₦airaland Forum

Am I being controlling just because I ask my boyfriend who his female friends are? I mean he openly shares info about his guys friends, why all the secretiveness about his female friends. He won't answer their calls when I am around, I've had people tell me about seeing him at parties or bars with other females, I took it upon myself to call a few of the girls and was told that he said he was single. We are not married but have been dating for 5 years. I am not opposed to having friends of the opposite sex as I have a few guy friends as well. The difference is that he knows my male friends by name and when they call I answer their calls & chat just as I would if I were alone. If I am going to hang out I tell my boyfriend and sometimes invite him to come along. I am not demanding that he stop having female friends or even that he introduce me to them, only that he can tell me their names and start answering their phone calls and stop acting so shady. He says it is none of my business who his female friends are and he will handle it like a man & says that if any of them ever tried to take it farther he would cut them off, he says I am trying to control him and refuses to tell me any of the friend's names. This is starting to make me wonder, why so secretive & defensive! Am I being controlling? What does his behavior mean?

Paranoia
insecurity

keisha08,

If all what you have said here is true, then he obviously has something to hide.

why take calls from male friends in your prescense and not female friends . . when you are sure he has loads of them?

You have valid reasons to be concerned.

If you are in a serious relationship, then who your partner moves with is surely your business.

But if it is just a fling, then it is a free world.

I dont think you are controlling, it sounds like hes being shady. I mean you are open why cant he be open. Ask him how he would feel if you were to do the same thing that hes doing.

I actually did ask him how he would feel if other guys were calling me at 2 in the morning & I kept ignoring their phone calls or if someone told him I was at the club with another guy & I hadn't told him. He says it would be fine as long as I am not messing around with the guys.

Keisha, you'are a white chick yea ? ahaha! manage his behavior. He loves you. Stop asking him questions, he's a good guy, and if you don't trust him, MOVE ON.

^^^

what has black or white got to do with this?

obowunmi:
Keisha, you'are a white chick yea ? ahaha! manage his behavior. He loves you. Stop asking him questions, he's a good guy, and if you don't trust him, MOVE ON.

This has got to be the funniest advice I have read in years.

@poster, he is most def hidding something from you.

keisha08:
I actually did ask him how he would feel if other guys were calling me at 2 in the morning & I kept ignoring their phone calls or if someone told him I was at the club with another guy & I hadn't told him. He says it would be fine as long as I am not messing around with the guys.

Fair play, MUCH!

Roki baby --- how are you today, my Liberian friend?

I am fine thank you.

Lol. I sure say no be only my mind wey dey do clock work here. Be lik say our bros don dey do small runs. Maybe na im personal gal 4 dis way wey dey ring am. Sharp man don dey plan on how im go grab wetin im take enter run. Later im go bring over im gal. Kai!

Your man is definitely hiding something frm you