| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by XhosaNostra(f): 7:33pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
Opentokwowledge:
Lol. Everything is context hon. Repentance as I have used it there is meant to imply exactly what you've painstakingly explained. . .
In other news, How far? Anything for your boy?  Yeah, but who do they repent to, the ones who do it in the name of religion? There lies the difference. Personally, I give Bleep all about pastors etc & I don't see myself ever going to one to ask for forgiveness about anything I've done. That's between myself & my conscience aka "God". If I wanna change anything about myself, I'd be doing it for my own benefit (peace of mind, me on upgrade  etc) & not because of some fantastical notion about heaven or some other BS. Other than the shock of hearing about the death of someone I "know", I'm good. It's just some celebrity lol. He was so young, so his death really caught me by surprise. I still can't believe it. I think I'm hurt Your side? 1 Like |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by Opentokwowledge: 7:48pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
XhosaNostra:
Yeah, but who do they repent to, the ones who do it in the name of religion? There lies the difference. Personally, I give Bleep all about pastors etc & I don't see myself ever going to one to ask for forgiveness about anything I've done. That's between myself & my conscience aka "God". If I wanna change anything about myself, I'd be doing it for my own benefit (peace of mind, me on upgrade etc) & not because of some fantastical notion about heaven or some other BS.
Other than the shock of hearing about the death of someone I "know", I'm good. It's just some celebrity lol. He was so young, so his death really caught me by surprise. I still can't believe it. I think I'm hurt Your side? Again, I resonate your viewpoint. I, in fact find that norm of kneeling before a priest for whatever reason stupid and self-degrading. I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he a musician ? Plus What name does he go by when he was alive?... I can be a posthumous fan Everything is normal here, thanks  1 Like |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by XhosaNostra(f): 8:01pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
Opentokwowledge:
Again, I resonate your viewpoint. I, in fact find that norm of kneeling before a priest for whatever reason stupid and self-degrading.
I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he a musician ? Plus What name does he go by when he was alive?... I can be a posthumous fan
Everything is normal here, thanks True on the 1st part. No, he wasn't a musician. He was a TV presenter. There's a lot of memories there, because this is someone I grew up watching, even though we're almost the same age. It feels like l lost a part of my childhood lol. Very hard to explain His name is Akhumzi. When the young die, it makes death very real. My own mortality is somewhat put into perspective by his passing  |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by Opentokwowledge: 8:16pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
XhosaNostra:
True on the 1st part.
No, he wasn't a musician. He was a TV presenter. There's a lot of memories there, because this is someone I grew up watching, even though we're almost the same age. It feels like l lost a part of my childhood lol. Very hard to explain His name is Akhumzi. When the young die, it makes death very real. My own mortality is put into perspective by his passing I googled the name so, I can see he died from a car accident... Well, we all know Death gives life its meaning. It is a truth that's going to come to pass so, doesn't come as a rude shock to me no more. Lest I forget, I'm reading Mandela's Long Walk to Freedom now, and honestly, it's too much!  1 Like |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by coolh3ad(m): 8:22pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
BooTina:
Relationship is cool, so cool... but as cool as it is, it requires maturity, trust and understanding.
Men out there should learn from this little experience I had earlier this month.
Due to my fast approaching exams, I jokingly told my man not to call me or come visiting for some days. I needed to prepare for my exams and I don't want him around. Although he agreed, but some part of me tells me he would term it as another thing cuz he is a little bit clingy.
He called like 2 times between the period of my exams but I intentionally didn't pick his calls. I sometimes derive joy not picking his calls but deep down, I love him dearly. It makes me more like a superlady. I don't expect him to feel bad tho, afterall, he always claims he loves me and he knows I love him too.
Long story short, after my exams, I noticed he started acting weird, those sweet things he always did seized to exist. I talked to him about it and what he said got me.
His story: I am seeing someone else and I'm taking him for granted. I only used my exams to cover up. As a matter of fact, I changed my relationship status from "In a relationship" to "Single". Moments later, I tagged someone on facebook and wrote these words, "We understand the same language which is love"
My story: I and some friends were celebrating an indoor birthday party. We were playing the truth or dare game. I was dared to change my relationship status and tag someone who is crushing on me on facebook.
Fortunately for me, a friend recorded some part of the game and I just had to show my man what is.
So if I hadn't talked to him, he would've kept mute and think I'm the cheat here. I'm not saying what I did is entirely right, but he judged too quickly.
Well, he is not the type that talks much. The fact that he was unable to trust me has really reduced the way I feel about him. Only God can help us now, we are still together but things are really weird between us.
If you think this isn't real or we're still immature lazy yoots, I'm 24 and he is 26. In few years, we Might tie the knot. But in the meantime, pray for us, trust is really important in every relationship. What really is your point. Be forming superlady there and be playing "silly" truth or dare game. When you finally lose your man to another lady, your eye go clear...You have the feeling that he can't do without you...If you truly love him and you know he loves you too, its best you stop these your childish acts before you "do yourself by yourself". A word is enough for the wise... |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by Nobody: 8:35pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
XhosaNostra:
Bolded part number one: You sound like a game player. I can't believe you're blaming him for something you started. You not answering his calls is a cause for distrust! Finish. Your BF is indeed patient. I wouldn't be surprised if he is slowly losing interest in you too, because of the mind games you're playing. He should!
Bolded part number two: Is he a mind reader? Did you tell him this, so he doesn't jump to conclusions as a result of #1?
Bolded part number three: You must be fucking kidding! It should be the other way around. You're the one playing games & this is making YOU lose interest in HIM? Something is honestly not right with you. He should dump you asap. You cannot communicate effectively, but when someone cannot "read between the lines", you take it as an offence. Trust doesn't come straight out of a tap. If you wanna be trusted, make sure that you don't send mixed signals or act like an entitled c*nt when someone doesn't have the psychic powers you expect them to have.
All this is coming from someone with severe trust issues & I'm telling you that your behavior is the problem. It sets off alarm bells. Very shady. Even if someone doesn't normally have trust issues, I'm sure they'd grow suspicious when dating someone who ignores calls, is bad at communication & is gambling with her relationship without even having the decency to inform the other party about what is actually going on, so they wouldn't get the wrong idea. You're behaving very juvenile for your age. It's all your fault! 1 Like 
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| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by CrystalMax: 8:42pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
Your reasons for doing what you did were harmless but you communicated it to him as harmful (in my opinion o).
See, this trust issue thing starts from the things you feed your partner's mind with. If He had done same trying to prove Superman to you, won't you feel same way?
You expected him to know what your purpose for the needed space was with you "communicating" same to him?
It's natural for him to have acted that way my NL sister. |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by Rukkydelta(f): 8:42pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
Sis your boyfriend is a rare gem. You got a diamond and you want to use your hand to throw it away
Do you know how many girls like me that is praying to have diamonds in their lives? even though he is not complete we are going to manage him if he is half
Diamonds are hard to come by so you better hold him tight. And stop those proudful attitude of yours, I read where you stated you played hard to get when he was wooing you, now that you both are in a relationship you got to stop playing hard, be more committed to your relationship and appreciate your diamond.
Good luck in your endeavors. |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by XhosaNostra(f): 8:46pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
Opentokwowledge:
I googled the name so, I can see he died from a car accident... Well, we all know Death gives life its meaning. It is a truth that's going to come to pass so, doesn't come as a rude shock to me no more. Lest I forget, I'm reading Mandela's Long Walk to Freedom now, and honestly, it's too much! Lol, what's "too much" about it? |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by Opentokwowledge: 8:50pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
XhosaNostra:
Lol, what's "too much" about it? Everything. It is so detailed! 1 Like |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by pryme(m): 9:03pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
XhosaNostra:
Bolded part number one: You sound like a game player. I can't believe you're blaming him for something you started. You not answering his calls is a cause for distrust! Finish. Your BF is indeed patient. I wouldn't be surprised if he is slowly losing interest in you too, because of the mind games you're playing. He should!
Bolded part number two: Is he a mind reader? Did you tell him this, so he doesn't jump to conclusions as a result of #1?
Bolded part number three: You must be fucking kidding! It should be the other way around. You're the one playing games & this is making YOU lose interest in HIM? Something is honestly not right with you. He should dump you asap. You cannot communicate effectively, but when someone cannot "read between the lines", you take it as an offence. Trust doesn't come straight out of a tap. If you wanna be trusted, make sure that you don't send mixed signals or act like an entitled c*nt when someone doesn't have the psychic powers you expect them to have.
All this is coming from someone with severe trust issues & I'm telling you that your behavior is the problem. It sets off alarm bells. Very shady. Even if someone doesn't normally have trust issues, I'm sure they'd grow suspicious when dating someone who ignores calls, is bad at communication & is gambling with her relationship without even having the decency to inform the other party about what is actually going on, so they wouldn't get the wrong idea. You're behaving very juvenile for your age. It's all your fault! Goodness me, coming from a lady - I must say you have perception. I have been in this position before, I left the relationship without saying a word. If the guy ignores what she did and continue the relationship, they will have created a conducive environment to easily cheat on each other. A man that has good intentions will want nothing to do with such relationship. 1 Like |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by pryme(m): 9:07pm On Apr 29, 2018 |
XhosaNostra:
Yeah, but who do they repent to, the ones who do it in the name of religion? There lies the difference. Personally, I give Bleep all about pastors etc & I don't see myself ever going to one to ask for forgiveness about anything I've done. That's between myself & my conscience aka "God". If I wanna change anything about myself, I'd be doing it for my own benefit (peace of mind, me on upgrade etc) & not because of some fantastical notion about heaven or some other BS.
Other than the shock of hearing about the death of someone I "know", I'm good. It's just some celebrity lol. He was so young, so his death really caught me by surprise. I still can't believe it. I think I'm hurt Your side? Avicii? |
| Re: Having Trust Issues In Your Relationship Is Bad by XhosaNostra(f): 6:44am On Apr 30, 2018 |
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