cococandy:
I won’t encourage anyone to be irresponsible. Sex does come with a lot of baggage so one must engage wisely. But I will encourage responsible exploration only in ADULTS and with protection. You will get old one day. Your body will die. Your lungs will fail. Your heart will stop beating (I could go on). But the only life you have is one you have LIVED and all the types of orgasms that happened in it.

Are we going to tell a 30+ year old man or woman to keep depriving themselves of sexual pleasure until they find a wife or husband?

If I knew then what I know now, I personally wouldn’t have held out as long as I did and definitely would have felt no guilt engaging in sex outside of marriage. I did feel guilty then because my mind was still colonized.

Shame of having sex with someone you’re not married to is unhealthy. If you’re adult enough to do it, enjoy it and move on. Unless you’re ashamed of the person you chose to do it with. It happens .

Obviously not speaking from a Christian point of view so please no one should quote the Bible for me.

As for whether it’s better outside of marriage or inside of it, y’all can’t seriously expect a consensus on that.
Depends on what you want out of it and how well you and your partner or partners are synced.

OP someone you’re married to can still dump you
And a lady can also have sex in her house leaving the man to do the walk of shame back to the house, office or bus right?

This is deep.

I agree 101% with you

Nice one @Op

there is alot of difference. plenty for that matte. sex in marriage is beautiful. Its also a responsibility that must be fulfilled

OgaMadam:
Dear Married Couples,

Just want to talk about the difference between having sexual intercourse in a marital / covenant relationship and otherwise.

Is sex better between two people who have pledged to live their lives together in holy matrimony?

What are your views.

(Not out of judgement cause I have also been there. But when it is in marriage there is no guilt or the feeling that he might dump you or that
you have to do the "walk of shame" as a lady back to your house, office or bus. Being home all day is beautiful.

I want to thank the LORD for His precious gift of sexual intimacy within marriage. Theres nothing quite like giving God room to bless you in that area. Sex truly is a gift meant for marriage)

There. Thanks

Personally, sex outside marriage makes me uncomfortable. In church, I used to feel like an impostor, an unrepentant sinner since I was still going back to it. I used to think, if I die today na hellfire straight o, no detour. Lol

When you are married, you can do and undo without fear or guilt.

This guilt/uneasiness is one of the reasons why I've been celibate. My spirit is at peace.

[quote author=bukatyne post = 84828662]

Ogini?
@Bold:
I can't relate.
@ the OP: There is a guilt that comes with extra-martial sex if you have an active conscience.

It really hit me one Holy Communion service after NYSC where I wept like a babe in church and confessed all my sins and decided to end my relationship of 6yrs plus.

Thank God for the wise elders whom surrounded me. When I told my cos the blunder I had done ending my relationship, he quickly told me to reconcile and advise what to do.

A pastor who was serious on keeping the marriage bed undefiled told me in clear terms that what we needed was a job so we could get married asap.

His own pastor too gave very good counsel and it was beautiful in the end.
[quote]



@ your post? Okay human beings are really different and have varying outlooks to life For instance defile is what I think paedophiles and rapists and perverts do, to helpless others and is such a dirty word and totally unrelated to “natural” sex.
God must be having a blast with the myriad of people and the vast array of human interactions in existence

Shouldn't this be in sexuality section btw?

[quote author=merahki post=84837434][/quote]

Ok.

crackhaus:

I like this woman, she will hardly disappoint...

Didn't I say I want to read your own?
Na so jor.

What were you looking for?

bukatyne:


What were you looking for?

Your pre-marital sexcapade.
The extra bits about your guilt, eventual acceptance, and overall involvement of people helping sort it out, made it so much more fulfilling to read.

crackhaus:

Your pre-marital sexcapade.
The extra bits about your guilt, eventual acceptance, and overall involvement of people helping sort it out, made it so much more fulfilling to read.

Sexcapade ke?

Makes it seem I was bed hopping.

Biko o!

bukatyne:


Sexcapade ke?

Makes it seem I was bed hopping.

Biko o!

Sexcapades can be had with one person using different styles, positions, and methods.