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Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal - Romance - Nairaland

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Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by yazga: 12:03pm On Jan 30, 2020
In one of the posts I read recently on this thread https://www.nairaland.com/5655385/why-it-men-these-days, a lavylilly came up complaining on how men now consider the lady's profession and all before getting serious with the relationship. In her own words, love has been compromised. Her opinion is that love should come first before the person's attributes - physical appearance, profession, background etc. She sighted example of a cleaner in a bank who had difficulty finding "true" love as a cleaner until she put up a fake lifestyle that portrayed her as a bank staff. The man that married her thought she was a banker until after they wedded.

After reading her article, my thought is captured below

*****************************************************

I beg to take exceptions on your submission. As good as your words might sound to the ear, there's absolutely nothing wrong with someone having specifications of the attributes of whom they want to be with. Actually, everyone has the kind of people they are attracted to.

Often times we quote love as the most critical consideration for marriage. That may or may not be true depending on how you define love. Regardless, love must be based on something. When you see someone and love them, there's always a part of them that make you fall in love. It could be their kindness, intelligence, humility, carriage, industry, piety, motivation, confidence, goodwill; there's definitely that attribute you see and vooom you're falling in love. For instance, I have strong attraction when a girl is smart and diligent; that's me. Another might have soft spot for anybody who is a celebrity class, a nurse, a church sister etc. Same way, ladies have attributes they want in their man and they go all out looking for that man. That's what they mean when they say, "...man/woman of my dream". It means they already painted a picture of the man/woman in their imagination.

Now, faking your lifestyle to attract a partner that's not in your class is a futile and stupid venture. Eventually when every secret is laid bare, neither of the partners will be fulfilled in the union.

Even as a cleaner, there will definitely be men coming to her and loving her for whom she is. What you might be true is that such persons coming her way as a cleaner aren't the type she looks forward to meeting. That again proves my point that everybody has the kind of person they want. If your type isn't coming your way, the reasonable thing to do is to upgrade instead of faking it. Who says a cleaner can't become a regular bank worker. A cleaner can go back to school and obtain the requisite degree if that's all that matters.

For all that matters, there is always someone in your class who would want you. But don't be in class C and be complaining that men in class A ain't loving you for who you're. If you're a C class, open up to people in your level. If you insist on class A, then upgrade to that level.

My two cents though

3 Likes

Re: Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by Nobody: 12:08pm On Jan 30, 2020
One thing I have come to understand in this life is that we all have different and individual definitions of Love.....
Re: Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by lavylilly: 10:53pm On Jan 30, 2020
smiley
Re: Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by ImaIma1(f): 8:48pm On May 31, 2020
That's how my babe realized after getting married that her husband had made enquiries from.people about her salary, even down to all the allowances and bonuses she gets paid.

While she was looking at marrying someone she would grow with, he was busy investigating her income.

Now, so much regrets.
Re: Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by paix(m): 4:03pm On Jun 02, 2020
yazga:
In one of the posts I read recently on this thread https://www.nairaland.com/5655385/why-it-men-these-days, a lavylilly came up complaining on how men now consider the lady's profession and all before getting serious with the relationship. In her own words, love has been compromised. Her opinion is that love should come first before the person's attributes - physical appearance, profession, background etc. She sighted example of a cleaner in a bank who had difficulty finding "true" love as a cleaner until she put up a fake lifestyle that portrayed her as a bank staff. The man that married her thought she was a banker until after they wedded.

After reading her article, my thought is captured below

*****************************************************

I beg to take exceptions on your submission. As good as your words might sound to the ear, there's absolutely nothing wrong with someone having specifications of the attributes of whom they want to be with. Actually, everyone has the kind of people they are attracted to.

Often times we quote love as the most critical consideration for marriage. That may or may not be true depending on how you define love. Regardless, love must be based on something. When you see someone and love them, there's always a part of them that make you fall in love. It could be their kindness, intelligence, humility, carriage, industry, piety, motivation, confidence, goodwill; there's definitely that attribute you see and vooom you're falling in love. For instance, I have strong attraction when a girl is smart and diligent; that's me. Another might have soft spot for anybody who is a celebrity class, a nurse, a church sister etc. Same way, ladies have attributes they want in their man and they go all out looking for that man. That's what they mean when they say, "...man/woman of my dream". It means they already painted a picture of the man/woman in their imagination.

Now, faking your lifestyle to attract a partner that's not in your class is a futile and stupid venture. Eventually when every secret is laid bare, neither of the partners will be fulfilled in the union.

Even as a cleaner, there will definitely be men coming to her and loving her for whom she is. What you might be true is that such persons coming her way as a cleaner aren't the type she looks forward to meeting. That again proves my point that everybody has the kind of person they want. If your type isn't coming your way, the reasonable thing to do is to upgrade instead of faking it. Who says a cleaner can't become a regular bank worker. A cleaner can go back to school and obtain the requisite degree if that's all that matters.

For all that matters, there is always someone in your class who would want you. But don't be in class C and be complaining that men in class A ain't loving you for who you're. If you're a C class, open up to people in your level. If you insist on class A, then upgrade to that level.

My two cents though
That's why I pity girls that bleach their skin and wear wigs, trying to look artificial. Maybe they don't know that there are men who like dark girls with natural hair(long or short). As for me, I just don't like wigs and the foundation on their face. They irritate me.

3 Likes

Re: Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by franchuks(m): 6:55am On Jun 05, 2020
Very well said and nice line of thought.
Re: Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by Nobody: 1:54am On Jun 06, 2020
I wouldn't want someone saying they love me because of my profession or [insert other reason/s]. True love isn't attached to any reason/s; at least it shouldn't be.
Re: Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by MOnkeyBabe(f): 3:02am On Jun 06, 2020
yazga:
In one of the posts I read recently on this thread https://www.nairaland.com/5655385/why-it-men-these-days, a lavylilly came up complaining on how men now consider the lady's profession and all before getting serious with the relationship. In her own words, love has been compromised. Her opinion is that love should come first before the person's attributes - physical appearance, profession, background etc. She sighted example of a cleaner in a bank who had difficulty finding "true" love as a cleaner until she put up a fake lifestyle that portrayed her as a bank staff. The man that married her thought she was a banker until after they wedded.

After reading her article, my thought is captured below

*****************************************************

I beg to take exceptions on your submission. As good as your words might sound to the ear, there's absolutely nothing wrong with someone having specifications of the attributes of whom they want to be with. Actually, everyone has the kind of people they are attracted to.

Often times we quote love as the most critical consideration for marriage. That may or may not be true depending on how you define love. Regardless, love must be based on something. When you see someone and love them, there's always a part of them that make you fall in love. It could be their kindness, intelligence, humility, carriage, industry, piety, motivation, confidence, goodwill; there's definitely that attribute you see and vooom you're falling in love. For instance, I have strong attraction when a girl is smart and diligent; that's me. Another might have soft spot for anybody who is a celebrity class, a nurse, a church sister etc. Same way, ladies have attributes they want in their man and they go all out looking for that man. That's what they mean when they say, "...man/woman of my dream". It means they already painted a picture of the man/woman in their imagination.

Now, faking your lifestyle to attract a partner that's not in your class is a futile and stupid venture. Eventually when every secret is laid bare, neither of the partners will be fulfilled in the union.

Even as a cleaner, there will definitely be men coming to her and loving her for whom she is. What you might be true is that such persons coming her way as a cleaner aren't the type she looks forward to meeting. That again proves my point that everybody has the kind of person they want. If your type isn't coming your way, the reasonable thing to do is to upgrade instead of faking it. Who says a cleaner can't become a regular bank worker. A cleaner can go back to school and obtain the requisite degree if that's all that matters.

For all that matters, there is always someone in your class who would want you. But don't be in class C and be complaining that men in class A ain't loving you for who you're. If you're a C class, open up to people in your level. If you insist on class A, then upgrade to that level.

My two cents though
Oh, so it's by PROfeSsion, I thought it was by Cheap/lose vs. expensive/STRiCt Geh

2 Likes

Re: Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by yazga: 12:35pm On Jun 07, 2020
MOnkeyBabe:
Oh, so it's by PROfeSsion, I thought it was by Cheap/lose vs. expensive/STRiCt Geh
Re: Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by yazga: 7:00am On Jun 13, 2020
sad
MOnkeyBabe:
Oh, so it's by PROfeSsion, I thought it was by Cheap/lose vs. expensive/STRiCt Geh
Re: Re: Why Is It That Men Of These Days Are So Interested In Knowing Whether A Gal by lavylilly: 2:21pm On Jul 01, 2020
cheesy
paix:
That's why I pity girls that bleach their skin and wear wigs, trying to look artificial. Maybe they don't know that there are men who like dark girls with natural hair(long or short). As for me, I just don't like wigs and the foundation on their face. They irritate me.

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