yazga:
Life no balance

Sincerely I learned somethings here which I definitely know will help in future... The best thing d man sud av been doing is to make sure he is sending money to the boy at intervals nd documenting it cos even if the family wants to intervene d first question they will ask is if he has been taking care of child nd court will definitely want evidence.... I think this man wants his marriage back from my own observation....

Tell him to take his son by force, there are some set of women you don't negotiate with, no woman can take my child in Africa

Claim the boy because the court still recognise the man and the woman as husband and wife, the woman can only claim full custody if the court has granted her, imagine a man asking this type of question in Africa were men are in charge

Does the friend not know the account number of the wife? He can get it if he really wants to be financially responsible for his child..

Don't be quick to assume that the friend is not at fault in the whole scenario...

How did he and up with a woman who assaults him physically and threatens to kill her own son? He is culpable but playing victim.

A truly responsible and considerate man does not go through this problem. Even if the in-laws are mad and if the wife is mad would they would not prevent a responsible and respectable man from seeing his son.

TainyLite:
Sincerely I learned somethings here which I definitely know will help in future... The best thing d man sud av been doing is to make sure he is sending money to the boy at intervals nd documenting it cos even if the family wants to intervene d first question they will ask is if he has been taking care of child nd court will definitely want evidence.... I think this man wants his marriage back from my own observation....

Yes he does want his marriage back.

samguru:
My friend on a several occasions has asked his wife to open account for his son and also furnish him with details of his son's school so that he can start paying his child school fees.
The adamant wife refused to do so and even took the boy far away from him .

I have advised him to start a new life and that the boy will come back to look for him in the future, but my friend is yet to heed to my advice[/b]

Your friend should move on with his life since his ex wants to torture and punish him by using his son as a weapon. T he more your friend tries to reach out to his son, the more hardened his wife's heart will get and she WILL keep denying him access to his son . Its a game a LOT of women play to perfection and your friend will not be the first man to be in these shoes and he will not be the last.

Instead of your friend stressing himself unnecessarily and allowing his ex to wipe the floor with him, he should just zero his mind that his ex is evil and he should focus ALL his energies on building himself financially and emotionally and if necessary get a new woman (if he can still stand living with a woman) .

If ( God forbid ) your friend dies today, his son will still survive.

Once a woman becomes evil and turns your kids against you, there is no need fighting her for the kids as its not every good father that reaps the benefits of fatherhood and actually some fathers who did not give a toss about their kids are the ones who end up reaping the benefits of fatherhood. Its just the way life is.

samguru:
This lady is very violent, he threatened to kill that boy when my friend visited the boy at her mother's house.

Since she has threatened to kill the boy , then your friend has a case in court as threats to kill are a criminal offence that can even help to get your friend sole custody of the boy. Your friend should seek GOOD legal advice from a FAMILY LAW SPECIALIST (if he doesn't mind dragging his son through the courts which can be quite destabilising for the boy).

Left to me, he should just ignore her for now and focus on himself only for now as his childish and petty ex wants to mess with his mind BIG TIME by using the boy as a weapon to get at him.

samguru:
Thank you all for your contributions,I just reached out to the lady via phone,she insulted me and my generations unborn.

After the whole bruhaha, she said ,if my friend wants to see the boy,he should send #1million to her account and she will make arrangement on where to meet.

I thought she was joking,I told my friend to send her #100k at least to persuade her and all the expenses she has incurred in raising that boy, immediately she sent the #100k back to my friend and said if the #1m is less by a kobo,he should just forget he has a son somewhere.
What kind of woman is this?

This conversation, I hope it was recorded.
Keep provoking her, go to the son's school, visit him there, pay his school fees directly to the school, if he has funds, let him pay for a whole year upfront, she would most likely change his school, just keep provoking her and keep documenting it.
Let him keep sending money to her every month of course she would send back. He should try everything possible to make peace with her and her family. We already know she's going to refuse and probably threaten to kill the child again.
Within a year I believe if she's as bad as you claim you should have enough evidence to sway in court.
He has been away from the boy since 2016 one more year would not kill him. But from experience she can't keep child away from his father, the boy is going to grow up and ask for his dad but don't wait for that, get your son as soon as possible.