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Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. - Romance (2) - Nairaland

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Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Raydans: 10:29pm On May 22, 2019
luminouz:

U were making sense till I got to the 'sit her down and talk to her part' and u lost it. I dislike that quoted above,u lots think women are some underdeveloped cretins who have no sense yet u continue being fooled by them. They are not as weak as u think. She knew already she goofed and should be disciplined,yet u advocate throwing a party for her? With which money o? Urs or hers or the business's? For me,no party anything,maybe a small gift and I will let her know the capital is the cause of that. That I need the capital back to boost my own business. That way,u teach her that business is business and defaults have consequences. She will get that money back(if she was sincere in the first place) and work harder to gain ur trust. That's how to teach discipline, not sitting her down after some birthday party issh...she might not see the seriousness of ur so-called financial lecture! undecided

Such treatment would have been perfect for a normal girl which the op has no plan for. Like the common kinda dating. He might not even throw a party talkless of gifts

He stated that she did well with business and it yielded good returns. Some girls would have lavished the capital on frivolities to start with without doing anything

He also particularly stated that he really loved the girl and would like to settle down with her. If it is true then such strict measures is not logically applicable in this case.

Afterall I did not negate the fact that the op has to get his capital back to maintain business discipline
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Sanchez01: 10:51pm On May 22, 2019
Godoverevery:
Hi everyone.... just need your veiw if am doing the right thing.
I started dating my current gf last December and it have been alot of up and few down........what really happened was Wen we met she just lost her job so I felt like helping her out so I came up with the idea of her doing a business of her own were we can both benefit....so one of my friend gave me a link to were she can pick perfumes ,body spray and female slippers in bulk at cheap prices and resale since she knows lot of people due to her friendly nature.
After discussing with her and she accepted so I sent her 100k around feburary ds year to start and got her a new phone has well cos d one she was using was bad so she can also advertise online.....sales was good according to her........fast forward to April
I just felt like knowing if she was keeping the money in her account as she Claimed so i asked her to come give account of the sales cos I told her we will share the gains between ourselves becos i didn't want her to lose track and be financially reackless ........she did the account and it good sales......i now asked her to send me the capital back...to my surprise
She said she sorry that her dad was in need of cash and was depressed so she borrow him 80k out of the money......I was really angry cos she didn't tell me before doing it so alot of drama happened..... after begging she said her dad will give her back d cash ending of last month...... ending came she started begging again dat I should give her till mid this month.....last week she started begging again I should give her till ending of D's month.

Ds were I need you guys help.....I love the gal if God permit I want to marry her.
Her birthday is on Friday and I av plans of celebrating it on Sunday with few friends at a nice lounge....(get cake, wristwatch with set of nice panties has gift).
But has I was making order for the wristwatch D's afternoon at work something in me just ask if am sure am doing the right thing and ever since I am really thinking I should just cancel the plan.... because what she did with the business money really hurt and I find it difficult to trust her.

Pls am I doing the right thing celebrating her birthday or I should just cancel it....thanks
The Summary of your post

1. She is more of a business partner than a girlfriend. You thought to establish her because you feel you could benefit from it...
2. So you probably suggested or sold the idea of how the profit would be shared...she agreed and you lent her a 100k.
3. You automatically took control of a supposed adult by asking her to audit/give account of her sales journey because you feel she is answerable to you and needed to guide her so as not to misappropriate or spend recklessly, according to you.
4. You made it known that you'd both share her profit, being the financier. Issokay.
4. She failed to remit the capital as agreed despite good, theoretical sales...
5. Supposedly, she failed to remit the capital on the agreed time/month/date because she, according to her, used a reasonable part of the money on her dad.
6. You got angry because you felt you should have been in the know on how she spends the business money. I guess you made it known that she must return the capital and has failed to do so, month after month.
7. For the record, it doesn't really bother you that the money is spent on family. You are more concerned about how she spends and you being in the know...
8. Presently, you are nursing the idea of not going through with the plans you have for her birthday because you feel she didn't handle the business fund properly.

Let me overanalyze your case

1. It was noble you assisted your 'girlfriend' but what you guys have here isn't a romantic relationship. Money is in the way already and nothing would make sense given the impression on ground.

2. Your girlfriend isn't really your girlfriend but a business partner. Why you thought to 'help' her is because you thought it would 'benefit the both you'. By benefit, it means you collecting a part of her profit, beyond the capital you lent her. This is nothing but an investment with eyes on ROI. You could have stopped at the capital but you clearly didn't think you have a special kind of relationship with this person and even if you don't owe her a thing, seeing her do well in whatever she settles for should be your priority.

3. The capital isn't in sight from the looks of it. You made a mistake already and she hasn't done well on her part. Whether or not she spent the money on her dad isn't the issue, I'm sure she wouldn't have acted the way she did if the money was a loan from a financial organization.

4. Requesting for your capital and part of her profit is you being a loan shark. If your mind doesn't release the money to her, by all means get your capital but don't go beyond that.

5. I'd advise you celebrate your girlfriend and not your business partner. You of all person know whether or not she has been a good girl (not business partner). Don't judge her from the business angle. Take her out and celebrate her.

Seeing that she reinvests is key.
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by luminouz(m): 12:11am On May 23, 2019
Sanchez01:

The Summary of your post

1. She is more of a business partner than a girlfriend. You thought to establish her because you feel you could benefit from it...
2. So you probably suggested or sold the idea of how the profit would be shared...she agreed and you lent her a 100k.
3. You automatically took control of a supposed adult by asking her to audit/give account of her sales journey because you feel she is answerable to you and needed to guide her so as not to misappropriate or spend recklessly, according to you.
4. You made it known that you'd both share her profit, being the financier. Issokay.
4. She failed to remit the capital as agreed despite good, theoretical sales...
5. Supposedly, she failed to remit the capital on the agreed time/month/date because she, according to her, used a reasonable part of the money on her dad.
6. You got angry because you felt you should have been in the know on how she spends the business money. I guess you made it known that she must return the capital and has failed to do so, month after month.
7. For the record, it doesn't really bother you that the money is spent on family. You are more concerned about how she spends and you being in the know...
8. Presently, you are nursing the idea of not going through with the plans you have for her birthday because you feel she didn't handle the business fund properly.

Let me overanalyze your case

1. It was noble you assisted your 'girlfriend' but what you guys have here isn't a romantic relationship. Money is in the way already and nothing would make sense given the impression on ground.

2. Your girlfriend isn't really your girlfriend but a business partner. Why you thought to 'help' her is because you thought it would 'benefit the both you'. By benefit, it means you collecting a part of her profit, beyond the capital you lent her. This is nothing but an investment with eyes on ROI. You could have stopped at the capital but you clearly didn't think you have a special kind of relationship with this person and even if you don't owe her a thing, seeing her do well in whatever she settles for should be your priority.

3. The capital isn't in sight from the looks of it. You made a mistake already and she hasn't done well on her part. Whether or not she spent the money on her dad isn't the issue, I'm sure she wouldn't have acted the way she did if the money was a loan from a financial organization.

4. Requesting for your capital and part of her profit is you being a loan shark. If your mind doesn't release the money to her, by all means get your capital but don't go beyond that.

5. I'd advise you celebrate your girlfriend and not your business partner. You of all person know whether or not she has been a good girl (not business partner). Don't judge her from the business angle. Take her out and celebrate her.

Seeing that she reinvests is key.
U said a lot of things but sadly you wasted all ur efforts cuz I still dont even know what u on about!!!!
I can have a gf and still have her as my biz partner,what is wrong in that...u kept on about the dichotomy between the two and I wondered what's wrong in trying to help ur gf and teaching her some biznez sense? U called him a loan shark,cuz he wanted some of the profits? I'd have done the same thing...to keep her on her toes!!! I provided the capital and even though I dont need part of the profits,collecting some of it is basic biznez training ethics which states that an agreement is an agreement. I could even send her the money back or use it to buy stuffs for her but essentially I'm teaching her biznez wise to be tough and hardworking.
Apart from all that, OP wants to marry the babe so seeing that she is not a spendthrift is a good test too.
My stand is clear, let her return that money ASAP and stick to the biznez end. Being my gf is outside our biznez. One doesn't succeed in biznez with sentiments and emotions.if OP never staked her,where will she get the money to borrow her dad? N why borrow the capital and not their profits?? No astute biznezwoman messes with her CAPITAL!!! NEVER!!! WITHOUT IT,THE BIZNEZ IS DEAD!!!

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Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Filmewell(f): 3:48am On May 23, 2019
[quote author=Godoverevery post=78631052]
So what if I truly love her......do I know if she truly love me back or if she would have done same for me if table were turned.....Dat wat I don't like about most ladies always looking at things only from there angle......See most times I put love aside and I use my head becos one idiot have once told me is it love she will eat Wen I was still trying to get a job after my service year.[/quote

How did you read this and miss the topic sentence. Is not about love. The first paragraph is about being logical, using your head. I asked you if you were in her shoes, will you do what she did with the money. If she was telling the truth that she gave the money to her father who needs it, will you do the same if it is your decision to make.or do you think she had other alternatives yet was stupid enough to use her capital.

That part about love is for you that was talking about loving her and what not. I don't even believe in love, is love is just a decent for humans to propagate. Otherwise, I don't see reason why one person will fall in and out of love in a twinkle of an eye.
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Godoverevery: 4:18am On May 23, 2019
[quote author=Filmewell post=78634192][/quote]
ok ma........but true love do exist you can take it to the bank anyday anytime....I av been in more than 10 relationship both serious and unserious.....But the only issh I av realize over time is we actually dont love those who love us genuinely cos most times they don't come in the package we like and D's happens on both sides..... Only on few cases the feelings and effort is mutual.
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Samyj247: 9:54am On May 23, 2019
Godoverevery:
Yea she a good girl.
should i also get the gift don't want the love to enter her head and she start misbehaving.....cos she said non of her ex av done something like D's for her.
lols she is comparing u with her ex, when a higher bidder performs better than u financially, u will become an ex. good luck to u. I am expecting ur story online next time but please don't change ur Monika so we will know its u lols.

then she will be like " just small money u borrow me u no allow me rest....see this guy now dash me 200k for free. if u want I go pay u ur money times 2 sef.

alert us when part two comes out.

1 Like

Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by mhizdebbygold(f): 10:02am On May 23, 2019
Godoverevery:
Yea she a good girl.
should i also get the gift don't want the love to enter her head and she start misbehaving.....cos she said non of her ex av done something like D's for her.
Get her a gift but most times reduce the love you show her women can misbehave if u show them too much love

1 Like

Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Godoverevery: 10:41am On May 23, 2019
mhizdebbygold:

Get her a gift but most times reduce the love you show her women can misbehave if u show them too much love
thanks ma...... should i also go on with the plans for the party.
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Nobody: 11:24am On May 23, 2019
Godoverevery:
thanks ma...... should i also go on with the plans for the party.
Don't fucking go on with any party.

1 Like

Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by mhizdebbygold(f): 8:42am On May 24, 2019
Godoverevery:
thanks ma...... should i also go on with the plans for the party.
Yeah sure... I guess today is d day, u said Friday right?
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Godoverevery: 8:19am On May 27, 2019
mhizdebbygold:

Yeah sure... I guess today is d day, u said Friday right?
Yes ma did the celebration yesterday.....
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Godoverevery: 9:45am On May 27, 2019
Just want to say a big thank you to very who helped me with the advisement .....I followed the majority advise and celebrated her birthday with love from friends...it was nice to see her happy with lovely smiles.......Love lead the way.
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by mhizdebbygold(f): 10:17am On May 27, 2019
Godoverevery:
Yes ma did the celebration yesterday.....

This is nice...and your girl is beautiful.
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by izaray(f): 1:48pm On May 27, 2019
She's beautiful, please keep ur relationship tight not everyone is good at handling a business. If I have such good business ideas, i won't've allowed my money to be used by banks to enrich themselves na.

Enjoy ur relationship while it last
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by jbblues24(m): 11:54pm On May 28, 2019
I see trees of green........ red roses too I see em bloom..... for me and for you And I think to myself.... what a wonderful world.
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by umarwy(m): 2:50am On Jun 18, 2019
Samyj247:
lols she is comparing u with her ex, when a higher bidder performs better than u financially, u will become an ex. good luck to u. I am expecting ur story online next time but please don't change ur Monika so we will know its u lols.

then she will be like " just small money u borrow me u no allow me rest....see this guy now dash me 200k for free. if u want I go pay u ur money times 2 sef.

alert us when part two comes out.


https://www.nairaland.com/5248062/should-get-fiancee-arrested
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Jollof123: 11:03am On Jun 18, 2019
Samyj247:
lols she is comparing u with her ex, when a higher bidder performs better than u financially, u will become an ex. good luck to u. I am expecting ur story online next time but please don't change ur Monika so we will know its u lols.

then she will be like " just small money u borrow me u no allow me rest....see this guy now dash me 200k for free. if u want I go pay u ur money times 2 sef.

alert us when part two comes out.

Lol...wizard, part two is out already oooo. Grab your copy nowwww.
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Blessing97(m): 11:57am On Jun 18, 2019
Samyj247:
lols she is comparing u with her ex, when a higher bidder performs better than u financially, u will become an ex. good luck to u. I am expecting ur story online next time but please don't change ur Monika so we will know its u lols.

then she will be like " just small money u borrow me u no allow me rest....see this guy now dash me 200k for free. if u want I go pay u ur money times 2 sef.

alert us when part two comes out.
You are the best prophet on NL. And your prophecy has come to pass. Part 2 is out now grin grin grin
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Samyj247: 10:19pm On Jun 18, 2019
Jollof123:


Lol...wizard, part two is out already oooo. Grab your copy nowwww.
lols...winch, u don see am na
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Jollof123: 11:40pm On Jun 18, 2019
Samyj247:
lols...winch, u don see am na

Mr Gandalf....wizard of the 9th senate..Lols...I don see am oo

1 Like

Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Fragility6: 2:22pm On Jul 28, 2019
JasonScoolari:
Celebrate her like never before. To see better girls these days hard pass Nigeria Economy.

Goodluck bro!
So you are supporting mediocrity?
Re: Need To Know If Am Doing The Right In A 6 month Old Relationship. by Godoverevery: 9:06am On Jul 30, 2019
[quote author=Filmewell post=78634192][/quote]
so she got no alternative than give her dad d money without prescription informing me.....if table were turned I won't be that stupid to give out my capital and my dad has integrity and class he won't ask me for that.

Anyway am done with her and am happy she is learning life now.......Even her parents aiin't ready to set her up in a business.

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