Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? - Family - Nairaland
Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? (1204 Views)
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| Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by Muna4real(f): 11:57pm On Oct 04, 2020 |
There are stories of marriages crashing, especially celebrity marriage. It has really discouraged alot of young people out there who are looking forward to getting married someday, like me. From the stories I've heard from the divorce marriages, I've noticed that most of them just endure the marriage irrespective of the unpleasant situations they are facing . The question is, is Marriage supposed to be enjoyed or endured? Personally, I can't endure a marriage. This is because they are two things that are very important to me in my life. My happiness and my security. If these are taken away from me, I would lose my sanity. I cannot stay in a house where I would be beaten. I might be beaten to death. And I can't leave my father's joyful house and come to a house where I cannot be happy. A house where I would be moody and sad all the time. I would also try my best to change the situation. So if my life is at stake, and I'm not happy in a marriage I would pack my bags and go. That's me. I'm not yet married, but let me ask our beloved married nairalanders. Is Marriage supposed to be enjoyed or endured? |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by bukatyne(f): 12:10am On Oct 05, 2020 |
How your marriage is going to be depends on you. If you want to enjoy it, you prepare to enjoy it. This means if you don't prepare to enjoy it, you automatically prepare to 'endure' it. @Endurance: While it is used in a negative context for abuse especially domestic and adultery, you must be prepared to endure some things. Like in life, there are some circumstances you endure for a greater tomorrow. It could circumstances such as living apart, challenging illness, childlessness, loss of job, in-laws interference, initial incompatible sex life, a special needs child, persecution from a spouse if one person converts to another religion etc. While enduring any of the above or other challenges life throws at your marriage (if any), you work towards solutions or acceptance with your spouse. 5 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by Muna4real(f): 12:15am On Oct 05, 2020 |
bukatyne: Hmm Thanks for your contribution. |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by IamD18: 12:15am On Oct 05, 2020 |
All of the above. Saying that marriage is strictly suppose to be enjoyed automatically means you are selfish and not ready to make compromises or face challenges in your marriage. By challenges, I mean Childlessness, unforeseen financial challenges or a lil fallout between you and your partner that should be solved by mere compromise by you. You can't just enjoy your marriage everyday. Impossible. Also, saying that marriage should be strictly endured means you'll shouldn't complain, speak out , but tolerate things that are threat to your peace of mind and mental state. In my opinion, marriage should be enjoyed and endured. Enjoy the positive side so long as it isn't hurting your partner, also endure the negative side so long as it's not a threat to your life or mental state. If you can't endure, don't marry anyone, just marry yourself. 7 Likes 2 Shares |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by Muna4real(f): 12:16am On Oct 05, 2020 |
IamD18: Why are you laughing? |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by merieam16(f): 8:11am On Oct 05, 2020 |
Its both. u endure and at the same time enjoy cos life itself is nt bed of roses |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by Rayes3: 11:24am On Oct 05, 2020 |
Both. You are to enjoy and endure in marriage. And this is applicable to both the husband and the wife . It's not a one sided thing. |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by Dtruthspeaker: 1:27pm On Oct 05, 2020 |
Muna4real: Which one do you want? After you decide, then the "Law of As you Lay Your Bed..." Shall be immediately Implemented! 1 Like |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by virginprincess(f): 3:32pm On Oct 05, 2020 |
Marriage is not a bed of roses, it has both good and bad side, personally for me i pray don't have a marriage that i will regret, but if the problem becomes too much you leave, marriage is not by force. |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by Righteousness89(m): 3:44pm On Oct 05, 2020 |
Marriage is to be Enjoyed and Endured! Enjoyed because it is God's Institution Created to Complete a Man/ Woman.. Enjoyed because 2 Heads are better than 1 Enjoyed because its a legal way for the Man and Wife to Ravish and get Ravished.. Endured because it's not always a bed of Roses. Endured because you are 2 different humans with different traits and attitudes. One Sure Fact I know is that if you Both can Conciously Rest on GOD as the Foundation of your Home you will Sail through Sweetly and Successfully! |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by Evacroft: 4:14pm On Oct 05, 2020 |
Marriage is all about commitment, not from one but both spouse. The mistake most pple make is leave the commitment part to one party. Sometimes marriage is one sided and pple believe they have a good husband / wife cos they ain't aware or haven't paid enough attention to their spouses sacrifices to make it smooth for them. Endurance is the ability to endure an unpleasant or difficult process or situation without giving way. So yes marriage is to be enjoyed and also endured, that's why the phrase for better or worse comes into the vow. Also, I believe God himself knows how hard its for a man to love one woman(his wife) for the rest of his life and how hard it is for a woman to submit to her husband, hence the commandments to do so. 1 Like |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by Muna4real(f): 5:19pm On Oct 05, 2020 |
Righteousness89: This pastor sef. You have come again. |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by VirginFinder: 6:14pm On Oct 05, 2020 |
Dotherightthing: |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by GboyegaD(m): 7:41pm On Oct 05, 2020 |
It is both however, with the enjoyment (fulfillment) outweighing the endurance (sacrifice). 2 Likes |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by ImaIma1(f): 9:23pm On Oct 05, 2020 |
I believe it should have more enjoyment than endurance. Enjoyment as per you love each and look out for each other. Endurance may come when you are trying to adapt to and accomodate him/her or when some situations come and try to break you. If it is a healthy relationship, you endure difficult times together. The marriages with plenty turmoil, beating, or any form of abuse from either party are not the standard. Those are bad examples that try to outshine the good ones. |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by ednut1(m): 12:44am On Oct 06, 2020 |
Muna4real:you do not have to get married. Marriage is a tradition institution that favors men. Women are now waking up. But unlike in the oyinbo labd where women have ditched marriage 9ja women still want it. Lol |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by Muna4real(f): 12:51am On Oct 06, 2020 |
ednut1: Hmm. It looks like you don't like marriage. But anyways, you know how unmarried women are treated in Nigeria. So women dream of getting married not minding if it favours men more or not. |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by ednut1(m): 1:10am On Oct 06, 2020 |
Muna4real:sure i like marriage. Only stating the facts. Majority of 9ja women are enduring it. |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by Juliearth(f): 7:35am On Oct 06, 2020 |
Yes, there are bad marriages and that sometimes, leaves me to question the availability of marriageable men... However, it is possible to enjoy your marriage and most of the effort boils down to you: 1. Communication is key in a marriage and it is a weapon that enforces peace. Learn how to use it. 2. Do not snoop. I know it is always tempting to want to play detective, but your findings will most times, leave you broken. I have come to understand that men are most times, naturally flirtatious, but in some of these cases, they are only doing it for the fun of it and nothing more. Snooping and seeing such suggestive messages would break you, make him angry that you snooped, create a chasm in communication and if care is not taken, that may be the beginning of your marital woes. 3. Marry your friend. Love fizzles out, but when you marry your friend, the spark is always there. 4. You should know your partner in-total, understsnd what he likes and dislikes and try to act accordingly. The list is endless, but have it at the back of your mind that it is possible to have an enjoyable home. |
| Re: Is Marriage Supposed To Be Enjoyed Or Endured? by faithfull18(f): 12:09pm On Oct 06, 2020 |
Choice(s). |
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