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Help! What's Going On In Her Head? - Romance - Nairaland

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Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by blackjack21(m): 9:15am On Nov 26, 2018
Hello, guys.
I'm a guy who hardly go on romantic quest. I have not proposed interest to any girl since like the last blue moon.
So, this damsel came in town and we bonded immediately, went on night out together twice, went to the movies, something I hardly do because I always download my films. Once we even sat outside drinking wine and watching the starry sky.
I was falling in love and I thought she felt the same way, and someone has to make the approach. Which is supposed to be the man (based on social norm).
Against my better judgement, I went and express my feelings for her but, she flatly contradicts and said 'I'm sorry, I like you but, just as a friend. You're nice and cool, bla blah... ' but she want us to remain friends. I said OK.

I buried her beneath my subconscious mind, and forgot about her. I fell back to my works and became even more meticulous.

Fast forward, some months later she called me and said she wanted to see me.
When we met, she told me that she's going back to her state and she wanted to tell me herself.
I expressed my gratitude for that and offered to help her in any way I can. She said she doesn't want anything. I said my goodbyes to her and started to leave but she stopped me and began to talk about the other day I went to tell her that I love her. She started to spin yarns about it, saying how I change and don't smile at her 'genuinely' like I used to, or call her.

I told her the truth, that was just busy. I told her that I still feel the same way if that's what she wanted to know and there's still a chance for us, she said NO. I said OK.

Now, I don't understand at all, why would she brought that up? And later on say No again?

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by donbachi(m): 9:19am On Nov 26, 2018
Na shakara

1 Like

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by MJBOLT(m): 9:27am On Nov 26, 2018
friendzone tinz

1 Like

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by Oreofepeters(m): 9:34am On Nov 26, 2018
Just like this guy above me, it's aa friend zone stuff. Get yourself another girl afterall there are many fish in the ocean.....

3 Likes

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by OneSentence(m): 9:44am On Nov 26, 2018
just move on. she'll come back and ask the same question again. but the moment u make the mistake of chasing and pestering her she'll take u for granted again...keep your mind on other things...
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by samysmoothfresh: 9:45am On Nov 26, 2018
Like the two guys above me rightly said, na friendzone things.

These kinda girls are the worst "friendzoners"

they will friendzone you and still taunt you.
I'm so grateful to Allah saff isnt like that.

2 Likes

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by yarimo(m): 9:59am On Nov 26, 2018
Op just run for your life, your villagers want to use the girl and succeed in your case.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by daviesblaze(m): 10:18am On Nov 26, 2018
You fvcked the moment you expressed your feelings for her.

Dude man up and go book an appointment with @HARDDON to help you get your poo together

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by blackjack21(m): 11:19am On Nov 26, 2018
MJBOLT:
friendzone tinz
Oreofepeters:
Just like this guy above me, it's aa friend zone stuff. Get yourself another girl afterall there are many fish in the ocean.....

I can do that but, I don't go chasing about like some player. Only someone I feel a connection with.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by blackjack21(m): 11:21am On Nov 26, 2018
daviesblaze:
You fvcked the moment you expressed your feelings for her.

Dude man up and go book an appointment with @HARDDON to help you get your poo together

Who's HARDDON?
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by daviesblaze(m): 12:01pm On Nov 26, 2018
blackjack21:


Who's HARDDON?

No. 1 Relationship and dating expert.

https://www.nairaland.com/2893475/dating-drills-guys-only/

Thank me later

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by Originalsly: 12:26pm On Nov 26, 2018
Bro...you want a bf/gf relationship..... she wants a friend relationship. Both you and she needed more time to know each other better before deciding if you should be in a relationship. You took the plunge....she didn't. ... and you pretty much felt rejected and backed away period. She said no again. ...either because she needs more time to know you better or..... more likely... she already is in a stable relationship and is now reuniting with that person in her State. I'm sure you never did find out if she is in a relationship before you dashed her your heart.

1 Like

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by ChopBellefull(m): 12:27pm On Nov 26, 2018
You need to read Harddon thread bro.... U were in line, u would hv gotten her if u never talked abt feelings for her again. She ws already feeling unimportant (which girls hate most) and u made her feel important by toasting her again

4 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by Neafemee: 12:29pm On Nov 26, 2018
My question is; Is she in a relationship?
If yes, maybe she is trying to keep you as an alternative, should her supposed relationship don't work out.
In my opinion,you are in the friend-zone, and she is trying to play safe as well.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by blackjack21(m): 1:38pm On Nov 26, 2018
Neafemee:
My question is; Is she in a relationship?
If yes, maybe she is trying to keep you as an alternative, should her supposed relationship don't work out.
In my opinion,you are in the friend-zone, and she is trying to play safe as well.


Originalsly:
Bro...you want a bf/gf relationship..... she wants a friend relationship. Both you and she needed more time to know each other better before deciding if you should be in a relationship. You took the plunge....she didn't. ... and you pretty much felt rejected and backed away period. She said no again. ...either because she needs more time to know you better or..... more likely... she already is in a stable relationship and is now reuniting with that person in her State. I'm sure you never did find out if she is in a relationship before you dashed her your heart.

Actually, we have known each other for months, before I made the approach, I codedly asked her if anybody would get jealous seeing us together. She said, No. she went further and say she's not in any relationship.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by Jayslicky: 1:48pm On Nov 26, 2018
Dude you should move on, she has just friendzone you and she feels it's interesting playing with your emotions. I advice you get a girl to cool you off so the tensions in you can diminish.
Don't take her as your enemy, infact act like you fine with her decision and give her less attention, who knows she may like your new bad boy charms.

3 Likes

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by PaulAris: 8:20am On Nov 27, 2018
daviesblaze:

No. 1 Relationship and dating expert.
https://www.nairaland.com/2893475/dating-drills-guys-only/
Thank me later
My mahn!
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by Gaspardd(m): 8:39am On Nov 27, 2018
I think u have too much ego, u re too uptight and u sound too socially inept. Just my take

1 Like

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by AryEmber(f): 9:57am On Nov 27, 2018
Please, look for someone else! I understand if she was playing hard to get the first time but after? You derserve someone who's sure about what she want and stick with it.

1 Like

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by chenzen(m): 10:13am On Nov 27, 2018
blackjack21:
Hello, guys.
I'm a guy who hardly go on romantic quest. I have not proposed interest to any girl since like the last blue moon.
So, this damsel came in town and we bonded immediately, went on night out together twice, went to the movies, something I hardly do because I always download my films. Once we even sat outside drinking wine and watching the starry sky.
I was falling in love and I thought she felt the same way, and someone has to make the approach. Which is supposed to be the man (based on social norm).
Against my better judgement, I went and express my feelings for her but, she flatly contradicts and said 'I'm sorry, I like you but, just as a friend. You're nice and cool, bla blah... ' but she want us to remain friends. I said OK.

I buried her beneath my subconscious mind, and forgot about her. I fell back to my works and became even more meticulous.

Fast forward, some months later she called me and said she wanted to see me.
When we met, she told me that she's going back to her state and she wanted to tell me herself.
I expressed my gratitude for that and offered to help her in any way I can. She said she doesn't want anything. I said my goodbyes to her and started to leave but she stopped me and began to talk about the other day I went to tell her that I love her. She started to spin yarns about it, saying how I change and don't smile at her 'genuinely' like I used to, or call her.

I told her the truth, that was just busy. I told her that I still feel the same way if that's what she wanted to know and there's still a chance for us, she said NO. I said OK.

Now, I don't understand at all, why would she brought that up? And later on say No again?
pls OP check my threads and read " NICE GUYS FINISH LAST" and u ll discover the root of ur confusion.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by Pelumar(m): 10:51am On Nov 27, 2018
Oreofepeters:
Just like this guy above me, it's aa friend zone stuff. Get yourself another girl afterall there are many fish in the ocean.....
ma lo friendzone mi i no bi ur brother (in adekunle gold voice)
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by Jayhazard(m): 10:56am On Nov 27, 2018
Gaspardd:
I think u have too much ego, u re too uptight and u sound too socially inept. Just my take
I don't see any sign of egocentrism or social ineptitude in his post. The lady wouldn't have enjoyed hanging out with him (as evidenced in his post) if he had any of these qualities.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by NLModsAreStupud: 10:59am On Nov 27, 2018
Another year is passing by, your friends are getting married nd you are still there claiming that all men are players.. Keep waiting You will marry the referee.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by Headlesschicken(m): 11:00am On Nov 27, 2018
undecided All Dix stress just to sweat on top of somebody's daughter...

1 Like

Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by blackjack21(m): 12:11pm On Nov 28, 2018
chenzen:
pls OP check my threads and read " NICE GUYS FINISH LAST" and u ll discover the root of ur confusion.

Yeah, I hear that from a lot of people. I know I can be mean and be a player, but that's not the choice I made, I chose to be the nice guy and the gentleman. I'm sure there's someone for everyone.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by blackjack21(m): 12:18pm On Nov 28, 2018
OneSentence:
just move on. she'll come back and ask the same question again. but the moment u make the mistake of chasing and pestering her she'll take u for granted again...keep your mind on other things...

Thanks.
That's what I planned to do, I just keep wondering what kind of game she's playing by calling me and talking about the other day.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by chenzen(m): 12:26pm On Nov 28, 2018
blackjack21:


Yeah, I hear that from a lot of people. I know I can be mean and be a player, but that's not the choice I made, I chose to be the nice guy and the gentleman. I'm sure there's someone for everyone.
dont assume that old line that theres someone out there for everyone or that what will be will be.

U av to take action by putting things in motion to get ur desired result by shaping ur destiny with ur choices daily.



Decision + Action × choices = DESTINY


MEANWHILE...

KARMA WILL FAVOUR U NICELY WITH GOOD REWARDS FOR BEING NICE.


BUT DO NOT FORGET


THERE S FORMULA OF GETTING AHEAD IN THIS LIFE
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by blackjack21(m): 12:54pm On Nov 28, 2018
chenzen:
dont assume that old line that theres someone out there for everyone or that what will be will be.

U av to take action by putting things in motion to get ur desired result by shaping ur destiny with ur choices daily.



Decision + Action × choices = DESTINY


MEANWHILE...

KARMA WILL FAVOUR U NICELY WITH GOOD REWARDS FOR BEING NICE.


BUT DO NOT FORGET


THERE S FORMULA OF GETTING AHEAD IN THIS LIFE







If I were to tell you how I got most of the things I have In life right now. You would think I have a exclusive audience with Brian Tracy. But, when it comes to finding love, I just prefer not to use trickery. I don't like the idea of manufacturing someone's consent.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by chenzen(m): 12:59pm On Nov 28, 2018
blackjack21:


If I were to tell you how I got most of the things I have In life right now. You would think I have a exclusive audience with Brian Tracy. But, when it comes to finding love, I just prefer not to use trickery. I don't like the idea of manufacturing someone's consent.
pls l beg u. skip that thought of finding love in this country because u wont like what u ll get.


dont say l didnt warn u.
Re: Help! What's Going On In Her Head? by blackjack21(m): 1:05pm On Nov 28, 2018
chenzen:
pls l beg u. skip that thought of finding love in this country because u wont like what u ll get.


dont say l didnt warn u.

There must be someone, somewhere, even in this country. But, if the sea takes me t'nother land, so be it.

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