Like, why does it seems hard for people to get husband/wife. Is it really suppose to be so? Or we are propably being too watchful or maybe judgemental or maybe too careful?

I'll be talking about Africa and Nigeria precisely here, you know i read alot, magazines, pamphlets and all mostly sometimes foreign. Most of the times i read about this westerners getting married at age 18, 19 and co, i mostly ask myself why that is a bit hard to achieve down here. I remember this son of a pastor, he finished his study abroad, return home and got married, he was just 21. People were talking here and there about how he wasn't ripe for marriage bla bla bla, when exactly would he be ready for marriage? @ 35 when he probably fornicate away his destiny?


When it comes to marriage and all, i think the muslims are doing better, they get married as early as they can, they are living the right purpose of creation, they don't leave in delusional unlike their xtian counterpart, no matter how hard situations are, they still get to get together into it rather than fornicating around praying to God to show them right spouse, praying to God to pick their calls and all that. Well this is not religious something sha.

And also, i've seen times without numbers on this forum how girls always advice the ones amidst them ready for marriage to start looking out for men above 32 and all when in the right sense an 18 year old man is old enough to take consequence for his own action so why setting that high age for marriage?

There was this man in my neighborhood then, he should be almost or exactly 40 years, he told me then how he was busy chasing better life then while he ignored girls and all thinking he'd be soooo rich someway somehow and so he can get married before or at the most 32 years, then at 40, he wasn't a millionaire self and then struggling to find a lady he could convince because he wanted younger ladies @ 28 and all but he also seems too old for his specs.

I have lots of stories like that to tell but that's not the reason for this thread.

What i'm asking is, should he really be that hard to find someone to marry? Shoud people really struggle to get a spouse?

Do not forget there is a Psychological side to such things as marriage

There is also a spiritual side

There is also a cultural side

And the commonly known financial side to marriage.

So how do you think you can find one answer.. My dear, you can't o.

Everyone has their own side.

The struggle is because of our tradition makes marriage a do or die affair.... We do not have notable people who are not married yet very successful.... So everyone seem to think marriage is progress and success.... Without knowing it is hard work and a slowdown on life.


Marriage is good but not for every body. We also think a marriage is not successful unless kids are born.... Meanwhile in developed countries.... Children are optional even in marriage.

When a concept is too magnified it become hard to achieve.

Ladylite:
Do not forget there is a Psychological side to such things as marriage

There is also a spiritual side

There is also a cultural side

And the commonly known financial side to marriage.

So how do you think you can find one answer.. My dear, you can't o.

Everyone has their own side.

The struggle is because of our tradition makes marriage a do or die affair.... We do not have notable people who are not married yet very successful.... So everyone seem to think marriage is progress and success.... Without knowing it is hard work and a slowdown on life.


Marriage is good but not for every body. We also think a marriage is not successful unless kids are born.... Meanwhile in developed countries.... Children are optional even in marriage.

When a concept is too magnified it become hard to achieve.

I'm glad you get to see it the Nigerian way like me.

Those sides (Spiritual, Cutural) are for those ruled by those two and for the financial side, it ain't suppose to b issue unless one or the two parties wasn't on the right path prior marriage.

And as for notable people, i wouldn't see it that way, if you are doing things because people are doing it and not because you see the neccessity then it's not worth it.

Marriage is for everybody also, man was created for the sole purpose of procreation and since God Himself forbids fornication then it must happen that He wanted marriage so His purpose can be fulfillled. Except in the case where a person doesn't believe in God. But well, you can talk of a situation where a person also make it optional just like some married folks make children optional too.

Not because we are too judgemental but the country itself is not helping the young lad, people don't get to marry who love because every single thing is hard to find... Just create jobs, have basic amenities for the masses and you will see people marrying at young. Everybody go DEy alright but as e b so the language is go and hustle, by the time you will be on hustling process you supposed lover don drop like two and at the age of 30 you still dey find your footing... Las Las na God dey bless man

Many people, especially men, desire to get married but their financial situation is very poor and no woman wants to settle down with a struggling man. That’s why there are so many single ladies and men.

maak400:
Many people, especially men, desire to get married but their financial situation is very poor and no woman wants to settle down with a struggling man. That’s why there are so many single ladies and men.

says who?

Marriage is for insecure men and women.

''N kan ti o n be leyin efa oju eje lo''
''ti eyan o ba to baba omo se, ko ni ipe omo alakara''
''a ti gbeyawo o soro, owo obe lo ju''
interpreter to English please
the issue of marriage is global phenomenon

Like, why does it seems hard for people to get husband/wife. Is it really suppose to be so? Or we are propably being too watchful or maybe judgemental or maybe too careful?

Possibly, especially too judgemental.

Sometimes, unrealistic, turning down potential partners for one reason or another.

Marrying early or late has nothing to do with
CHRISTIANITY or ISLAM

MrHistorian:
Marriage is for insecure men and women.

And fornication is for secured men and women... Right??

ariyebaba:
''N kan ti o n be leyin efa oju eje lo''

''ti eyan o ba to baba omo se, ko ni ipe omo alakara''

''a ti gbeyawo o soro, owo obe lo ju''

interpreter to English please

the issue of marriage is global phenomenon

Who wan Interprete am for.... Common gerraroye

People in the western countries do not get married that early lol most 18/19's are thinking of getting into colledge lol and after colledge they think of living the most of there lives they don't even care about marraige the way we AFRICANS do and uh any married 19 yearold you find must have gotten a girl pregnant to get married that early.Oh and no not even a 22 year old is Fully responsible enough to take care of a family , if they can't even keep a normal relationship then you think they could keep a marraige?! And for the north thats just really bad bc i know most of the women are being forced to get married at such young age (jsyk the age of consent in nigeria is 8 years lol bc those islams have 8year olds as wives which is really horrible) , nobody would wanna get married early , everybody wants to live the most of life before having a family. For me it dosent really matter how old you are (except you're below 18) all that matters is that you are happy with it .

Kapeter:
I'm glad you get to see it the Nigerian way like me.

Those sides (Spiritual, Cutural) are for those ruled by those two and for the financial side, it ain't suppose to b issue unless one or the two parties wasn't on the right path prior marriage.

And as for notable people, i wouldn't see it that way, if you are doing things because people are doing it and not because you see the neccessity then it's not worth it.

Marriage is for everybody also, man was created for the sole purpose of procreation and since God Himself forbids fornication then it must happen that He wanted marriage so His purpose can be fulfillled. Except in the case where a person doesn't believe in God. But well, you can talk of a situation where a person also make it optional just like some married folks make children optional too.

Marriage isn't for everyone. Personal choices do count.

The sole purpose of marriage as instituted by God was companionship. See the Bible book of Genesis 2:18