hillarious

@poster u made my day, more please

hey guys, its been a while. hope you all having a wonderful time. here we go again,

Wanna cry? DO IT. Wanna scream? DO IT. Wanna fight? DO IT. Wanna slap? DO IT. Lifes too short to be afraid.

If you insist on telling me about your weekend, I suggest you do it in the bathroom, as it's the only place I'll give a shit.

Do blind people believe in love at first hear?

Best way to hang up on someone is to do it in the middle of YOUR OWN sentence. that way, they never suspect you hung up on them.

To make small talk interesting, stare inquisitively at one spot on the person's face until they self-consciously touch it.

A friend told me I take facebook way too seriously. Don't worry, I deleted her

People with dreadlocks either love weed or hate showers.

Some people should come with subtitles.

For those who like me, raise your hands. For those who dont, raise your standards.

I would never give you a death sentence. It would be more like a paragraph.

I hate people that chew gum like not-so-smart cows.

When a girl says "whatever" she really means: "I hope you get shot & fall off a bridge." or F>U>C>K you

All the single ladies, put ya hand up! LOL JK you're single for a reason so put yo hand back down.

Damn shame some of ya'll will get on facebook to say Good morning before you even brushed your teeth.

I want to have 3 kids and name them Ctrl, Alt and Delete. Then if they Bleep up I will just hit them all at once.

Be like a moon, so simple yet so attractive, so enlightening yet so cool, moving yet still, so romantic yet single.

Getting back with your ex is pretty much the same as taking a shower and putting back on your dirty underwear.

People ask me why it's so hard to trust people, I ask them why its so hard to keep a promise?

^^ you single handedly nearly set me off to sleep

boring!!

I feel sorry for people for who don't smoke or drink because they'll be on their dying bed one day and doesn't no wots responsible for their ailment.

lol

e-herbal:

I feel sorry for people for who don't smoke or drink because they'll be on their dying bed one day and doesn't no wots responsible for their ailment.

well, at least it won't be from liver failure or lung cancer

hhmmm

Md4real- d quotes r really rly nice n they all mk plenty sense. Dnt wanna leave in a hurry.
@Efe- I can't imagine y u dnt lyk em. Can't imagine y u wld keep reading somfyn u dnt like. Do us all a favor "move on"!!!!!!!

^^ girl anything posted here is fair game to comments - good or bad

If I don't like a joke, I say it like it is - I fear no one

also, if I see a joke I like - I appreciate it, and say it like it is (again) even if everyone else disagrees

I'm entitled to ma opinion and I use it!

Now cut me some slack jor

Some people should come with subtitles.

u are still the MAIN MAN,

lancaster:

Some people should come with subtitles.

like Efe ba!

Efemena_xy:

^^ you single handedly nearly set me off to sleep

boring!! 

md4real:

For those who like me, raise your hands. For those who dont, raise your standards.

i guess you have to yield to the above

People say you don't know what you've got till its gone. The truth is you knew what you had; you just thought you'd never lose it.


They should really replace "I now pronounce you man and wife" with "FINISH HIM!!!


You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.


When climbing the ladder of success, don't let boys look up your skirt!


‎"If you want your dreams to come true, don't over sleep."

efe, stick a dick up ur ass joooo!!, hater!!!!!!!!

U just made my 2011, keep it comin, Getting back with your ex is pretty much the same as taking a shower and putting back on your dirty underwear

efe, stick a manliness up your backside joooo!!, hater!!!!!!!!

wonderfuLL

When a girl says "whatever" she really means: "I hope you get shot & fall off a bridge." or F>U>C>K you

eeehn,

A friend told me I take facebook way too seriously. Don't worry, I deleted her

happy new year guys, here are more.jope it gonna make you smile.

If you get married to someone you met on Facebook, do you have to use their username at the ceremony?


Why do deaf people have names? Its a waste of time!


Everyone thinks the movie "Titanic" is a romantic film. NO! its a fucking horror film EVERYONE dies!


People with big eyes usually Bleep up a surprise party. lol


You know your ugly when you need prescription make up.


Its not fair, I think marriage proposals should be equal. "WOMAN!, Get on your knees TOO!, we bout to get married!!" lol


There are only two types of honest people in this world, small children and drunk people,


For men who think, ”A women’s place is in the kitchen”, just remember: that’s where the knives are kept!


Don't u think Facebook should change the status question from “What’s on ur mind?” to “What’s ur problem today?”

How was it to be unnoticed by the person you notice most? It’s as if you were offering your most beautiful portrait to a blind person.


When we were together, you always said you'd die for me. Now that we've broke up, I think it's time you kept your promise!


So much shit comes out your mouth, your ass is jealous.


I broke up with my crosseyed girlfriend today. sHe was seeing someone else.


I'm coming to your funeral just to make sure you're dead!


When your gf/bf says "I love u" say " I love youtube" back, they'll never notice the difference.

I broke up with my crosseyed girlfriend today. sHe was seeing someone else.

@md4real.u re just too much,very creative n hilarious.

polokor60:

@md4real.u re just too much,very creative n hilarious.

thanks

Loool!

Very funny, laughing out out out out loud.

when i was a kid i used to say a,b,c,d,e,f,g,h,i,j,k, ELEMENO ,p,q


Oh my God , this one sent me laughing so so hard my sister was wondering what's wrong with me . It's fucking true ! Oh my God , this is the best thread I've ever been On , Poster ur the best

How do I save these quotes ? which will be better , to save the URL or cope the quotes ?

For men who think,  ”A women’s place is in the kitchen”, just remember: that’s where the knives are kept!

Lol!

Really funny stuff

ROTFLMAO!!!! luv dem all. kip dem cumin

When we were together, you always said you'd die for me. Now that we've broke up, I think it's time you kept your promise!

jst 4warded dat to 4 people,

u d bomb man,

There ain't no mountain high enough to keep me from you babe, JK LOL. have you seen Mt. Everest? I'm not climbing that s>h>i>t for you!

God please give me patience, because if you give me strength I may just beat someone to death


If you think it's necessary to judge me by my past, don't get mad when I think it's necessary to put you there

awesome

keep it up