work and make your own money o, this world is upside down.....what in God's name is marriage now? all man to himself, or let him sweat it out, at least he's the man?

I believe doing what makes u happy is the best. As for me, staying at home as a full time housewife is out of the option. While family biz is also not my dream. I have loved and will always love BEYONCE for her song INDEPENDENT WOMAN ! nothing can be compared to that. We can handle the house chores together. For crying out loud,It'sn't a crime being a woman..is it ?

nobody says it is, infact its a priviledge

Thank goodness it's a privilege.somepple talk as if once u'r a woman.u can't be what u like to be, except being a wife to someone and mother to kids.it's nice but u can be something else as well...like a bread winner in your family

you are primarily a wife, secondly a mother and lastly everything else you wish to be, you can be___as long as you dont forget that either.

I'm a wife thats right coz i'm the female partner, a mother cuz i have kids (not forgetting they've got a father too) and thet don't have to be rated as pry or sec.......and my career doesn't have to take a backseat. All goes along well. We are 2 in the show anyway (Equal 2 with equal responsibility)

Of course it has to be rated as 1 or 2, otherwise the purpose of marriage is defeated, and no the rating does not relegate your career to the backseat, i wouldnt want a non working wife too.....it just helps to prioritize

The priority should be universal..i mean both partners should do the priotising. A stay at home dad isn't a bad idea, is it ? so both could priotize who babysits and who works. Cuz both parents shdn't be busy in the interest of their kids

Working woman = Independent woman = HAPPY WOMAN !!!

I'm definately gon have my own job and make my own money when i get married.

This might seem like a topic for the guys but please ladies your contributions are not only welcome but valued

If money wasn't an issue-assuming you as a guy earns enough to take care of your family- will you prefer to have a wife that goes to a normal corporate job,9-5 as we would say in Britain,or would you rather  have your wife stay at home and take care of the kids and the home ?

For me,the picture ain't clear yet. I have a good job,enough to take care of any family I wish to raise and would love any woman I marry to have enough time to cater for the home but when I see the cute,sharp,smart, sophisticated and professional woman  I would wish her to be like them.Confusion,right ? 

I also think letting a lady do something professional not only keeps her from being bored but also keeps her abreast of global  events and pretty independent but unfortunatley,it might make her unavailable for her traditional wifely/motherly roles.Sorry ladies,I am still an African man at heart 

Maybe the middle ground will be for her to do a not too demanding job like teaching, or run her own businees.

Lets hear from the Naira Landers

funloving:

or run her own business.

The best answer is embedded in your lengthy post. That is it!

IAH:

The best answer is embedded in your lengthy post. That is it!

Or let her do whatever she wants as long as she handles her responsibilities of being a housewife.

Women are not made for working. As controversial as that may sound, it is the glaring truth. Ask any sensible woman with a LENGTHY working career. Who really wants to get up daily and hustle to no end (believe me you will), when you can simply post up and be pampered silly by a strong man by maintaining his home, attending to his needs and catering for his seed.

All those screaming independent I am sure have not yet maintained that 'independent' lifestyle they so desire for 5+ years. Experience is the best teacher

@yangie i'm one sensible lady and i do want to have my own job. u think going to skool is so fun we just couldn't think of anything better to do? i know i'm not gon spend more dan 4yrs slaving in college to get good grades and meet deadlines just to get out of it to become a housewife.
we r not made for working? where did u get dat from if i may ask?
so how cum u guys wanna hustle to no end when u can take it easy if money s coming from the woman too?

I really dont understand your last question so I will let that slide. However Im all woman and I had a clause with the sensible woman condition "with a LENGTHY working career" do you fit the bill? You are in the usa, take yourself on that journey through the corporate jungle and come back to tell us how satisfying, fulfilling and exciting it really is. No one said you shouldn't work. Its your life, knock yourself out. Every situation is give or take but most are nothing without the adherence to a higher power. Simply put, man proposes God disposes.

my last question was asking why do guys make unneccassary stress for themselves by wanting to do all d work when the woman is capable of sharing part of the loads with him?
i haven't gone through all d stress but my mom has and she ain't complaining. but i know it's satisfying and fulfilling to know u are earning your own money with ur own sweat and hardwork.

The truth of the matter is: Everywoman wants to be known as somebody else apart from "Junior's mum or Seun's wife" we also want to be known as Tola's Manager or Kunle's year 4 music teacher, oluwadara's mentor, etc

I think men should release their wives to do what will give them some sort of fulfillment, apart from being at home and making babies.

I agree with you, and even the bible does not subscribe to a woman not working................it only advocates the woman realise she is subject to the man........dont get me wrong, subject not slave.

It's my choice cuz it's ma life. And i'll like to live it just the way i like that pleases God and satisfies me. Anyone that wants to be an housewife can go ahead and be, but for me, i'm certainly not gonna be one. Can never feel fulfiled being one. For chrissakes, i got a whole lotta goals and ambitions. My dreams and aspirations go to cleaning houses and cooking and probably making babies ? Sure not.....but for those who's dream it is can as well enjoy themselves as housewifes.

i doubt women are chained in their homes unable to go do things nowdays. If you see someone at home, that is probably where she wants to be.

i would defintely be a working woman but a total wife to my husband and the best mother i can be to both him and the children

I have and am still living the Independent Woman life in Lagos and I must say, house wife wins hands down....and I am not too sure that being a house wife is easier than working. However because of my independent streak, I'll be running my own business. That will also give me the flexibility I need to cater to my husband and children's needs...I am a bit conservative, you see..Of course, my husband will be picking up all my bills (men need to feel like men ) and whatever I make, I decide what I want to do with it.

Yangie, you got it right the first time, I think. I do not like the thought of not being able to go to my children's interhouse sports day because I have an urgent meeting...Why on earth did I have them then??

I think most women want to be good wives and mothers without giving up their individuality. How possible that is, I am not sure but we will see...Ladies, if this is the case, then as hard as it may probably be, I think there is a compromise for your situation. You just need to look a little harder for it.

Oh bless your days! Glad to hear someone who has walked the walk. So have I and honestly, I used to be Queen of Independence if I say so myself. I am still managing my own affairs, business, school and all but was briefly well taken care of and sought after by an influential man, 'independent streak' reared its ugly head and I pushed him away. Suffice to say its much more fulfilling enjoying his treats than any of equal value I have on my own. I rather be his housewife any day than one business woman abegi, its not like you will housewife to someone who does not have the means to do so. Shine eye

allonym:

i doubt women are chained in their homes unable to go do things nowdays. If you see someone at home, that is probably where she wants to be.

Well said, it's your choice and my choice. I don't want to be mrs b and i wanna be myself, if it suits you to stick your butt at home well it's fine but me, can't see myself sitting at home, tho it's as much work or even more but i prefer having a career, something different from home work. It will be pretty stressful and difficult but thats the trick, i love it like that.

abeg, even if there r heaven and earth in dat house , shoo i go still work cuz being idol is not ma thing and afterall, why would I spend all diz money 4 uni. and den decides 2 be a house wife..in diz century we r in 2......abeg, i will like 2 go and socilazie (9-5 shift) and see and know wud up is happening in da world and 4 men :P2 know i dey cuz if u stay at home, u r likely 2 be hearing stories 4rom ur hubby about being in one meeting or da other but when u work urself and meet ppl of ur caliber, den da game is uppppppp.........house wife ain't acceptable if not i would have told ma dad i would stay home and no uni. and den siddon 4 house and wait 4 a wealthy man 2 come and marry me and den house wife won't be a debate...hahahhahaa...SOCILIAIZATION is a process of learning..even ma PHD holder dad sayz da same...happy new year ppl

definentely gotta be a working woman. my aunt is a housewive though and she love it.

Being a working class woman or having a career is not all that bad, but i think the larger part of a woman's time should be devoted to her family(husband & children) if a married woman is to work, she should be self employed at least this would afford her enough time to take proper care of her family..her children in particular cos' they're most vulnerable so they need attention, but a situation whereby the woman's goes to work from morn' till eve' leaving the kid's for the house help or whoever u find out that these children turn to something else...it's not as if she can't attend to her business when she's self employed...but at least she's a boss of her own therefore she can close and go home anytime she pleases or she might even decide to employ someone who can take charge when she's not there. Some women due to their tight schedule do not even have time to prepare meal's for their hushand or even to wash his cloth's, they live everything for the househelp to do..now this is what i call absolute RUBBISH! how can a househelp prepare ur husband's meal for christ's sake? what did he marry u for then? a woman is suppose to have time for her home...she ought to know what's happening in the home and all that...i don't even fansy the idea of getting a househelp cos' they're not to be trusted...(if u get the one that'll snatch ur husby or even spoil ur children whose fault will it be?) and it happen's cos' if ur husby don't get enough attention from u but get's it from the househelp, what do u expect? Well, as for me...i'm gonna be self employed when i get married so my husband & children can enjoy enough of my attention and i ain't gonna get any househelp i'll do all the chore's myself.

Much as I love being a working class woman,if my work is telling on my marriage,I will give it up without thinking twice so that I will not lose my home.Whats the essence having a good job with no one to enjoy it with?Thats why I always advice young ladies to start investing their money from their teens,not spend it on trivialties...I am rich enough to leave my work and become a full time housewife cos I started buying shares and bonds right from when I was a gawky teenager.I don't want my children to suffer what I suffered.

I am a working woman and will always strive to work hard to support my family.U know what, idleness is a disease.

being a housewife doesn't mean you will be idle.There are a 1001 things to do while at home...it's all about being creative...