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Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? - Family - Nairaland

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Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 7:01am On May 20
All around me, I see eligible decent folks that are single and ready to mingle, you'll find them going on dates, talking to someone, are on dating networks and more but somehow, they are single and have been so for a long time.

What is the cause? Are young people gradually loosing compatibility with each other? Opinions are highly welcome.

1 Like

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Usefulusman(m): 7:04am On May 20
YOU CAN GOOGLE IT OR GO AND ASK IFA. SIMPLE ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTIONYOU CAN GOOGLE IT OR GO AND ASK IFA. SIMPLE ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTIONYOU CAN GOOGLE IT OR GO AND ASK IFA. SIMPLE ANSWER TO YOUR QUESTION

2 Likes

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Ahmed0336(m): 7:37am On May 20
Decent without money to 98% of 9ja girls is like baking bread without flour.

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by VeeVeeMyLuv(m): 7:39am On May 20
Single where? From which part of the country? Educational background? Please do the demographic statistics and come up with verifiable stats and figures.

Don't just make blanket statements.

6 Likes

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Richy4(m): 7:45am On May 20
How do one even define/ qualify the word decent ... Outward Appearance ?... Character/ behavioral wise?... Financial wise?....We will have to double check

1 Like

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Vyzz: 7:46am On May 20
Even people wey dey in relationship today dey Single

5 Likes

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 7:54am On May 20
Richy4:
How do one even define/ qualify the word decent ... Outward Appearance ?... Character/ behavioral wise?... Financial wise?....We will have to double check

It's inclusive of all. Outward appearance would be looking like someone that takes good care of his/her self, character wise would be having a healthy sense of morals, and of course one should have something going on money wise, for self-sufficiency.

This should be reasonably enough to qualify someone as being devent enough.
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by VeeVeeMyLuv(m): 7:56am On May 20
To answer your question,

It is bcoz almost everything about the country is severely disjointed and catastrophic disaster.

Imagine your country's economy being driven with the kynesian economic model. See 40% unemployment rate.

Okay even to go to the farm in the villages in absence of gainful employment is a serious battle and in some cases nearly impossible due to high level of insecurity that has never been witnessed before.

Now Yahoo boys, drug dealers, ritual killers, thugs, terrorists, kidnappers, prostitute have joined the eligible list for marriage.

Nowadays if you bring honest hard working civil servant and a Yahoo boy before a girl/young lady/young woman she will most likely pick the Yahoo boy. That is the level to which our society have somersaulted.

10 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 8:00am On May 20
Ahmed0336:
Decent without money to 98% of 9ja girls is like baking bread without floor.

Oh, you want her to operate out of her natural programming? grin

1 Like

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by bukatyne(f): 8:00am On May 20
Decent single man/woman does not translate to decent in relationships.

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Jeon(m): 8:05am On May 20
roteblomen:
All around me, I see eligible decent folks that are single and ready to mingle, you'll find them going on dates, talking to someone, are on dating networks and more but somehow, they are single and have been so for a long time.

What is the cause? Are young people gradually loosing compatibility with each other? Opinions are highly welcome.

Because the decent folks don't wanna mess up their name in the name of relationship.


IN NIGERIA WE DON'T DATE FOR LOVE, THEY DATE FOR SEX AND LUST



Lollittaa my lollipopcorn

Good morning sweetie chinny

1 Like

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 8:10am On May 20
bukatyne:
Decent single man/woman does not translate to decent in relationships.

Do you mean that despite their decency, they are not good enough to be in a relationship? If so, then how about non-decent folks that marries all the time?
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by bukatyne(f): 8:12am On May 20
roteblomen:


Do you mean that despite their decency, they are not good enough to be in a relationship? If so, then how about non-decent folks that marries all the time?

What's your definition of decency?

Are you focused on the act of getting hitched or the quality of the marriage/relationship?

4 Likes

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 8:14am On May 20
VeeVeeMyLuv:
To answer your question,

It is bcoz almost everything about the country is severely disjointed and catastrophic disaster.

Imagine your country's economy being driven with the kynesian economic model. See 40% unemployment rate.

Okay even to go to the farm in the villages in absence of gainful employment is a serious battle and in some cases nearly impossible due to high level of insecurity that has never been witnessed before.

Now Yahoo boys, drug dealers, ritual killers, thugs, terrorists, kidnappers, prostitute have joined the eligible list for marriage.

Nowadays if you bring honest hard working civil servant and a Yahoo boy before a girl/young lady/young woman she will most likely pick the Yahoo boy. That is the level to which our society have somersaulted.

In the midst of all what you wrote, there are still subsets of decent folks around. I'm referring to that group.
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 8:32am On May 20
bukatyne:


What's your definition of decency?

Are you focused on the act of getting hitched or the quality of the marriage/relationship?

None of the above.

By decency, I'm referring to the qualitative elements that sophisticates the individual. Such as, but not limited to the person's value system, physical attributes, financial independence, and background.

That's my definition of decency. So having clarify the above, it is not uncommon to come across such folks being in the romance marketplace for long, without complimentary partners to engage with.
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Barbiturate(m): 8:35am On May 20
No money to marry!
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by angelfallz(m): 9:22am On May 20
Well said
bukatyne:
Decent single man/woman does not translate to decent in relationships.
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Klass99(f): 1:26pm On May 20
roteblomen:


What is the cause? Are young people gradually loosing compatibility with each other? Opinions are highly welcome.

You have answered a part of your question. It is a compatibility issue in some instances, for example why the hell would you want to get hitched or attached to someone who;

1. Is a messy and untidy individual
2. Has a poor attitude to bills, as in, they can owe for Africa when it’s time to pay bills like electricity, service charge etc
3. Is unreliable and rarely follows through on what they said they would do and………
4. Has a host of other issues.

On another hand, some singles value their independence, the freedom and peace of mind that comes with it and they genuinely struggle with giving it up.

It is not freedom to fuucck around or sample different diicks like fools often assume, but it is the freedom to create your daily life routine the way you want it, the freedom to pursue goals unencumbered like a Masters or Ph.D, freedom to take crazy risks with your career/work life and other risks worth taking, without hesitation or a second thought - just to test your capabilities and see where it all leads to.

The peace of mind which comes from not having to deal with troublesome in-laws. Peace of mind from not worrying about kids when they’ve gone off to boarding school and peace of mind from not worrying about what hubby or wifey is doing behind your back, when your instincts keep screaming, I can’t trust this person.

Let me try and explain this further;

1. Aisha for instance has lived on her own for 8 years or more, works a good job, is able to pay her bills without drama, is used to a daily routine she cherishes and dreads having that routine up ended by others.

2. It’s a simple routine of when she wakes up, she has her quiet time/bible study, does her affirmations, works-out, showers and hits the road for work. She can sleep in, on weekends and wake up when she feels like, can choose to cook or not cook, have her girl-friends over for a weekend stay etc.

3. Aisha also has a warm/caring family and a wonderful circle of friends in her life, she feels blessed, content and pleased with life. She is not in a hurry to give up a life she is reasonably happy with for the unknown.

3 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 3:31pm On May 20
It's very simple.

It's because they can't find someone who's equally decent like them. Incompatibility.

So the indecent ones see themselves and click easily and they seem to be more than the decent ones hence the higher chances they have getting married more frequently than the decent who seem to be more reserved.

So many bad energies in relationships and marriages today as a result of the type of people rushing into it for the wrong reasons.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by maryini(f): 7:34pm On May 20
I think it’s a mix of risk aversiveness and pride.
Folks are not be willing to put themselves out there anymore. They are also lazy about it.

As humans as soon as we meet basic needs of food, clothing, shelter we get lazy about going out of the way to seek marriage.

4 Likes

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by damesilver(m): 8:05pm On May 20
“Those who come closer to the truth may at first have to feel lonely which does not make them unhappy but brings great peace” Abdrushin.

The decent, as so called, don’t want to be seen as soliciting for a relationship. More openness and humility will go a long way. If they still lack these two virtues then their acclaimed decency is in question. They will only be decent in hypocrisy.

If you are truly decent and willing to meet a likeminded friend, let’s meet.

1 Like

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by RightToReject(m): 9:19pm On May 20
Wannabe decent people, I wager. One can never be decent and lack quality choices and options to choose from (and vice versa), except where the choice to stay single is deliberate or unordinary, which is usually rare. It doesn't matter whether one is an extrovert or introvert.

Every wannabe kind and libertarian man will always convinced himself that he's decent, just as every wannabe reasonable woman will convinced herself that she's decent.

1 Like

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by 1F30M4(f): 9:59pm On May 20
Hmmmm I'd say it's something about individual standards.. One may be decent enough but it doesn't really work that way.
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by merieam16(f): 10:58pm On May 20
Ahmed0336:
Decent without money to 98% of 9ja girls is like baking bread without floor.
flour
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 2:02am On May 21
RightToReject:
Wannabe decent people, I wager. One can never be decent and lack quality choices and options to choose from (and vice versa), except where the choice to stay single is deliberate or unordinary, which is usually rare. It doesn't matter whether one is an extrovert or introvert.

Every wannabe kind and libertarian man will always convinced himself that he's decent, just as every wannabe reasonable woman will convinced herself that she's decent.

Is being decent enough? Can decency stand-alone without financial sufficiency, especially for men? conversely, do you think it has any effect on why lots of eligible young adults are single?

1 Like

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 2:12am On May 21
maryini:
I think it’s a mix of risk aversiveness and pride.
Folks are not be willing to put themselves out there anymore. They are also lazy about it.

As humans as soon as we meet basic needs of food, clothing, shelter we get lazy about going out of the way to seek marriage.

Very true, this is a perspective I can agree with. Relationships from time immemorial have always served as a functional union, unlike now that it is approached from a complementary perspective. Having said that, does it suffice to say that intimates relationships, especially marriage are gradually becoming outdated? What do you think?
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 2:15am On May 21
damesilver:
“Those who come closer to the truth may at first have to feel lonely which does not make them unhappy but brings great peace” Abdrushin.

The decent, as so called, don’t want to be seen as soliciting for a relationship. More openness and humility will go a long way. If they still lack these two virtues then their acclaimed decency is in question. They will only be decent in hypocrisy.

If you are truly decent and willing to meet a likeminded friend, let’s meet.

In order words, it is their fault for being single and not due to some societal factors? isn't that a narrow way to look at it?
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Nobody: 2:17am On May 21
1F30M4:
Hmmmm I'd say it's something about individual standards.. One may be decent enough but it doesn't really work that way.

It calls to question when no one out there can meet an individual's standards, don't you think so? still, does it suffice to call such people decent?
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by cococandy(f): 4:25am On May 21
Well said
Klass99:


You have answered a part of your question. It is a compatibility issue in some instances, for example why the hell would you want to get hitched or attached to someone who;

1. Is a messy and untidy individual
2. Has a poor attitude to bills, as in, they can owe for Africa when it’s time to pay bills like electricity, service charge etc
3. Is unreliable and rarely follows through on what they said they would do and………
4. Has a host of other issues.

On another hand, some singles value their independence, the freedom and peace of mind that comes with it and they genuinely struggle with giving it up.

It is not freedom to fuucck around or sample different diicks like fools often assume, but it is the freedom to create your daily life routine the way you want it, the freedom to pursue goals unencumbered like a Masters or Ph.D, freedom to take crazy risks with your career/work life and other risks worth taking, without hesitation or a second thought - just to test your capabilities and see where it all leads to.

The peace of mind which comes from not having to deal with troublesome in-laws. Peace of mind from not worrying about kids when they’ve gone off to boarding school and peace of mind from not worrying about what hubby or wifey is doing behind your back, when your instincts keep screaming, I can’t trust this person.

Let me try and explain this further;

1. Aisha for instance has lived on her own for 8 years or more, works a good job, is able to pay her bills without drama, is used to a daily routine she cherishes and dreads having that routine up ended by others.

2. It’s a simple routine of when she wakes up, she has her quiet time/bible study, does her affirmations, works-out, showers and hits the road for work. She can sleep in, on weekends and wake up when she feels like, can choose to cook or not cook, have her girl-friends over for a weekend stay etc.

3. Aisha also has a warm/caring family and a wonderful circle of friends in her life, she feels blessed, content and pleased with life. She is not in a hurry to give up a life she is reasonably happy with for the unknown.



Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Ahmed0336(m): 6:49am On May 21
merieam16:
flour
Corrected. Thanks sweetheart.
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by ImaIma1(f): 7:17am On May 21
VeeVeeMyLuv:
To answer your question,

It is bcoz almost everything about the country is severely disjointed and catastrophic disaster.

Imagine your country's economy being driven with the kynesian economic model. See 40% unemployment rate.

Okay even to go to the farm in the villages in absence of gainful employment is a serious battle and in some cases nearly impossible due to high level of insecurity that has never been witnessed before.

Now Yahoo boys, drug dealers, ritual killers, thugs, terrorists, kidnappers, prostitute have joined the eligible list for marriage.

Nowadays if you bring honest hard working civil servant and a Yahoo boy before a girl/young lady/young woman she will most likely pick the Yahoo boy. That is the level to which our society have somersaulted.


True. And if you put a cleavage exposing big boobs/bumbum girl dressed skimpy and seductively and place side by side with a decent looking simply dressed, covered from head to toe, a lot of guys will go for the boobs.

1 Like

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