This is a true life story with original names and titles. The aim of this story is to serve my experience to others

This narration does not fall under any literature genre. Grammatical arrangements are not decent and proof reading wasn't done. It follows community square kind of narration.

Agbarho is a town in Agbon clan under ughelli north lga.




I have loved to the point of madness, that which is madness, is the only sensible way i see that is love..... This thing called love. What is it, why is it to difficult, why is it strange ?

It started december 4th, 2010. I met my first love,
Stella, an epitome of beauty, though it was a bet to win her over ..Then after was to have her and go away, i never believed anything else. But she proved me wrong, i found myself in her spell and before i knew it, love has taken over my soul.

The feeling was new because i never had anyone that showed me genuine love before. She was the very first. She would cook for me, spend time with me and even plan with me. It was as if God has answered my prayers even before i muttered "hail Mary".

I was still a student as at the time. My family lived in Warri Outskirt, a little community known as Agbarho. I usually go there for a visit and to remind myself of where i am from. She wasn't a student, as a matter of fact, she failed her ssce exams. I was only three years older than her. Her name became the most important noun to me then "Stella", i would say....

Fast forward to three months later, i left town for school in Abraka. It wasn't easy not being with my love but we both know that right thing to do. I must go to school, graduate and marry her. Oh yes, we planned it well....


She would call to gist me about the day, well, i was feeling like a prince, the fresh Prince of Bel-Air, lol. It wasn't long after she stopped returning my calls, the love was fading and fear started creeping in. One-day, she rained insult on me after i asked her where she went to....

I was emotionally wrecked, so i left Delsu to Agbarho to see her and fix the issues on ground. Right there at where we met, she gave me a piece of her mind. Her insult always penetrates me because i don't do anything to warrant them. She was just angry at the slightest sensation. Two days later, we met again and i took her phone when she left to urinate, i saw all the love texts she was sending to a guy. Telling the dude about love. *DJ dras* wasn't a personality to reckon with. Unpopular and what Warri would say "thug*... But here my baby girl was begging him for love...

I cried bitterly. I arranged a meeting with the dude without her knowing, turned out the dude was just using her, he admitted it with an advise to give him sometime to enjoy her first....

I was dumbfounded, worst of it all, is that she came to me and warned me when she found out i approached *Dj dras*. The heartbreak was too much on me, i was too soft for this and so i drank myself to stupor.... This was the beginning of my mysery

To Be Continued....

Come and finish it here. Ok next

Amkanta02:
Come and finish it here. Ok next

He has gone to drink to stupor again.

The greatest feeling is not love, but the thought that someone's cares about you, even if it's an illusion...A false reality could have much much impact tool.

After the error of indulgence between me and Stella, i left town that same evening. I was angry and sad and bought two black bullet along to the bus. The fellow passengers consoled me not to cry. "It's not the end of the world, she doesn't deserves you, she's wicked..." more and more they keep trying to comfort me as i cry in the bus calling her name "Stella, why why ?". That night i could not sleep, i was awake screaming her name, it was as if i lost my sanity, oh no, i did lost my sanity.... She was the only person in the whole world that made me feel sufficient, how could she do this to me ?. My roommate even made effort to stabilise me, i was admitted the next day to the school health centre, doctor was concerned about my suicidal tendencies so they injected me with Diezapam to do whatever it does....

It took more than time to discharge me from the health centre. I had to drop my position as the department class rep due to some mental health issues.... I was behaving psycho. My academic grades dropped down rapidly and people started gossiping me out, "Daniel is crazy".


That period i went into drugs, consuming tramadol to ease my pain. This drug gave me a false sense of reality, it helps. I was able to lie to myself that she would come to me again and that she is bittered and sad that i left her.... My delusion of grandeur was way out of the ordinary, riding expensive cars with her by my side, living good and having babies with her.... My mind was completely shattered and the only weapon that made me better was the delusion my mind created.

I was made at that period to understand what heartbreak feels like. I know now why people end their life due to heartbreak, it was more painful than i imagined. Scientists say the part of the brain that processes pains also processes heartbreak.... Being under ice, well, it was far worse, maybe being in the fire, the hell fire that we talk off. It wasn't funny, i realised this period that i had nothing to live for, i have built my destiny on her. You know the crab theory, where none of the crabs could leave the basket because they all struggle to.... Yes, that was what happened to me, my dreams and aspirations well built into her and now i could barely set myself free....

Four months later, a friend called me to inform me that the said DJ is having his engagement party. I was bewildered, happiness creeps back, i will finally have my Stella, i said to myself. That day, i borrowed money and travelled back to town. I had to see her, it was time to get things straight... I found myself in her church that Wendesday, i had to attend the service just to see her. I was on my best clothes. When she saw me, she looked away, a chorister, that's what she is.

After the service, we talked and it was then that i realised that the heartbreak she experienced from the DJ's engagement to another lady made her lost her joy... She was sad and i wanted to be something more, a lover again. I tried to look at the signs of her acceptance, I was obviously still in love...

To be continued....

Amkanta02:
Come and finish it here. Ok next

check

dannex4adx:


He has gone to drink to stupor again.

check

Pls continue

uncle pls com and continue�

When the preacher says scripture warns against premarital relationship, i thought the preacher was jealous of my happiness, i never knew it was God special remedy against the scorn of a woman.

Our reunion was short-lived, it was a case of a dude trying to force his way into the heart of a woman. My desperation for validation was obvious, she could sense it even without me saying anything. I would go to her house well dressed to see her, most times, i would be welcomed with her absence even though she knew i was coming.

I became accustomed to her schedule. I was always around when she was, she barely stays around, always out for a task i had no idea off.

One-day she welcomed me in her sitting room. No one was around and she was Hot, she pulled off her pant and was about to clock me in when she looked away and stopped. "What happened ?" i asked, still not sure if i offended her. She said nothing and put her clothes on. I was confused as she refused to say anything about it. I left that day not sure if i had fallen off the pyramid. Well, the meagre thought of her even looking at me gave me huge joy, i slept that night thanking my stars, showing appreciation to God and dreaming of a better tomorrow.

The next morning i left after being sure her mother had gone to the market. Her cousin brother greeted me and welcomed me, he seems to have been fond of me. He was nice to me and that gave me a comforting impression of acceptance. At this time, i was 25 years old, a university diploma holder, a BSC holder and a student on 2nd degree study.

"Well, she is not home... I think she is at the house of that her area ex boyfriend again" he said. The statement penetrated my heart, it weakened my soul and crippled the joy i had the day before. I couldn't stand it so i left in anger to the direction he pointed to me. I knocked on the door, called her name, a voice came off the window rudely "Daniel, wetin(what) ?, leave me joor." I called her again, with a faint apologetic voice, "Stella, please i want to speak to you..." The dude walked out with two other dudes and just there i perceived trouble. They told me to leave, i left that day with my face facing the ground and tears dripping off my eyes... "God, i don't deserve this... I just want to be loved, i just want her to love me."

The next day, the cousin called me over and tried to patch things up between us, Stella admitted to loving me but, just but.... She could not give any reasonable reason why she behaved the way she did. I forgave her and we had a new relationship again, a relationship that lasted for 19 hours, the next day, she was with the other dude and this time, she walked down to me while the other dude giggled in mockery, "i don't want, i don't like you.." My heart, i could hardly imagined how i could have looked. I was way beyond my elastic limit and when i got home that day, i cried, took overdose of tramadol and other mixtures just to die, well, i passed out but was welcomed the next day with the kiss of the sun on my face through the window....

A new day, a new dawn, but still the old me.....


To Be Continued....

continue

hummm... so sympathetic, continue

There are no better heavens than the ones created in our moments with the devil...

Everything i experienced while i was in my struggles to find love was well deserved. My undue suffering and rejection....

After the last break up and rejection, i resorted to other means to please myself, first i had to Start a new relationship, it was difficult starting a relationship over again. As a resigned course rep, my love and admiration became less, people started pouring out their enclosed aggression openly, everyone in my department became relentless towards me, everyone absolutely. I began to see hate around me. At this point in time, all i wanted was love and encouragement, a feeling that betters days still is, not even love, just to be revered was okay at this time, yet, i could not get none.

To top my mysery i became dead broke. Money wasn't on me and the fear that i had to pay my school fees started giving me high sugar. I became aware sooner that i could go cold turkey if i repent on my drugs, how could i afford the drugs when i could not afford my meal. My caretaker was also on my neck for my house rent. It was a difficult period for me.

I would trek to school with shame in my guilt and the very thought that i had no one. No one wanted me, no one would calle to check up on me, i yearned for attention. I became an object of mockery, a reference whenever someone referred to being poor. It was hard on me and i needed this Stella to help me walk through the valley together.

How could a guy with a pair of trouser and two tops think of having a girlfriend ?, well, i completely lost the reason to get another girl. But the very thought of my past with Stella hurts me to the cap. I would sit and blame my mystery on the fact that my childhood has always been about my family accusing me of witchcraft and never standing for me whenever i got into trouble. All i began to look for was the reason behind my mystery. But then, i could be happier and perhaps the goddess of good luck would smile at me if Stella was kind enough to show me love, lol.

At a time, i had two close friends when i was the class representative, a fat dude i nicknamed "Fatso" and an older pal "Great". Great was an influential figure in my department, with a red car and a fancy achievement. No girl would resist Great's charm then. He was the wealthiest dude in the department. Fatso wasn't doing bad himself, he had quite a lot going on for him. Good fashion sense, handsomeness and financially buoyant even though he didn't get himself a car. The painful thing is that i had these two people as a plus two while i was the class representative, but after i lost, they became cold and hostile towards me, they showed me the door and pushed me out. They would not pick my call and when we were in school, they would avoid walking with me. I was stigmatized for existing and loving. It was so painful then.

I wanted a vision to live, hope to survive, i could not give myself a better one than the thought of me making it soon from my street hustle. I had to develop that mindset even when all the odds were against me. My mind became the most powerful force to me, i would fantasize on being a happy person, having all i wished for... But when the mind failed one or two times, i would attempt suicide, all of which proved to be futile.

My grades dropped, i started acting like a mad man, i say crazy stuffs and proliferated my madness, lol. All of these would have been nothing to me if only Stella was there with me, but she wasn't. It was a difficult world then, and i stood my ground and faced it......

To be continued...

I have no friends than the tales in my head, where kingdom rises and slaves become kings



I had a boring moment at a time, the period where i wallow in confusion. I was caught up in-between emotions, love and stability. While i prayed for her returns, i also yearn for my financial appropriation. I had quite a few friends, female friends from the past that considered my wellbeing a top priority, but i could stress non about myself, i could barely care more, it was a world where i neglect those that care for those that doesn't.

One of my ever being loved paddy was "Tracy", Tracy and i have come a long way. It was when i was running my diploma course, we became good friends and soon people started thinking we had something going. She was fantabulous, chubby and good looking, but the feeling just wasn't there. In our second semester in diploma program, she introduced me to her friend whom later became part of our friends circle. A good looking girl with an amazing statue, the type that made me salivate for more.... Lol, this period, i have not met Stella, it was actually four six years later that i met Stella.

"Blessing", yes, that's her name, came up strong with her emotions, it was a good shot that i never expected. I have not had you know, that thing...lol.. I had two significant memories with Blessing, one was the day she wanted to drop out due to inability to pay her fees, i didn't want that so i had to run round to make sure she did, luck was on my side and she paid, yes, she paid and became indebted to me. I could careless about the financial debt than the emotional one. I would think her love for me has heightened and that my kindness would bring us together. She started asking for small favours, from food to fees, all of which Tracy didn't even ask from me. I was a sucker for love and my mugu button was activated, nawa o, i be complete Maga that year Sha.

The second memory was the day she invited me to her house, it was clear we were about to swim together on her bed. It was my first, and i was anxious but still i could do nothing with her, though she wowed me with her sexuality, skimpy clothing, make-up on, and well arranged room, we even sat on the bed and she touched me, still i was shy enough to avoid intimacy with her. Eventually she got bored and we finally decided it's the time i start going, her roommate came not long after and both friends decided to stroll me out to the place where i could get a cab. The strange thing is that as we were about crossing an hospital, she said something about a medical doctor she is dating. I was jealous when i heard this, how could she do this to me ? But then my naivety prompted me to request an audience with the dude, it was my jealousy acting repulsively. The issue escalated as she disagreed with me but i had to, i took my stand. Well, she told me blatantly that i was a fool, and professed her undying love to the doctor....


To me, the psychology of women has no pattern, indefinitely unpredictable. One could not understand why a lady would love a guy that dishes her hot slap and call her names over a guy that cares and respects her... Speaking of looks, the nice guy could be better looking, but the nature of a woman would dance around the arrogant guy over the heavenly manufactured follow-come. Later on, Tracy told me she gave the money i borrowed her to the doctor. She gave him money often. That incidence renovated my thinking about women.

One other incidence is my experience with a darling, Amaka. Amaka was a product of heavenly divine, she was truly an angel. Our union was a magic experience to me, first, she identified with me as a friend when i arrived class late one day and also, she sympathized with me as a sister, when i lost someone....

She was what i would call, an undeserved lover, her love for me wasn't in secret even though she was the beauty of the department. She made it public that she admires me. She invited me to her place on various occasions, all of which i didn't make love to her, but i had my moments, she was ready but i just wasn't. I wanted to but my will was weak so it's always end with me shying off...

I started having issues with Amaka after a friend told me he would want to date her. Bros over hoes, i stood beside my friend on this one. I was the middle man and then i told Amaka about him, how dare you ? She said, she started weeping and told me she didn't expect that from me. From there henceforth it became series of unexplained juvenile behaviour on my side. Our union is un-amendable up till now. Well, it was a memory i cherished at all times.

Life sha, all these memories are what paved the way for my sexual experiences in later years, including Stella's tales...


To be continued