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If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love - Romance - Nairaland

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A Letter Of Apology For Being Too Jealous. / Who Is More Jealous In A Relationship,the Guy Or The Girl? / He's Jealous?! What In God's Name For?! (2) (3) (4)

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If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by 190: 12:04am On Mar 18, 2011
I had read the above mentioned quote as a youngster and it is true to some extent. Being jealous and having feelings of envy are normal to human nature. A little bit of jealousy combined with possessiveness is healthy, but if the same goes beyond control so much so that one of the partner feels suffocated in the relationship or one of the partner is constantly checking on the other, it can lead to a lot of social embarrassment.

How do you detect that you are jealous or over possessive? If you find yourself constantly wondering what the person is doing and not because you miss the other person but because you are jealous and feel that the partner may be with another man or woman, this kind of thought process will lead to suspicion, jealousy and can prove to be detrimental to a healthy relationship especially if you call up your partner several times in a day just to check where the other person is?

This kind of jealousy in the relationship will lead to fights and arguments till a point comes in the relationship when one of the partners walks out. This may even lead to a break-up or a divorce.

If you are exhibiting any of the above mentioned signs its time for you to examine your behavior and determine the cause of your behavior. Ask yourself a few relevant questions like why do you have these feelings of jealousy? Why do you want to constantly check on your partner? Try to find out the root cause of your behavior, is it because you genuinely believe that your partner is overly flirtatious or you have strong feelings of inadequacy.

Often jealousy stems from strong feelings of inadequacy or a low self-esteem. We may either berate ourselves constantly or always criticize a member of the opposite sex.

Please remember jealousy does not enhance your attraction in any way, in fact you appear to be a person who always harbors ill will towards others.

The next though that crops up in everybody’s mind is how to curb jealous thoughts in oneself or one’s partner? Don’t worry there are many solutions to curb jealousy and build a healthy relationship.

The first step in dealing with any kind of jealousy is to recognize that you or your partner is facing a problem of extreme jealousy. Firstly realize the fact that if your partner is a flirt or has actually been unfaithful, checking constantly on him or her is not really going to change them however if they have not done anything then it surely will annoy them and may make them feel suffocated.

So the thumb rule is unless you have caught them doing something do not suspect. Believe them if they offer an explanation for their behavior. Also get rid of any feelings of inadequacy, because if the partner is with you then it definitely is out of choice and not any kind of compulsion.

If you are the one of those who has an overly jealous or possessive partner then I suggest that you find out what is the cause of this jealousy and possessiveness. Is it originating from your behavior or the cause is something else. Find out if you have either neglected your partner or unfairly compared them with someone else. If it is either of these then make changes to your behavior and if you feel that your partner has some psychological problems then suggest that they see a counselor and instead of stating that your partner see a counselor which may offend them suggest that both should see a counselor to understand what the problem is.

Handling the issue of jealousy in a relationship with sensitivity and understanding can cause the feelings of jealousy to die a slow death and mutual trust and understanding in the relationship will grow leading to a happy and fulfilling relationship.
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by tjskii(f): 12:19am On Mar 18, 2011
come what is all this plenty gist about tongue tongue
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by 190: 12:38am On Mar 18, 2011
ROTFL,
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Nobody: 2:38am On Mar 18, 2011
Definite copy and paste material.

@subject
False false false. I am definitely not a jealous person and I love just as much.
Ps Sorry couldn't be bothered to read past the first paragraph.
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Nobody: 2:44am On Mar 18, 2011
I disagree. I don't get jealous when I'm in relationships because I trust that my feelings for him are reciprocal and that he won't do anything to please the 3rd party. If I think he's capable of cheating, then we wouldn't be together in the first place cool
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by amefi(m): 7:47am On Mar 18, 2011
190:

I had read the above mentioned quote as a youngster and it is true to some extent. Being jealous and having feelings of envy are normal to human nature. A little bit of jealousy combined with possessiveness is healthy, but if the same goes beyond control so much so that one of the partner feels suffocated in the relationship or one of the partner is constantly checking on the other, it can lead to a lot of social embarrassment.

How do you detect that you are jealous or over possessive? If you find yourself constantly wondering what the person is doing and not because you miss the other person but because you are jealous and feel that the partner may be with another man or woman, this kind of thought process will lead to suspicion, jealousy and can prove to be detrimental to a healthy relationship especially if you call up your partner several times in a day just to check where the other person is?

This kind of jealousy in the relationship will lead to fights and arguments till a point comes in the relationship when one of the partners walks out. This may even lead to a break-up or a divorce.

If you are exhibiting any of the above mentioned signs its time for you to examine your behavior and determine the cause of your behavior. Ask yourself a few relevant questions like why do you have these feelings of jealousy? Why do you want to constantly check on your partner? Try to find out the root cause of your behavior, is it because you genuinely believe that your partner is overly flirtatious or you have strong feelings of inadequacy.

Often jealousy stems from strong feelings of inadequacy or a low self-esteem. We may either berate ourselves constantly or always criticize a member of the opposite sex.

Please remember jealousy does not enhance your attraction in any way, in fact you appear to be a person who always harbors ill will towards others.

The next though that crops up in everybody’s mind is how to curb jealous thoughts in oneself or one’s partner? Don’t worry there are many solutions to curb jealousy and build a healthy relationship.

The first step in dealing with any kind of jealousy is to recognize that you or your partner is facing a problem of extreme jealousy. Firstly realize the fact that if your partner is a flirt or has actually been unfaithful, checking constantly on him or her is not really going to change them however if they have not done anything then it surely will annoy them and may make them feel suffocated.

So the thumb rule is unless you have caught them doing something do not suspect. Believe them if they offer an explanation for their behavior. Also get rid of any feelings of inadequacy, because if the partner is with you then it definitely is out of choice and not any kind of compulsion.

If you are the one of those who has an overly jealous or possessive partner then I suggest that you find out what is the cause of this jealousy and possessiveness. Is it originating from your behavior or the cause is something else. Find out if you have either neglected your partner or unfairly compared them with someone else. If it is either of these then make changes to your behavior and if you feel that your partner has some psychological problems then suggest that they see a counselor and instead of stating that your partner see a counselor which may offend them suggest that both should see a counselor to understand what the problem is.

Handling the issue of jealousy in a relationship with sensitivity and understanding can cause the feelings of jealousy to die a slow death and mutual trust and understanding in the relationship will grow leading to a happy and fulfilling relationship.



Mr 190, your write up is too long try n make summary next time. d red color is nt helpin. i cant even read cus it's making me have diplopia (double vision). cheers.
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by SALady(f): 7:51am On Mar 18, 2011
Sorry but I went as far as the word possessiveness in your first two lines. There is no need to be a jealous lover. You just have to realise that people will only be with you because its what they want to do and that you have no control over it in any way whatsoever, so forget it.
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by nanidee(f): 8:31am On Mar 18, 2011
190 and all these long write ups, na wa o

angry angry
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by 190: 9:57am On Mar 18, 2011
undecided undecided
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by alagha: 3:14pm On Mar 18, 2011
love itself started with jealousy from adam.
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by uzoronwusa: 8:56am On Mar 29, 2011
well done 190.i think u've done a good job through ur write up.dont think its a matter of i agree or disagree, true or false.the issue here is that are u having this problem? if so take the advice and change.thank u. smiley
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by yusuf2(m): 10:25am On Mar 29, 2011
190:

I had read the above mentioned quote as a youngster and it is true to some extent. Being jealous and having feelings of envy are normal to human nature. A little bit of jealousy combined with possessiveness is healthy, but if the same goes beyond control so much so that one of the partner feels suffocated in the relationship or one of the partner is constantly checking on the other, it can lead to a lot of social embarrassment.

How do you detect that you are jealous or over possessive? If you find yourself constantly wondering what the person is doing and not because you miss the other person but because you are jealous and feel that the partner may be with another man or woman, this kind of thought process will lead to suspicion, jealousy and can prove to be detrimental to a healthy relationship especially if you call up your partner several times in a day just to check where the other person is?

This kind of jealousy in the relationship will lead to fights and arguments till a point comes in the relationship when one of the partners walks out. This may even lead to a break-up or a divorce.

If you are exhibiting any of the above mentioned signs its time for you to examine your behavior and determine the cause of your behavior. Ask yourself a few relevant questions like why do you have these feelings of jealousy? Why do you want to constantly check on your partner? Try to find out the root cause of your behavior, is it because you genuinely believe that your partner is overly flirtatious or you have strong feelings of inadequacy.

Often jealousy stems from strong feelings of inadequacy or a low self-esteem. We may either berate ourselves constantly or always criticize a member of the opposite sex.

Please remember jealousy does not enhance your attraction in any way, in fact you appear to be a person who always harbors ill will towards others.

The next though that crops up in everybody’s mind is how to curb jealous thoughts in oneself or one’s partner? Don’t worry there are many solutions to curb jealousy and build a healthy relationship.

The first step in dealing with any kind of jealousy is to recognize that you or your partner is facing a problem of extreme jealousy. Firstly realize the fact that if your partner is a flirt or has actually been unfaithful, checking constantly on him or her is not really going to change them however if they have not done anything then it surely will annoy them and may make them feel suffocated.

So the thumb rule is unless you have caught them doing something do not suspect. Believe them if they offer an explanation for their behavior. Also get rid of any feelings of inadequacy, because if the partner is with you then it definitely is out of choice and not any kind of compulsion.

If you are the one of those who has an overly jealous or possessive partner then I suggest that you find out what is the cause of this jealousy and possessiveness. Is it originating from your behavior or the cause is something else. Find out if you have either neglected your partner or unfairly compared them with someone else. If it is either of these then make changes to your behavior and if you feel that your partner has some psychological problems then suggest that they see a counselor and instead of stating that your partner see a counselor which may offend them suggest that both should see a counselor to understand what the problem is.

Handling the issue of jealousy in a relationship with sensitivity and understanding can cause the feelings of jealousy to die a slow death and mutual trust and understanding in the relationship will grow leading to a happy and fulfilling relationship.

blah blah blah, *feeling dizzy*
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by kaycrystal(m): 10:48am On Mar 29, 2011
d only time u decide to be reasonable, u are over doing it! damn too long, but nice try though! undecided
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by desertboom(m): 4:34pm On Mar 29, 2011
Copy and paste material. Sooner or later this same person will call our Nigerian girls dumb, silly and cheap. Try to be original bro. No offense
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by CrudeOil2(m): 4:39pm On Mar 29, 2011
Absolutely correct!
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Thirst4Lif: 5:20pm On Mar 29, 2011
Please choose the color of your fonts a little more wisely.

It's very difficult to read when it's in Red.
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by 190: 7:27pm On Mar 29, 2011
I force una READ!! grin grin grin
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by jkay1(m): 1:09am On Mar 30, 2011
I read only the topic. I think i understand what d body meant from it. No need for long thing.
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Nobody: 1:30am On Mar 30, 2011
@ topic title. that is not true.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-616369.0.html#msg7842435

D irony  tongue.


A little bit of jealousy combined with possessiveness is healthy, but if the same goes beyond control so much so that one of the partner feels suffocated in the relationship or one of the partner is constantly checking on the other, it can lead to a lot of social embarrassment.

*cough! errrrm cough!*  tongue  tongue

Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by 190: 1:38am On Mar 30, 2011
[size=3pt]^^ keep exposing your nyash in public shocked shocked[/size]
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Nobody: 2:03am On Mar 30, 2011
[size=5pt]i dont think there is enough room grin grin tongue[/size]
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by 190: 2:06am On Mar 30, 2011
[size=3pt]wait till i finish ure not seein notinangry angry[/size]
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Sicherheit(m): 2:15am On Mar 30, 2011
@190
If you want to pass a message to MzDarkSkin, send her an email and stop toturing us with your pink font. angry angry


@ MZDarkSkin
Well done for not letting his childish flirting with other girls get to you.
YOU GO GIRL! cool
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by 190: 2:18am On Mar 30, 2011
^^ May your father mistaken hit your mother with a pestle angry angry
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Nobody: 2:20am On Mar 30, 2011
sorry pc guru doesn't support jealously am that awesome.
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Sicherheit(m): 2:46am On Mar 30, 2011
190:

^^ May your father mistaken hit your mother with a pestle angry angry
MistakenLY. It's MISTAKENLY.
Go and learn how to spell jo. angry
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Babypinkyz(f): 1:22pm On Mar 30, 2011
190:

^^ May your father mistaken hit your mother with a pestle angry angry
English at itz peak,besides ur CTRL+V write up is damn 2 long
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Nobody: 1:24pm On Mar 30, 2011
Hehe wonder shall never end ni!  cheesy cheesy cheesy

190 Preaching bout Love, love ke! levels lust go where??  embarassed tongue undecided
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by 190: 1:45pm On Mar 30, 2011
Babypinkyz:

English at itz peak,besides your CTRL+V write up is damn 2 long

miss wor-wor i force u read!! angry angry
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Babypinkyz(f): 1:56pm On Mar 30, 2011
190:

miss wor-wor i force u read!! angry angry
hehe uglymuniduchen sapäõ
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by 190: 2:13pm On Mar 30, 2011
grin grin grin U havent even seen me before
Re: If You Are Not Jealous You Are Not In Love by Babypinkyz(f): 2:24pm On Mar 30, 2011
190:

grin  grin  grin U havent even seen me before
And so? I hav a feeling your a dark midget kinda.

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