There is a special account banks open for students not up to 18. I have a son in the university who is not 18 and he has an account where his money goes to. The banks are in the school premises, so he should open it in the school. please sponsor the boy's education so that he can later help his mum. Look for some amount of money for your cousin to begin business and look away afterwards. Good luck.

I went through the original post once again and I did not see any of these (I was specifically looking for them):

-Age of the couple

-When they married

-Tribe of the op or his cousin

So, those of you with background information dropping hints here and there which are unknown to the rest of us, perhaps you should communicate with the op and yourselves privately?

Just when I was telling myself that Nairalanders would have bombarded op's inbox with requests by now, I got to this post. At least this one made his request in public

lavenjcrown:
You have done so great for your cousin. i believe that God really sees your helping heart and he will continue to bless and protect you. please keep doing what you think is best to you and never follow any ones advise. please i'm always in financial need and i would love you to assist me. my acct Detail: ADESINA STEVEN AJIBOLA....... ACCESS/DIAMOND BANK........... 0023830047. Thanks in anticipation.

We're all in one financial need or the other, should we all send Op our account details? Someone already has the burden of 6 family members on his neck, you want to add your own join. How considerate of you

J111333:
This is personal so please be courteous with your comments.

I have a married female cousin who takes church serious more than her life, well I don't wanna waste your time with that part of the story.

I have tried to help her husband and her financially for a long time now and I'm afraid I've turned from helper to head of household, not funny. I jokingly told them to hang their boots after they had their fourth child but as I'm typing this, baby five just landed.

Their first son just got admitted into Unilag and guess who they called to help. I've severally decided to stop helping but thoughts of those lovely kids of theirs have always affected my decisions.

I told the newly college admitted boy to open a bank account so that I can channel my help properly but her mum said he wasn't 18 yet so she would be the one running the account until then.

A little background story.

My cousin is a graduate but helps her husband in an imaginary business of his which I have put in like N10m if not more yet nothing to show for it. I later switched to helping my cousin get a job, she ended up getting duped of the money meant to pursue the job Nigerianly.

She was/is my favourite cousin growing up and she was more than a nanny to my sister and I when we were little.

How can I put an end to this madness without feeling guilty about the kids? Mind you, I love their kids very much.

You're a very good person, but you need to be very careful henceforth. Call your favorite cousin and tell her how much she has disappointed you. Make sure the little man opens an account where you can send him money directly, try to set up a small business for her. But before that, tell her this is the last time you'd be investing in her and she has to make good decisions this time. You're a good person

J111333:
This is personal so please be courteous with your comments.

I have a married female cousin who takes church serious more than her life, well I don't wanna waste your time with that part of the story.

I have tried to help her husband and her financially for a long time now and I'm afraid I've turned from helper to head of household, not funny. I jokingly told them to hang their boots after they had their fourth child but as I'm typing this, baby five just landed.

Their first son just got admitted into Unilag and guess who they called to help. I've severally decided to stop helping but thoughts of those lovely kids of theirs have always affected my decisions.

I told the newly college admitted boy to open a bank account so that I can channel my help properly but her mum said he wasn't 18 yet so she would be the one running the account until then.

A little background story.

My cousin is a graduate but helps her husband in an imaginary business of his which I have put in like N10m if not more yet nothing to show for it. I later switched to helping my cousin get a job, she ended up getting duped of the money meant to pursue the job Nigerianly.

She was/is my favourite cousin growing up and she was more than a nanny to my sister and I when we were little.

How can I put an end to this madness without feeling guilty about the kids? Mind you, I love their kids very much.

Keep wasting your time!!! What will advise is coming just be patient

You see this churchy ladies/ women. They really piss me the fvck off. You claim to be holy but you have sex any how and bear children like rabbits. If you advise them to do family planning, they'd say it is against their belief. I know this because I have stupîd uncle just like this.

I don't know about you but the earlier you put a stop to this bBS the better because you are now automatically their ATM and for sure baby number 6 is still in her husband's bank awaiting deployment.
I dislike people like this; you have no stable source of income yet you fvck and mass produce kids like it is nothing then start distributing them to relations to cater for them

Ishilove:

Congrats. Your 5th child has been born. Get ready to train your child up to university level.


This kind of heart is partly why most of my life savings is gone. People are so exploitative and manipulative, are ready to milk you dry till you wither away, and are even ready to use the husk of your withered state as toothpick. When you carry the whole world on your shoulders, like Colossus, you better be very strong. Your cousin has developed this entitlement mentality because she has your mumu button. Who in God's name is still having up to 5 children in this Buhari era?? Even wealthy folks don't have that many, not to talk of people who are just managing to meet ends meet? If they didn't have Brother J to fall back on wouldn't they find a way to manage their affairs??


Yes, you love their kids very much, but they are not orphans, the Good Lord be praised. You are stuck in a Sisyphean cycle of your own making and it will take strong mind and wisdom to break out. The first thing is stepping back and looking objectively at your cousin and her husband. If you drop dead today by virtue of your profession, won't they find a way to provide for their kids and be more careful with their choices? When you get money on a platter of ease you tend to be careless with it, which is why after an almost 10 million investment in their business there is no head or tail. If they had sweated and busted their balls to get the funds they will be more creative, careful and thoughtful in their business choices.

She even got duped of money meant to pursue the job?? How? What happened to due diligence??

Brother J to the rescue when they fvck up, as usual.

Their kids are not yours. Don't allow sentiments cloud good judgement and common sense. Since your main concern is the children, stop making yourself so available for taxation. Find a way to pay the fees of the first one (you're likely going to pay the fees of the remaining four at this rate) by keeping the academic calendar. It's not hard. The boy can get it or even Nairalanders can provide it if he can't. When the fees are due you fire it to his mum and leave at that.

Stop making yourself available. If you can't then stop complaining because you started it by becoming Father Christmas, but then again even Saint Nick comes once a year.

Lol. I read this and thought what a beautiful write up.

I was going to suggest to you to try your hand at writing, scrolled up to see the moniker and almost choked laughing. .


That being said bros J. You are in a cycle with vicious parasites. Yoh have no idea how entitled they feel to your funds till you cut it off.

In my opinion cut them all off for a year. No need for excuses just say I don't have. When they survive the year ( I assure you they will), you will realise you've just been pampering them.

Tou can now give aid as tou deem fit and always 1/4 to 1/2 of the required amount. Never all.



Modified I just read lewstherin's post and put in bold a similar point.

realestniggah:


Don't set her up.. Don't listen to this advise.. If you do you shall continue the cycle of aiding and abetting your cousin, my advise go to that child, that in the university, have a sit down explain thing to him and let him know you shall pay the school fee directly into the school account and if he need anything in future he should contact you directly. Stop depositing money into your cousin account.

I am shocked seeing people suggest he should throw his money into the pit for one last time. Jesus.

This is why we never learn in this country.

OP. Dont stop a dime anymore. It's not your place to set them up which you've tried severely. You have no idea how people see thise with cash. You have plenty why wont you help?

They forget that you hustle hard too. OP if you drop one more dime. It will still be another spin on the wheel.


You'll be back saying sequel to this thread ..

snowking:

The best way to survive is to put up something with a steady income... Take your cousin to MBA Forex office and invest N1,000,000 in her name. She will be paid N150,000 every month. After six months the capital will be returned but make sure you follow her up so she doesn't withdraw and spend all, make sure she reinvest it.. 150k per month should manageably keep her family running and saving you stress.

Is this for real. I would like more info pls.

lavenjcrown:
You have done so great for your cousin. i believe that God really sees your helping heart and he will continue to bless and protect you. please keep doing what you think is best to you and never follow any ones advise. please i'm always in financial need and i would love you to assist me. my acct Detail: ADESINA STEVEN AJIBOLA....... ACCESS/DIAMOND BANK........... 0023830047. Thanks in anticipation.

For real. After he's crying due to the load he is carrying.

Good day Mr J111333,God will continue to bless you and give you good health to help more,,you're a man of kind hearted and you'll never go down,,some people in other families won't bother since they're comfortable on their own.Please do your best for them and God will uplift you more.

I humbly want to get your contact and relate with you if you won't mind sir.,,You can drop your email or number for me or text me on 07061116101.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Have a great day ahead.

God bless you richly.

Kay

armadeo:



Lol. I read this and thought what a beautiful write up.

I was going to suggest to you to try your hand at writing, scrolled up to see the moniker and almost choked laughing. .

Kaypaparino:
Good day Mr J111333,God will continue to bless you and give you good health to help more,,you're a man of kind hearted and you'll never go down,,some people in other families won't bother since they're comfortable on their own.Please do your best for them and God will uplift you more.

I humbly want to get your contact and relate with you if you won't mind sir.,,You can drop your email or number for me or text me on 07061116101.

Hope to hear from you soon.

Have a great day ahead.

God bless you richly.

Kay

Una doh oh. Wehdon sir.

J111333, you need to stop announcing that you are a financial Schwarzenegger. I have warned you in the past about this but you no dey hear word. When you get inundated with requests you start complaining like you are doing now, meanwhile you are the one always putting yourself in awkward situations. You no dey hear word.

Smh.

NarnieSnyper:
You see this churchy ladies/ women. They really piss me the fvck off. You claim to be holy but you have sex any how and bear children like rabbits. If you advise them to do family planning, they'd say it is against their belief. I know this because I have stupîd uncle just like this.

I don't know about you but the earlier you put a stop to this bBS the better because you are now automatically their ATM and for sure baby number 6 is still in her husband's bank awaiting deployment.
I dislike people like this; you have no stable source of income yet you fvck and mass produce kids like it is nothing then start distributing them to relations to cater for them

Nothing wrong in fvcking. It's their right to fvck. However, they should use contraceptives and not breed like rats.

armadeo:


I am shocked seeing people suggest he should throw his money into the pit for one last time. Jesus.

This is why we never learn in this country.

OP. Dont stop a dime anymore. It's not your place to set them up which you've tried severely. You have no idea how people see thise with cash. You have plenty why wont you help?

They forget that you hustle hard too. OP if you drop one more dime. It will still be another spin on the wheel.


You'll be back saying sequel to this thread ..

The OP no dey hear word. He has a Saviour complex

Ishilove:

The OP no dey hear word. He has a Saviour complex

Usually based on experience. His own experiences have made him generous. My experiences have made me hard headed

ornicus:


Usually based on experience. His own experiences have made him generous. My experiences have made me hard headed

My own experiences are making me hard hearted

Ishilove:

Nothing wrong in fvcking. It's their right to fvck. However, they should use contraceptives and not breed like rats.

I didn't say it is wrong. For heaven's sake they are married, so they have every right to it. My point here is, they act like they don't know what sex is yet they tend to always have it(like their lives depend on it) and ignorantly or stupídly start mass producing kids.
If you tell them about contraceptives or family planning, they'll start telling you BS, like it is against their faith, that they can't deny what God has given to them freely else it is an insult to God and then they start bearing children they can't cater for. Isn't that unfair to the innocent kids

Like I said, I have encountered their type more than once

snowking:

The best way to survive is to put up something with a steady income... Take your cousin to MBA Forex office and invest N1,000,000 in her name. She will be paid N150,000 every month. After six months the capital will be returned but make sure you follow her up so she doesn't withdraw and spend all, make sure she reinvest it.. 150k per month should manageably keep her family running and saving you stress.

I just sent you a PM, please reply whenever you can.

You better don't let them dupe you. Find good investments to sink your money into and get married if you are still single. Start building your family as you're building other people's families. A word is enough for the wise

J111333:
I just sent you a PM, please reply whenever you can.

Ishilove:

Did she try to better herself? My own mum got her first degree when we the children were in secondary school, and she got her post graduate degree shortly after I got my own first degree. You aunt really has no excuse for wallowing in illiteracy. She also has no excuse for letting your dad's house get shot to shit_. That is how the one in my father's house in the village stayed in the house for donkey years without paying a dime for rent and expected my dad to pay for even the most basic repairs. When the roof started leaking sometime this year, they called my mega billionaire father to tell him to change the roof. All bills on him. My dad ignored them and stopped picking their calls. Last last they packed out sometime back and didn't even have the courtesy of informing Pops. This is a house they have been living in since the late 80s/early 90s.

If you don't harden your heart to the exploitation of human beings, you will keep being a sucker. Like someone stated up there, the OP has been funding and encouraging their poor choices and bad decisions.

I'm giving my salute to your Mom from here

Saintmary:

I'm giving my salute to your Mom from here

Salute well received

Thanks

hmmmmm

J111333:
I just sent you a PM, please reply whenever you can.

08166397766 did not get your message

armadeo:


Is this for real. I would like more info pls.

MBA Forex uses your funds invested to trade and make profit, paying you 10% to 15% monthly and at the end of 6 months your capital given back to you. From N365,000 to N4,999,999 is 15% monthly, above that is 10% monthly.

snowking:

MBA Forex uses your funds invested to trade and make profit, paying you 10% to 15% monthly and at the end of 6 months your capital given back to you. From N365,000 to N4,999,999 is 15% monthly, above that is 10% monthly.

Banks do this? Pls any links I am very interested.

healthserve:



My own take. Never give people all they ask. If they want 10 million, give them 5 million

If they ask you for financial assistance for projects ask them for the project file that details out execution. And tell them you want to be involved in mentorship role. You can guide their path from slipping off the right path

God bless you

Keep being there for them so long as your income supercedes what goes out


I'm also personally responsible for a community and K ow what it's like being in your shoes.

Priceless Wisdom.

Thanks for commenting

pansophist:
Humans by nature are notoriously known to be exploiters, and it is not in the nature of people, and particularly, your cousin's interest to voluntarily stop fetching from the wellspring of finance that you have positioned yourself to be. You have to put a brute stop to it, you are in charge here, the giver, and it should be on your terms.

What if you drop dead today, or lose your source of income, does it makes it the end of their existence?

Louder pls

midnighter:
Better start prioritising your own investments and stop financing somebody else's stupidity. Call them and tell them you're not paying anything except school fees. Set up a direct debit to the school and make a good contact there

If the tables turn and you can no longer keep up those kids will still grow up to curse that their stupid uncle ...hope you know that?

Since she takes the church more seriously than her life let the church sink more money into the fantastical business.

By the way, the Bible has a lot to say about wise spending. Or she didn't see that side or what

Bunch of selfish pseudo-religious leeches. She took care of you as a child and now you must take care of her as an adult right? Somebody with a husband for that matter.

10 million! 10 million.

I am more concerned about what she's learning from the church which she has made her second home. Ideally, the church is to be a place where she'll meet other people who are supposed to inspire her to get things better in life or is she not seeing or ladies of her kind?


Sometimes I wonder the way some people reason. What's so difficult in putting herself together. Meanwhile, she happens to come from a moderately well to do family cos having an uncle who has invested over 10million to support her step sister is not little privilege at all. Common sense is not common indeed. People make problems out of things which they are not.

Fairview1:


I am more concerned about what she's learning from the church which she has made her second home. Ideally, the church is to be a place where she'll meet other people who are supposed to inspire her to get things better in life or is she not seeing or ladies of her kind?


Sometimes I wonder the way some people reason. What's so difficult in putting herself together. Meanwhile, she happens to come from a moderately well to do family cos having an uncle who has invested over 10million to support her step sister is not little privilege at all. Common sense is not common indeed. People make problems out of things which they are not.

Lol dear, so youve never met those people who just use church as a way of covering up their excesses or escaping from their problems? Church-going can become dangerous if its not done for the right reasons. And it depends on whether they really preach the gospel there or just use it to extort money from the members.

To an extent its not really to do with the church but personal discipline. The OP is sponsoring the lady's lifestyle, so she has never really had to sit up. I am sure that deep down she must feel a little guilty, But the guilt is offset by the fact that she wont have to confront her husband for his unseriousness

She sounds like she married a ne'er-do-well and just let her standards decline until she didnt know where to start improving herself again.

Well, my own is that OP should remove his hand from it.