mine felt I did him wrong because I refused to "support" his wedding...When he told me of his marriage plans I asked him why he was getting married and he told me "I am not young anymore", can you believe that !? I told him I wasn't going to support because there are other choices including a small court wedding and an in-house traditional marriage that won't cost much, a big wedding with photoshoots is a luxury for me and a luxury lifestyle is a personal decision.

Few months before the wedding plans, I gave him some money to support his father's medical bills and even bought him a brand new laptop just to get his work going.
He feels I owe him some sort of support...did I say I hate people with self entitlement?

If you can't afford the wedding frivolities, please stick to what you know you can do with and we are only interested in your marriage after the wedding and not the drinks or whatever, heaven will not fall!
There is a thread of how 6 people attended a wedding ceremony of some couple, on weekday!

God bless you wel wel for dis post.

Brb

BedLam:
It's time we start building a culture of self-sufficiency and that will go a long way, making each one us responsible for our own actions and inactions. I don't get why anyone who thinks they are capable of getting married should be asking for "support" from friends and well wishers.
if you are not prepared financially why would you want to get married when you know there is a long haul ahead of the life of marriage waiting for you ?

A friend of mine felt I did him wrong because I refused to "support" his wedding...When he told me of his marriage plans I asked him why he was getting married and he told me "I am not young anymore", can you believe that !? I told him I wasn't going to support because there are other choices including a small court wedding and an in-house traditional marriage that won't cost much, a big wedding with photoshoots is a luxury for me and a luxury lifestyle is a personal decision.

Few months before the wedding plans, I gave him some money to support his father's medical bills and even bought him a brand new laptop just to get his work going.
He feels I owe him some sort of support...did I say I hate people with self entitlement?

If you can't afford the wedding frivolities, please stick to what you know you can do with and we are only interested in your marriage after the wedding and not the drinks or whatever, heaven will not fall!
There is a thread of how 6 people attended a wedding ceremony of some couple, on weekday!

Is anything wrong in supporting someone for his or her wedding if you've got money??

Mcoldsoja:
God bless you wel wel for dis post.

Abeg park well... Wetin you know??

bobokeshington:


Is anything wrong in supporting someone for his or her wedding if you've got money??

not when you will soak garri after homeymoon

funmisticqueen:
not when you will soak garri after homeymoon

you wey sponsor wedding suppose know say you go sponsor marriage too nah

bobokeshington:


you wey sponsor wedding suppose know say you go sponsor marriage too nah

if i hear, better things to do with cash

funmisticqueen:
if i hear, better things to do with cash

so you can't help a friend in need Abi?

bobokeshington:


so you can't help a friend in need Abi?

That is not a friend in need but a fiend with longthroat

funmisticqueen:
That is not a friend in need but a fiend with longthroat

lolz

bobokeshington:


Is anything wrong in supporting someone for his or her wedding if you've got money??

Yes. It's wrong...doing owambe is a luxury to me like I stated. If you want it then make sure you are able to handle it especially when I'm not your father or mother.

funmisticqueen:
That is not a friend in need but a fiend with longthroat

Right.

Go sit down....fada christmas

bobokeshington:


Is anything wrong in supporting someone for his or her wedding if you've got money??

Theres is nothing wrong in supporting someone for their wedding if u have the money [/color] But there is something wrong when u get angry at someone for not supporting your wedding, you chose to marry and u should not be depending on donations and good gestutres from the beginning.... that should be a bonus.[color=#006600]

A friend has stop talking to me recently because I didn't buy the wife's wedding gown....how is that my business He particularly ask for a wedding gown (I'm I a Tailor?)...supporting him should be any gift I'm comfortable with not what he wants.... funny enough I haven't met the girl... because he broke up with one who use to cook for us when there was nothing and d going was tough.

Madisonsqua:
Theres is nothing wrong in supporting someone for their wedding if u have the money [/color] But there is something wrong when u get angry at someone for not something your wedding, you chose to marry and u should not be depending on donations and good gestutres from the beginning.... that should be a bonus.[color=#006600]

A friend has stop talking to me recently because I didn't buy the wife's wedding gown....how is that my business He particularly ask for a wedding gown (I'm I a Tailor?)...supporting him should be any gift I'm comfortable with not what he wants.... funny enough I haven't met the girl... because he broke up with one who use to cook for us when there was nothing and d going was tough.

Lol. They are always like that...imagine asking you to buy wedding gown. Why didn't he invite to test run the babe ?

Any man who can't take care of his marriage expenses but run from office to office, house to house and send uncountable number of emails & SMSs for people to marry the wife for him, such a man must be rejected by the would-be wife.

It is even sheer madness to think of marriage when you can't even bankroll your marriage rites, which is just like laying the foundation. It must be understood that those who beg for marriage support are also invariably those who beg to feed the wife and children, pay school fees and medical care etc.

It's even more silly to think that a man who can't lay common foundation will somehow put finishing touches to it.

If so be that people attend your marriage rites with gifts as a tradition, fine. But then, it is not your right or entitlement. In fact, no one is owing you anything!

The only thing I agree with here is that sense of entitlement sucks. In that sense, it is OK not to assist. No one should feel entitled to someone else's money, especially when it is not your parent's money. A little persuasive nudging could work but not a smug sense of entitlement.

Splinz:
Any man who can't take care of his marriage expenses but run from office to office, house to house and send uncountable number of emails & SMSs for people to marry the wife for him, such a man must be rejected by the would-be wife.

It is even sheer madness to think of marriage when you can't even bankroll your marriage rites, which is just like laying the foundation. It must be understood that those who beg for marriage support are also invariably those who beg to feed the wife and children, pay school fees and medical care etc.

It's even more silly to think that a man who can't lay common foundation will somehow put finishing touches to it.

If so be that people attend your marriage rites with gifts as a tradition, fine. But then, it is not your right or entitlement. In fact, no one is owing you anything!

. Very well spoken.