One thing I have failed in is maintaining relationships. It's not just relationships with women but with everyone.


I could be deemed an extrovert at times but intrinsically I am a very private person.


I could stay indoors for a week without seeing anyone. I even hate taking calls.


What people see as fun looks like gibberish to me.


I have been to clubs, birthdays, weddings etc yet they don't make sense to me.


Celebrities or artistes don't freak me. If any Nigerian celeb visits my street for instance, I won't even leave my room.

Only intelligent people turn me on at times.

I haven't posted anything on my Facebook wall in 5 years.

I used just one profile pic on WhatsApp for 3 years. Just one.

I am a loner and this has reduced my connections and contacts.

I can meet people including girls and take their contacts but that's where it ends.

I wouldn't call, chat or sms them.


Do you know that even xmas wishes annoy me subtly.


I just want to be in my cocoon. I don't know how to mingle.

In my compound now, there are about 8 tenants with families, yet I don't have anybody's contact. I hate all these greetings, " how una dey? Family nko? Well done oo. "

I DON'T WANT to continue this way next year.

I need help now.
How do I keep in touch with people?

Hi

He

[quote author=Lagosinter1 post=97432949]One thing I have failed in is maintaining relationships. It's not just relationships with women but with everyone.


I could be deemed an extrovert at times but intrinsically I am a very private person.


I could stay indoors for a week without seeing anyone. I even hate taking calls.


What people see as fun looks like gibberish to me.


I have been to clubs, birthdays, weddings etc yet they don't make sense to me.


Celebrities or artistes don't freak me. If any Nigerian celeb visits my street for instance, I won't even leave my room.

Only intelligent people turn me on at times.

I haven't posted anything on my Facebook wall in 5 years.

I used just one profile pic on WhatsApp for 3 years. Just one.

I am a loner and this has reduced my connections and contacts.

I can meet people including girls and take their contacts but that's where it ends.

I wouldn't call, chat or sms them.


Do you know that even xmas wishes annoy me subtly.


I just want to be in my cocoon. I don't know how to mingle.

In my compound now, there are about 8 tenants with families, yet I don't have anybody's contact. I hate all these greetings, " how una dey? Family nko? Well done oo. "

I DON'T WANT to continue this way next year.

I need help now.
How do I keep in touch with people? [/quote


oga change your mindset,your ways and free your self ..
in a nutshell you are the problem of your self u gat no prob.

Mynd44

Lalasticlala

Please help me get suggestions

Dear Op,
You'll have to ask yourself some questions..."Are you happy with the way you are?"

If you are not, because your happiness is all that matters then you have to take steps (even though it might be hard) to get closer to people, to try to enjoy relationships.

Our personalities are almost on the same spectrum but I've made it a point of duty to always check up on friends, to just go out and enjoy myself.

Sometimes, I feel really lazy replying chats or taking calls but I summon up the strength to do so and find out in the end that I'm happier whenever I do so.

For starters, get interested in the people close to you, make small talk and see where it goes.

You can also decide to make at least 3 calls to 3 different people daily, you'll begin to enjoy it and friends will feel obliged to check up on you too.

Lastly, know that you're the key to your potentials, everyone's always about what's in it for them, develop yourself and you'd be the connection other people would want to have.

Happy New year.

I also get bored by all the fake pleasantries and niceties that comes with everyday life.

but then humans are very keen on social class and status. And socializing is as important as feeding hence the need for language.

Having a great communication skill is vital in life.
and It's a good thing you are focusing on improving that area of your life.

The funny thing about being a sociable person is that you don't even have to talk much. All you gotta do is probe the other person to do the bulk of the talking while u do the listening.

One of the key steps to being a better communicator is to start the conversation with an honest genuine smile and ask a simple question like "so how was your day?"

then pay intense attention and give vocal affirmations like "hmm" "are you serious" "tell me more" "yes" or a slight frequent nod of the head during the convo.

You also gotta try as much as possible to play along with the daily interactions and accept it as a part of life. Hating it won't change it.

Another hack is to hang around girls a lot. they will imbibe in you the spirit of talkativeness
You won't even have to try after 3 months of doing this.

Another sure way is to be the first person to compliment people. Search for anything at all in the person's dressing or behavior that I genuinely like and pay a compliment to that.

Also learn to compliment strangers. Like, "hmm what's the name of that lovely fragrance you're wearing?"

and watch them talk . remember to prove them on with other little yet effective nudges to keep the convo going on for a little longer.

Like, "do you have a picture of the perfume? I'd love to see it"
.
PS: like every skill it takes time to be perfect in. just give it time and smile before talking to people

Virgo01:
Dear Op,
You'll have to ask yourself some questions..."Are you happy with the way you are?"

If you are not, because your happiness is all that matters then you have to take steps (even though it might be hard) to get closer to people, to try to enjoy relationships.

Our personalities are almost on the same spectrum but I've made it a point of duty to always check up on friends, to just go out and enjoy myself.

Sometimes, I feel really lazy replying chats or taking calls but I summon up the strength to do so and find out in the end that I'm happier whenever I do so.

For starters, get interested in the people close to you, make small talk and see where it goes.

You can also decide to make at least 3 calls to 3 different people daily, you'll begin to enjoy it and friends will feel obliged to check up on you too.

Lastly, know that you're the key to your potentials, everyone's always about what's in it for them, develop yourself and you'd be the connection other people would want to have.

Happy New year.

Thanks.