Yes! I got your attention and i promise to make it worthwhile.

But first, let me add this

DISCLAIMER:

Everything in this post are just opinions and partly picked from experience and research, i am not a marriage counsellor or sex therapist.

Now that we have that cleared out, let's proceed!

I have seen several married couples and noticed how sexually distant they are - just by their gestures and attempts of intimacy in public.

Thing is, some of them aren't sexually active and frown at any sex hype they stumble across - because they can no longer relate and find sex tiring.

There are many reasons why couples may not enjoy sex or find it interesting. Here are a FEW


Cont'd in the comments.

1. IT HAS ALREADY BECOME A CHORE.

Yes! Chores can be boring and very repetitive. Some couples turn sex into chores.

They either only have sex when they need kids or repeat the same position every time they are in bed.

It gets dry and both partners can't look forward to anything new. To handle this, couples should try to be more receptive and explore sex guilt-free.

2. 0% ROMANCE

Here's another big culprit!

When there is no seduction, pre-intimacy or caressing of any kind - there might be problems.

A good number of couples prefer not to beat about the bush and go straight to the point - denying themselves of immense pleasure!

This shortens sex, makes it less intimate and more robotic.

3. BAD RELATIONSHIP OUTSIDE THE BEDROOM

What happens when two couples are not in bed?

Do they have a healthy relationship, use pet names or happy they are together

If the reverse is the case, there is a good chance love-making won't be any different.

4. KIDS CAME IN THE WAY

Children are blessings, but they can also ruin what happens in the other room.

Why? Responsibilities increase and the marriage starts to feel more burdensome!

To handle this, couples need to strike a balance, not get carried away and keep their sex life burning!

5. THEY ARE SHY TO TALK THINGS OUT

It will surprise you to know that some couples don't know how to have sex at the very basic level.

Instead of talking it out, trying, failing and getting better - many choose to keep quiet and assume they are doing it well.

One partner may want it more than the other

One partner may prefer one position more

No one will know without talking!

That is all i can pour out from my head and trust me, i know marriages that fall in all 5 categories!

Do you agree or disagree with any?

Drop a comment

If you're married, please talk to your spouse more before, during or after sex.

Don't be angry by the response, nobody is perfect.

Ask if he/she enjoyed it, what could have made it better etc.

Silent treatment before, during and after sex is old-school and does not help

nwaezeemmanuel:
5. THEY ARE SHY TO TALK THINGS OUT

It will surprise you to know that some couples don't know how to have sex at the very basic level.

Instead of talking it out, trying, failing and getting better - many choose to keep quiet and assume they are doing it well.

One partner may want it more than the other

One partner may prefer one position more

No one will know without talking!

Try to switch things up!

Sex becomes boring when things get monotonous.

If you're religious, trying different moves with your spouse is not a sin - you are both free to do whatever you wish to do (as much as it is healthy and approved)

nwaezeemmanuel:
1. IT HAS ALREADY BECOME A CHORE.

Yes! Chores can be boring and very repetitive. Some couples turn sex into chores.

They either only have sex when they need kids or repeat the same position every time they are in bed.

It gets dry and both partners can't look forward to anything new. To handle this, couples should try to be more receptive and explore sex guilt-free.

Hope you found this useful to a degree

If you have reasons why you believe sex gets boring after marriage, feel free to drop them here.

Would love to learn and discuss!

Doesn't matter how creative you are in bed cause after months/years of hitting it, a time will come when you'll struggle to get it up for that same person; not cause you have problem or anything related but they just don't "excite" you anymore.

If you're in a marriage, you will have to make it work

No matter how unexcited a person is, i believe there are things one can do to still make sex enjoyable.

lilmonarch:
Doesn't matter how creative you are in bed cause after months/years of hitting it, a time will come when you'll struggle to get it up for that same person; not cause you have problem or anything related but they just don't excite you anymore.

Thanks for commenting

Very educative even as it shows my sorry state

I think relationship outside the bedroom matters a lot. With this,even shyness will go away.

I can't wait to finally get married. When I can enjoy sex with peace of mind.

2-3 thrusting before going to work

meanwhile somebody said 'sex is overrated' Someone should explain this abeg

I believe sex between married couples should remain between them, after all tgey both agreed to marry themselves. If it gets to a point where the man and woman cannot resolve their sexual issues by themselves then they are just wasting their lives by allowing such marriage - bondage to continue. The only ones I pity are those who got married without pre marital bleeping i.e no marriage no sex scams. Those people are equivalent to all these 9jabet gamblers, chances of sexual compatibility (virginity intact or not) in such union is same as when you pair 5 different games on betnaija and expect to get them all correct. E no dey end well

Dayoebe:
I can't wait to finally get married. When I can enjoy sex with peace of mind.


2-3 thrusting before going to work

bro u wicked oo.
I am not married ooo but bro can u be thrusting when u are thinking of how to pay junior's school fees, mama and papa health bills, house rent, light bill, food expenses, transportation expenses, brothers and sisters assistance with some cash and your wife family bills?
Bro, think am na.
Marriage no be moi-moi oo.
Kudos to all the married people.
..

Telegram234:
thinking of how to pay junior's school fees, mama and papa health bills, house rent, light bill, food expenses, transportation expenses, brothers and sisters assistance with some cash and your wife family bills?
Bro, think am na.
Marriage no be moi-moi oo.
Kudos to all the married people.
..

God is in charge of all that!

Dayoebe:


God is in charge of all that!

u see the problem of africans. Noooo isrealites 4 still remain for egypt because God is in charge. What happen to dat verse dat says Faith without work is dead. #endsars

Telegram234:
bro u wicked oo.
I am not married ooo but bro can u be thrusting when u are thinking of how to pay junior's school fees, mama and papa health bills, house rent, light bill, food expenses, transportation expenses, brothers and sisters assistance with some cash and your wife family bills?
Bro, think am na.
Marriage no be moi-moi oo.
Kudos to all the married people.
..

I still don't understand why wife's family bills should be part of the responsibilities of the husband or anything to worry about.

I have a sister who has been married for decades now, our family has never been her husband's responsibilities.

We should learn to give married men breathing space; marriage shouldn't be a burden.

nwaezeemmanuel:
That is all i can pour out from my head and trust me, i know marriages that fall in all 5 categories!

Do you agree or disagree with any?

Drop a comment

More

Same style

Disrespect

Depression/Stress

Responsibilities

6.See finish before getting married.
7.Tight schedules
8.Low sex appeal after marriage
9.Kinks or sex preference that irritates the other partner
8.Diseases and infections that leads to low libido
ETC

Dayoebe:
I can't wait to finally get married. When I can enjoy sex with peace of mind.


2-3 thrusting before going to work


meanwhile somebody said 'sex is overrated'
Someone should explain this abeg

You can get it anywhere now

Well said!

Emphasis on DEPRESSION/STRESS

femi4:
More

Same style

Disrespect

Depression/Stress

Responsibilities

Definitely! If the relationship is bad, the sex most likely will be.

StacyO:
I think relationship outside the bedroom matters a lot. With this,even shyness will go away.

My guy, it's a bad idea to have sex before going to work

The time doesn't just seem right, at all.

Dayoebe:
I can't wait to finally get married. When I can enjoy sex with peace of mind.


2-3 thrusting before going to work


meanwhile somebody said 'sex is overrated'
Someone should explain this abeg

I don't think sex is overrated, it is what you make it out to be.

Some people that say it's overrated don't enjoy it or aren't doing it right - sex can be very very pleasurable and rewarding.

All in all, you determine your sex life - not other people.

Dayoebe:
I can't wait to finally get married. When I can enjoy sex with peace of mind.


2-3 thrusting before going to work


meanwhile somebody said 'sex is overrated'
Someone should explain this abeg

Listen! Not having premarital sex does not translate to bad sex life when married.

Whether you've had so much sex before settling down, you can still have hiccups with sex after getting married

PUNAengineOIL:
I believe sex between married couples should remain between them, after all tgey both agreed to marry themselves. If it gets to a point where the man and woman cannot resolve their sexual issues by themselves then they are just wasting their lives by allowing such marriage - bondage to continue. The only ones I pity are those who got married without pre marital bleeping i.e no marriage no sex scams. Those people are equivalent to all these 9jabet gamblers, chances of sexual compatibility (virginity intact or not) in such union is same as when you pair 5 different games on betnaija and expect to get them all correct. E no dey end well

Wife's family bills is not a responsibility of every husband.

For some, it can be a show of kind gesture as not every woman comes from a very dependent family.

peeps4u:


I still don't understand why wife's family bills should be part of the responsibilities of the husband or anything to worry about.

I have a sister who has been married for decades now, our family has never been her husband's responsibilities.

We should learn to give married men breathing space; marriage shouldn't be a burden.

Spot on!

JOACHINpedro:
6.See finish before getting married.
7.Tight schedules
8.Low sex appeal after marriage
9.Kinks or sex preference that irritates the other partner
8.Diseases and infections that leads to low libido
ETC