donmarshia:


Neither Aisha nor Ngozi should be your standard. I am also not against you working or helping your husband. All forms of work are hounarable!

But then, your assumption that help must be financial is really flawed. How can you quantify raising valuable children, how much is it worth? What is greater than this?

I am against sterotypical views as mentioned by the teacher. From her statements, if a wife cannot contribute financially, she is a failure. Jeez! What has happened to our world?

If before you get married, you are already thinking that your husband will need your help financially, then your thoughts might come to pass, creating a future where your husband will always lack. Be careful what you think.

Exactly! For many men, the only help you can give is peace and the warm reassuring smile you give him when he comes home. That assurance that all is well at home and with the kids when they're away.

Nuttella:
But we are talking about a full time housewife, not the one that have a business.

if u were a man and u started dating a girl while both of you were in school then after school you happened to get a job while d girl haven't been able.
So you won't marry her or she is a liability now' Leave her n look 4 a working class or business owner I guess?

Nuttella:
My dear, a child that will turn out bad will do so even if you are a 24/7 housewife, moreover children tends to get tired of their parents always being there, that is why children dont have respect for their housewife mothers.

Housewifes are not doing the best for the society, that married nurse putting her life on the line during covid19 is the one making the world a better place, that married soldier fighting war is making the world a better place.

So with this your thought process. Why bother getting married then. since upbringing has no effect on children.

Are you that old or ugly that you really think the ultimate value a woman has is in the corporate world?

Children don't respect their mothers that are housewives?

You're messed up, honestly

saaphiere:
I am seeing someone getting pained because women are about being emancipated from men cage.
Cry me a river

which cage women when be cage on their own

Nuttella:
What is the proper planning that can be put in place cause the last time I checked, money diminishes if it is not replaced.

The loss of a partner is not what anyone expects or prepares for ideally. If you're even going into marriage with this kind of mindset, preparing for the ultimate worst from the onset, then nothing I say will make sense to you.

Even if both partners are working. It would surely take its toll except the man was nothing to write home about. But if there was love and transparency in the marriage. The woman would have access to all finances so in the midst of the grief, she's not entirely lost, she has something to start a business to keep the family afloat, and even at that. will you tell me you've not seen families where the man still provides from the grave via investments?

There are men who pride themselves in taking care of their families. They love doing it, they lead their homes, not control despite being the breadwinner and they appreciate the intrinsic values a woman bring into their life.

I know you can't relate but get out of your toxic circle. They do exist.

chiefoboh1:
if u were a man and u started dating a girl while both of you were in school then after school you happened to get a job while d girl haven't been able.
So you won't marry her or she is a liability now' Leave her n look 4 a working class or business owner I guess?

I will marry her, when she finish school, I get her a job or a business, no room for housewife.

efosky1246:


The loss of a partner is not what anyone expects or prepares for ideally. If you're even going into marriage with this kind of mindset, preparing for the ultimate worst from the onset, then nothing I say will make sense to you.

Even if both partners are working. It would surely take its toll except the man was nothing to write home about. But if there was love and transparency in the marriage. The woman would have access to all finances so in the midst of the grief, she's not entirely lost, she has something to start a business to keep the family afloat, and even at that. will you tell me you've not seen families where the man still provides from the grave via investments?

There are men who pride themselves in taking care of their families. They love doing it, they lead their homes, not control despite being the breadwinner and they appreciate the intrinsic values a woman bring into their life.

I know you can't relate but get out of your toxic circle. They do exist.

So what you are saying is that men that have working wives dont take pride in taking care of their family. Any man that won't let his wife work is a control freak and he is doing so for selfish reasons and nothing else.

Say NO to housewife.

prophetfire:
I wonder. What happened to the freedom to choose as it suits one which they advocate?

Help me ask them oo

Hathor5:




You can be pro-choice and still have an opinion on which choice is better right?

Freedom of choice and freedom of speech/opinion can co-exist.

Then you can keep your choice to yourself and avoid being critical of others because you think they have made an awful decision, when in reality they made the best decision that allows the prosperity of their peace of mind.

bukatyne:

All fingers are not equal, must yours be the shortest?

Truth is nowhere in the Bible teaches women to full housewives, it is more of a Western introduction to Christianity.

Think more than you pray:

Western what? Oh please.... Women as full housewives is a traditional thing for Nigerians. Abeg consult your ancestors for that one.

Acidosis:

The things pastors say without biblical understanding. Where did you get the word "housewife"?

She and her likes need to shut the fck up and allow husbands and wives make whatever decisions they want regarding their finance.

So long as they don't come to you to beg for food or advice, you have no right over their decisions.

gbam, u said my mind

efosky1246:


The loss of a partner is not what anyone expects or prepares for ideally. If you're even going into marriage with this kind of mindset, preparing for the ultimate worst from the onset, then nothing I say will make sense to you.

Even if both partners are working. It would surely take its toll except the man was nothing to write home about. But if there was love and transparency in the marriage. The woman would have access to all finances so in the midst of the grief, she's not entirely lost, she has something to start a business to keep the family afloat, and even at that. will you tell me you've not seen families where the man still provides from the grave via investments?

There are men who pride themselves in taking care of their families. They love doing it, they lead their homes, not control despite being the breadwinner and they appreciate the intrinsic values a woman bring into their life.

I know you can't relate but get out of your toxic circle. They do exist.

Absolutely. I couldn't have drafted it any better. The problem arises when there is no proper communication, transparency, and support between the couple, which in most cases send the wife and children to poverty after sudden demise of the breadwinner. Sometimes, the outsiders even tends to benefit more from the wealth left behind. If everything is very open and the financial pool of the husband is accessible by the wife, this could be avoided..

Nuttella:
What about a mum that goes to work by 8am and comes back by 4pm same time her kids are back from school?
Stay at home mom won't be in school with the kids, will she? So that same time, she can use it to work or even be a teacher.

While the kids are at school, there meals to be planned and prepared, clothes to wash, mend and possibly iron and many other house chores that Home makers do or are you one of the few people that believe Home makers just cross their legs and snore when no one is at home. That's stereotyping and believe me you are so wrong.

pocohantas:
People like her need to understand women are different and couples are different too. There is nothing wrong in being a housewife. It is the sacrifice some women pay for the smooth running of their homes.

As long as they are both okay with it and do not go begging for urgent 2k, you can only wish them well.

Thank you Poco for this. The truth is that a lot of people are not being realistic here. So many families cannot live comfortably on just the husband's income, thus the need for support. Just one month lockdown we all saw the level of online and offline begging all over the place.

Let each couple do what's okay for them ..

saaphiere:
I am seeing someone getting pained because women are about being emancipated from men cage.
Cry me a river

As in hehhhnnn my sister no be small thing�

Her opinion.

Mayflowa:


Housewives are never jobless. They just do Payless job. Caring for home and children all day is definitely harder than working in an office

As if we don't have house helps better quit that weak defense. House chores doesn't earn one an income, so anyone without a paid job is jobless.

She didn't go to school to become a housewife (liability) let her find a job to earn money if it's easier than house chores.

othenok:


While the kids are at school, there meals to be planned and prepared, clothes to wash, mend and possibly iron and many other house chores that Home makers do or are one of the few that Home makers just cross their legs and snore when no one is at home. That's stereotyping and believe me you are so wrong.

A nanny or help can do all that, I no come this world come suffer, if you stress yourself too much in marriage, you will age more than your husband.

Nuttella:
A nanny or help can do all that, I no come this world come suffer, if you stress yourself too much in marriage, you will age more than your husband.

Very easy to say because (we) Nigerians are so fond of using people (including our mothers) and underpaying nannies. Go and try that in a country like Germany and see whether your monthly salary can offset the bills from a nanny. You will hardly even see a day care because the available ones are very competitive, expensive and controlled by the government.

If Nigerian nannies begin to charge #200k per month, a lot of you will have to stay home or quit making babies.

Acidosis:


Very easy to say because (we) Nigerians are so fond of using people and underpaying nannies. Go and try that in a country like Germany and see whether your monthly salary can offset the bills from a nanny. You will hardly even see a day care because the available ones are very competitive, expensive and controlled by the government.

If Nigerian nannies begin to charge #200k per month, a lot of you will have to stay home or quit making babies.

My family friend in USA is a working nurse and also takes care of her kids, so what are you saying?

IAMBlesssed:



Thank you Poco for this. The truth is that a lot of people are not being realistic here. So many families cannot live comfortably on just the husband's income, thus the need for support. Just one month lockdown we all saw the level of online and offline begging all over the place.

Let each couple do what's okay for them ..

Is it not the same thing the woman is preaching? Don't depend on hubby.

Nuttella:
My family friend in USA is a working nurse and also takes care of her kids, so what are you saying?

This information is ambiguous. How is she taking care of her kids and what is the nature of her work/working hours?

Christians watch how a man defended Christ again Muslims and zakir naik
And please subscribe please

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qmhl7HawP8w

Do what works for you. The man going out to hustle while the woman manages the home shouldn't be a bad approach where married couples decides on that. They can also set up a business that the woman can manage and which will also give her the time to manage the home. Don't forget that since we started copying the western world our family values and by extension national values have deteriorated. Father is out, mother is out, children at the mercy of house helps. That is the product of the children you see these days that lacks proper parental guidance. The family structure a couple chooses is their choice as long as it works for them.

You dey mind this motivational speakers, they just talk as if they have the ultimate formula to everything on earth.
Did she know how many housewives shared half of the husband property in a divoce abroad, if the same law apply here. Will she still think housewives are failures? The same woman that said you are a failure if you can't borrow your husband 1million when he needs it, in this same country with the reality on ground? Abeegi

mariahAngel:


As long as they understand each other, I see no problem with it.

A woman who stays at home does not mean she's idle.
If you understand what it takes to keep the home going on a daily basis, you'll know that it is not easy.

Nuttella:
A word is enough for the wise, don't say nuttela did not tell you. Just find a job doing, sha be going out everyday, respect go dey, your husband will not talk to you anyhow, do you even know the joy a man feels when his wife contributes in paying the bills? when gas finish, she fill it with her own money, when the man is not financially buoyant, she helps out, it gives respect, but when you are just there, your whole life is at a halt cause you are married, no sense of fulfilment, just a married woman with kids, I dont know about others o but I personally will feel ashamed of myself. Men come on NL complaining about their wives not doing anything, not contributing to the financial affairs of the family.

true

efosky1246:


So with this your thought process. Why bother getting married then. since upbringing has no effect on children.

Are you that old or ugly that you really think the ultimate value a woman has is in the corporate world?

Children don't respect their mothers that are housewives?

You're messed up, honestly

I read the story of Vice President Osibanjo.
In his words, his father asked his mom to quite job and take care of the children.
Today her children are celebrating her.
If a husband is capable of providing all the financial assistance , what is the need of a house help, A mother is expected to take care of her offspring not paying another person to do so .
maybe when the kids grow up, she might start up something.
Personally I don’t like nursing mothers working because they are unproductive, they always have one complaint about one child to the other.

Sunnymarc:
You dey mind this motivational speakers, they just talk as if they have the ultimate formula to everything on earth.
Did she know how many housewives shared half of the husband property in a divoce abroad, if the same law apply here. Will she still think housewives are failures? The same woman that said you are a failure if you can't borrow your husband 1million when he needs it, in this same country with the reality on ground? Abeegi

She can say whatever sout her , she has people running errands for her, offering and tithe money is giving her account alert

lilyheaven:

She can say whatever sout her , she has people running errands for her, offering and tithe money is giving her account alert

The overall objective is to have those women lining their pockets every Sunday. any so called man/woman of God that preaches material prosperity is fake. 100%. that was not Jesus' message when he walked the earth.

Watin she gain, if tithe money no enter, how can she boast her business if offering money no enter.

efosky1246:


The overall objective is to have those women lining their pockets every Sunday. any so called man/woman of God that preaches material prosperity is fake. 100%. that was not Jesus' message when he walked the earth.

[quote author=Nuttella post=92908074]My family friend in USA is a working nurse and also takes care of her kids, so what are you saying?

the woman just didn't know what to say and open her mouth say trash if her husband says she should not work full time but part time and comes back before him to prepare his food and check on the kids is that a problem.

some ppl will just think with there bum bum

nothing wrong in taken care if the kids and putting the house In other when dad is hard working. so she expect all wife to go hire house help Now..

its just dumb she can have a shop not far from home too and always take time to go keep food. for daddy .

the couple has to plan not her saying all this trash . its there lit not her life for married ppl.

gbam.