Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,155,524 members, 7,826,966 topics. Date: Tuesday, 14 May 2024 at 01:18 AM

Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter - Family (3) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter (21282 Views)

Vera Ogbebor: Battle For Child Custody / Battle For Child Custody For A Deceased Friend / Nigerian Man Narrates How His Daughter Chose Him During Custody Battle (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by AFONAMARO: 1:40pm On Jan 27, 2019
Elder0001:



You lack wisdom.

Mr Solomon, you lack courtesy

6 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by ogawisdom(m): 1:40pm On Jan 27, 2019
Elder0001:



You lack wisdom.

U r obviously a kid n far from an elder

6 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by babyfaceafrica: 1:40pm On Jan 27, 2019
Mayangel:
Make peace. That’s your best bet. You just need to change your approach, please note that you cannot be in charge when you are not there. You are not Her husband and you seem to want to enjoy husband perks and authority. You said it yourself that She had a terrible birth experience; you should expect Her to be extra emotional when it comes to Her baby.

Go and visit with your parents if possible, let go of your ego and APOLOGIZE first, then ask for suggestions on ways to ensure peace among the two families for the sake of your baby.
apologize for what?
Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by YoungBlackRico(m): 1:40pm On Jan 27, 2019
Mtcheeew, the only thing I deduced from all these is that you are one irresponsible and arrogant nigga still forming right, you're on a long thing brah and I hope you lose the case if it ever gets to that.

15 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by enemyofprogress: 1:41pm On Jan 27, 2019
EZINNE1759:
cry
wetin? Come make I make you my baby mama
Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by enemyofprogress: 1:41pm On Jan 27, 2019
SUPERPACK:
A pack of condom would have saved you from all this grammar, move on pls
yes o
Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by Sassilicious(f): 1:41pm On Jan 27, 2019
That urhobo dey shout "area" , no mean say they craze o.
They are very very traditional people.
My dear op, face the facts from the beginning. You put this woman in the family way, she went thru a lot during pregnancy ,incurred bills her family paid for, you left her humiliated ,as a baby mama and you want her family to treat you well.
Who will marry this girl now? If it were your sister nko? Let me tell you in plain terms,they dont like you. So they will do any and everything to frustrate you. You cant have peace with this girl or her parents. Forget it. You and ur mom might as well stop going to theirs,because it will only get worse.
Go to court for visitation rights.and then send monthly payments for her upkeep thru bank transfers.
Pls dont even complain about anything this girl or her family does to you.what you did to her was much worse.

18 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by AFONAMARO: 1:41pm On Jan 27, 2019
ogawisdom:


U r obviously a kid n far from an elder

God bless you! Thought I was the only one who noticed

5 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by Lexusgs430: 1:42pm On Jan 27, 2019
ednut1:
even refused to send money cos he sent 2 days ago. I weak for this OP.

Indeed.... It takes a lot to be a daddy....

OP messed up, why did he not draw up a child support package for his child ? Include and exclude all the includeables and excludables ?

He has a massive bridge to build and lots of relationships to mend ........

1 Like

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by DP84: 1:44pm On Jan 27, 2019
This OP is a grown baby with no direction. First off, you aren't married to her and the child's paternity can be disputed from a traditional viewpoint as you are not married to the mother. Your off and on in the child's life, owing to your claim of incessant fights is dumb. You are an Igbo man and you know your own tradition does not recognize a man who has not done the needful on a woman with child.

You are clearly encroaching and trying to see how to lay claim to a baby whose bills you couldn't offset at the hospital. From your narrative, it is obvious her parents and the lady are capable of taking care of the child. I'd say you recognize your place in the child's life as a distant father, do what you can and not make a fuss out of this whole issue.

You have no claims here. You shouldn't even be making plans for a baby you are distant from.

22 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by lilmax(m): 1:45pm On Jan 27, 2019
took my time to read this, this is the first time I'm reading something long like wire on this site

MY ADVICE

guy give up, you don mess up since, you didn't handle it maturely

and tbh? you can't win 100% because they're ready to fight you with everything they have

you have never been really involved, na small small money you dey send,that's why you're feeling entitled

two ways, either you bring down your pride and make peace or you forget about it

see what irresponsibility can cause

babymama ko

13 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by tobie247(m): 1:45pm On Jan 27, 2019
Bro, if you go to the court, u can't get custody of that child. Even if u were legally married to her and are separated, as long as the mother can show proof that she can take care of the child and she's mentally stable, the kid remains with her till a certain age. All u can get is visitation rights.
It's obvious ur babymama is financially capable, her legal team to gonstrong kakaraka.
Btw, I think d fault's been from u right from d start.

4 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by tzoracle: 1:48pm On Jan 27, 2019
faithfull18:
Why do you men always do this, you think the woman isn't good enough for you to marry but she is always good for you to have sex with.


Even if you start a court process, I doubt you will win the case.

From all indications, she can duly take care of the child without your input.

I don't know how to advise you because I don't even support premarital sex to start with.

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by Bright9970: 1:48pm On Jan 27, 2019
Brotherly your child will eventually locate you when the time comes
Exercise patient and let nature do it thing

1 Like

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by Xisnin(m): 1:48pm On Jan 27, 2019
I thought baby mamaism is heavenly made and far better than marriage?

What you are experiencing is resentment for destroying her chances of marriage.
You should have been upfront about your baby mama intentions before impregnating her.

From your writeup, you have no money for prolonged custody battle and given
the age of your daughter and the Nigerian culture, you cannot win the case even
if you try. Even if you do manage to get visitation rights, the woman's family will make
your life a hell.

Go back and beg for forgiveness and hope they accept and give you easy
conditions. Otherwise, forget that you have a daughter until she is an adult.

9 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by toluleke(m): 1:49pm On Jan 27, 2019
eventsmallchops:
just put yourself in her shoe or let's say she's your younger sister? we men need to be considerate atimes , for you to have abandoned her and the child in the toughest time , you need to show remorse.
He just said most of the better part . The child stArted school in April why no go and see things a woman know the child better you should have paid in April and not be adamant na money dey cos issues pass the best is settle legal actions will cause more hatred and beef.

1 Like

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by clairclaret(f): 1:51pm On Jan 27, 2019
with what u said so far can't u see u made no contributions to the upbringing of that girl.moreover I don't tink the girl did anything wrong for u not to marry her...Anambra people like marrying themselves, dey hardly marry other states like imo, abia,Enugu,ebonyi that is Igbo speaking States talk more of delta!! you will hear my mother said I should not marry outside anambra after wasting the girls tym.so nigga sit down and be humble.

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by mamotalk: 1:53pm On Jan 27, 2019
Sir, where did they christen the child? Your house or the mothers place?
Any role you have performed in the life of the child, apart from sending money when demanded? Has the child spent a night under your roof prior this time?
What can you say that really define you as a father but not a visiting daddy?

Set your ego aside and be responsible yo your family

2 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by RiyadhGoddess(f): 1:54pm On Jan 27, 2019
Op you won't win any case if you take it to court.
Her parents are even calm. Entertaining you and your mom into their parlor to see their grand daughter.
Uhm if it were to be my parents, the moment you got their daughter pregnant without marrying her, you do not own the child in the first place talk less of even visiting in the name of I want to see my child. For where? My parents will tell you that you miss road. You no get pikin for this house. You turn person pikin to baby mama Yoruba will say 'Dale moshu' and you expect respect from them.
If na my own house, the moment any man give them belle and the man no gree pay bride price, no be the mam get pikin. Na my parents get the pikin. No court or law fit out rule am.
Go ask my aunty Sade. Her pikin is 10 years now and the man never see the pikin till today. Dem no born the man well make he step into our compound. Since aunty Sade is not fit to be his wife, then he's not fit to be the father of the pikin. Pikin get new papa now sef and knows nothing about the real papa.

My advise is always practice a safe sex to avoid catacata like this...

25 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by faithfull18(f): 1:54pm On Jan 27, 2019
[quote author=tzoracle post=75162535][/quote]
Lol, everyone in your generation is and I am telling you.
Since you weren't trained from home on how to be civil, we will do that here.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by jaxxy(m): 1:55pm On Jan 27, 2019
ogawisdom:
Op u sound foolish

The child is not yours because you didn't marry the girl, u are just a stupid sperm donor, move on already.

If u want the child to be yours then you must first marry the girl like every responsible man does.

If u had married the girl u will now have the impetus to call the baby yours until then the baby is not yours

A child from a relationship isn’t a sperm donor and he has legal rights. He doesn’t have to marry her disrespectful ass to claim pertanity his child. She shud have impregnated herself now.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by Mizwisdom(f): 1:56pm On Jan 27, 2019
You will not get the child, do your worst grin

10 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by Nobody: 1:56pm On Jan 27, 2019
keepingmum:
Your chikd has been supported since birth by her grandparents.
They provide shelter, feeding, clothes and education for her yet you are on a sosha media doing instagram daddy, buying ribena, biscuit and indomie once in 2 years and you think that makes you a daddy??


Whether you are in good terms with the mothet or not, your child will eat everyday, her diapers will be changed everyday, the house will need electricity and she wikk use water to bath, drink , for her clothes to be washed.
She ll need vaccines, coughs and colds which children often contract need to be treated yet you are sitting on your high horse, as a proud anambra man: complaining that they didnt respect you.
Please does respect pay those bills above?

Why didnr you use your highly regarded state respect to pay her delivery bills in hospital? Or use it for her feeding?

Did you take over paying her tuition in the Sept following thr April she started sch since your gross is the timing?

Have you bern supporting financially with bank records to proove it monthly since she was born? Or because the mother didnt dance to your tune as the self crowned Anambra Prince that you are , a child you call your own should starve and be homeless cos daddy aint happy with mummy and her grandparents?

Oga go and see your lawyer ohh, cos you have a long way to go and proof before you ll be considered fit enough for joint physical custody

GOD bless u for this. This op's whole write up sounds more like someone dt does the bare minimum & expects to be applauded for the bare minimum. He even goes weeks and months without communication.

@iloputaife, childcare is a lot more dn what u think. It puts pressure even on husbands & wives. And it's a huge change for new mothers. Do u know how it feels for ur child to need or want sthn & u cant do it? Youve already caused a wound in dt womans heart, dont keep adding salt to it by talking to her harshly.

She couldnt handle the emotional pressure and dts why she had dt outburst the first time. You have now taken offense at this outburst and used it as a backdrop for all ur communication wt her. You need to be empathetic, put urself in her shoes and have a conversation based on love. For her as the mother of ur child, and for ur child. Talk plainly about both of ur past faults, tell her the reason u didnt marry her (be straightforward without judging or insulting her and let her accept ur reason for this) and u should both come up with a plan for ur future relationship. For the sake of ur daughter. You can both do this alone without outside involvement. Difficult conversations must be had.

11 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by samsam2019: 1:56pm On Jan 27, 2019
If I were you I would forget the child. What nonsense
Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by davidwoodworker: 1:56pm On Jan 27, 2019
Hello Buddy.
Please contact me in private. I have been through similar experience recently. Am afraid some shallow minded individuals won't understand the depth of your pains. raacartplus@yahoo.com

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by Melian(f): 1:57pm On Jan 27, 2019
NevetsIbot:


What nonsense are you spewing here. the thread is about a man who wants to see his child and has been denied of that right and you are here talking about the only thing your tiny feminist mind can process.

Aunty!! Dating might or may not lead to marriage... Get that into your dull brain.

Op sir... If someone was withholding me from seeing my own baby girl.. I'd rain hell on her and her family. Go the legal way and make them bend!!!!

You will do nothing!!! You didn't carry the pregnancy for nine months so you know nothing about having a child. You immature men want to eat your cake and have it. You want the baby but not the woman. Selfish lot.

14 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by Vcent50: 1:59pm On Jan 27, 2019
Op go and listen to oh my son by lucky dube, the song will enlighten you more,
Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by Macgreat(m): 1:59pm On Jan 27, 2019
You should have known you are the only person with integrity here. when dealing with these kind of people. I collect what you came for before giving.



sorry for your case.
Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by Nobody: 2:02pm On Jan 27, 2019
This kind story dey make prick fear toto

2 Likes

Re: Impending Child Custody Battle: Baby Mama Preventing Access To My Daughter by tzoracle: 2:02pm On Jan 27, 2019
faithfull18:


Lol, everyone in your generation is and I am telling you.

Since you weren't trained from home on how to be civil, we will do that here.


Train your IQ first to comprehend before you look for who to train

2 Likes 1 Share

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (Reply)

Marriage Is Not About Unconditional Love / I'm Confused: My Wife's Pressuring Us To Relocate To Another Apartment!!!!! / Divorce Settlement And Child-Support Be Introduced In Nigeria?

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 48
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.