I read that ‘Ego’ in Igbo language and it still make sense.

Myzzyfrazzy:
My dad always believes he is right and as the head believes his words should stand.
recently i lost my cousin. he drownes in a river after taking hard drugs. during his strugle with life my dad was lamenting how he was a wayward person i called him and adviced him to have compassion and stop saying bad things about his own families to outsider and he said i was foolish and dont have the spirit of God that i am supporting evil.. its now so bad that he has turned against my mum that my mum is the one instigating his kids against him.. he has single handedly made lots of bad decision that we all suffer while i was still staying with him.. he no longer tells my mum anything.

Most African father say this. My dad has said it once to my mum

Can you listen to yourself?
Your dad is making bad decisions because he was honest about how your junkie of a cousin allowed his useless lifestyle kill him?
So you'd have rathered he sugarcoated it so you could tow the same route?

Do you know what it takes to be a dad?
Do you know what it takes to pay a woman's brideprice and live under the same roof with her despite their troubles?
Do you know the energy drain to even ejaculate before a baby can be formed?
Do you even know the pain your dad feels from just having kids like yourself who think he is their only problem in life?

Walahi, children like you are the reason God has left many couples barren to prevent potential heartbreaks.
Better advice your mom to drop her divide-and-rule agenda and accept that it is in her place to be submissive.

You have not yet stated anything bad your dad did, infact your dad is actually correct about you being in support of your mum, your dad is a man of principle and standard, he always speak the truth and cares not if it is his family that is caught in revealing the truth.
I like men like your dad, your cousin was a drug addict and I am sure your dad warned him severally but his children and wife were pampering with him kind words.

Can you change him? No
So follow him subtly and gently
He is too old to be changed

Most of them thinks been a father makes them right always..they feels seeking advise from children takes away the fatherhood in them....but wen e reach to escort them or follow dem for their pension waka...come see how dem dey seek for advise like pikin wey dem give home work 4rm school.

If there were many numbers of your dad, maybe we won't have idiotic drug heads


Your dad is on point

Myzzyfrazzy:
My dad always believes he is right and as the head believes his words should stand.
recently i lost my cousin. he drownes in a river after taking hard drugs. during his strugle with life my dad was lamenting how he was a wayward person i called him and adviced him to have compassion and stop saying bad things about his own families to outsider and he said i was foolish and dont have the spirit of God that i am supporting evil.. its now so bad that he has turned against my mum that my mum is the one instigating his kids against him.. he has single handedly made lots of bad decision that we all suffer while i was still staying with him.. he no longer tells my mum anything.

I think your father was just honest about what was going on... no matter how sad is what happened, he was absolutely right.

There is not much you can do to a person who is addicted to drugs (especially in Nigeria) unless that person decides on their own to change... but sadly, anything that happens is THEIR OWN FAULT.

He needs a counselor.

MrBrownJay1:


I think your father was just honest about what was going on... no matter how sad is what happened, he was absolutely right.

There is not much you can do to a person who is addicted to drugs (especially in Nigeria) unless that person decides on thwor own to change... but sadly, anything that happens is THEIR OWN FAULT.

i know but rubbing it in his mothers face(his own sister) while she was mourning. this guy grew up without a father he hard to earn a living from childhood hence the hard life...

one of my cousins with 3 kids 36 yrs of age my dad saw him after a long time and started condemning his dress code.. a grown up man..
there are other ways to approach issues like this..
he has always been so harsh towards ny cousins so they are always avoiding him because of his judgy nature.. he sees me around dem and concludes i fraternize with evil

You still haven't told us the problem.

I read your story twice and I didn't see where his ego has affected his decisions.

You only talked about your late cousin.

Your dad is a disciplinarian. He doesnt mince words. Your late cousin was a junkie and your dad treated him as such. Let's call a spade a spade. Not been sympathetic about the lost doesn't equate to ego. It's just what it is

As for your mum. She's a woman. Nine times out of ten, women must put emotions in every judgement.

Learn to be rational, don't be a mama's boy. If you don't take time, your mum will manipulate you into hating your dad and becoming a sissy.

Women? Fear them!
I have said my own

Don't quote me

Myzzyfrazzy:


i know but rubbing it in his mothers face(his own sister) while she was mourning. this guy grew up without a father he hard to earn a living from childhood hence the hard life...

one of my cousins with 3 kids 36 yrs of age my dad saw him after a long time and started condemning his dress code.. a grown up man..
there are other ways to approach issues like this..
he has always been so harsh towards ny cousins so they are always avoiding him because of his judgy nature.. he sees me around dem and concludes i fraternize with evil

Our parents grew up in a different era where things were different...thats how they were brought up and you certainly cant expext them to change or accept something that makes NO SENSE to them. Do you?
expecting such person to understand the crazy way of life that some people live today is a waste of time.

And as much as you may see it differently, being in the same entourage as these drug addicts would make ANYBODY believe that you are doing the same.

NwaAmaikpe:




Can you listen to yourself?
Your dad is making bad decisions because he was honest about how your junkie of a cousin allowed his useless lifestyle kill him?
So you'd have rathered he sugarcoated it so you could tow the same route?

Do you know what it takes to be a dad?
Do you know what it takes to pay a woman's brideprice and live under the same roof with her despite their troubles?
Do you know the energy drain to even ejaculate before a baby can be formed?
Do you even know the pain your dad feels from just having kids like yourself who think he is their only problem in life?

Walahi, children like you are the reason God has left many couples barren to prevent potential heartbreaks.
Better advice your mom to drop her divide-and-rule agenda and accept that it is in her place to be submissive.

there are times to be honest and brutal. and there are times to show compassion and love all just to win someone over.. because somone refused to to change from a bad habit does not stop him from being his nephew. for peace to reign i have discusses with my mum and we have concluded not to advice him against anything.. we will just turn deaf hears to his plans and habits..

Myzzyfrazzy:
My dad always believes he is right and as the head believes his words should stand.
recently i lost my cousin. he drownes in a river after taking hard drugs. during his strugle with life my dad was lamenting how he was a wayward person i called him and adviced him to have compassion and stop saying bad things about his own families to outsider and he said i was foolish and dont have the spirit of God that i am supporting evil.. its now so bad that he has turned against my mum that my mum is the one instigating his kids against him.. he has single handedly made lots of bad decision that we all suffer while i was still staying with him.. he no longer tells my mum anything.

Your dad may have points but he should learn to be diplomatic (Col 4:6)

MrBrownJay1:


Our parents grew up in a different era where things were different...thats how they were brought up and you certainly cant expext them to change or accept something that makes NO SENSE to them. Do you?
expecting such person to understand the crazy way of life that some people live today is a waste of time.

And as much as you may see it differently, being in the same entourage as these drug addicts would make ANYBODY believe that you are doing the same.

i appreciate your replies..

he is quite a disciplinarian. i myself no better than to do drugs..

i think i need to be slow with my advice. we both see things differently.

24kmagic:
You still haven't told us the problem.

I read your story twice and I didn't see where his ego has affected his decisions.

You only talked about your late cousin.

Your dad is a disciplinarian. He doesnt mince words. Your late cousin was a junkie and your dad treated him as such. Let's call a spade a spade. Not been sympathetic about the lost doesn't equate to ego. It's just what it is

As for your mum. She's a woman. Nine times out of ten, women must put emotions in every judgement.

Learn to be rational, don't be a mama's boy. If you don't take time, your mum will manipulate you into hating your dad and becoming a sissy.

Women? Fear them!
I have said my own

Don't quote me

i just did not know how to tell the stories this incident just triggered d past.. my papa nor dy hear word.. na wetin dey he mind he dey do.. if you like show am proof. he prefers listening to outsiders than his own family.. somtimes he hides some information and seeks advice from an outsider

When I was a young boy, I used not to see eye to eye with my Dad.
But as a grown man now, my Dad is my hero. So full of wisdom.
He is my best buddy and we talk on the phone every week
Being a father is no mean feat

You still have a lot of growing up to do.
When you mature more, your eyes will open to a great father you had.
Just pray it won't be late for you then, if he is no more.
Keep conniving with your mother.

Myzzyfrazzy:
My dad always believes he is right and as the head believes his words should stand.
recently i lost my cousin. he drownes in a river after taking hard drugs. during his strugle with life my dad was lamenting how he was a wayward person i called him and adviced him to have compassion and stop saying bad things about his own families to outsider and he said i was foolish and dont have the spirit of God that i am supporting evil.. its now so bad that he has turned against my mum that my mum is the one instigating his kids against him.. he has single handedly made lots of bad decision that we all suffer while i was still staying with him.. he no longer tells my mum anything.

You dad has been right with what he did from day one. You seem like the kind of child who would have gone astray if your dad wasn’t hard with the truth on you.

You should show him more respect and don’t ever pick side between your father and mom. It takes two to tango.

Go easy on him,family is something you don't have a choice to chose.Moreover, most Nigerian parents behave same way

Myzzyfrazzy:


i appreciate your replies..

he is quite a disciplinarian. i myself no better than to do drugs..

i think i need to be slow with my advice. we both see things differently.

There is nothing wrong with having a different opinion, and as much as they wouldn't understand your views, they are entitled to their opinion (as elders).....Just do what you think is best for your life and basta.

Be careful about being distant from your dad my friend.
He will continue to seek advice outside as long as he feels there's a competition inside.

How about you show your dad the kind of love you are expecting from him?
Alienating your dad and being closer to your mom will only send him far from you people because he will think you are ganging up against him.

Get to know your dad better by being his disciple and you can indirectly influence his decisions.

My dear take is easy
It something about African parents they always think they are right, they never apologizes and accept their faults

Don't forget to check my signature

Most African men are like that and they wonder why the children are closer to their mom and not them.

Only a foolish child will bring out his father to the public to be mocked and disparaged by children and simpletons.



Your father is disciplining you for your obvious stvpidity and saving you from eternal manipulation from the female folks, rather than sit up and take corrections, you decided to bring him here for ridicule and insults.


P.S. No woman (even your mother) can teach you how to be man. You can't give what you don't have.

Myzzyfrazzy:
My dad always believes he is right and as the head believes his words should stand.
recently i lost my cousin. he drownes in a river after taking hard drugs. during his strugle with life my dad was lamenting how he was a wayward person i called him and adviced him to have compassion and stop saying bad things about his own families to outsider and he said i was foolish and dont have the spirit of God that i am supporting evil.. its now so bad that he has turned against my mum that my mum is the one instigating his kids against him.. he has single handedly made lots of bad decision that we all suffer while i was still staying with him.. he no longer tells my mum
anything.

Growing up I thought my father was too hard on people.
He was right
I am thankful for the values and culture he taught me
I miss my father a lot,
How I wish I can pick up the phone and tell my father about my day
Victories and challenges I have gone through
I am very sure if he can look down
He will be very pride of the man I have become
Miss u dad

djon78:
When I was a young boy, I used not to see eye to eye with my Dad.
But as a grown man now, my Dad is my hero. So full of wisdom.
He is my best buddy and we talk on the phone every week
Being a father is no mean feat

You still have a lot of growing up to do.
When you mature more, your eyes will open to a great father you had.
Just pray it won't be late for you then, if he is no more.
Keep conniving with your mother.

Tell him

Myzzyfrazzy:


i know but rubbing it in his mothers face(his own sister) while she was mourning. this guy grew up without a father he hard to earn a living from childhood hence the hard life...

one of my cousins with 3 kids 36 yrs of age my dad saw him after a long time and started condemning his dress code.. a grown up man..
there are other ways to approach issues like this..
he has always been so harsh towards ny cousins so they are always avoiding him because of his judgy nature.. he sees me around dem and concludes i fraternize with evil

some people need to be told to grow up
and now we are telling you to grow up
listen to ur Dad
if your disagreed with him, let him know respectfully

Robbin7:


You dad has been right with what he did from day one. You seem like the kind of child who would have gone astray if your dad wasn’t hard with the truth on you.

You should show him more respect and don’t ever pick side between your father and mom. It takes two to tango.

Hi... It's a close friend. I sent you an email with another account... Please reply as soon as possible

Davash222:
I read that ‘Ego’ in Igbo language and it still make sense.

Too much reasoning will not kill you..m

Myzzyfrazzy:
My dad always believes he is right and as the head believes his words should stand.
recently i lost my cousin. he drownes in a river after taking hard drugs. during his strugle with life my dad was lamenting how he was a wayward person i called him and adviced him to have compassion and stop saying bad things about his own families to outsider and he said i was foolish and dont have the spirit of God that i am supporting evil.. its now so bad that he has turned against my mum that my mum is the one instigating his kids against him.. he has single handedly made lots of bad decision that we all suffer while i was still staying with him.. he no longer tells my mum anything.

So you expect your dad to support social misconduct?