Ifyjos:
I’m squatting with my guy and his friends. I do have uncles ( my mum brothers) they are not the the type of person who like to make peace because they will add more fuel to the problem. I deserved everything for my bad actions , I’m deeply sorry for hurting my sister and they all hate me but right now all I want is my daughter

Pls, as you stay with him, don't allow him to have any sexual intercourse with you. Both of you should be in sober reflection.

If I may ask, what was his reaction towards your confession.

CeterisXVII:

Character assassination in what way? The sister scolded her inside their house. So the best way to respond to the so-called character assassination was to launch a physical assault against the sister??

Didn't you read that it was a continuous lash each time she sees the both of them... Who does that? That was way too much... When a man is pushed to the wall for so long the reaction is disastrous...

She got exactly what she wanted...
Make she taste that side of life too...

Ginaruby:


Didn't you read that it was a continuous lash each time she sees the both of them... Who does that? That was way too much... When a man is pushed to the wall for so long the reaction is disastrous...

She got exactly what she wanted...
Make she taste that side of life too...

you are very irresponsible for supporting this.
Irresponsible toad.

Ifyjos:
I was 14 and very matured , i almost 21 in March . It’s not a pedophile because age it’s just a number, if it was a pedophile why he is not in prison then? You can say whatever you like about him , am not bothered because I still love him and your words is making me loving even more. I can sense jealousy because u don’t even have a guy in your life and konji and ulcer has been killing you that’s why you are talking rubbish

I have been following this thread but I just have to comment. Ifyjos, I really pity you now because your ignorance is out of this world. You really need a THERAPY cos you have lost your senses (don't take it as insult). Pls fellow NAIRALANDERS this girl needs help urgently. Chai, your future is at stake here. Calm down ooo before you commit murder. I now understand why your replies has been this way. You need to check in with a THERAPIST urgently. And my dear stop calling God ooo, you don't know Him at all. Oluwa gba wa lowo omo iya oran.

Thank you very much I will go to my mum church on Sunday and see if I can talk with her pastor or his wife

Abcruz:



This is a good step in the right direction. Finally I salute your courage for doing the right thing.

We all make mistakes but taking corrections and acting on wise counsel is the only remedy for a peaceful coexistence.

It is normal for your family members to be angry with you as it appears very shocking to them at the moment. However, they'll accept you back after a while. As for your daughter you'll be with her soon but while you're away, I can assure you she won't be treated badly.

All you have to do now is to go over to the church your family attends, meet the pastor or any elder your mum and dad respects explain to him/her and ask him/her to follow you and beg for their forgiveness.

My prayers are with you!

No comment about sex because we are a couple and it can happen anytime. My guy doesn’t know i confess and coming to stay with him I gave him other reasons. my family disowns me and he is the only one I have now on this world and I don’t want him to leave me because I don’t have anywhere else to go. I just pray that my family will be able to have a place in their heart to forgive me for all the pains I have caused them so things can go back to normal again

comtem2011:
Pls, as you stay with him, don't allow him to have any sexual intercourse with you. Both of you should be in sober reflection.

If I may ask, what was his reaction towards your confession.

@Ifyjos. Things will not be normal unless you change. Can you wait till Sunday before seeing your Pastors,not even during midweek service or so? For someone that really wants to be with her daughter I was thinking you'd be desperate to get people to help talk to your sister but seems you are becoming relaxed and comfy... And why are you scared of telling your guy that you've confessed? Don't build any relationship on the foundation of lies,get to know his reaction now.

He is my mum pastor I don’t even attend the church and the problem is from my guy place is very far from the church and I don’t know his visiting hours so I taught Sunday morning will be best because I know the services time I can see him after church he will allow me. If you know how much I want to be with my child right now I can do anything that will cause any problem that’s why I don’t want to commit another mistake , I want to take things with patience and in a right way. I have learnt my lesson and I don’t want it to be repeated

SlimBrawnie:
@Ifyjos. Things will not be normal unless you change. Can you wait till Sunday before seeing your Pastors,not even during midweek service or so? For someone that really wants to be with her daughter I was thinking you'd be desperate to get people to help talk to your sister but seems you are becoming relaxed and comfy... And why are you scared of telling your guy that you've confessed? Don't build any relationship on the foundation of lies,get to know his reaction now.

Ifyjos:
No comment about sex because we are a couple and it can happen anytime. My guy doesn’t know i confess and coming to stay with him I gave him other reasons. my family disowns me and he is the only one I have now on this world and I don’t want him to leave me because I don’t have anywhere else to go. I just pray that my family will be able to have a place in their heart to forgive me for all the pains I have caused them so things can go back to normal again

ok hanty

Ifyjos:
No comment about sex because we are a couple and it can happen anytime. My guy doesn’t know i confess and coming to stay with him I gave him other reasons. my family disowns me and he is the only one I have now on this world and I don’t want him to leave me because I don’t have anywhere else to go. I just pray that my family will be able to have a place in their heart to forgive me for all the pains I have caused them so things can go back to normal again

has he paid your dowry? has your parents given you to him? have you wedded? Because you have a child for him does not automatically translate to him being your husband.

Ok

ffo:

has he paid your dowry? has your parents given you to him? have you wedded? Because you have a child for him does not automatically translate to him being your husband.

Ifyjos:
She doesn't care about me because if she did want the best for me , she would would support me and my guy to be together and establish a business for us instead she wanted me to break up with him to become a single mom as if she would have marry me or even take care of my child the way her father does. That's something she cannot do because theres nobody that will take care of my child like her father. He has better plans but things are just difficult for him. He is a good man he can never ask me to kill any of my relatives because If that was the case then it would have kill my sister long time ago and I'm not stupid to do such things. Yes I know what we did was wrong but we only wanted revenge for her to feel the pain that she has been causing us but I just realised that it was the wrong path to take , which I'm regretting but that doesn't make us bad people please
quote author=Wetlink post=85595381]You have a very cold heart Op. I fear who no fear you.
Any reasonable person in your sisters shoes will be mad at your boyfriend or were you expecting her to pat him on the back for putting her 15year old little sister In a family way?

Your sister genuinely cares about you and that's why she'll still opt to pay your baby's school fees yet you and your, 'good' boyfriend paid her back this way[code]

If this story is anything to go by then I'm really worried about YOU.
this boyfriend of yours Is a terrible influence. I fear that one day, he may suggest you kill anyone who is against your relationship and you will gladly oblige because to you, he has your interest at heart.

My heart bleeds for you, my heart indeed bleeds.

You are a poisonous snake !
Get ready for what is coming to you, because all our actions have consequences .

BRATISLAVA:

The only person who can go with her to apologise is the one who stole her childhood, that she calls "crown". He's a "good guy". If they want the child he knows how to fight for it. She can sit on them and hold down their hands while he gives them "respectful beatings" and collects the child.

She still maintains that her sister isn't fertile(how does she know this? A lot of things she's not saying that she did), is still bitterly jealous of her (great jealousy and hatred), she probably said all those things to her, has probably not apologized for beating her elder sister with her man(she's still justifying it). The remorse isn't real. It's just the fear of being homeless(a fact she keeps repeating, ironic). But the good news is that she's now with her *good guy". The one who looked lustfully at a 14 year old. The one who she idolized above her sister who truly loved her.
We should be kept informed on what's going to happen to all the love she used as a reason to be unkind to her sister, now that they will actually live together. All the warts will show. Very immature to claim he loves her when she had never lived together with him before. Now they will be in close quarters, what "love" it shall be, and he will have to face up to what her sister and parents were doing that they both never appreciated. "Love". "Maturity".
35 pages of advice, hopefully she has truly repented never to do evil again. But can the leopard change it's spots? She fears they will do evil to her child because she would do evil in their position. She should be happy nobody is smoking and doing drugs around the child.

Her elder sister will rise and return bigger and better than before. It's a pity her trial was from the enemy within.

So sad

Ehibiggirl:
you are very irresponsible for supporting this.
Irresponsible toad.

I have seen how irresponsible toad's react for the first time in my life... Thanks for coming through...

Your view about life must not be same as everyone at all time so learn to respect other peoples view if you intend to have a happy relationship with people...

Learn to always present your arguments without insulting people...

Ginaruby:


I have seen how irresponsible toad's react for the first time in my life... Thanks for coming through...

Your view about life must not be same as everyone at all time so learn to respect other peoples view if you intend to have a happy relationship with people...

Learn to always present your arguments without insulting people...

sorry I called you a toad Oga. But I can imagine your own relationships with people when you strongly supported a vengeful act after reading what the op had posted. I’m surprised you talk about respect to be honest, if you have gone through all 36 pages of this s thread you would have made a saner comment than instigate the lady to more violence against her family. And yes people view of life are different that’s why we have people who act more responsible than others.

Ehibiggirl:
sorry I called you a toad Oga. But I can imagine your own relationships with people when you strongly supported a vengeful act after reading what the op had posted. I’m surprised you talk about respect to be honest, if you have gone through all 36 pages of this s thread you would have made a saner comment than instigate the lady to more violence against her family. And yes people view of life are different that’s why we have people who act more responsible than others.

Now we are on same page...
I am not in support of her actions in any way but fair verdict needs to be served...

Something lead to something that lead to the stage of the OP family, while judging u don't just cut from up you cut at all angles...

I try to put my self in the shoes of all the parties involved to be able to know how I will react in each...

Our people say after blaming the person that killed the dead you also blame the dead for prompting what caused it's death...

I hope you learn one thing out of this argument...


Nigerians judge so much with emotions and not logically...
Next time her sister will mind her business...

N/B I have been following this thread from day one...

Ginaruby:


Now we are on same page...
I am not in support of her actions in any way but fair verdict needs to be served...

Something lead to something that lead to the stage of the OP family, while judging u don't just cut from up you cut at all angles...

I try to put my self in the shoes of all the parties involved to be able to know how I will react in each...

Our people say after blaming the person that killed the dead you also blame the dead for prompting what caused it's death...

I hope you learn one thing out of this argument...
[s]

Nigerians judge so much with emotions and not logically...
Next time her sister will mind her business...

N/B I have been following this thread from day one...

” you also blame the dead for prompting what caused it's death” I have nothing more to say to you after reading this. Maybe when you experience this story from the sisters position you will learn a thing or two about life.

Ginaruby:
Didn't you read that it was a continuous lash each time she sees the both of them... Who does that? That was way too much... When a man is pushed to the wall for so long the reaction is disastrous...

She got exactly what she wanted...
Make she taste that side of life too...

Abeg, if na play make you just stop am.

The girl got pregnant at 14, gave birth at 15 which truncated her education, and made nonsense of all their parent's efforts, and the money spent to send her to school.

Did she expect her family or her sister to pat her on the back, applaud her misdemeanor and give her an award, for it? Or was she expecting a chieftaincy title, for her waywardness?

Please, even if she was insulted on a daily basis, she brought it upon herself as she did NOT do anything in 5 years, to improve herself or better her lot.

I repeat: she was NOT justified in anyway, to beat up her sister, especially when that sister has helped to pay her bills, on more than one occasion.

If she did not want to be insulted, then she should NOT have gotten pregnant, in the first place!! Or she could have moved out of the house to live with the boyfriend who impregnated her, after marrying him!

Hmmmm.....this is so sad,one thing im happy for u realise it,it shows u acted based on your reasoning....you thought everything your sister did was out of hatred,no but love....what i will advice is please go and meet with her husband to be,beg him to keep everything you are going to tell him as secret for now.open up to him,plead with him to forgive your sister that she is innocent,also let him no u did all that thinking your sister hates u and guy.i pray he understand...after that he should also join u and your guy to plead with your sis.with this things might change.no harm in trying.please help a dieing sis and never do such evil....God knows how to reward those who hurts us badly,revenge is not ours and sisters,women,please lets try to stop this act of destroying ourselves ......hmmmm

CeterisXVII:

Abeg, if na play make you just stop am.

The girl got pregnant at 14, gave birth at 15 which truncated her education, and made nonsense of all their parent's efforts, and the money spent to send her to school.

Did she expect her family or her sister to pat her on the back, applaud her misdemeanor and give her an award, for it? Or was she expecting a chieftaincy title, for her waywardness?

Please, even if she was insulted on a daily basis, she brought it upon herself as she did NOT do anything in 5 years, to improve herself or better her lot.

I repeat: she was NOT justified in anyway, to beat up her sister, especially when that sister has helped to pay her bills, on more than one occasion.

If she did not want to be insulted, then she should NOT have gotten pregnant, in the first place!! Or she could have moved out of the house to live with the boyfriend who impregnated her, after marrying him!

hallelujah

Zainab20198:
Hmmmm.....this is so sad,one thing im happy for u realise it,it shows u acted based on your reasoning....you thought everything your sister did was out of hatred,no but love....what i will advice is please go and meet with her husband to be,beg him to keep everything you are going to tell him as secret for now.open up to him,plead with him to forgive your sister that she is innocent,also let him no u did all that thinking your sister hates u and guy.i pray he understand...after that he should also join u and your guy to plead with your sis.with this things might change.no harm in trying.please help a dieing sis and never do such evil....God knows how to reward those who hurts us badly,revenge is not ours and sisters,women,please lets try to stop this act of destroying ourselves ......hmmmm

This would have been the best(the fiancee coming along with Ify to talk to the sister), but he doesn't seem like he loved her sister that much, I wonder how he was able to easily let go like that... No trust whatsoever and you say you want to marry the lady? He probably had other options or thought it through & decided he doesn't want to be a part of that family and used the calls as an escape route... What has happened has happened, she has received enough backlash, it's remaining for her to receive enough sense...laslas I blame both she & her sister, imagine the gap in age yet it's looking like they are age mates, haba.

You have confessed the evils and abominations which you did to your blood sister, face the consequences and do not complain. In your previous comment, you told me that your sister should have gone to live with her fiance or rent an apartment. This is the time for you to do same, live with your baby daddy, remember you have no shame, such has been your lifestyle right from teen. I don't know what your parents are keeping your baby for, they should dump your baby with you since you are ungrateful that they are keeping your baby. Bear the consequences of your actions and stop complaining, you never valued your family or blood sister, so live like an outcast with your baby daddy, you said he is your crown/everything.

You said your guy doesn't know you confessed? Well, for now, is okay because he is the only one that can provide you shelter at the moment but, you have to let him know someday soon. He will eventually find out one day that you have confessed. Hiding the fact that you confessed from him will make him see you as a very secretive
person who can harm him. I want you to be prepared for the worst when he learns you have confessed (either from you or someone else).

SlimBrawnie:

This would have been the best(the fiancee coming along with Ify to talk to the sister), but he doesn't seem like he loved her sister that much, I wonder how he was able to easily let go like that... No trust whatsoever and you say you want to marry the lady? He probably had other options or thought it through & decided he doesn't want to be a part of that family and used the calls as an escape route... What has happened has happened, she has received enough backlash, it's remaining for her to receive enough sense...laslas I blame both she & her sister, imagine the gap in age yet it's looking like they are age mates, haba.

You at this Cruz UV not been threatened by cult group

bigpicture001:


You at this Cruz UV not been threatened by cult group

I left my first University because of that but I didn't just leave, investigations were made to get to the root of the matter, so you don't just come and draw conclusion about me solely based on what I'm writing here. I still maintain my stand that if he really trusted her, both of them would have put heads together to get to the root of the matter. Imagine someone calls to threaten my husband and he decides to leave the marriage, just calls o,no real threat. Threats don't work that way.

Thank you . I will tell him when the right time comes

unikmaureen:
You said your guy doesn't know you confessed? Well, for now, is okay because he is the only one that can provide you shelter at the moment but, you have to let him know someday soon. He will eventually find out one day that you have confessed. Hiding the fact that you confessed from him will make him see you as a very secretive
person who can harm him. I want you to be prepared for the worst when he learns you have confessed (either from you or someone else).

It seems you are afraid of this your guy, he may throw you out or stop loving you if he finds out that you are trying to make amends and peace with your sister, I know that’s your number one fear right now.Thats totally unhealthy for true genuine love expels fear.

Tell him and see how he reacts atleast you can confirm the love you believe he has for you and prove all naysayers wrong, most importantly so that this amendment mission with your family would be more genuine, easy and who knows your family may give you two their blessings while forgiving you.

Ok thank you

Ehibiggirl:
It seems you are afraid of this your guy, he may throw you out or stop loving you if he finds out that you are trying to make amends and peace with your sister, I know that’s your number one fear right now.Thats totally unhealthy for true genuine love expels fear.

Tell him and see how he reacts atleast you can confirm the love you believe he has for you and prove all naysayers wrong, most importantly so that this amendment mission with your family would be more genuine, easy and who knows your family may give you two their blessings while forgiving you.

@ifyjos I advise you go to your mum to beg for forgiveness because right now she's the only one that will still have a change of heart. She's ur mother and u're her daughter, go the house when u know she's the only one around and beg her, make sure u cry wella and let her see that u're remorseful, nothing touches a mum's heart more than to see her own child being genuinely sorry for whatever bad she may have caused.
So long as u can get ur mum to forgive you, ur other family members will later come around because she'll surely try to convince them to forgive you too.

Hello Ifyjos - if you have really confessed to your sis, blessings be upon you for doing the right things . Years later, you will thank yourself for taking this right step.

You have done a good thing and the fact that you have to hide it from ur BF tells a lot about his character n how he's influencing u to do stuff against ur conscience. You know the right thing, keep doing it. Oyibo ppl say: to urself be true, cos at the end u have urself to answer to. Reason why women that have aborted typically blame any instances of childlessness on the abortions, meanwhile some people may have no such issues but still have challenges.

N never stop bettering urself, there's so much ahead to stay fixated on doing better than ur sis. The sky is ur limit, so don't be afraid to start small.

Thank you so much for your advice , I really appreciate it, I had this in mind too I want to go and beg my mom with all my heart to forgive me and I was thinking to do it with the help of her pastor , I will go to her church on Sunday morning to plead with her pastor to go with me to beg my mom. I know that I have hurt her a lot and she supported me many times but for her to hate and abandon me this time I just pray she will be able to forgive me. Right now I know she is angry for her to block my number means she don’t want anything to do with me , plus my cousin that lives with us chatted me on WhatsApp telling me she heard my mom pleading with my brother from Lagos if she can come and leave my child there but my cousin say the way my mum was pleading a lot it seemed like he didn’t want to have my child with him I’m so happy he didn’t agree but I will act fast before anything happened to her. I told my cousin to keep informing me about the situation in the house in a secret way because I don’t want her to end up like me

Jayae:
@ifyjos I advise you go to your mum to beg for forgiveness because right now she's the only one that will still have a change of heart. She's ur mother and u're her daughter, go the house when u know she's the only one around and beg her, make sure u cry wella and let her see that u're remorseful, nothing touches a mum's heart more than to see her own child being genuinely sorry for whatever bad she may have caused.
So long as u can get ur mum to forgive you, ur other family members will later come around because she'll surely try to convince them to forgive you too.

Thank you so much . He is not a bad person but I just don’t know how to tell him about this but I promise when the right time come I will tell him

Gloriagee:
Hello Ifyjos - if you have really confessed to your sis, blessings be upon you for doing the right things . Years later, you will thank yourself for taking this
right step.

You have done a good thing and the fact that you have to hide it from ur BF tells a lot about his character n how he's influencing u to do stuff against ur conscience. You know the right thing, keep doing it. Oyibo ppl say: to urself be true, cos at the end u have urself to answer to. Reason why women that have aborted typically blame any instances of childlessness on the abortions, meanwhile some people may have no such issues but still have challenges.