Instead of torturing yourself over things you can't change, here are 3 questions to ask yourself that will let you know it's time for you to move on without regret into a new relationship:

1. Do you have to edit what you say when you talk to your partner?

If you're editing, it's a good possibility that you feel the need to live up to their expectations of you.

This absolutely stinks. And makes you increasingly feel unsafe and unloved and unworthy. People can talk all they want about being secure in yourself, but the fact is that a relationship is a union of two people who share their vulnerabilities.

If you can't do that without editing, you can move on without feeling any regret.

2. Have you given them every chance to stay together?

Let's say you broke up and you're open to getting back together if the core issue is addressed.

These are not core issues:

Money: Of course money is important. But it is not all-important. You can always make more money. You can never make more time.

Job: The job you have or don't have is not a core issue. Obviously. People change jobs all the time. You can too. If your partner doesn't like your job, distill down to the core issue to resolve it.

Education: Sometimes people's families will look down on you if you aren't from a certain university, or from any university. Again, if this is causes issues, distill down to the core issues to resolve it.

These are core issues:

Communication: Are you able to communicate openly and vulnerably with each other? If you aren't able to for whatever reason, it's time for your own pow-wow.

Solidarity (being on each other's team): If there is one defining characteristic of a couple that you want to be like, it's this. Do you have each other's back? When someone says something about your partner, are you there to defend them? If not, or if your partner doesn't, it's time to reconsider the relationship.

Trust: This one can be tricky because a lot of people have been hurt in relationships and can be inherently defensive. If you can't bring yourself to trust your partner, and you can't get their help (you'll need it; it's a relationship), then you can move on without regret and learn to make better choices in a partner next time.

If you're willing to work on these things, but your partner keeps focusing on the non-core issues, you can move on without regret

3. Were you delusional in the relationship?

Looking back on the relationship, if you were completely honest, could you admit that you were delusional?

In other words, were there moments or situations where you paused, wondered what was going on, but then filled in the gap with what you wanted to believe?

If you feel like parts of your relationship aren't real, or that you were ignoring issues to "make it work," don't do it anymore. Admit that it's time for you to move on.

Starting a new relationship is never easy. But tricking yourself into pining after someone who isn't right for you won't make you happy, either.

Ask yourself these questions if you suspect that your relationship isn't going anywhere so you can move on, without regrets, into a relationship that will truly let you both shine.

Wow nice post but for integrity sake... Your first point was wrong.


Editing what you say is part of growth.

Relationship is not license for freedom to say or do anyhow with one person.

A relationship should improve you before you marry... Yes. Forget what our youths are ranting about these days, it's just sexationship they are doing.

. Real love in a legit relationship cares about how the other person will feel if you speak or act, anything short is just abuse.

Ladylite:
Wow nice post but for integrity sake... Your first point was wrong.


Editing what you say is part of growth.

Relationship is not license for freedom to say or do anyhow with one person.

A relationship should improve you before you marry... Yes. Forget what our youths are ranting about these days, it's just sexationship they are doing.

. Real love in a legit relationship cares about how the other person will feel if you speak or act, anything short is just abuse.

Thanks dear for your contribution