Very sad human beings!!!


How can you marry and have kids with people you don't trust??

I see many women on NTA crying how their husbands family has abandoned them, and i wonder how they were able to collect benefits from the company/insurance companies by passing the wives

Seems some Nigerian men have been conditioned to have a distrust fr their own wives!!!


Cant believe what I'm reading here o!!!

so much for God fearing man/women

cruel barbaric society!

I know a woman whose husband died with so much money in his account but because he did not include wife, child, or even a family member as his next of Kin, the wife has to beg family members and friends just to be able to sustain herself and the child he left behind. It is an everyday challenge for her to get a letter of administration from the courts. Till my mum passed away we kept struggling to get the same letter of administration which we are yet to get till date. That was the mistake my Father made and we have to suffer for it.

Whether your wife is a tyrant or not you need to put her as next of kin for some of your assets, also put your child as next of Kin for assets you intentionally want to leave for him/her when they come of age. Above all the welfare of your family when they are not there is paramount, if you have a sibling you trust and are close to you can use them as next of kin alongside your wife as co signatory.

Bros,dere r many replies.I just want U to think deeply abt all these replies b.cos we re all guessing.

Bros,dere r many replies.I just want U to think deeply abt all these replies b.cos we re all guessing.

Viewing your post from different angles,you child is just one year old,the best bet would have been your wife to be the next of kin,then maybe by time the child clocks 18,you can change it.

degubi:

I know a woman whose husband died with so much money in his account but because he did not include wife, child, or even a family member as his next of Kin, the wife has to beg family members and friends just to be able to sustain herself and the child he left behind. It is an everyday challenge for her to get a letter of administration from the courts. Till my mum passed away we kept struggling to get the same letter of administration which we are yet to get till date. That was the mistake my Father made and we have to suffer for it.

is that the way it goes in 9ja?! so who got the money that was left in the acount? shouldnt the spouse automatically get all his belongings if her partner dies without a will?

I'm assuming most of the posters are in Nigeria because in the US, your spouse is your automatic next of kin unless you specifically say otherwise.

@OP: to be honest, I'm questioning your judgment if you think a toddler is a better next of kin than your wife. Do you actually know the rights of a NOK? It's not only monetary but they have the right over your LIFE ie. they can pull the plug on you or continue treatment if you're ill. Do you really want a baby having that much control over your affairs? If you still think making Baby Boy your NOK is the best course of action, man. . .your house must be in shambles, my friend. And you don't want to tell your wife about your decision to change NOK? You're sneaky and I hope your wife knows the person she's dealing with. I bet you'd be up in arms if she designated someone else as her heir without telling you but here you are deciding her future with strangers. I have a feeling your are keeping  back part of the story but that's your right; I just hope you grow a pair and talk to your WIFE about your decision.

I'm my husband's next of kin but I will not feel bad if he uses our son as the next of kin.
cos to me, it's still the same thing.

When will people understand that they and their wife are one. It is sad to know that most men just marry because they want to have children and when they have, they pay less attention to their wife. Children that will grow up and have their own home and still leave you and your wife. Your wife is suppose to be your next of kin, unless she is a bad wife, if you want to will your wealth you can do that and your wife is suppose to benefit more than your children because she supported in it and that means it is hers too. Train your children well and let them also fight for their own wealth.

Your wife should be your next of Kin all things being equal.

wife?why?
hey man u wanna die befor your time.
use your tongue and count your teeth.
alles klar.

your wife should be your next of kin untill either her death or your sons say 16 or 18th biirthday. do you want a 3 year old making medical or finiancial decisions when you are ill or near death?

@MRbrownJAY - is that the way it goes in 9ja?! so who got the money that was left in the acount? shouldnt the spouse automatically get all his belongings if her partner dies without a will?

The Banks will not release the funds in a customer's account after his/her demise except the person in question is the next of kin stated in the account opening forms and even the next of kin in question must go through a lot of verification.

A situation where no one is stated as next of kin, a letter of administration from the court can be gotten by the spouse appointing her the custodian of all the man's assets. The frighting aspect of it is that the man's relatives could also get the same letter declaring them custodians of the man's assets thereby sideligning the wife and children of the man. That is why it is imperative that a man puts his affairs in order because his demise can mean suffering for the family he leaves behind.

I wouldn't make my wife my next of kin, though I love her so much. My son is most appropriate.

Just the thought that she might be enjoying my wealth with another man after my death puts me off

degubi:

@MRbrownJAY - is that the way it goes in 9ja?! so who got the money that was left in the acount? shouldnt the spouse automatically get all his belongings if her partner dies without a will?

The Banks will not release the funds in a customer's account after his/her demise except the person in question is the next of kin stated in the account opening forms and even the next of kin in question must go through a lot of verification.

A situation where no one is stated as next of kin, a letter of administration from the court can be gotten by the spouse appointing her the custodian of all the man's assets. The frighting aspect of it is that the man's relatives could also get the same letter declaring them custodians of the man's assets thereby sideligning the wife and children of the man. That is why it is imperative that a man puts his affairs in order because his demise can mean suffering for the family he leaves behind.

thanks for the insight of how its done in 9ja. are you saying that a sibling/parent has got as much power as a wife in these situations in 9ja and its just about who get their hand on the loot first?!

Akwasi:

I wouldn't make my wife my next of kin, though I love her so much. My son is most appropriate.
Just the thought that she might be enjoying my wealth with another man after my death puts me off

you would expect her to remain miserable for the rest of her life and s*exless, right?! INCREDIBLE THINKING!!!!!! even in death, the egotistic state of mind of most 9ja men would have them fail!
this man would rather that his widow and child suffer than be happy when he is ashes! just like taking your money to your grave with you, nonsense!

if i was married and died, i would want my wifey to go on LIVING and be happy with whomever she sees fit!

Most people dont understand what a next of kin is.

This is the person that can take a decision for you when you cant, This is the person who would held responsible incase you are not available.

Lets assume a life and death decision has to be made that means they would ask your 2yr old son LOL.

Regarding your wealth you are trying to protect, If you make your child who is 1yr old the beneficiary, Its still indirectly going to your wife.

For me,
When young- My parents
When older but unmarried- My Brother and My parents
When married - My wife with a clause that she ceases to be the moment she marries another person.
When I am old and my son is over 18yrs. Becomes my son

'Next of kin' is not exclusively reserved to matters of inheritance. It also refers to someone who could stand in your stead as Kanayo pointed out. This is so, especially, in matters of life and death as in pulling the plug on a life support mechanism when life, if preserved, would not be worth living (think of a vegetative state). I know Africans hate to 'think' of death, yet it is the end of all mortals.

This is a great thread really good info, also shows how much trust some people have in their partners. Really makes you wonder if marriage is all its supposed to be

for some, this is the mentality they enter any relationship with:


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@poster,                                                                             if i:m in you shoes i wouldn't think twice i go for the wife. She is you soulmate and the mother of you son. You asserted that you love her then if she is not the one who is it then?

if i:m in you're shoe i go for wify

Na wa o. Dude, its Wify and no one else. no clause or comma there.

@ladeeh09 : Believe me, marriage is not what it seems. But, if you are lucky to find your 'soul-mate' it is blissful. That is rare though.

Remember your marital vow , If this still holds, there is no reason why she wouldn't be your NOK.

as a final yr law student of A.A.U. Ekpoma, i will advice that being next of kin does not make the person your personnal administrator on your death, however, the person serves as the closest person that could be reached on any matter affecting and relating to you. if you die without a will and all your entries shows this person to be your next of kin, it COULD/MAY be easily accepted that this person should be your administrator. last year, in lagos, a driver of a transport company died. the man had no will and most of all, he wrote his brother as his next of kin even when he got the job after marriage. it was difficult for her lawyer my relative to negociate her benefits. however, also, it should be noted that according to the law, the next administrator or person entitled to the estate of a deceased without will is the surviving wife. so the next of kin thing will naturally be nothing legal.

It's wiser.

yep, your WIFE

may sound odd, but women are extremely dangerous! if you have a child, use him as Next of Kin. if you don't leave it to your aged parents.

what the hell? why marry someone you consider dangerous.

that psychiatrist may be right after all, most of us must be really crazy.

Yes as long as she dosent know. Safety first.

Your wife should be your next of kin - unless you don't trust her.

If you are concerned about her being mistreated in the event of your death, that is more of a reason to make her your next of kin. If your son is the next of kin, she could be sidelined and completely denied any access to your estate by the family.

as long as u are not married to more than one wife for now make your only wife the next of kin,since your son is one year old now,start teaching him on how to manage ur estate,when he has come of age u can then make him ur next of kin (without telling ur wife.)

Your next of Kin should naturally be your wife. What God has joined together,let not distrust and love of material things put asunder. Cheers.


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