Chinani, I have a response at the end of my post. And it says, I use direct deposit, so no need submitting any paycheck.

Alls I am saying is that I am in total agreement with the Bible, (on the roles of wives and husbands) and that is why I am not married yet. I know for a fact that, supposed there was a paycheck to give to a guy, I probably can't do that right now. And that is why I am not married yet. If I do get married tho, then I will give him the paycheck. Cos really, what is he going to do with it? Spend my money? Nah, not going to happen.

Chinani, hope I have made myself clear on the topic. How is Texas? Still hot as hell?

Yes I read the direct deposit line. I ignored it b/c it did not answer the central question of economical submission. Even w/ direct deposit a woman could "submit" by signing over her account or only withdrawing per her husband's instructions. Now I see your point of view which is fine b/c everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

TX is still hot & humid.

Give my husband my paycheck afi ti we-re ba se mi nikan.

i mean its one thing for you to give it to him because thats your routine to pay bills and u know where the money is going.

But just hand him your check when he isnt the one that worked for it. apon ti sun. aye iba yen ti lo.

O HELL NO!!!

I would never give my husband my paycheck.

Our rules upon engagement was that.

My money was my money, His money was also mine. Well thats how I put it.

I agree with you 110% kiwibabe, my money is mine, his money is ours

j-girl:

I agree with you 110% kiwibabe, my money is mine, his money is ours

Thank you Girl!!!

If we are going to keep looking good for our men, we need finance, and if he doesnt want to pay up we can rely on ourselves. You know. Do the independant women thing.

Therefore we are still allowing the men in our lives to be in charge like they always feel they should, and support his family.

At least they will feel responsible taking care of us

at IAH,

"Hmmm it's easy to sit one's fat ass behind a compurra and claim wealth, maturity, experience, good marriage etc. Have you been to their houses and seen that they've got good marriages worth brandishing the way you've done in this quote above"

I must have mentioned somewhere that it is not easy , and for your info I do have a very good marriage which I thank God for.

It is only money at the end of the day. Are you all saying that the man you will choose to marry(I am assuming you are not married) will not be responble or trustworthy enough, then ladies it is better not to be married at all than to get married and let money break down your marriages.
Experience is the best teacher, come back after you have been married.

For the record since this an anonymous forum(for me anyway) I am very educated with a very good job and earn more than my husband, so those of mentioning education, it is nothing really where your marriage is concerned.

@mikun
So only marrieds can speak on this thread? We should all just shut up until married? I guess life doesn't start until I get a husband. . .does anyone have a man who can validate my existence while relieving from the weight of my check? Please, I'm desperate!!!!

Ok, all kidding aside, I'm not saying it's a big deal. I'm just saying that both partners can submit both their checks to the family piggy bank. If it's not a "big deal" that should "break marriage" why doesn't your husband submit his check to you? But perhaps you've never asked. . .perhaps he can't speak on it until he has a husband of his own for vaildation.

Absolutely not. Why should the man get the woman's paycheck. Gone are those days when the woman was a house wife and had to depend on the man for everything. If the woman works like the man does, they should control how they will take care of their finances. A woman should respect her man but absolutely not submit her paycheck to a man. In fact, these days most women manage household finances and paying the bills so I don't think it applies to most people anyway.

The ideal family is one where the husband and wife are equal, it is not a case of submitting your paycheck for him to manage or him submitting his paycheck to you,
but at the end of each month, two of you draw up a budget based on combined income for the month, your anticipated expenses, necessary investments and other family financial obligations, some money is also set aside for each person as 'spend however you like money'.

Each expenditure is debated, planned and agreed to by both of you before it is made. This way, the family is run as a unit, great savings can be made and you guuys might really retire young and rich.

However, when everyone is his own master, money is wasted on frivolities and the financial vision of the family unit is lost in a maze of questionable independence.

Your money and his money should always be OUR MONEY, OUR, OUR, OUR, TWO PEOPLE WHO BECOME ONE, thats the whole essence of getting married abi

mikun:

and for your info I do have a very good marriage which I thank God for.

Clap for yourself.
I've not even said you don't have a good marriage. I just asked someone if she's been to your home before 'mouthing' it.

mikun:

Experience is the best teacher, come back after you have been married.

You may call the Admin to lock this thread and give special access to only married peops lol. And by the way, the topic is not "Do you submit----" it said "Would you submit---" Figure out the difference.

That said, I do agree with the rest of your points. I've only picked out the ones that do not go down well with me.

I must have been misunderstood along the lines. I am not just giving my husband my money and he is squandering the money as he likes, it goes into a joint account and he administers as necessary.
I also stand by my point , there are so many things that as a spinster I never thought I would do as a married woman but once you get married it all goes out of the window, I am no longer my own person, I decided to get married so therefor I have to agree to become one in everything, and same goes for my husband.

It is up to individuals to choose if they want to be one in everything or choose to be cling to somethings regardless of what the other spouse wants, at the end of the day as you make your bed so will you lie on it.

yES , OOO SINCE BOTH OF THEM ARE ONE.IN THE BIBLE WHEN ADAM SAW EVE THE FIST TIME HE SAYS THIS IS THE BONE OF MY BONE THE FLESH OF MY FLESH SHE SHALL BE CALL WOMAN,BOTH OF THE ARE NAKED BUT NOT ASHAMED.

chinani:

@mikun

Ok, all kidding aside, I'm not saying it's a big deal. I'm just saying that both partners can submit both their checks to the family piggy bank. If it's not a "big deal" that should "break marriage" why doesn't your husband submit his check to you? But perhaps you've never asked. . .perhaps he can't speak on it until he has a husband of his own for vaildation.

I do not believe we should put both our pays into a joint a/c that leads to greed and you having to account for ever single penny you spend. (basically you have to ask permission from your partner, and if he's a tight ass git, you wont be getting sh*t) do you get my point. I believe you should both only put in equal amounts to cover stuff like bills and children if you have them.

lol, each time i pop in to read posts here, the conclusion is the same

everyone screaming they'd never submit their paychecks to their husbands is unmarried

everyone who is married finds that kind of sentiment strange

Submit Pay Check for what na?

Either he submits his paycheck or he submits his paycheck. Those are the options,

lol, each time i pop in to read posts here, the conclusion is the same

everyone screaming they'd never submit their paychecks to their husbands is unmarried

everyone who is married finds that kind of sentiment strange

Am afraid you are mistaken;

everyone screaming they'd never submit their paychecks to their husbands is either unmarried or married

everyone who is married, eh, eh, I mean a slave,  finds that kind of sentiment strange

Submit Pay Check for what na?

My sentiments exactly

though am not married but if i eventually get married i cant submit my paycheck to my hubby wat does he need it for?i cant!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Memunah:

though am not married but if i eventually get married i can't submit my paycheck to my hubby what does he need it for?i can't!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How do you plan on paying bills? Buying a house? Being fiscally responsible? Whether you directly hand someone a check or the two of you manage a joint account, some way, it has to happen.

BTW - you must have a joint account - spending of money in a marriage must be accountable to both people.

i share my life with you
my heart,my home, my soul ,my kids
ok i share everyother thing
but my paycheck hell no

Lets think about the situation logically. If you submit your payments to "the family piggy bank" and then say the unthinkable happens, your relationship does not work out, you end up in divorce, who gets the lions share of the money in that piggy bank.
ONE PARTNER ALWAYS LOSES. I KNOW I WILL DEFINATELY NOT BE IN THAT SITUATION TO LOOSE MY FINANCIAL SECURITY. I would be the first person knocking on the banks to door to prevent my soo called partner from getting access to my money.

as long as banks exist my hubby wont see my paycheck
what if i was being paid more than him?
that would bring unnecessary argumentss and hostility.

kiwibabe you soo right if the marriage does not work out, you will surfer
i really pity the wives who do that

What I earn shouldn't be a secret to my husband. But handing it over? Hmm he'l never ask me to. But if he were that kind of man, I'll give it over and make sure I finish mine and his before he knows it. What shameless man would do that?A man should take pride in providing for his family, the wife can only help if she has to.

hell no.if i worked for it its mine.go get urs.

YES i can. but first we must have joint account with an agreement that both of us has to sign cheque b4 anyone of us can withdraw from the accounts.

well it depends on trust though.

but i can do it.

Well i personally know of a naija lady who submits her paycheck, she never has phone credit and never has a decent stitch on her. She endures WAY to much abuse too!

I am sure that most people know how opinion poll are conducted.

It is done by sampling and it is quite clear from the majority on this site especially the women that they would NOT submit their paychecks to their husband. THis is a fact that we menfolk knew a longtime ago. Women only will share mens monies and not their own money.

In my own humble opinion majority of women are double standard and they always claim men don't love them.

Even some of the MEN agrees with them (women) in order not be shout down.
Only a fraction of those women said they will do it. IF this wome does it honestly as they claim they will do, they will be beter than all there other feminist who in some years to come will realise that the marriage are simply convenince for been looked after and children etc.

Let us look at the foundation of submission, it is biblical order by GOD and as such the woman paychecks or indeed that of the Man does not belongs to either the man or the woman, it belong to 'the family'

Any woman who cannot submit her paycheck to her husband cannot be submisssive to her husband as her paycheck is more important than her marriage.

The fact that a woman is submissive including her paycheck does not mean that the man goes on spending spree to spend 'the family' money. The Husband and wife sit down together and use all the monies wisely for present consumption and future development.

Some women even said that the woman monies belong to her and the man's monies belong to her(that says it all bunch of hypocritics)

Two becomes one on Marriage so love does not identify paycheck diffrent. Infact a good husband will even give his wife more money if she submit. Also some women who are not going to submit anyway see their earning more money as being better than their husband.

In my final submission I think the womenfolk should rethink their position about finding God fearing and loving husband to marry and submission of everything becomes first nature and there will be no secret between the TWO that has becomes ONE.

Even some are even thinking what happens if they were to divorce. Those are all arguments of a defeatist. The two shall join together and become one.

May God bless all of us and give us more wisdom.

@topic.
y would i give him my paycheck
is he jobless?? abi na him follow me go office, where i stay earn the money.
i will then submit MY own paycheck and then when i need money i will then be askin him 4 money like sey i dey poor.
he will know how much i am earnin but i will not hand it over. if he needs money he should come and ask me.
if ma husband tells me 2 satart handin oer my paycheck, i will satrt eating his money like hell.
after 2yrs of the marriage if him get up to 50,000 left for him account no be person go tell am say make him go use am hire lawyer
basides it is the husbands job 2 provide for his wife n not 2 shovel down her paycheck.

@vigasimple
My husband should respect me enough 2 let me keep my own paycheck ( God said respect ur wives)
and since the money belongs to 'the family' y cant the husband submit the paycheck 2 the wives
the husband should proide for his wife not eat her money.
and belive me its in the husbands best intrest that he leaves the paycheck 2 his wive if not catacata go burst.
And whats the diffrence from colectin her paycheck and then givin her money and lettin her keep her paycheck

submitting my paycheck to my husband is a HELL NO. bsides does this kind of thing still happen in this century