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What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? - Jobs/Vacancies (13) - Nairaland

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What Is The Highest Salary You Have Ever Received / What's The Worst Pay You Have Ever Received As A Writer? / Should He Accept The Job Offer As A University Graduate? Pls Advice Needed (2) (3) (4)

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Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by PrincessB1(f): 8:20am On Jul 17, 2019
OhiOfIhima:

Hi Darling Ami..
wesicall ami seve keh
I might have been busy at work. Asuku'ayi
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by LordAdam16: 8:23am On Jul 17, 2019
hopefulLandlord:

I think people would do that. the main issue is that the extra profit gained from such would simply be used to line the pockets of some executives or shareholders

And as I said earlier: if you really think so, put your money where your mouth is.

-Lord
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by jamesfadairo(m): 9:18am On Jul 17, 2019
MubarakMukhtar:
Please are you guys serious about what you are saying cox it's really panicking and terrible, am just a fresh graduate waiting for service, my mind always telling me that I will be posted to federal government institution for ppa where after my successful service year they wouldn't hesitate to retain me be their temporary worker b4 being parmanented, definitely my salary going to start like somewhere from 120k above per month.





To me own surprise am here seeing 800 2k and highest 18k per month as personal salary.
What a shock? Was it am ambitious ����

may God grant your wishes, but about this retaining of a thing, only very very few are retained especially in a federal government job, maybe about 1% . Just start planning and praying towards your ex nysc days, it's not easy

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by xrayz(m): 10:02am On Jul 17, 2019
LordAdam16:


See this too many times, that maybe it's necessary to set the record straight.

Factory and warehouse jobs the world over are terrible. Go read accounts about minimum-wage workers in Amazon processing centers who have to pee in bottles to save time. That's a company with a $990b market cap.

This also explains why automation is seeing rapid growth in that sector, with the hope that the factories and warehouses of the future will not employ humans.

The question really is would you or anyone you know buy cabin biscuit for N40 apiece to help provide the "humane" working conditions you hastily propose for the factory workers? Or isn't this just the ironic conundrum that those who decry conditions regarded as representative of modern slavery are often the most price-conscious consumers.

Same individuals who'd go to a local eatery (commonly called mama put) and want a large serve of rice, beans, plantain, two large-sized cuts of meat all for less than $1 if possible. And then when they're told the worker is paid less than 10k monthly after "slaving" from 6 to 6, they begin fuming like they've ever tipped or make it a point to pay excess.

If you think you can run a factory that pays much better, gives lots of breaks, paid vacations, even maternity/paternity leave to low-skilled workers; while simultaneously offering low market price or even better undercutting the competition, paying off your double-digit loans timely, and providing double-digit returns to investors and shareholders; please write a business plan and I can guarantee you you'd become a billionaire in 5 years as capital will find you instead of the other way around.

Gala has been sold at 50 naira for over 10 years. In that same time minimum wage has risen from 9800 to 30000, and NGN/USD rate has risen from 100/$ to 360/$. Now if UAC says they want to increase the price to 150 to match the wage and rate increase; how many of you would buy?

This is the type of economic illiteracy that leads to the election of nutjobs like Buhari and AOC.

There's no emotion in the jungle or the real world. Employers do not just arbitrarily choose what to pay workers, the market determines what to pay workers.

That is why entry doctors in Nigeria earn $6000 while their mates in the US earn 6 figures. The difference however is that while childbirth by CS in Nigeria stays below $800 in total; in the US, it goes for about or over $10k (you can check the giving birth thread on NL). In fact, a woman was quoted $877,000 after having triplets. Heart transplants can reach 7 figures.

I'd like to see people proffer solutions on how to address wage inequality without the emotional-laden diatribes. That last bit disgusts me!
Bros I'm gonna take u on this.you mentioned gala, have you taken ur time to check the quantity and quality of gala now compare to d period u quoted? UAC adjusted both in quality and quantity to meet up with all the economic changes u mentioned and that is d smartest move rather than tampering with price which will be very obvious and counter productive.(2) Nigeria runs an open market (capital economy) that is to say, producers in often times decide what to produce, how to produce it when and where to produce it even for who to produce it hence they also determines who to employ.This simply means that once a producer have a target on production quantity in a period of time with profit inclusive, there is every tendency he will maximise it, now tell me sir, what stops such producer to pay his workers well since those are all captured in every production plan?remember there is no limit to d sales and profit he will make (forget about d profit in unit price, concentrate on demand).modern slavery is when we believe that unskilled labourers has nothing to offer in production line hence they are poorly treated but in a country like nigeria where humans do almost all d odd jobs, we should have a rethink.

xrayz
-Lord

1 Like

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by hopefulLandlord: 10:08am On Jul 17, 2019
LordAdam16:


And as I said earlier: if you really think so, put your money where your mouth is.

-Lord

I just fail to see how paying extra for products would lead to workers getting paid more in a capitalist society. it would most likely work in a communist/socialist one though.

6 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by chizidgreat(m): 10:49am On Jul 17, 2019
Mine was last year in Port Harcourt o.
Finished my NYSC and needed an 'office' work to add to my little hustling.
Then, after submitting my CV in different schools and companies, I submitted to a security company too.
Omo, they called me immediately and training began, both lectures and practical training and punishments from soldier.
Then, after training, they told me what to submit, about 13 documents including an affidavit and two guarantor forms (you know why I'm telling you all these? Cos they say the pay ranges from 10k to 15k and son of man is submitting documents upon documents)
Well, I submitted, wrote exams and passed elegantly and waited to be called.
They did not call oh. Until later, I got another text from them to come for training.
I went back and explained that I have attended all the training and am waiting for job
They said they know but it's how they do it, they, that I will keep coming for training until there's an opening.
I looked at my NYSC certificate, looked at my beautifully Senate endorsed 2.1 certificate from UNN, looked at the innocent me that wants to do security work, checked my pocket and how much I spend from Agip to D- Line any day I go for training, looked at the thin old Akwaibom man at the reception; saluted him and the office and left.
Back home, I packed and left Port Harcourt for them, went back to Enugu and picked a M.Sc form
I'm happy to be back to school now sad
And security company is still sending message to their chi till today to come for training.
Mtcheeew

20 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Amyyy2020: 1:10pm On Jul 17, 2019
chizidgreat:
Mine was last year in Port Harcourt o.
Finished my NYSC and needed an 'office' work to add to my little hustling.
Then, after submitting my CV in different schools and companies, I submitted to a security company too.
Omo, they called me immediately and training began, both lectures and practical training and punishments from soldier.
Then, after training, they told me what to submit, about 13 documents including an affidavit and two guarantor forms (you know why I'm telling you all these? Cos they say the pay ranges from 10k to 15k and son of man is submitting documents upon documents)
Well, I submitted, wrote exams and passed elegantly and waited to be called.
They did not call oh. Until later, I got another text from them to come for training.
I went back and explained that I have attended all the training and am waiting for job
They said they know but it's how they do it, they, that I will keep coming for training until there's an opening.
I looked at my NYSC certificate, looked at my beautifully Senate endorsed 2.1 certificate from UNN, looked at the innocent me that wants to do security work, checked my pocket and how much I spend from Agip to D- Line any day I go for training, looked at the thin old Akwaibom man at the reception; saluted him and the office and left.
Back home, I packed and left Port Harcourt for them, went back to Enugu and picked a M.Sc form
I'm happy to be back to school now *sad
And security company is still sending message to their chi till today to come for training* .
Mtcheeew
grin angry
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Jalo60(m): 2:46pm On Jul 17, 2019
It enlightens us who are about to join the hustles.
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by LordAdam16: 3:33pm On Jul 17, 2019
hopefulLandlord:


I just fail to see how paying extra for products would lead to workers getting paid more in a capitalist society. it would most likely work in a communist/socialist one though.

Go check out the average wage of tech workers in Shenzhen, China over the last 10 years while prices of tech products have simultaneously gone through the roof.

This is rudimentary economics. Not simply theory but observable fact.

If paying more for products didn't lead to workers getting paid more in a capitalist society; wages would still be stuck in 1960. So when you say you fail to see how it happens, you're simply saying you're blind to inflation. In simple terms, the constant YoY rise in the prices of goods and services is measured as inflation which necessitates the periodic increase of wages.

The primary reason why warehouse workers work for around $10-$15/hr in the US and less than $1/hr in Nigeria is the price of products.

-Lord
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Celebsnews: 8:17pm On Jul 17, 2019
luckygeee:
Have lots of crazy job experience but let me start with this one. After my secondary School in 2002 I had to get a teaching job while writing jamb. It was a new school made of plank and zinc. The owner told me my pay would be 1k a month. As a young boy that had never earned my own money before, I took the job and had to teach little children and even carry most of them to their homes. Month end I was paid my 1k and I felt quite happy. Got home checked my pocket but couldn't find the note. Lost it on my way home. I felt really bad and downcast. Remembering those days and how far God has brought me, I only give glory to God

grin grin I don laugh tire. Chai Meanwhile, meet the three hottest couple in Bbnaija 2019
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHNn3Bk9-Go
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by dedons: 9:44pm On Jul 17, 2019
PrincessB1:
Cash please grin
OK o. send your account details.
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by PrincessB1(f): 12:15am On Jul 18, 2019
dedons:
OK o. send your account details.
2222937 mountain bank tongue
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by alabi484(m): 12:22am On Jul 18, 2019
dannybrasky:

Back then in Bariga after secondary school,did waec and was waiting for result . As a born hustler,I would do any legit job to make sure I have my own little cash at hand. Name it, any hard job,omo boy was always ready lol.

I tried hard but couldn't get something to do until a friend of mine asked if I would work as a sand lifter with basket from the lagoon at bariga. Mehn I was do danm happy like yaay I have finally gotten myself a gig lol,but guys I was wrong as what I saw wasn't what I expected grin

Got to the lagoon down down after king sunny Ade's house,can't remember the name of the street. From the lagoon you can clearly see third mainland bridge.

Oh b4 I forget,being overwhelmed with happiness I didn't bother asking what the pay was like. Fast forward got to the lagoon,saw some giant well chiseled bros them, going into the lagoon with basket to park sand and then bring it to the shores of the lagoon. As a strong omo boy I was still like no shaking I go chop this job for breakfast easy pizzy lol.

Then came the shocker, there was this bros that was suppose to direct me on how to go about it,his name is Egbon Mufu. I asked some of the guys at the shore pls I'm asking for egbon Mufu,and then one pointed me at a direction and said there he is. Egbon Mufu was just coming out of the water with heavy basket of sand looking huge and well chiseled like a Greek god. I watched the way he struggled a bit to find his way to
shore in order for him to dump the sand he got from the lagoon.

He dumped the sand, stood there and was breathing heavily. And then one of the guys called him to inform him I was looking for him. NOTE, egbon Mufu was backing us when he was called upon,reacting to the call egbon couldn't turn his neck he had to turn his whole body cos his neck has already gotten stiff due to the pressure from the heavy basket of sand he carried couple with latic acid burning. In my mind I was like wtf,na so I won take die? Na so my neck go come break grin We concluded on how I would go about the job,he told me to pull of my clothes as I have to work with boxers alone lol. Me wey be say as soon as I saw the neck issue I already made up my mind to salo lol. Na so I tell am say I no wear pant say make I go buy boxers to wear grin He then replied saying eat b4 u come back o,I say no wahala egbon. If I'm to ever see egbon Mufu again that would be today grin I jejely went back home to hug my bed grin grin grin Too young to die grin

Lmfao..I can't piss for body with laugh biko
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by dedons: 9:22am On Jul 18, 2019
PrincessB1:
2222937 mountain bank tongue
sent

1 Like

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by dannybrasky(m): 9:30am On Jul 18, 2019
grin
alabi484:


Lmfao..I can't piss for body with laugh biko
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by ChristineC: 10:18am On Jul 18, 2019
martinskelly:
O boy see people experience 4 job matter, e no funny o!

Mine was in 2013 after my NYSC in kwara, i decided to call my dad friends wife who happens to be working with fed ministry of foreign affairs in Abuja,

Me: ma I'm through with my service
Madam: Oya start coming to Abuja,i think u know kubwa
Me: Not really coz i have never been to Abuja no to talk of kubwa
Madam: OK don't worry i will send u address
Me: Alright ma.
She sent me address after two days of our conversation, Boom! The next day i boarded a bus going to Abuja from iyana ipaja with joy in my heart say "i wan go work for ministry" .
The quantum of joy i experience during the journey cannot be measured even if you use tape rule lol!
I said to myself if na die we go die there together shebi na Abuja i must make am(well it was my first time of entering Abuja don't blame me though).
I got to Abuja(Zubwa) around 11:30pm that night but i no fear say na night we dey because i just don't know where i got the strength from, anyways i decide to charter car from Zubwa to Kubwa lol! Well thank God her house was easily located; Damm her house was beautiful, i said to myself again if this woman fit own a mansion why me no go fit(but i never knew i was dreaming).
She was the only one staying in the house coz her husband normally come home maybe weekend and her only son is in the USA studying.
After like a month of staying with her, to cut the story short! no job, no movement, no money for my hand again(after spending all my alawee for transport and stuff) she told me not to worry that she is working out something for me at her place of work(Ministry), That for the mean time that i should be washing her car so she would be giving me something to use hold body lol! I obliged o, i come dey wash car for her; 3months don pass i still dey wash her car, her friends car, even some neighborhood people self dey bring car to help them wash.
After 4months i told her how far the "Ministry job" she told me that the position that she wants to fix me in is taken by somebody else that i should be patient, i got angry and told her that:
Me: I am leaving for Lagos the next day say i get interview in two days time.
Madam: why so soon, after all my effort you just want to go to Lagos just like that
Me: yes ma, i have an interview in two days time and i don't want to miss it
Madam: o really
Me: yes, since i came here i have never submitted CV or you collecting my CV not to talk going for interview Madam: what about setting up a car wash for you here(Abuja)
Me: na so i open mouth(so na car wash dis woman want make i come dey do for Abuja)

Till now the woman no know as i take reach lagos.
can you imagine? after four months she's now talking about car wash.

if she had set up car wash and called you to manage it, that would've even made a little brain.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by odimbannamdi(m): 10:30am On Jul 18, 2019
LordAdam16:


See this too many times, that maybe it's necessary to set the record straight.

Factory and warehouse jobs the world over are terrible. Go read accounts about minimum-wage workers in Amazon processing centers who have to pee in bottles to save time. That's a company with a $990b market cap.

This also explains why automation is seeing rapid growth in that sector, with the hope that the factories and warehouses of the future will not employ humans.

The question really is would you or anyone you know buy cabin biscuit for N40 apiece to help provide the "humane" working conditions you hastily propose for the factory workers? Or isn't this just the ironic conundrum that those who decry conditions regarded as representative of modern slavery are often the most price-conscious consumers.

Same individuals who'd go to a local eatery (commonly called mama put) and want a large serve of rice, beans, plantain, two large-sized cuts of meat all for less than $1 if possible. And then when they're told the worker is paid less than 10k monthly after "slaving" from 6 to 6, they begin fuming like they've ever tipped or make it a point to pay excess.

If you think you can run a factory that pays much better, gives lots of breaks, paid vacations, even maternity/paternity leave to low-skilled workers; while simultaneously offering low market price or even better undercutting the competition, paying off your double-digit loans timely, and providing double-digit returns to investors and shareholders; please write a business plan and I can guarantee you you'd become a billionaire in 5 years as capital will find you instead of the other way around.

Gala has been sold at 50 naira for over 10 years. In that same time minimum wage has risen from 9800 to 30000, and NGN/USD rate has risen from 100/$ to 360/$. Now if UAC says they want to increase the price to 150 to match the wage and rate increase; how many of you would buy?

This is the type of economic illiteracy that leads to the election of nutjobs like Buhari and AOC.

There's no emotion in the jungle or the real world. Employers do not just arbitrarily choose what to pay workers, the market determines what to pay workers.

That is why entry doctors in Nigeria earn $6000 while their mates in the US earn 6 figures. The difference however is that while childbirth by CS in Nigeria stays below $800 in total; in the US, it goes for about or over $10k (you can check the giving birth thread on NL). In fact, a woman was quoted $877,000 after having triplets. Heart transplants can reach 7 figures.

I'd like to see people proffer solutions on how to address wage inequality without the emotional-laden diatribes. That last bit disgusts me!

-Lord

Well said, sir
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by moshuur(m): 10:54am On Jul 18, 2019
damtan:
Honestly this thread is capable of healing depression and restoring hope. I've laughed and laughed and still laughing smileysmiley
hmmmm......u are right.But its also creating fear/anxiety (if u know what I mean).
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by kaima1984(f): 3:32pm On Jul 18, 2019
Hybrid600:


Happy birthday K!
Thanks hybrid
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Olamsoh: 5:24pm On Jul 18, 2019
Thanks.
ireneidiva:

It is 'mop' not 'mob'.
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Olamsoh: 5:24pm On Jul 18, 2019
what!!!!!!!!!!
holafloyd:

When required to sell up to 200 decoders per month to get ur commission.

1 Like

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Olamsoh: 5:25pm On Jul 18, 2019
MrFly:
u were overpaid sef. Lol
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by martinskelly(m): 10:30pm On Jul 18, 2019
ChristineC:
can you imagine? after four months she's now talking about car wash.

if she had set up car wash and called you to manage it, that would've even made a little brain.
I tire o, for her mind she think say she fit remote-control me na
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Pekun210(m): 4:11pm On Jul 19, 2019
This happened in 2017 when we(two of my friends and i) were looking was looking for industrial training attachment

So i was looking up farms online and my friend happen to give me contact of a farm in edo state

I contacted the farm and the CEO was pleased to work with us and he asked us to submit application letter and link to our Facebook profile page which we did...
Note: the friend that referred me to that farm said they pay 30k which made me applied in the first instance... Fast forward to when we receive their response he was willing to pay 10k monthly with accommodation

Even though we were expecting something more but the joy of leaving our beloved ekiti state blindfolded us �. That's how we left for benin o and they said the technical director will come pick us up�� i was like a whole technical director when we got there and i called the technical director one weird okada man showed up �

The journey to the suppose well furnished accommodation started and this people got accommodation without even checking the house� no toilet no bathroom we even killed about 5lizards when we opened the door�‍♂�‍♂. Did i mention the little fracas that occurred before we even entered the house edo pple ehn

And when we got to the farm, omo na bush full everywhere and the manager sweet talk us and we immediately fell for the plans he said was on ground. We discovered that they only had 3workers(security,crop man, technical man) and i can boldly say they are all labourers.

Fast forward a week after, the manager bought cassava stems and we planted 3 hectares in just 3days. Manually o!!!! We open ground with hoe o. After that one, we started making heaps and trust me its not the kind of heaps we have here in ekiti �. Manual weeding start �‍♂ and the manager will be like we are underworking especially me that i don't have much strength.

The most annoying thing is anytime he wants to give us anything the way he exaggerate ehn. He gave us assignment we didn't do it and the guy comot ham for salary ni o..

Long story cut short, we started complaining of hunger and demanding our pay at least we've used more than one month. So he gave us 1500 initially then he later added 5k. Omo na so we carry our bags run for our life o, we forfeited 3k.

I pray that God will give everyone of us good testimonies �

14 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by OlawaleBammie: 7:42pm On Jul 19, 2019
Pekun210:
This happened in 2017 when we(two of my friends and i) were looking was looking for industrial training attachment

So i was looking up farms online and my friend happen to give me contact of a farm in edo state

I contacted the farm and the CEO was pleased to work with us and he asked us to submit application letter and link to our Facebook profile page which we did...
Note: the friend that referred me to that farm said they pay 30k which made me applied in the first instance... Fast forward to when we receive their response he was willing to pay 10k monthly with accommodation

Even though we were expecting something more but the joy of leaving our beloved ekiti state blindfolded us �. That's how we left for benin o and they said the technical director will come pick us up�� i was like a whole technical director when we got there and i called the technical director one weird okada man showed up �

The journey to the suppose well furnished accommodation started and this people got accommodation without even checking the house� no toilet no bathroom we even killed about 5lizards when we opened the door�‍♂�‍♂. Did i mention the little fracas that occurred before we even entered the house edo pple ehn

And when we got to the farm, omo na bush full everywhere and the manager sweet talk us and we immediately fell for the plans he said was on ground. We discovered that they only had 3workers(security,crop man, technical man) and i can boldly say they are all labourers.

Fast forward a week after, the manager bought cassava stems and we planted 3 hectares in just 3days. Manually o!!!! We open ground with hoe o. After that one, we started making heaps and trust me its not the kind of heaps we have here in ekiti �. Manual weeding start �‍♂ and the manager will be like we are underworking especially me that i don't have much strength.

The most annoying thing is anytime he wants to give us anything the way he exaggerate ehn. He gave us assignment we didn't do it and the guy comot ham for salary ni o..

Long story cut short, we started complaining of hunger and demanding our pay at least we've used more than one month. So he gave us 1500 initially then he later added 5k. Omo na so we carry our bags run for our life o, we forfeited 3k.

I pray that God will give everyone of us good testimonies �
Hmmm, this is tru to some extent, it happens here in edo, am also from ekiti but i now lives in edo, forget all dos technical director, cash man rubish or wat did u name it, na confam labourer dey wan turn u to, full time self grin

3 Likes

Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by MrHandsome2013: 10:11am On Jul 20, 2019
dedons:
sent
. Should i pm you my own too big bro?
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by dedons: 10:39am On Jul 20, 2019
MrHandsome2013:
.
Should i pm you my own too big bro?
If you don't mind, I can also send you my bank account details because I need the money pass you.
Re: What Is The Most Ridiculous Job Offer You Have Ever Received? by Pekun210(m): 5:40pm On Jul 20, 2019
OlawaleBammie:

Hmmm, this is tru to some extent, it happens here in edo, am also from ekiti but i now lives in edo, forget all dos technical director, cash man rubish or wat did u name it, na confam labourer dey wan turn u to, full time self grin

Na God say make i gbera o

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