bebe2007:

Am taking another dimension here. If your babe cheats on you there is obviously a reason. Stay and find out what you are doing wrong and learn to correct your mistake. she probably would not do it again if you correct your mistake.

If your boyfriend cheats on you he obviously has no reason to do so.LOL just being a dog that he is anyway.

Seriously, i would want to know why he did it probably am doing something wrong.Sometimes its true, you are probably in the wrong. BUT MOSTLY ITS NOT YOUR FAULT.

Thus said, for most guys, cheating is physical.

But for most girls that cheat, it's an emotional thing.

Your babe will hardly screw another guy because she got aroused and couldn't control it. If she does, then your dating a prostitute (only she don't do it for the money). For girls, its deeper than physical.

luxoire:

Truse said!!, for most guys, CHEATING IS PHYSICAL

BUT FOR MOST GIRLS THAT CHEAT, IT IS AN EMOTIONAL THING,

your babe will hardly screw another guy because she got aroused and couldn't control it. If she does, then your dating a protitute (only she don't do it for the money). For girls, its deeper than physical.

Now u know the reason for the double standards u was so quick to mention.
For a guy to cheat it is no thing (to him), but a girl literally invests in it emotionally and passionately and that can be painful.

This seems to be anti-masculine girls-only forum. Not by the topic but by the posts and yes I noticed a few guys around.

With all the noise about how much guys cheat i have come to wonder, who do they cheat with - other guys? Hell no. So guys may just cheat as much as girls. Please dont turn this forum into a campaign against guys by your posts.

Anyway concerning the topic. If she cheats its over and i expect thesame the other way around, only that I dont cheat.

Adetife:

Now u know the reason for the double standards u was so quick to mention.
For a guy to cheat it is no thing (to him), but a girl literally invests in it emotionally and passionately and that can be painful.

@Adetife, double standards exist when both can be judged in same light, yet one side is easily 'forgiven' because of their genetic inheritance.

And yes, whilst i i mentioned that Most guys cheat physically, it is not a reason for them to use genetics as an excuse, but when girls do it, it is not genetics, they are branded.

Human beings are human beings, and though they might cheat for different reasons, if a girl is going to be called slut and made to feel ashamed for cheating, then a guy too should be made to feel same way, and not 'excused' by society because he is a man, and genetically he is 'programmed' to cheat

you guys are still on this?

ok lemme ask, if you find out that the guy/girl is cheating
what next?
leave her/him?
what is the gurantee that the next person wont be worse?

just asking

@viee, it depends, i am not one of those people that advocate leaving someone in the first isnstance because they cheat (unless they are a compulsive cheat)

If your guy cheats on u, and u turly believe its a one off, and he loves u and respects u in anyother way (just as long as he didnt cheat 'close-to-home') i would say give him one last chance, if he does it again, he knows the door!!, However if u don't think his apology is genuine and/or he will do it, then leave his first time round

If it is your hubby, stay for as long as u humanly can (without becoming a door-mat) and try and work things out

personally, I CAN TOLERATE A GUY WHO CHEATED 'AWAY-FROM-HOME', BUT A GUY WHO CHEATS ON ME, WITH MY FRIEND, SISTERS, MEMBERS OF MY FAMILY, NO WAY (not even a second chance-but thats my prejudice)

now i can live with this.

hurts though when a partner cheats
it could drive some people can even be think of suicide or murder

my own prayer is:
God plz dont give me someone that will cheat
as temptation goes, if he gets to cheat,lemme not find out, if i find out give me the heart to take a good decision|

i pray more for the first two though

@viee, i see where u are coming from!!

Why should i bother my head with issues like this.
I know of a surety that my partner cant cheat on me.
And if he does i pray i dont find out and that god gives me the heart to make good and fruitful decision.

I don't need to know if my man is cheating on me because curiosity kills the cat. However I trust him 101% he isn't going to cheat so why bother myself with all this nonsense.

I'm a man, not a rabbit. I detest the idea that men cannot control themselves when they feel aroused.

Women desperately want to believe that the men cheating on them really love them deep down. How pathetic.

luxoire:

Thus said, for most guys, cheating is physical.

But for most girls that cheat, it's an emotional thing.

Your babe will hardly screw another guy because she got aroused and couldn't control it. If she does, then your dating a prostitute (only she don't do it for the money). For girls, its deeper than physical.

How can you say that for dudes cheating is only a physical thing are we animals that act on only impulse?. There has to be love/lust (emotion), attraction(emotion). I want to know if she's cheating on me so i can get rid of the bitch and get a newer model!. But she won't cheat why? because she's one lucky girl because there are not many men like me out there!

i'll really like to know

I would definitely want to know so I can kick his behind to the curb

u see, as long as u also don't expect her to stay with u if u cheat on her, then i'm cool with your reaction (because most of u guys have double standards, IT'S OK FOR THE GUY TO CHEAT, BUT NOT THE GIRL, because then the guys get all hot n' bothered about it)

Of course not, don't mean i won't try n talk her into staying thou.

is right that what you dont know cant hurt you. But I would like to know if he is cheating so i can know my options and make a chioce

I really want to know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!So i can run as if the whole world is chasing me n besides knw the reason why he's doing dat

IF I CAN'T/WON'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT, THEN I REALLY DON'T WANT TO KNOW ABOUT IT.
ON THE OTHER HAND IF I STAND UP TO THE CHALLENGE OF DUMPING AND FORGETING HIM/HER KNOWING I DESERVE TO BE TREATED BETTER.

damn, it would be doing me a big favour knowing if my gal is cheating or not, den i'd hav 2 leave her. cant stand my woman cheating cos i always try 2 be there so she doesnt hav a reason 2w cheat.

A cheating partner i cannot stand. I dont cheat and dont expect to be cheated upon. Its quite unfurtunate. God made a man and a woman. How can we humans now have extra? Well, its a worldwide phenomenon. But its better to be honest in a relationship sha! It will hurt if i find out but i will like to know the reason why am being cheated upon and sort the problem out if possible if not then i end the relationship. PERIOD!!!!!!!!!!!!! PEACE.

, of course i would, and i wouldn't even play nice.

Before it gets to being a partner, I would like to know everything. Any sense of it, there will be no partner. She can lie all she wants, but she can't fake a lie. It will be like I never met her. If you don't look both ways before crossing the road, you know what can happen.

Why take the risk of not looking?

Yes i would want to know and why - Then she's gone!!!

I would rather not know. Yes. I am one of those people who believe that what you don't know won't hurt you!! Why give your self a heart attack? Not that I think my husband will cheat. But if he will cheat he will so why trouble myself. I've even made jokes to use a condom if he did. Am I from Mars?

You have to ask yourself what you will do with the information or why you want it. Are you going to act on it or just store it? If you want out of the marriage, maybe you need to find an excuse but if not why make your self ill.

Just my opinion!!

i think i will prefer to know so dat i dont keep wasting my precious time and attention on the guy.

i think it will nice to know if ur partner is cheating on u. If you find out s/he is cheating on you, you try to find out why s/he does that. The fault might even be from you. some ladies on getting married feels they hv arrived and forget to keep those things that attracted them to their spouse. This might make the man start looking outside. I believe it is better to know than keep living in a fools paradise.

:-x :-x

If you are in an ordinary relationship then it is easy to cut your loses and move on. If you are in a long term marriage, have children, properties and business together, it is not that easy to just pack and go. What next? While I will not condone infidelity, I will not throw away a stable long marriage just becasue of a fling. Infact I will be more worried about catching a disease. While my husband has never cheated (to my knowledge) men will be men especially Nigerian men. They don't do it becasue they are not getting it right at home or for any other tangible reason. They just do it for the sake of it.

hey whats wrong with a guy having love by the side? is that cheating.
              ME CALL THAT INSURANCE IN CASE OF EMERGENCY.

When I was dating I truly believed that those who expect a 100% exclusive relationship as boyfriends or girl friends are jokers.
I believed as far as you are not married you are a free agent.
I was never into that jealousy thing and as far as a babe did not disrespect me by sleeping around anyhow or with people I know, as far as she was there for me and was loving , fun to be with. I no send what you do behind my back.
The only time I ever bothered was when I knew I was truly in love ,then the jealousy bit became uncontrollable.
If I found out a girl slept(with another guy) I would calmly bring it up one day, and from that day I would have the advantage in the relationship.For one the babe has lost policing rights on me and would always be confused what would happen next so a charm offensive to win forgiveness would start.
You may wonder why I would have such a cynical view. EXPERIENCE.
I always had a lot of female friends in University who were close to me.I got know that most of them almost always were dating more than one person for different reasons.One is the guy for a good sex,another gives the cash,another mister funny guy to make them feel good etc.
Also if they live in Lagos and school in Abuja, one guy in school ,another in Lagos.
So I made up my mind it was a total waste of time bothering about what you can't see.
Before the ladies will kill me let me say the[b] guys are worse than this.[/b]
Till this day I do not know any guy who is single that has only one woman.Even many of the married ones.
So if some one is not your wife or husband,no kill yourself.Them go always do and swear it can never happen.