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Some Damaging Words My Wife Said During A Quarrel - Family (15) - Nairaland

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Re: Some Damaging Words My Wife Said During A Quarrel by UjuJoan2: 6:41pm On Jan 13, 2021
CrescentMoon:
Let me first tell you my kind of character. For you to make me angry, you have to repeat an offense more than 30 to 40 times. After each offence, I would only give you facial expression that will let you know that you offended me. And I would ensure you get the message.

So wife kept repeating same offence. I told her I don't like what she was doing. She said she would adjust, but kept repeating the same thing. When I got fed up, I tried to retaliate. My only retaliation is that I stopped being around in the house. I would leave the house very early in the morning and return late at night. I would go for business in another town and return 4 days later. She knows nothing stops me from coming home everyday from the other town because I have means of transportation. She flared up. Started calling relatives that I'm maltreating her. They asked her to say which ways I have been maltreating her...she said I'm avoiding our home. Relatives asked if I'm beating or starving her. She said no.

I know why it pained her very well. If she wants to go and urinate outside, I would go and drop her there. When she is through, she would call me and I would go and pick her up again.

She's a woman that's always settling fights for couples in the street. So, she never wanted it to be heard anywhere that we are quarelling in our home. She won't want anybody to come to our house to settle disputes. So this prolongs our fights always.

When she couldn't bear it again, she sent a message to me that goes like this: I INITIALLY DIDN'T WANT TO DIVORCE YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR DISABILITY AS I PITY YOU. BUT NOW, IT'S OVER. YOU HAVE TO BEAR THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR ACTIONS TOWARDS ME ALL THESE YEARS. WHAT DID I HAVE TO DO WITH A JUJU DIABOLIC MAN IN THE FIRST INSTANCE.

Let me disect those words in capital letters for you. I have a disability, but you can't notice it easily until you start talking to me. She said I have to bear the consequences of my actions towards her... looking back, I have done unimaginable things to make her happy. I even saved her life when she didn't want blood transfusion from unknown persons as a result of her Christian belief not to contract demons from the blood of unknown person. Fortunately, my blood group is that of a universal donor. That means I can donate blood for anybody. Note that she had never done any noteworthy thing for me apart from giving birth to our babies. About being a juju man, I will tell you how she arrived at this: somebody was about to give birth from her family side and the baby was in breech position. She asked for advice and I told her that if I take the woman to the village my uncle will give the woman a concoction to reverse it. Her faith is against it, but because someone from her side just gave birth through CS, which almost led to the death of mother and baby, she asked me to take the woman to the village. The breech position was reversed. I'm surprised she now labelled me a juju man.

Instead of me to take her message personal, I urged her to please herself. This infuriated her the more. Instead of leaving me, she invited someone to intervene, tracked me to the second town, and it was settled there.

My problem now is that those words are still ringing in my head... someone I thought was a lover said she married me out of piety.

People donate blood to strangers. You gave your wife blood and think you did something big? What would happen if you gave her a kidney? People do that you know!!

You think leaving her all alone to deal with the frustration of raising the kids alone, chores and most of all loneliness is small? Did you go on your time out with the kids?

What you don’t understand is that it’s not that you left that is annoying, it’s the fact that she can’t. So she gets stuck dealing with the kids you made her have, while you are out there relaxing and having fun!!!

About the disability, it’s not like you are blind or lame. Why should her statement even bother you? It was clearly spoken in anger and completely irrelevant. So you think you can hurt her and she won’t retaliate in a way that hurts you too?

I’m not justifying why your wife did, but you also need to understand how you pushed her to act that way. I know Nairaland men will make you feel your wife is evil, but think about it, is she really?

If you can’t take the heat, don’t stay in the kitchen. You started it, and now you are crying foul.

People will do things you don’t like, what you need to ask yourself is if she is doing it to hurt you, or if she just can’t help herself. You need to accept whatever it is she does that annoys you, because I know you must do somethings that annoy her too. She’s not a child that you will punish because she was naughty. She’s your wife For God’s sake!!!

1 Like

Re: Some Damaging Words My Wife Said During A Quarrel by UjuJoan2: 6:45pm On Jan 13, 2021
CrescentMoon:


These sentences are my way of saying that I spoiled her with care to the extent that I drive her to wherever she wants to go instead of leaving her to catch public transport.

Ahhh, I give up. You think driving your wife is a Favour? Your mates are buying their wives luxury cars and you are here boasting that you drive her.

Those women whose husband buy them cars and hire them Drivers do they have two heads?

Instead of you to be humble you are still making mouth. I pity that wife of yours!
Re: Some Damaging Words My Wife Said During A Quarrel by foyeks2001(f): 7:46pm On Jan 13, 2021
tarantino1:


You're my kind of person. grin


Yes o grin grin grin
Re: Some Damaging Words My Wife Said During A Quarrel by Teleprompter(f): 12:27am On Jan 19, 2021
[ Game theory !!

Except I'm rare cases where the woman is extremely manipulative, it is not rocked science to turn her excesses into moderation.

A man is enabling a woman when her survival depends on you and yet she always had her way. Some things are just wrong and even a bad person must admit it publicly even if his heart is okay with it. The words that woman wrote would be condemned by even her own friends and family except je is their puppet. If ha is also in the habit of using harsh words, the woman can get even without responding the same way. Even silence would work better.
If she leaves him for a man without disability and he welcomes her it is because he is too stupid to fun out the real reason why her first marriage ended or he is just an indisciplined man himself. Both ways, everyone would get what's coming to them.

quote author=Joshmuch post=97951919]You are blessed. Kindly elaborate on how we enable them, so that we can disable them[/quote]
Re: Some Damaging Words My Wife Said During A Quarrel by AlphaSoul: 5:31am On Feb 05, 2021
CrescentMoon:
Let me first tell you my kind of character. For you to make me angry, you have to repeat an offense more than 30 to 40 times. After each offence, I would only give you facial expression that will let you know that you offended me. And I would ensure you get the message.

So wife kept repeating same offence. I told her I don't like what she was doing. She said she would adjust, but kept repeating the same thing. When I got fed up, I tried to retaliate. My only retaliation is that I stopped being around in the house. I would leave the house very early in the morning and return late at night. I would go for business in another town and return 4 days later. She knows nothing stops me from coming home everyday from the other town because I have means of transportation. She flared up. Started calling relatives that I'm maltreating her. They asked her to say which ways I have been maltreating her...she said I'm avoiding our home. Relatives asked if I'm beating or starving her. She said no.

I know why it pained her very well. If she wants to go and urinate outside, I would go and drop her there. When she is through, she would call me and I would go and pick her up again.

She's a woman that's always settling fights for couples in the street. So, she never wanted it to be heard anywhere that we are quarelling in our home. She won't want anybody to come to our house to settle disputes. So this prolongs our fights always.

When she couldn't bear it again, she sent a message to me that goes like this: I INITIALLY DIDN'T WANT TO DIVORCE YOU BECAUSE OF YOUR DISABILITY AS I PITY YOU. BUT NOW, IT'S OVER. YOU HAVE TO BEAR THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR ACTIONS TOWARDS ME ALL THESE YEARS. WHAT DID I HAVE TO DO WITH A JUJU DIABOLIC MAN IN THE FIRST INSTANCE.

Let me disect those words in capital letters for you. I have a disability, but you can't notice it easily until you start talking to me. She said I have to bear the consequences of my actions towards her... looking back, I have done unimaginable things to make her happy. I even saved her life when she didn't want blood transfusion from unknown persons as a result of her Christian belief not to contract demons from the blood of unknown person. Fortunately, my blood group is that of a universal donor. That means I can donate blood for anybody. Note that she had never done any noteworthy thing for me apart from giving birth to our babies. About being a juju man, I will tell you how she arrived at this: somebody was about to give birth from her family side and the baby was in breech position. She asked for advice and I told her that if I take the woman to the village my uncle will give the woman a concoction to reverse it. Her faith is against it, but because someone from her side just gave birth through CS, which almost led to the death of mother and baby, she asked me to take the woman to the village. The breech position was reversed. I'm surprised she now labelled me a juju man.

Instead of me to take her message personal, I urged her to please herself. This infuriated her the more. Instead of leaving me, she invited someone to intervene, tracked me to the second town, and it was settled there.

My problem now is that those words are still ringing in my head... someone I thought was a lover said she married me out of piety.
She has to genuinely apologise
verbally and in writing... or she
leaves the house for you and the
kids.
Re: Some Damaging Words My Wife Said During A Quarrel by iamL(f): 8:49am On Feb 05, 2021
You gave your wife blood and think you did something big? ordinary blood! What abt people that donate kidney to people they don't know?

She didn't add anything to your life except birthing? na wah o!
You think leaving her all alone to deal with the frustration of raising the kids alone, chores and most of all loneliness is small while u are busy
flexing oustide in the name of work? Did you go on your time out with the kids?

Am not in support of your wife actions but u failed to put yourself in her shoes and u are been blind to what is passing through in her marriage with you.

She has apologized so I see no reason to hold on to that else you will end up hurting yourself. If she doesn't want u anymore trust me she would have long gone after u ran away.

(NB: No responsible man will run away from home leaving his children behind in the name of punishing his wife. Some women they try shall.
Re: Some Damaging Words My Wife Said During A Quarrel by Owen247: 5:41pm On Jan 21, 2022
abimbola74:

Aswear she didn’t mean those words . Women and their mouth like tap water. She just want to hurt you with words and let you feel miserable. Show her this text and tell her you won’t delete that message that it reminds you who she really is and watch how she will cry uncontrollably. Bruh abeg no vex
She jxt wan use am hurt op make em use vex come bak home.to me i think it isnt 4rm her heart.

1 Like

Re: Some Damaging Words My Wife Said During A Quarrel by abimbola74(m): 7:45pm On Jan 21, 2022
Owen247:
She jxt wan use am hurt op make em use vex come bak home.to me i think it isnt 4rm her heart.
Exactly bruh, women too Dey run mouth all in d name of cheap points
Re: Some Damaging Words My Wife Said During A Quarrel by Owen247: 10:56pm On Jan 21, 2022
abimbola74:

Exactly bruh, women too Dey run mouth all in d name of cheap points
Aswear

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