| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by LadySarah: 5:06am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Born2Breed:
She collected her money back right?
Bros, dey quick pay your debt and make more money. Money stops nonsense. chai'!I understand You but You put it the wrong way.Even Dangote owes. 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Nicklaus619(m): 5:17am On Dec 08, 2019 |
I feel your pains bro, you should call for a family meeting,explain to your mother what happened she caused everything when she gave her the impression not to respect you as you are just a little older than her, cry if you must to clear your head, stop eating in the house, but always provide for the family,minimize irrelevant chitty chatty with your sister, Lastly, move out of the house I wouldn't advise you dis but if I am in your shoes ayam going old school on her butt AMA whop respect into her ASAP  1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by LordKO(m): 5:51am On Dec 08, 2019 |
You've a chauvinistic mother, that's the root of the problem, and she's indoctrinated and inculcated its associated negative values into your sister. You've frenemies in both of them.
Nevertheless, continue to be good to them mostly from a distance and stop expecting from them understanding and ecstatic feelings as you ought to gain/experience from selfless and meek relations in their position in your life.
You've to bear in mind that whatever good thing they may do for you at any point in time in life can never come from the place of selflessness - any of such good thing will always have self-interest overtone. If you eventually amass big wealth, they'll be the first set of people to take to worshipping you - superficial love.
Blood makes people related, but mutual ethical leanings make people lovers or family or intimate friends. 5 Likes |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Techcrunchng(m): 7:31am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Depressed101:
Nairalanders pls come to my rescue as I have always come to people's rescue in topics related to co-existing with other people..
I am the first son of my family, I have a sister who is one year younger than I am.
For a very long time now, in fact from time immemorial, my mother has always taught my sister that it is
"ONLY ONE YEAR GAP BETWEEN THE BOTH OF US" - SO THEFORE THE SENIOR RESPECT THAT SHOULD BE ACCORDED TO ME SHOULD BE MINIMAL.
So fast forward to today. I am owing her some money for about two months now. And promised to pay her infact I have paid half of the money despite all the expenses on me in the family. She asked me to give her part of the money today, I told her I didn't have money, that the 15k with me is not mine. That I will give her 3k to hold hand, even tho it will cause me great inconveniences. She threatened to take the money, the whole 15k. I told her to stop that nonsense and I went to the bathroom to take my bath. On coming out of the bathroom, I noticed that my wallet was tempered with. The 15k Is no where to be found. I asked my Lil sis, she said it was sister that touched it.. I ran outside with my towel, and called out to my sister, but she walked off without turning back...
I cried inside my heart, because I know she didn't really need that money right then... I felt bitter, I don't even know what to do.... I found a way to sort for another 15k.
This is not the first time she has done something of similar behavior, and I brushed it off, afterall she's my sister...
Right now I am outside a beer parlour watching a match and typing this.. I am not feeling fine at all.. I am feeling bitter. Until now I always forget quickly what they do to me...
I don't know how to confront her when I get home. Whether to caution her verbally, or give her a slap.. Whether to keep mute and suck it up as usual and wait for when I am ready leave that house cos I understand that too much familiarity can breed disrespect. I have plans to leave before January.
What should I do..
I live with my mother and this sister and other of my little siblings. And I pay the house rent of where we live. but paying an owed money like that is wicked and annoying so you caused everything yourself. 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Lonelypacifist6: 8:00am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Depressed101:
she knows this, I don't know why they are doing this... In fact I called my mum immediately that incidence happened, and told her to call my sister to return the money as the money is not mine... She disconnected the call saying she was busy. Op leave that house your efforts are not appreciated, and stop paying for the accommodation. What kind of mother is too busy to hear complaints from her children  their character alone is enough for your moniker. 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Lonelypacifist6: 8:05am On Dec 08, 2019 |
KiidaACE:
Hold it and leave.. Complaining is always useless and will only make you more angry..
It's a shame though that "see finish" also exists amongst blood related family members but know this; your absence will surely be felt and absence makes the heart grow fonder..
Just finish up your plans, move out and polish your life.. They're still family at the end of the day though so try to call in from time to time..
And your sister still def needs a talk from you.. I suggest you sit her down and talk one last sense into her just before you leave..
Your mum is at fault in all this; putting such ideas into her head, what was she even thinking?..
Sometimes you just don't understand women, I'll never disrespect my elder brothers, just two years and four years difference, I'm the last. we call ourselves sir/Mr. because we grew up hearing it from our parents. 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by franklingud(m): 8:09am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Bros, am telling you from experience.
Are you the only male child in your family?
If yes then quickly find a room and pack out of that house for them. ASAP
These females can make you do the unthinkable. Very annoying set of people.
Unreasonable, impatient! 2 Likes |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Lonelypacifist6: 8:15am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Depressed101:
thank you very much for your thoughtful words, I feel relieved now DON'T EVER DISCLOSE YOUR PLANS OF MOVING OUT. 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Lonelypacifist6: 8:15am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Depressed101:
thank you very much for your thoughtful words, I feel relieved now |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Lonelypacifist6: 8:18am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Nicklaus619:
I feel your pains bro, you should call for a family meeting,explain to your mother what happened she caused everything when she gave her the impression not to respect you as you are just a little older than her, cry if you must to clear your head, stop eating in the house, but always provide for the family,minimize irrelevant chitty chatty with your sister,
Lastly, move out of the house
I wouldn't advise you dis but if I am in your shoes ayam going old school on her butt AMA whop respect into her ASAP Op, don't do this, they'll make a mockery of you unless those women aren't in the meeting, surprise is the best in a situation like this just ghost them leave the house, they'll learn. |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Lonelypacifist6: 8:21am On Dec 08, 2019 |
LordKO:
You've a chauvinistic mother, that's the root of the problem, and she's indoctrinated and inculcated its associated negative values into your sister. You've frenemies in both of them.
Nevertheless, continue to be good to them mostly from a distance and stop expecting from them understanding and ecstatic feelings as you ought to gain/experience from selfless and meek relations in their position in your life.
You've to bear in mind that whatever good thing they may do for you at any point in time in life can never come from the place of selflessness - any of such good thing will always have self-interest overtone. If you eventually amass big wealth, they'll be the first set of people to take to worshipping you - superficial love.
Blood makes people related, but mutual ethical leanings make people lovers or family or intimate friends.
You hit the nail on the head. 3 Likes |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by zmpp(f): 8:56am On Dec 08, 2019 |
it is well, forgive her 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by DonBenny77(m): 9:06am On Dec 08, 2019 |
If you must borrow always try to pay your debt on time  1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by YorubaLord: 9:11am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Depressed101:
that's all you could say..? OP craze dey worry you. On top that, carry hot water pour for her head na... since you dey act like say the subtle advise no dey enough. 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by najib632(m): 9:18am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Depressed101:
My brother I have vowed never to have anything to do with my sister concerning finance, this last debt, my mother was the one that coerced me into taking it, that afterall she was my sister. I tried to explain to her the incidence I've had with her before.. But because of the urgency of the situation, I had to take the money...
Meanwhile I always come through for her as a brother in times of needs, so I expect her to come through for me...
With all this stuffs I don't think we will ever have good bloods.. you have to show your mum and sister that you're really angry with them. If possible start eating outside or reduce the amount of food you consume at home. You to show both them that they must treat you as the man of the house since your father is no more or infact just live the house without informing them if they don't change. This is really annoying, as if you chose to be broke. 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Yxxx: 9:20am On Dec 08, 2019 |
First you must gain back your respect.
How?
Become cold,like become cold.
People are saying don't owe again,pay your debt.
If you are paying rent and you are being treated like this ,imagine if you don't have at all.
Put them in their place,remember the younger ones are watching.
You see that your sister if you need to reset her brain small by giving her a once in a lifetime scolding with much fury showing(remember to do it well but without injuries).
It will linger in her memory,she won't try shit next time.
Your mum too, you have to be tough on her. Ignore her in some decision making process,act firm,make her understand it's not business as usual, eat outside if possible.
Then finally leave the house.
Na dem go find you come respectfully but you have to gain your respect.
You have to act fast for future purpose. |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by frozen70(f): 9:27am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Depressed101:
Nairalanders pls come to my rescue as I have always come to people's rescue in topics related to co-existing with other people..
I am the first son of my family, I have a sister who is one year younger than I am.
For a very long time now, in fact from time immemorial, my mother has always taught my sister that it is
"ONLY ONE YEAR GAP BETWEEN THE BOTH OF US" - SO THEFORE THE SENIOR RESPECT THAT SHOULD BE ACCORDED TO ME SHOULD BE MINIMAL.
So fast forward to today. I am owing her some money for about two months now. And promised to pay her infact I have paid half of the money despite all the expenses on me in the family. She asked me to give her part of the money today, I told her I didn't have money, that the 15k with me is not mine. That I will give her 3k to hold hand, even tho it will cause me great inconveniences. She threatened to take the money, the whole 15k. I told her to stop that nonsense and I went to the bathroom to take my bath. On coming out of the bathroom, I noticed that my wallet was tempered with. The 15k Is no where to be found. I asked my Lil sis, she said it was sister that touched it.. I ran outside with my towel, and called out to my sister, but she walked off without turning back...
I cried inside my heart, because I know she didn't really need that money right then... I felt bitter, I don't even know what to do.... I found a way to sort for another 15k.
This is not the first time she has done something of similar behavior, and I brushed it off, afterall she's my sister...
Right now I am outside a beer parlour watching a match and typing this.. I am not feeling fine at all.. I am feeling bitter. Until now I always forget quickly what they do to me...
I don't know how to confront her when I get home. Whether to caution her verbally, or give her a slap.. Whether to keep mute and suck it up as usual and wait for when I am ready leave that house cos I understand that too much familiarity can breed disrespect. I have plans to leave before January.
What should I do..
I live with my mother and this sister and other of my little siblings. And I pay the house rent of where we live. Sorry for the hurt It's time for you to start your own life if being separated with your own apartment It might not sound easy but a bold step will make you plan well You don't need to confront her, just be yourself and never ever borrow from her so tgat you won't experience rancour because your mum will take side with her Start saving to have your own apartment and if the present rent expires, you and them can share the bill or they look for a smaller apartment since you have packed out Don't quarrel vabaly with her but keep her at arms length and still relate with them all 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Nicklaus619(m): 9:31am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Lonelypacifist6:
Op, don't do this, they'll make a mockery of you unless those women aren't in the meeting, surprise is the best in a situation like this just ghost them leave the house, they'll learn. Let them make mockery that wat families is for, they make you they break you and at last u can't do without them Family is forever and one day dey all gonna look back and laugh. But his moving out of the house should not be negotiable 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Born2Breed(f): 9:44am On Dec 08, 2019 |
LadySarah:
chai'!I understand You but You put it the wrong way.Even Dangote owes. Yes everyone owes,but you don't flaunt money in front of your creditor. The bros is only telling us his own side of the story. Women are always kind hearted and care more for their brothers. For the mum to even cut the call on him means there is something Bros is not revealing here. 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Nobody: 11:03am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Lonelypacifist6:
Sometimes you just don't understand women, I'll never disrespect my elder brothers, just two years and four years difference, I'm the last. we call ourselves sir/Mr. because we grew up hearing it from our parents. Same as my family bro.. My parents made sure to hammer the importance of respect to an elder sibling even if the difference is just a year and we haven't departed from it.. My siblings and I have a very tight bond with a clear hierarchy in place.. This doesn't stop us from loving each other and I'd take a bullet anytime anyday for anyone of em... Women are the ones that are mostly responsible for how a child is gonna turn out and they should do well to teach em well lest they become monsters in the near future.. 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Lonelypacifist6: 11:11am On Dec 08, 2019 |
KiidaACE:
Same as my family bro.. My parents made sure to hammer the importance of respect to an elder sibling even if the difference is just a year and we haven't departed from it.. My siblings and I have a very tight bond with a clear hierarchy in place.. This doesn't stop us from loving each other and I'd take a bullet anytime anyday for anyone of em...
Women are the ones that are mostly responsible for how a child is gonna turn out and they should do well to teach em well lest they become monsters in the near future.. Same here too my brothers have saved my ass many atime especially from financial ruin, They both have Foreign nationality and I'll gladly do the same for them in 2017 was the time I knew I had people who love me, Only thing they couldn't save me from was a woman, I'm sure if they saw signs they would have warned me. 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by VanillaIce5(f): 11:19am On Dec 08, 2019 |
Have u complained to your mother before about this things 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Xmen149(m): 12:33pm On Dec 08, 2019 |
Depressed101:
Nairalanders pls come to my rescue as I have always come to people's rescue in topics related to co-existing with other people..
I am the first son of my family, I have a sister who is one year younger than I am.
For a very long time now, in fact from time immemorial, my mother has always taught my sister that it is
"ONLY ONE YEAR GAP BETWEEN THE BOTH OF US" - SO THEFORE THE SENIOR RESPECT THAT SHOULD BE ACCORDED TO ME SHOULD BE MINIMAL.
So fast forward to today. I am owing her some money for about two months now. And promised to pay her infact I have paid half of the money despite all the expenses on me in the family. She asked me to give her part of the money today, I told her I didn't have money, that the 15k with me is not mine. That I will give her 3k to hold hand, even tho it will cause me great inconveniences. She threatened to take the money, the whole 15k. I told her to stop that nonsense and I went to the bathroom to take my bath. On coming out of the bathroom, I noticed that my wallet was tempered with. The 15k Is no where to be found. I asked my Lil sis, she said it was sister that touched it.. I ran outside with my towel, and called out to my sister, but she walked off without turning back...
I cried inside my heart, because I know she didn't really need that money right then... I felt bitter, I don't even know what to do.... I found a way to sort for another 15k.
This is not the first time she has done something of similar behavior, and I brushed it off, afterall she's my sister...
Right now I am outside a beer parlour watching a match and typing this.. I am not feeling fine at all.. I am feeling bitter. Until now I always forget quickly what they do to me...
I don't know how to confront her when I get home. Whether to caution her verbally, or give her a slap.. Whether to keep mute and suck it up as usual and wait for when I am ready leave that house cos I understand that too much familiarity can breed disrespect. I have plans to leave before January.
What should I do..
I live with my mother and this sister and other of my little siblings. And I pay the house rent of where we live. Play on it it's on her conscience,she knows she has wronged you even though you owed her. dnt confront her,when its time you leave..she is automatically one financial problem less for you with what ua making bcs it will always be at the back of her mind..Pride no go gree am Las Las Na u go win 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by FromZeroToHero(m): 12:51pm On Dec 08, 2019 |
If a snake doesn't do what makes it a snake small children will use it as a rope to tie firewood. A word is enough for the wise. 2 Likes |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Nobody: 2:01pm On Dec 08, 2019 |
Lonelypacifist6:
Same here too my brothers have saved my ass my atime especially from financial ruin, They both have Foreign nationality and I'll gladly do the same for them in 2017 was the time I knew I had people who love me, Only thing they couldn't save me from was a woman, I'm sure if they saw signs they would have warned me . Lmao, sure they would've... 1 Like |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Depressed101: 3:39pm On Dec 08, 2019 |
Thanks to everyone who contributed to this issue....
I have resolved not to take it out on her or even caution her afterall i am the debtor.
She slept at a friend's place yesterday. I dont know if she was afraid of what i did do.
I just wish she realises that i am a brother sooner... Once again, thank you guys. |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Depressed101: 3:47pm On Dec 08, 2019 |
Lonelypacifist6:
Op, don't do this, they'll make a mockery of you unless those women aren't in the meeting, surprise is the best in a situation like this just ghost them leave the house, they'll learn. Hmmm. I have indeed called meeting before, but as usual they didn't take it serious... |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Depressed101: 3:48pm On Dec 08, 2019 |
franklingud:
Bros, am telling you from experience.
Are you the only male child in your family?
If yes then quickly find a room and pack out of that house for them. ASAP
These females can make you do the unthinkable. Very annoying set of people.
Unreasonable, impatient!
i am not, i have other male brothers, but they are still in secondary school.. Indeed moving out is inevitable |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Depressed101: 3:50pm On Dec 08, 2019 |
Techcrunchng:
but paying an owed money like that is wicked and annoying so you caused everything yourself. i was broke i am not one to owe money for long. |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Depressed101: 3:53pm On Dec 08, 2019 |
LordKO:
You've a chauvinistic mother, that's the root of the problem, and she's indoctrinated and inculcated its associated negative values into your sister. You've frenemies in both of them.
Nevertheless, continue to be good to them mostly from a distance and stop expecting from them understanding and ecstatic feelings as you ought to gain/experience from selfless and meek relations in their position in your life.
You've to bear in mind that whatever good thing they may do for you at any point in time in life can never come from the place of selflessness - any of such good thing will always have self-interest overtone. If you eventually amass big wealth, they'll be the first set of people to take to worshipping you - superficial love.
Blood makes people related, but mutual ethical leanings make people lovers or family or intimate friends.
she has always been the first person to come close to me when everything is smooth,this is someone I love so much, i can't hate her. |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by Depressed101: 3:55pm On Dec 08, 2019 |
Nicklaus619:
I feel your pains bro, you should call for a family meeting,explain to your mother what happened she caused everything when she gave her the impression not to respect you as you are just a little older than her, [b]cry if you must to clear your head, [/b]stop eating in the house, but always provide for the family,minimize irrelevant chitty chatty with your sister,
Lastly, move out of the house
I wouldn't advise you dis but if I am in your shoes ayam going old school on her butt AMA whop respect into her ASAP i have cried before, i don't think i want yo cry again. The plan is to move ahead, and make my other siblings especially the boys dont take after them. |
| Re: How Long Should Should I Have Patient With My Sister by adidasBarca: 4:25pm On Dec 08, 2019 |
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