Good evening guys.. First would love to say this my first time coming any platform to pour my heart and seek you all kind advices and opinions, please i might not get my English and sentence right!! But please pay attention to message. And be kind enough not to judge or insulting because non of can even survive a mile if you walk on my shoe. I plead you all read carefully with understanding

I’m a 27yrs young lady from ibibio. I am your typical pretty, eloquent, a bit of class, fair and 5ft a graduate and working with an non governmental parastatal here at Abuja. I met this guy who is in his mid 30, we both fell in love. He is from the east. work with a multinational company here in Abuja. He is not your average kind of man, he is above average well educated and speak proficiently well.

First time we both went out on a date @blueCuban here in Abuja it was heavenly words will fail me here as he treated as queen. I have never been this well treated with so much kindness and everything about him was just too perfect.. the very first sight when I walked out of office to meet him where he packed. I was blown away by his height, the way he smell god!!!! He smell goooood I must confess he was just everything I had dream of... dark, tall and you typical heterosexual man full with muscularity, he was just the one and I felt glad and lucky that I have met him and I will not let..

We both fell in love and decided to make it official. I got to meet his friends, family and just anyone close to him. Fast forward months into our relationship. While cleaning up the house I found a RVS drugs inside the walk in closet hidden carefully in the bedroom... I got so afraid even knowing we practice safe sex always and never for once have we get carried away. My whole world came down on me!!! Not a word has he was out with friend I ran to the nearest private hospital requested for a full test and it all came out negative, waited for 3 month did another and still negative. I never mentioned this until the last time did the last test. I confronted him and he open up that he is HIV positive.... I cried that night could not sleep.. here is one person who had genuinely make me happy, someone who I am deeply in love. I cried and cried he kept begging me and telling me he will never put me on harm-way those were his words. A weeks later he gifted me a brand new SUV car but felt he was trying to buy and I told him that I love beyond him being hiv positive and that I would want to spend my life with him..

It was not all perfect as I will not paint a false image here, in 2 occasions he has open up to me on him cheating while he was out of the country on official trip. Truth is I am not the kind of girl who will blow things out of proportion because a man decide to be foolish. I will never bronze a man ego but shaming him when things like this comes up. Also I had my own issues. I’m very dramatic I became very protective of him and started monitoring him which had complain off over and over that my attitude is making him fall out of love with me

He was very faithful to his drugs and on one of the visit to the hospital it was shown that the viral load has been suppressed and it became un-dictated.. we both were happy and a little relieved.

Last Christmas we had a serious fight over something that I believe should not had escalated to him smashing his iPhone 11 and getting all aggressive with me. When it got all serious I left the house and went straight to my own house because I needed him to clam down. But oga got a new phone the following day and block me on all social media platforms and even calling him I was blocked from reaching him as I tried too. I quickly reach out to his closest friend who help talk to him and ask him to clam down so we could talk things out.. he eventually did and we talk and things seem a little normal but not like it normally used to be.. I have apologized over and over and he said it was fine and that he has forgiven me, yet things were not normal it got to point that I questioned his love for me and oga said he doesn’t love me anymore down on this are the message he sent me.. I have beg him over and over telling him how much he means to me telling him I will less my drama but oga is not bending

Here I’m confused, tour apart, I have used everyone he knows both family and friends and they telling me to give him space for now and that “what will be will be” truth non of them know all the sacrifices I have made non of them know how well I have gave my life and even put it at risk for him... I do not want to mention this to any of them because I don’t want to betray him even at these point he is hurting me

I love him and really wants him back please guys I need an honest advice on what to do?? I need my man back.

If he doesn't want you anymore, it's simple and fine. Move on. You need to realise the fact that everyone has a replacement. Replace him.

This man genuinely wants out.

Save your last shred of dignity and stop begging. That ship’s sailed. Let him go.

Reflect on all the things you did wrong in the relationship, make a decision to do better in the next, and then move on.

By the way, are you not sure you revealed a bit too much in this post? Your state of origin, where you both live and work, etc. You may have told the world his HIV status. Should anyone who knows either of you stumble on this post, they’ll put the pieces together very quickly.

First of all I want to know the sacrifices you've made for him.... God I hate this line of speech.

I don't see no love here, I see you not wanting to let him go because he's rich, handsome, tall and dark.
He cheats, you're OK with it, he does this: you're OK with it, he does that: you're OK with it. He keeps his Health status away from you: you're OK with it because he's made, he's tall, dark and handsome.

Dude is, was and will still be a jackass, but you don't wanna let him go because of status and physique.

Guys double your hustle: where money talks, bulshitz bow and Love take a backseat.

I still wanna know the sacrifices you've made, do you invest any money on him? do you help him with any contract? do you help him with his job?

His time with you is over and he wanna explore more, so don't try to tie him.

OR just because you....
let me stop before I say something that might got me 100 mentions

Some people no just get self-worth at-all

When the Going Gets tough, the tough gets going.

Hmmnn..

I know it really hard but there is a saying that..

if love fails set yourself free, let your heart spread it's wings and fly again..

If he's yours you don't have to fight for it.. it will come back.

Hustle oo!

So that women go dey rush you even if you get HIV or Coronavirus.

Road closed..... A man that can break items, can break heads.....

Another water under the bridge..... His ship has sailed, leaving you at the port.......

He would move unto the next one, if she is not inquisitive enough to find out about his status, he keeps her for slightly longer......

He already got another lady lined up.......

It is well... everything looks perfect till you get so close to him* I think we shd stop checking out for perfections everywhr* no life is perfect... you must have ignored the signs and signals at the start...


God help you*

It hurts I know.he is done with u my dear move on with ur life b4 u get carried away ND get infected ND come here again asking for solution.pls move out now u will b fine

This post is lengthy, but I managed to read it completely.

I'm no relationship expert, but one thing I know is you should learn to respect yourself and save whatever dignity is left of you when someone says they don't want you. This man here has made up his mind. Even if he later accepts you after all the series of begging, the love will never be the same, trust me.

Love yourself and pick yourself up, girl. Don't let anyman use you 'wash.' He's the one with a shortcoming not many people would want to live with; despite that, you loved him, and he doesn't see how precious it is to be loved with one's HIV.

BottomLine is, I'm begging you to stop begging. Move on and learn from your own mistakes too.

Offpoint:
First of all I want to know the sacrifices you've made for him.... God I hate this line of speech.

I don't see no love here, I see you not wanting to let him go because he's rich, handsome, tall and dark.
He cheats, you're OK with it, he does this: you're OK with it, he does that: you're OK with it. He keeps his Health status away from you: you're OK with it because he's made, he's tall, dark and handsome.

Dude is, was and will still be a jackass, but you don't wanna let him go because of status and physique.

Guys double your hustle: where money talks, bulshitz bow and Love take a backseat.

I still wanna know the sacrifices you've made, do you invest any money on him? do you help him with any contract? do you help him with his job?

His time with you is over and he wanna explore more, so don't try to tie him.

OR just because you....
let me stop before I say something that might got 100 mentions

Really!!!! Mrs I a very hard working lady. I fell in love with him before all this came up.. I earn just a single 0 different from his salary of 6 digit.. so what are you saying it sad you see this just these way

Mustiboy:
This post is lengthy, but I managed to read it completely.

I'm no relationship expert, but one thing I know is you should learn to respect yourself and save whatever dignity is left of you when someone says they don't want you. This man here has made up his mind. Even if he later accepts you after all the series of begging, the love will never be the same, trust me.

Love yourself and pick yourself up, girl. Don't let anyman use you 'wash.' He's the one with a shortcoming not many people would want to live with; despite that, you loved him, and he doesn't see how precious it is to be loved with one's HIV.

BottomLine is, I'm begging you to stop begging. Move on and learn from your own mistakes too.

Thanks I deeply appreciate this

Casalinda:




Really!!!! Mrs I a very hard working lady. I fell in love with him before all this came up.. I earn just a single 0 from his 6 digit.. it sad you see this just these way

Sorry I have to tell you the hard truth, maybe if you tell me the "sacrifices" you've made, I'll change my view of the situation.

I'm not interested in what you were earning OR earning.
Same way men can never be satisfy with sex, is the way women can never be satisfy with money

Offpoint:

Sorry I have to tell you the hard truth, maybe if you tell me the "sacrifices" you've made, I'll change my view of the situation.

Have you ever falling in love regardless of the issues on ground?? I might have had my own issues but I did bring something as well to the table

I hate op.

Very interesting read I must say. First of all, lady, you need to have more regard for yourself! I mean, how much baggage do u plan to carry for the so called relationship? Ask urself, is this why u were born? To carry load wey pass you!
His health status is already a BIG deal, plus CHEATING, and then ANGER ISSUES... GIRL! Someone needs to slap you back to reality.

You didn't mention what exactly you did that is creating all this EARTHQUAKE... his health status or cheating ways didn't create any storm o. You downed it like a bottle of malt. But u are here, blaming yourself, for what exactly? Did you kill someone?

Return the car, return the expensive gifts and return to your right senses. Girl you need to go to church and give God praise cos u almost killed yourself over what really? I am honestly shocked at u.

Offpoint:
First of all I want to know the sacrifices you've made for him.... God I hate this line of speech.

I don't see no love here, I see you not wanting to let him go because he's rich, handsome, tall and dark.
He cheats, you're OK with it, he does this: you're OK with it, he does that: you're OK with it. He keeps his Health status away from you: you're OK with it because he's made, he's tall, dark and handsome.

Dude is, was and will still be a jackass, but you don't wanna let him go because of status and physique.

Guys double your hustle: where money talks, bulshitz bow and Love take a backseat.

I still wanna know the sacrifices you've made, do you invest any money on him? do you help him with any contract? do you help him with his job?

His time with you is over and he wanna explore more, so don't try to tie him.

OR just because you....
let me stop before I say something that might got 100 mentions

Very well said.

Babe has no iota of self esteem.

Casalinda:




Have you ever falling in love regardless of the issues on ground?? I might have had my own issues but I did bring something as well to the table

Sorry, I don't wanna drag this any further.
let me leave Space for others to contribute to your predicament.

I like your story. You tried.

And I see you are a selfless person! You deserve more than this sis. Plssss wake UP

yvelchstores:
Very interesting read I must say. First of all, lady, you need to have more regard for yourself! I mean, how much baggage do u plan to carry for the so called relationship? Ask urself, is this why u were born? To carry load wey pass you!
His health status is already a BIG deal, plus CHEATING, and then ANGER ISSUES... GIRL! Someone needs to slap you back to reality.

You didn't mention what exactly you did that is creating all this EARTHQUAKE... his health status or cheating ways didn't create any storm o. You downed it like a bottle of malt. But u are here, blaming yourself, for what exactly? Did you kill someone?

Return the car, return the expensive gifts and return to your right senses. Girl you need to go to church and give God praise cos u almost killed yourself over what really? I am honestly shocked at u.

Honestly, I read some things and feel pity for their parents.

Shhhhhhh, before you say kpichikum, download Tina Turner's music called, "What's love got to do with it" and perhaps, watch the movie too. If after listening to the music and watching the movie, you are still suffering from love nwantiti or poppy love, go for cleansing because you got issues more than medicine and counseling can heal. A guy deliberately hides lethal sickness from you, cheats multiple times (am sorry for those ladies maybe men because they may be ignorant of dick weaponization) and tells you that he can't pretend anymore to love you and you still want him back. You obviously have very low self esteem or no self esteem at all. Didn't your parents raise you right? Is it his physique or money that is tumbling you down, left and right? What is it; because am not understanding you. Have you imagined if the condoms broke or you kissed a bleeding lip and what would have happened. To be blunt, are you mad? So the SUV is worth more than your life and the love ones that would be heart broken if they find out that you are hiv positive. What is wrong with your head? So, no sense of worth at all? Beko explain; you should be celebrating. Why do we ask God for blessings and refuse to embrace them when He sends them. Are you normal at all nne. Although you deliberately withheld the nature of what broke the camel's back, regardless, why are you crying. The best cure for cancer is to clip off the carcinogenic elements instead of wanting to embrace them. Give your head a shake and thank God for his abundant hidden blessings for you and run. Even if he buys you a chopper, run and don't look in the rearview mirror. Avoid his brake lights baby girl. Trust me, you will be glad it was over when you reflect on your stupidity some time down the road. Chai, poverty is a disease.

Sounds like a movie script. It's the typical trope of a tragic love story.

This is alot babe.
No long story, it's going to hurt but you've got to move on. What if the relationship wasn't God's plan for you? Whatever you feel for him will surely fade away with time, like someone said above.. save your dignity.
He could pretend to love you and continue the relationship but that wouldn't help either. I had to let go of someone because we weren't working as a 'couple' , gosh I cried my eyes out for 2 weeks straight but now I'm fine and I understand better and guess what we are still casual friends. You need to commit your relationship into God's hand and let his will be done.

Cas1741:
Shhhhhhh, before you say kpichikum, download Tina Turner's music called, "What's love got to do with it" and perhaps, watch the movie too. If after listening to the music and watching the movie, you are still suffering from love nwantiti or poppy love, go for cleansing because you got issues more than medicine and counseling can heal. A guy deliberately hides lethal sickness from you, cheats multiple times (am sorry for those ladies maybe men because they may be ignorant of dick weaponization) and tells you that he can't pretend anymore to love you and you still want him back. You obviously have very low self esteem or no self esteem at all. Didn't your parents raise you right? Is it his physique or money that is tumbling you down, left and right? What is it; because am not understanding you. Have you imagined if the condoms broke or you kissed a bleeding lip and what would have happened. To be blunt, are you mad? So the SUV is worth more than your life and the love ones that would be heart broken if they find out that you are hiv positive. What is wrong with your head? So, no sense of worth at all? Beko explain; you should be celebrating. Why do we ask God for blessings and refuse to embrace them when He sends them. Are you normal at all nne. Although you deliberately withheld the nature of what broke the camel's back, regardless, why are you crying. The best cure for cancer is to clip off the carcinogenic elements instead of wanting to embrace them. Give your head a shake and thank God for his abundant hidden blessings for you and run. Even if he buys you a chopper, run and don't look in the rearview mirror. Avoid his brake lights baby girl. Trust me, you will be glad it was over when you reflect on your stupidity some time down the road. Chai, poverty is a disease.

Let me correct something here. I’m not poor, i was in love with him before most of this things came up. You all saying pity. But I am not asking for any at all I earn 5 digits and I’m comfortable well. In respective of you honestly but please take away that poverty part because I am not poor. I fell in love I was genuinely happy not because of any kobo he spend but because I love him

Thank God for ur life he didnt gave u im mumu HIV......Abeg forget am..contact make i show u love but me no too get money like am ooooooo but am a hutzler...09060507343 whatsapp

If this guy was earning 40k or 50k salary would you be killing your self like this?!
Guys we need to double our hustle o, na money be fine bobo
Only money and resources can make a woman love you crazily like this!

Another figment of the writers imagination. This whole crap you people keep writing is getting annoying. It's now obvious that nairaland has employed half baked writers to help drive traffic.

This is so annoying. first and foremost you don't come here to tell the members of a public forum that a guy fighting so hard to keep his CD4+ count to optimum is not our average kinda guy when as a matter of fact you dont even know anyone here. This alone sets me on a pedestal to really figure out what's going on with you.

You don't love that guy pls let him go. You were plainly after his physique, his money, his smell, the fact that he can smash an iphone 11 and buy same the next day and the fact that he works with a multi national and earns some hundreds of thousands. You don't even care if he loves u genuinely or just acting out a script. You only want him to accept ur apologies and then pretend all is fine so you both can continue to stick around and this brings me to questioning your self esteem and self worth. I guess I'm even taking it to unprecedented levels by asking about the self esteem of a regular nigerian girl.


He is done. Move on

this one deep ... let him go and start a new chapter of life to avoid .... attachment and expectations of the uncertain future .makes us to forget this present (gift) moment God has given us. in reality emotions /sentiment leads to tears. our existence na just joke

Am trying to go to the mechanic and tell him about the story and see y all of them are not coming because we really need to address the issue by noon immigration are not at the border sef