amarachi06:
I have been married for 6years without a child. it has been the worst time of My life to be married without a child.

Anytime we argue, he will shout at me with scorn and hateful words but he can never speak to his family members that way.

lf l try to talk with him over some issues or advice which will benefit us, he will shot me down, only for us to suffer later.

l have tried to Know my wrong to him but he doesn't wanna tell me. l am in deep pains cos he has told me "that anytime l want to leave, that am free to do so".

On Monday, he came back around 12am, and l was worried till that time. He came back without explaination and l asked him, whether l am that invisible to him, and his reply was "if l am tired, that l should leave". l now replied, "if l have a child, will you send us out?" he didn't say anything but l know that his attitude is cos of that.

The day l had my Last miscarriage was in 2016, and the tears l had in My eyes was not about my baby but knowing that l will Not be loved again by my husband.

l am tired! l almost went Into depression, and sucide, cos of his attitude to me. l don't Know how to handle him, cos my presence irritates him.

Please Sound advice.

Please email me.
cheyimoj@yahoo.com

Will check mail 3days time

Sorry for the various issues you face. I do not know how many miscarriages you have faced. I can only assume they are more than once

For those calling you barren I assume it is a comprehensive issue. She is NOT barren

Your issues may be a Rhesus factor issue. Simple yet deadly. This can potentially lead to a life time littered with miscarriages and sorrow

If your blood group is negative in whatever form, it means you have a form of protein in your red blood cell. As long as you are negative, you would likely be incompatible with your husband. If he is positive which most peoples are by the way, then you are what we call Rhesus incompatible. That's only half of the story in your case anyway

Imagine a situation where you had an earlier abortion while in school and you have this Rhesus factor negative due to your blood type. The likelihood that the person that got you pregnant then is Rhesus positive is high as majority of people are positive. And then you had your abortion. Ostensibly you should have had an RH immune Globin injection to prevent acquiring dangerous antibodies from the RH positive child you aborted. Without this injection you may go on to acquire this dangerous antibodies which would attack any future pregnancy you have, leading to its miscarriage..when you hear of a woman having consistent miscarriages RH factor is usually the culprit

What to do

If indeed you are blood type negative, and you had a pregnancy in the past without taking this injection after termination, you need to schedule an appointment with your doctor immediately

If this isnt the case, then you would be a mum soon. With or without your abusive husband

Focus on God for now, let your husband be in peace, be happy and please go on ur knees there's nothing God cannot do. I'm inviting you to Shiloh 2019 please if you are in Lagos please be there but most importantly start visiting motherless babies homes feed them, go help bath them and if you see a begger with a child or children don't hesitate to buy them food to eat. Visit maternity wards to gift new borns. Buy ok baby clothes for the new mothers who can't afford. If you do this joyfully and you don't take in after 1month, carry your baby for 9months forget God.

crownmeohGod:

U r not barren na,d mistake ur husband is making is He might actually be on the wrong side of this but dont let us think of it that way..in marriage,couples are meant to support,understand,trust each other.

My advice for u, mind your business,ur husband neva stopped loving u...
Make ur sef happy,face ur work,dress smartly and neatly..seduce him with wears but make it look like u r minding ur businees,b respectful,greet him.,u knw d tinx he loves..do them and dont expect him to reciprociate it back now..

The health part,go for check up..treat infection if there is any.Then eat enough of date palm and tigernut..
Last part,as a wife u must alwaya be prayerful..

Gbam....

In addition, if he still refused to have a conversation with you, write whatever you want on a paper and place where he can see it... But becareful with the words you use o

You need to exercise

amarachi06:
I have been married for 6years without a child. it has been the worst time of My life to be married without a child.

Anytime we argue, he will shout at me with scorn and hateful words but he can never speak to his family members that way.

lf l try to talk with him over some issues or advice which will benefit us, he will shot me down, only for us to suffer later.

l have tried to Know my wrong to him but he doesn't wanna tell me. l am in deep pains cos he has told me "that anytime l want to leave, that am free to do so".

On Monday, he came back around 12am, and l was worried till that time. He came back without explaination and l asked him, whether l am that invisible to him, and his reply was "if l am tired, that l should leave". l now replied, "if l have a child, will you send us out?" he didn't say anything but l know that his attitude is cos of that.

The day l had my Last miscarriage was in 2016, and the tears l had in My eyes was not about my baby but knowing that l will Not be loved again by my husband.

l am tired! l almost went Into depression, and sucide, cos of his attitude to me. l don't Know how to handle him, cos my presence irritates him.

Please Sound advice.

The problem is that your husband seems not to be the patient or loving type. I know a couple that had this same problem for 5 years.

The husband defended his wife from his family members who were making her feel very bad by stopping such people from gaining access ( don't advice him to do this, I guess I don't know).

Guess what, a bouncing baby boy came in the fifth year.

Feel so sorry for you. I will also pray that your prayers are answered.

Who talked of infertility? Read you dont want to read....

genq:
Who is the cause of infertility - you or your husband?
If it's you, sorry to say he's probably planning an exit strategy or starting a family elsewhere.
It's only God or a miracle baby that can salvage this situation.
If you are a believer, stay prayerful but make sure to also seek medical intervention towards having a child of your own.

It is called sacrifice don't go to any man of God for prayers, don't go do juju sacrifice but go to motherless babies homes, bath them, cuddle them if they cry, put them to sleep, go round your neighborhood or anywhere look for children that don't have Christmas clothes gift them, visit maternity wards in any hospital even if you don't have anything go for a visit and say welcome to the world to the new borns. Just tell but at least you can afford a little gift. My sister this works like magic. And this is the best sacrifice you can make.

Women go through shiit sha.

Are you gainfully employed pls leave that marriage.

Why must you live with scum like this when there are hordes of guys out there to be happy with.

Marriage is not the be all and have all especially with this kind of cunts for horsebands

amarachi06:
I have been married for 6years without a child. it has been the worst time of My life to be married without a child.

Anytime we argue, he will shout at me with scorn and hateful words but he can never speak to his family members that way.

lf l try to talk with him over some issues or advice which will benefit us, he will shot me down, only for us to suffer later.

l have tried to Know my wrong to him but he doesn't wanna tell me. l am in deep pains cos he has told me "that anytime l want to leave, that am free to do so".

On Monday, he came back around 12am, and l was worried till that time. He came back without explaination and l asked him, whether l am that invisible to him, and his reply was "if l am tired, that l should leave". l now replied, "if l have a child, will you send us out?" he didn't say anything but l know that his attitude is cos of that.

The day l had my Last miscarriage was in 2016, and the tears l had in My eyes was not about my baby but knowing that l will Not be loved again by my husband.

l am tired! l almost went Into depression, and sucide, cos of his attitude to me. l don't Know how to handle him, cos my presence irritates him.

Please Sound advice.

Go get help from professionals.

citadels:
It is called sacrifice don't go to any man of God for prayers, don't go do juju sacrifice but go to motherless babies homes, bath them, cuddle them if they cry, put them to sleep, go round your neighborhood or anywhere look for children that don't have Christmas clothes gift them, visit maternity wards in any hospital even if you don't have anything go for a visit and say welcome to the world to the new borns. Just tell but at least you can afford a little gift. My sister this works like magic. And this is the best sacrifice you can make.

Abeg this will just tilt her into depression.

elektra:
You see dem? Awon “watch war room and pray” crew

mama nairaland

amarachi06:


Thank you, am crying already. Is well with my soul, never believed that l will not have a child by now. All my sisters are married with kids, and am scared of exchanging words with people for fear of being called a barren woman, and eater of my kids, which l am not. Thank you all for your kind words.

Madam be strong.... The problem might not be from you. I will advise you both go for medical check up. It is possible his sperm is not strong enough to fertize your womb. There are some wonderful supplements that can help you. I can introduce some of them to you if you're interested. Always stay connected to the one that gives children.....the ALMIGHTY GOD!!!!
GOD BLESS YOUR WOMB

amarachi06:


Thank you, am crying already. Is well with my soul, never believed that l will not have a child by now. All my sisters are married with kids, and am scared of exchanging words with people for fear of being called a barren woman, and eater of my kids, which l am not. Thank you all for your kind words.

Look you don't have to live life according to how ppl dictate it to you. Forget about what ppl will say. You were not born to be rubbished by one unappreciative idiot that calls himself a man. Stop associating with him cos you'll finally commit that suicide with all this negativity. Leave the marriage

Thegamingorca:



Abeg this will just tilt her into depression.

no. It won't. It will even bring her happiness each time she goes out to do it. There is a joy in helping people who can't help themselves.

I see people saying she will have her children soon and also forgetting that the same husband is not touching her rather finds her irritating. Well my prayer for her is that Good Almighty touches the husband heart because if he is getting laid outside that means she might end up loosing her marriage, because the heart of a man is so desperate and evil. May God be her guide

Sunnymatey:
My inlaw stood by my sister for 17yrs before they were blessed with a child.
Some men are sick.
Love between couple should be unconditional.

Wow.......and just 6 years someone is nagging. An Elder in my former church waited for solid 30 years before they were blessed with a child

elektra:
You see dem? Awon “watch war room and pray” crew

What crew do you belong to sef? Someone has been trying everything including medical and you became incensed because dem dey mention praying.
Tell us which crew you be among the following: You definitely belong to at least one!

Suicide?
Murder the husband?
Steal baby?
Evacuate someone pregnancy after killing the owner?
Throw caution to the wind to become full time prostitute?
Visit una mama or papa for ritual?

UjuJoan2:




I was talking about how women react to being treated badly in the future in the other thread, and most of the people advising her to 'endure' almost jumped me. They claimed I should be advising women to stand up for themselves and yapped about how women had a 'choice'. And here they are saying the exact opposite, confirming what I said initially.

Nigerian women will always be at a disadvantage, no matter how much we try to deny it.

This poster is being abused emotionally by her husband and yet the society expects her to stay. How do you think she will react in the future when she finally becomes a mother and the husband becomes 'nice'. When she realises she now has all the power over her abuser and doesn't have to cower because she now has 'a place' in his home?

Of course she's not thinking 'revenge' now, but she's feeling the resentment and she's feeling helpless about her situation. I doubt if she's going to wave a hand and forget all she's going through now in the future, and live happily ever after with her husband.

When she starts reacting, the man will claim his wife has changed, and these fake people here will support him.

What a joke!

I agree with you to some extent......women are always at the receiving end as far as Nigeria is concerned. This is sad

amarachi06:


Thank you, am crying already. Is well with my soul, never believed that l will not have a child by now. All my sisters are married with kids, and am scared of exchanging words with people for fear of being called a barren woman, and eater of my kids, which l am not. Thank you all for your kind words.

my neighbor was married for 9years without a child but last week of October, she delivered a bouncing baby girl.
Last Sunday, pastor and pastor Mrs John Eze of Heavenly Tabernacle Church, Bonsaac Extension Asaba, dedicated their triplets after 20 years of marriage.
I was a witness to this.
Dear sister, you will have children. Don't imagine suicide. Soon heaven will smile on you.
Avoid those little quarrels...
Trust God... He will give you children

amarachi06:


Thank you, am crying already. Is well with my soul, never believed that l will not have a child by now. All my sisters are married with kids, and am scared of exchanging words with people for fear of being called a barren woman, and eater of my kids, which l am not. Thank you all for your kind words.

have you tried IVF ?

Nawa o

Only 6years and you want to kill yourself. Mine is since 2011 and not one miscarriage. I never for one shout at my wife, even though the fault is not mine.

Visit a teaching hospital. Your problems will be solved

Simpleandsweet:
So sorry for your pain dear..please buy the book Supernatural Childbirth and take all the confessions inside daily..I am yet to see any woman waiting for a child that faithfully read and made the confessions in that book that didn't carry her own children! You will testify of God's goodness soonest!

Cheer up cos you are next in line for a miracle!

Truth .I have witness the wonders of this book several times

amarachi06:
I have been married for 6years without a child. it has been the worst time of My life to be married without a child.

Anytime we argue, he will shout at me with scorn and hateful words but he can never speak to his family members that way.

lf l try to talk with him over some issues or advice which will benefit us, he will shot me down, only for us to suffer later.

l have tried to Know my wrong to him but he doesn't wanna tell me. l am in deep pains cos he has told me "that anytime l want to leave, that am free to do so".

On Monday, he came back around 12am, and l was worried till that time. He came back without explaination and l asked him, whether l am that invisible to him, and his reply was "if l am tired, that l should leave". l now replied, "if l have a child, will you send us out?" he didn't say anything but l know that his attitude is cos of that.

The day l had my Last miscarriage was in 2016, and the tears l had in My eyes was not about my baby but knowing that l will Not be loved again by my husband.

l am tired! l almost went Into depression, and sucide, cos of his attitude to me. l don't Know how to handle him, cos my presence irritates him.

Please Sound advice.

I Feel your pain. To be honest, we men really don't care much about children as such. The pressures are mostly mounted by external pressures mostly from parents. You said one thing and I want to draw your attention to it. He can back home and you engaged him in a conversation but you see to him, that's not the right time and I will assume you kept on talking even when he'd prefer to just have some peace and quiet which was what drove him home in the first place and that lead him to telling you to leave if you want. He doesn't want you to leave dummy lol he just wants you to give him space as at that very moment.
My sister, AC been married fours very interesting years now. We had to wait 9 agonizing months before pregnancy which was OK for me. But I swear my wife nearly drove me insane. I had to go check my self medically. My elder brother has been married for close to 8 years now. His wife has had about 5 miscarriages and they've not killed themselves. Are they sad? Definitely. Do they frustrate each other over that? Even if they do, not publicly and I admire those two beyond bounds. I can bet my breakfast that you have become so frustrated about the whole child issues that you have forgotten how it is to be that girl! Just be the girl! Not the wife, the girl. Don't mate with him, f***k him! Search for were you dropped him mumu button and rock his world. Do those things you used to do that got his attention. You once had a miscarriage so that's prove enough that you are not barren. Every man wants to escape back home to some peace, give him peace. And I bet you, one lousy quickie is all it takes. Your husband loves you dearly and it is annoying to him that even you feels he'd love you better only if you have a child

If marriage is not rooted in love and companionship,then that isn't marriage at all.The main purpose of marriage is for man and woman to become husband and wife,and not necessarily Father and mother.
As in people should be schooled before getting into marriage,too many immature minds are in marriage.

amarachi06:


Thank you, am crying already. Is well with my soul, never believed that l will not have a child by now. All my sisters are married with kids, and am scared of exchanging words with people for fear of being called a barren woman, and eater of my kids, which l am not. Thank you all for your kind words.

Why are u bothered about people.

Your children will come at the right time.

Also consider going for IVF.

About Ur husband, it seems u make too much assumptions. What is happening might have nothing to do with u not having a child.

As for saying u should go if u are tired. Men say it but that does not mean they dnt love u

amarachi06:
I have been married for 6years without a child. it has been the worst time of My life to be married without a child.

Anytime we argue, he will shout at me with scorn and hateful words but he can never speak to his family members that way.

lf l try to talk with him over some issues or advice which will benefit us, he will shot me down, only for us to suffer later.

l have tried to Know my wrong to him but he doesn't wanna tell me. l am in deep pains cos he has told me "that anytime l want to leave, that am free to do so".

On Monday, he came back around 12am, and l was worried till that time. He came back without explaination and l asked him, whether l am that invisible to him, and his reply was "if l am tired, that l should leave". l now replied, "if l have a child, will you send us out?" he didn't say anything but l know that his attitude is cos of that.

The day l had my Last miscarriage was in 2016, and the tears l had in My eyes was not about my baby but knowing that l will Not be loved again by my husband.

l am tired! l almost went Into depression, and sucide, cos of his attitude to me. l don't Know how to handle him, cos my presence irritates him.

Please Sound advice.

I can feel your pain sighs. Your husband is being insensitive because I have a close friend who is married for about same number of years with you and he and his wife haven't had a child and still he showers his wife with excess love. In fact their love is even growing stronger with the wife looking hotter and happier everyday honestly.


And currently they have started an IVF process after doing much prayer and stuff, because initially they wanted to do it the spiritual way, but I learnt they have booked an IVF session to start soon.


So you and your husband need to visit a good fertility clinic not just any hospital. It will cost money, around 1.5 - 2million in Nigerian currency.

While on the fertility treatment plan, engage your God in faithful prayer, and be happy. Being unhappy can lead to miscarriages. Being too scared of having miscarrijage can cause miscarriage. Being too careful during pregnancy can lead to mental instability that can also trigger miscarriage. You need a sound and balanced state of mind and you need to be very happy at most times to overcome this dicey situation.


In as much as I am not happy with your Hubby's insensitive attitude towards you his wife at this unfortunate moment of your life, we must also understand that majority of Nigerian men marry to bear kids in wedlock; that's their number 1 priority for getting married, some marry for political connection, some marry for legal sex, some marry for showoff, some marry for foreign citizenship, some marry for money too or financial support from their wife, and only insignificant few marry for companionship.

Seems your husband married to have legal kids and as he is not getting what he went for, he is feeling frustrated already, so reason with him because I am sure you too married him for one or two or three reasons; maybe because he had money or maybe because you want a financial helper or you wanted to escape being single (marrying for the "Mrs" title) or you married to showoff to your friends, and I am sure if you married him for money and his money somehow vanished, you won't be happy with him too, so reason with him and try to avoid confrontations or anything that will lead to it.


Stop giving him advice for now since it leads to negative vibes, focus on the positive things that inspire and instigate positivity in your home only.


People advising you to quit the marriage are not being real, they are saying it for typing sake, they don't understand.

You are advising a woman who is finding it difficult to have a child to quit her marriage because her husband is not happy with her being childless and you think it will be easy for the woman to live a happy life even after quitting the marriage She will become even more miserable that will make it even more difficult for her to attract another good, worthy man if she quits her current marriage now with her current state of mind.

And it is not even easy for beautiful, hot looking, classy single ladies to find a husband anywhere in the world today, talk more of a lady that was married before, will she love to marry an older man with older kids which will be her most likely options if she quits


Some saying Nigerian women bla bla bla, it is not easy for American, European, Canadian, Australian women too, not easy for women all over the world. The only difference is that American, European, Canadian women are not financially dependent on their husbands and men because their nations economy is okay so they get good pay job easily but when it comes to emotional deficiencies and marriage issues, American and European women suffer the most because their men are no longer interested in getting married and when they do, they divorce so easily leaving these women vulnerable to internet romance scammers and reason Nigerian Yahoo Yahoo boys are smiling to bank scamming American, European, Canadian, Australian women with fake romance.


In fact, finding a reliable husband is easier for a lady in Africa than a lady in Europe, America, etc.


I used to be a professional international relationship counselor for years and I counseled women from all over the world so I know what I am talking about

amarachi06:


Thank you, am crying already. Is well with my soul, never believed that l will not have a child by now. All my sisters are married with kids, and am scared of exchanging words with people for fear of being called a barren woman, and eater of my kids, which l am not. Thank you all for your kind words.

If your husband comes home by 12am. Does he drink?

The eggs need a fertile, active sperm too. Not just your health, perhaps maybe he can follow you to the hospital too.

Meanwhile all the advise above me, especially the first 4 is the way to go. It is well

amarachi06:
I have been married for 6years without a child. it has been the worst time of My life to be married without a child.

Anytime we argue, he will shout at me with scorn and hateful words but he can never speak to his family members that way.

lf l try to talk with him over some issues or advice which will benefit us, he will shot me down, only for us to suffer later.

l have tried to Know my wrong to him but he doesn't wanna tell me. l am in deep pains cos he has told me "that anytime l want to leave, that am free to do so".

On Monday, he came back around 12am, and l was worried till that time. He came back without explaination and l asked him, whether l am that invisible to him, and his reply was "if l am tired, that l should leave". l now replied, "if l have a child, will you send us out?" he didn't say anything but l know that his attitude is cos of that.

The day l had my Last miscarriage was in 2016, and the tears l had in My eyes was not about my baby but knowing that l will Not be loved again by my husband.

l am tired! l almost went Into depression, and sucide, cos of his attitude to me. l don't Know how to handle him, cos my presence irritates him.

Please Sound advice.

Sister good morming.ur case resembles my own.yes its not always easy but it can be overcomed.Thank God u even take in.i believe is people in your shoes that know better where it hurts u most.

I remember then when my wife was three months preg.first time pregnancy always a joy.we went for a heavy shopping.next was a miscarriage. During evacuation i was given the boy to be buried 7 months then.was a big blow.
We went to the best gynavologist in Lagos no way.
Note...Sometimes a good doctor is not how expensive you are but how experienced.
The joy in our marriage gone.We relocated to enugu and met a good doctor.moment my wife took in was placed on hormones and like joke like joke i held my first kid AFTER six years of marriage.after one year i change gear and my wife took in and gave birth to our second kid and today i have a family and as im typing this we expecting no 3.

Now what is your location.I tell you 70% of doctor's in lagos ARE after your money not services.

Having had a miscarriage and have not taken in who did the Evacuation.was the foetus cleaned well.pls a scan can confirm that.noting is wrong with u.if ur within the east can give u the doct number.

Know your cycle well.see a gynaco.AFTER addressing all this get a sexy wears wait for ur hubby and make sure all goes down during every sex in ur ovulation.

Most importantly pray.but i tell u is well.
Note when womb not cleaned or evacuated well of foetus always a problem.im an engineer but my wife problem partially turned me to a doctor.