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So yesterday was my birthday and my hubby completely ignored it as usual. Like he always does every year. I don't know why he does this, I told him before that I would like some kind of acknowledgement on my birthdays even if he doesn't take me out or buy expensive gifts he should at least maybe say a prayer for me but he still continues to act like he does not know it's my birthday, since the second year of our marriage he had been doing this.

It's very hurtful because he knows I like to be remembered on my birthday but he just ignores it. We don't go out anywhere, we don't do anything else to bond as a couple because he looks down on things like that, no random gifts, doesnt give me money unless I beg, no acknowledging anniversaries unless I bring it up. So I wanted just that one day to be the day he remembers me or does something special but he ignored it again.

I am trying to overlook his deliberate inconsiderate act because I reminded him two days ago about it and have been telling him for a while.


I know I might sound like I am taking little things serious but I am very hurt he isn't taking me serious about something that means a lot to me........Keeps doing the same thing every year. Is this not wickedness?


Abeg no insult me, am a sensitive person.

Ok

What do you do, and what does he do on his Birthday ?

Missis:
Mods please no front page for privacy reasons, thanks

So yesterday was my birthday and my hubby completely ignored it as usual. Like he always does every year. I don't know why he does this, I told him before that I would like some kind of acknowledgement on my birthdays even if he doesn't take me out or buy expensive gifts he should at least maybe say a prayer for me but he still continues to act like he does not know it's my birthday, since the second year of our marriage he had been doing this.

It's very hurtful because he knows I like to be remembered on my birthday but he just ignores it. We don't go out anywhere, we don't do anything else to bond as a couple because he looks down on things like that, no random gifts, doesnt give me money unless I beg, no acknowledging anniversaries unless I bring it up. So I wanted just that one day to be the day he remembers me or does something special but he ignored it again.

I am trying to overlook his deliberate inconsiderate act because I reminded him two days ago about it and have been telling him for a while.


I know I might sound like I am taking little things serious but I am very hurt he isn't taking me serious about something that means a lot to me........Keeps doing the same thing every year. Is this not wickedness?


Abeg no insult me, am a sensitive person.

Has he always been like this? Before marriage I mean

It seems you are jobless since you still have to beg him for money, the problem is not entirely about him not acknowledging your birthday but the fact that your mind and life is empty with no amazing things going on.

So pick somethng and pursue it.

My dear you better leave yr life and enjoy yr marriage. Befor you die young

Birthdays are for kids. A matured being doesn't need to celebrate birthday. The true date you were born can never come back again.

Once you have crossed 18 years, forget birthdays.

Before some religious people quote me, Jesus' birthday is celebrated, but the actual practice is remembrance date.

It would be good to say birth-date.

Leave the innocent man alone. There are many expenses to take care of of which birthday is less important.




Just forgive him and move on.

It's unfortunate that your husband isn't taking these things seriously even after you told him severally.

Like someone asked, I would also like to know what happens on his own birthdays.

My advice to you is to not allow it bother you. He knows it hurts you and still does it, You are giving him too much power. Next time, don't remind him and don't act like it's hurtful. Take yourself out. If you have kids, take them with you and enjoy yourself at every opportunity you can get.

Also, Try and make your own money so you won't have to be begging him anymore.

This your husband that you're always complaining about, time never reach for you to divorce am?

Begging him for money You don't have hand to work ni. He has always been like that before marriage but to escape poverty u marry am. Divorce him na

Another handicapped lazy unproductive woman. Amidst all the responsibilities confronting local man in this present harsh economic realities he comes home to meet a log of wood begging for money and disturbing for birthday. May God prolong your husband's life.

Everybody can't be like you, your husband don't value birthdays doesn't mean he don't love you. I for one don't mark birthdays too, it only reminds me that I am getting closer to my grave and I haven't achieved a quarter of what I want.

Meanwhile if you are in Awka, come check out my new serviced apartments, it is a home away from home

Missis:
Mods please no front page for privacy reasons, thanks

So yesterday was my birthday and my hubby completely ignored it as usual. Like he always does every year. I don't know why he does this, I told him before that I would like some kind of acknowledgement on my birthdays even if he doesn't take me out or buy expensive gifts he should at least maybe say a prayer for me but he still continues to act like he does not know it's my birthday, since the second year of our marriage he had been doing this.

It's very hurtful because he knows I like to be remembered on my birthday but he just ignores it. We don't go out anywhere, we don't do anything else to bond as a couple because he looks down on things like that, no random gifts, doesnt give me money unless I beg, no acknowledging anniversaries unless I bring it up. So I wanted just that one day to be the day he remembers me or does something special but he ignored it again.

I am trying to overlook his deliberate inconsiderate act because I reminded him two days ago about it and have been telling him for a while.


I know I might sound like I am taking little things serious but I am very hurt he isn't taking me serious about something that means a lot to me........Keeps doing the same thing every year. Is this not wickedness?


Abeg no insult me, am a sensitive person.

So y expecting a different result when he keeps repeating it every year and hurting yourself in the process? Ur happiness is in your hands ooo... Buy cake and ice cream, take yourself out, buy yourself something expensive biko... You'll survive without his birthday wishes. You stronger than u know. Your next birthday don't even say pim about it, simply celebrate with ur kids.

For those asking if I have a job,
I had a job until late last year, I was pregnant and too sick to continue working so I quit.
Ordinarily I don't like being at home all day or asking for money, it's not my nature. This is the first time I an jobless since I got married and I honestly am not happy about it. So many things I wished to buy this period that I can't get because I don't have money.

Then those who asked if he used to celebrate birthdays before marriage, he used to.
We both used to celebrate each others birthdays and buy gifts then when we got married he started acting like he can no longer remember. We dated for two years. I am not asking for big gifts or anything extravagant, just for him to maybe appreciate me and pray for me or say a few nice words to me.

crackkhaus:
This your husband that you're always complaining about, time never reach for you to divorce am?

No I don't want divorce

SweetCunt97:
So y expecting a different result when he keeps repeating it every year and hurting yourself in the process? Ur happiness is in your hands ooo... Buy cake and ice cream, take yourself out, buy yourself something expensive biko... You'll survive without his birthday wishes. You stronger than u know. Your next birthday don't even say pim about it, simply celebrate with ur kids.

If I buy things to eat and celebrate by myself he will not be happy that I didn't buy his share. I did it for my babys birthday when he acted like he doesn't care as usual even after i reminded him

but when I bought cookies and cake and soft drinks for only myself and the kids he was upset and started asking where is his own share.

Kekereekun123:
Begging him for money You don't have hand to work ni. He has always been like that before marriage but to escape poverty u marry am. Divorce him na

I can't work presently because of health

Missis:


No I don't want divorce

There's nothing you can do since you said you tried
Some people are not what we want them to be even when we try to, you can't mandate people to change, give them reasons to and not by imposing.

Take him for him as he has taken you for you

Enjoy your marriage as everyone has its own jangolover

worworbabe:
It's unfortunate that your husband isn't taking these things seriously even after you told him severally.

Like someone asked, I would also like to know what happens on his own birthdays.

My advice to you is to not allow it bother you. He knows it hurts you and still does it, You are giving him too much power. Next time, don't remind him and don't act like it's hurtful. Take youraelf out. If you have kids, take them with you and enjoy youraelf at every opportunity you can get.

Also, Try and make your own money so you won't have to be begging him anymore.

Thank you for the advice. It was helpful.

Dyt:


There's nothing you can do since you said you tried
Some people are not what we want them to be even when we try to, you can't mandate people to change, give them reasons to and not by imposing.

Take him for him as he has taken you for you

Enjoy your marriage as everyone has its own jangolover

It's like I just have to accept it but it's very very hurtful I won't lie.
I don't even demand in a normal day, I am not a demanding wife, I ask for so little but this is one thing I told him means a lot to me but he isn't taking it serious.

Missis:


It's like I just have to accept it but it's very very hurtful I won't lie.
I don't even demand in a normal day, I am not a demanding wife, I ask for so little but this is one thing I told him means a lot to me but he isn't taking it serious.

Well
Some of us are insensitive to our SO needs.
Don't nag him about it again, surprise him often and do the things you would want him to do to You, someday, maybe someday, he will reciprocate

Missis:


I can't work presently because of health

well focus on your health . Birthday wishing wont add money to ur account. When ur ok. Either divorce or endure. U chose to marry him

Missis:


If I buy things to eat and celebrate by myself he will not be happy that I didn't buy his share. I did it for my babys birthday when he acted like he doesn't care as usual even after i reminded him

but when I bought cookies and cake and soft drinks for only myself and the kids he was upset and started asking where is his own share.

You pretend not to understand him na. He's playing smart... Quite d stingy selfish husband you have.

Don't destroy your home or add more problems to your health over a trivial issue such as birthday. Something's are better overlooked. Its your duty to create your own happiness.

No love, he doesn't love and appreciate you enough

Missis:
For those asking if I have a job,
I had a job until late last year, I was pregnant and too sick to continue working so I quit.
Ordinarily I don't like being at home all day or asking for money, it's not my nature. This is the first time I an jobless since I got married and I honestly am not happy about it. So many things I wished to buy this period that I can't get because I don't have money.

Then those who asked if he used to celebrate birthdays before marriage, he used to.
We both used to celebrate each others birthdays and buy gifts then when we got married he started acting like he can no longer remember. We dated for two years. I am not asking for big gifts or anything extravagant, just for him to maybe appreciate me and pray for me or s
ay a few nice words to me.

Ask him why he no longer appreciates you, that's the real problem here

Somzee:
Don't destroy your home or add more problems to your health over a trivial issue such as birthday. Something's are better overlooked. Its your duty to create your own happiness.

this is the problem with many people. They want others to be responsible for their happiness. She married a rigid man yet is expecting petting and love .

Hmmmm...you reminded him days leading to it yet he ignored as usual. What to do? Make your own happiness deliberately biko.

Get yourself a nice dress/gift/whatever for your birthday, get your kids/friends and others to cerebrate you by celebrating yourself. Do something that makes you happy on those days ma'am. If he doesn't still wish you well for the day, take it with a pinch of salt and wait for his own birthday or special days to come and totally ignore too. No vehemence, no animosity, just live according to that particular code while every other thing remains fine.

Happy birthday in arrears maami...we all remain responsible for our own happiness

Missis:
For those asking if I have a job,
I had a job until late last year, I was pregnant and too sick to continue working so I quit.
Ordinarily I don't like being at home all day or asking for money, it's not my nature. This is the first time I an jobless since I got married and I honestly am not happy about it. So many things I wished to buy this period that I can't get because I don't have money.[b][/b]

Then those who asked if he used to celebrate birthdays before marriage, he used to.
We both used to celebrate each others birthdays and buy gifts then when we got married he started acting like he can no longer remember. We dated for two years. I am not asking for big gifts or anything extravagant, just for him to maybe appreciate me and pray for me or say a few nice words to me.

You are not asking for too much. Just try and make yourself happy by all means.

Also try working from home.

Hers is even good....
Me and my husband doesn't even remember our birthdays,our anniversary's
Infact we stopped wishing each other happy birthday years ago....and we're cool with it.
It's not a do or die thing!

Maybe your husband don dey follow Jehovah's witnesses.

Missis:

No I don't want divorce

Then you may just have to learn to live with it for the sake of your own peace of mind.

And better still, you can organise a little family dinner/lunch during important dates and involve him in the celebration.