Hello guys, I have this small issue bodering me about ladies these days. So please anybody that can advice me weather male or female can help. May be there is something I am not doing right.
I am a single guy in my early 30s looking for a serious and matured lady to start a relationship that will lead to marriage cos I am ready to settle down. The problem I am currently facing is that any time i try to toast a lady she will never tell me yes she have accepted or she love me too, the next thing that will happen is that she will start billing me with unnecessary demands which I will bluntly reject cos I did not even know my stand yet. This happens to me. This is the 5th attempt with in 6 months almost all from desame similar issues. The last one happened this morning from a lady I am disturbing all these while with serious romantic texts and calls full of i love u and other sweet words. The lady have never for once retaliate such gesture to me. Infact anytime I am chatting with her I try to bring love topic she will do as if as she did not see it. All of sudden this morning she sent me her account number that she need money to fix her hair and other stuffs to look beautiful for me on sallah day. This is a girl that I don't even know if we are dating or not.
My confusion now is that, these frequents demands are they a way saying yes that they have agreed or not or they are just testing us to know how serious we are with the love that we pronounced to them.? How can a lady that is feeling shy to even tell you that she loves you back will be comfortable asking you for money. I am very confused right. Is there anybody that can advice on what to do next time. My problem is not that I can't spend and care for woman that I know we are dating,but these girls did not even agree to date me.

I am sure they would have stored your name as "Zuby Maga"...


No be insult oo...

yomi007k:
I am sure they would have stored your name as "Zuby Maga"...


No be insult oo...

They can't do that Cos I am very strict to my policy. I have never ever spend one kobo on any of them. I think that's what frustrate them nd stop talking to me.

its obvious YOU are the problem here... you are so hellbent on finding love and/or a serious relationship that you are missing the most important part of being in a r/ship. stop trying to put the carriage before the horse, and instead try to find A FRIEND 1st and take it from there. also it would be good if you chose carefully the women you approach, as it is obvious they see how desperate you are, and they try to use that to their advantage.

remember: you should never use money to keep women in your life... a woman should accept to date you whether you have money or not, if the sole reason to date you is the money/gifts you offer then this is not a r/ship but a prostitute and her client.

btw, men like you who talk about love (left right center) yet dont know what it means, are the reason why women easily play you. stop talking about love to strangers you barely know.

zuby4real10:

They can't do that Cos I am very strict to my policy. I have never ever spend one kobo on any of them. I think that's what frustrate them nd stop talking to me.

Correct guy...

yomi007k:
I am sure they would have stored your name as "Zuby Maga"...


No be insult oo...

They can't do that Cos I am very strict to my policy. I have never ever spend onthinke kobo on any of them. I that's what frustrate them nd stop talking to me.

If you say you love me then show me. Action speaks

Oga Ade, you are not serious. Do you know the meaning of a date? A date is not talking I love you on phone. It is taking a lady out as in going to Cinema, beach or anywhere that is not your house.

During that date, it is when you will start the story of your life. You will chip in the story of girls asking you for money and that you really don't want that kind of girl. Tell her money is not the issue but you really needs a lady that sees you and not your money.

But Oga, there is no how you won't spend o.

Please I am sorry I forgot to add the fact that I have never ever in my life try to use money or any other material things to woe a girl. So those that might think that I am the one that is giving them the impression that I have money are wrong.

Damn we've all been there before man
Nevertheless I recommend these great coaches for you
Ubunja
Phansophist
Dephycologist
Hazard7
Theundercover

Very great coaches am sure they'll find the answers to ur questions

MrBrownJay1:
its obvious YOU are the problem here... you are so hellbent on finding love and/or a serious relationship that you are missing the most important part of being in a r/ship. stop trying to put the carriage before the horse, and instead try to find A FRIEND 1st and take it from there. also it would be good if you chose carefully the women you approach, as it is obvious they see how desperate you are, and they try to use that to their advantage.

remember: you should never use money to keep women in your life... a woman should accept to date you whether you have money or not, if the sole reason to date you is the money/gifts you offer then this is not a r/ship but a prostitute and her client.

btw, men like you who talk about love (left right center) yet dont know what it means, are the reason why women easily play you. stop talking about love to strangers you barely know.

Thanks so much sir and all ur advices are noted sir. But belive me all these points that you mentioned I have applied them b4 nd they didn't work for me. Like the issue of trying to be friends with them first. The last lady is my best friend in school. She is my course mate, we are doing our masters program together. Having seen her age nd maturity nd how close we are I tried to give her a chance. The moment love issue start all of sudden she started billing me.

Next time,don't act too serious. Take it slow as if u don't care if she end up your babe or not..
Don't start with I want a gal friend...start with going on a date, gisting, talking abt different topics and life issues.. enjoy ursef laugh and catch fun.
Make sure it's a imple date ...don't spend more
than 3k or 5k max in the date...so it won't appear u are throwing money around to impress.
.
Don't chat love love stuff on WhatsApp....normals greetings, checking on you..and random shit .u can. Start convo based on her status. And don't check her status all the time.
.
Don't rush
.
When u call,don't do it often...and check her level of response and interest when she talks on phone
.
. When it's time to invite her to your place...like after two or three date maximum when she's a bit comfortable with u...tell her u will like her to know ur place, then observe her reaction or excuse....it will give u a sign if she's interested at all..
....If she gave too many excuse or fail to show up in 2 or max 3 attempted times u told her...then forget abt her...and don't call or chat her until maybe she contact u.

luvmijeje:
Oga Ade, you are not serious. Do you know the meaning of a date? A date is not talking I love you on phone. It is taking a lady out as in going to Cinema, beach or anywhere that is not your house.

During that date, it is when you will start the story of your life. You will chip in the story of girls asking you for money and that you really don't want that kind of girl. Tell her money is not the issue but you really needs a lady that sees you and not your money.

But Oga, there is no how you won't spend o.

All the 5 ladies I told you I have tried I took all of them to either cinema or restaurants where we gist nd relax b4 telling them my feelings on them. There was one I took to domino pizza where we drank ice cream and pizza of 20k. Only for her to reach house and tell me that she is broke she don't even have food to eat I should send her some token in her account. I tried to let her understand that today is our first date I think it is too early for that. That was the last time she talked to me again. My problem is not giving but y is it that they can't even tell me yes that they have accepted b4 start billing me.

Stupidquestions:
Next time,don't act too serious. Take it slow as if u don't care if she end up your babe or not..
Don't start with I want a gal friend...start with going on a date, gisting, talking abt different topics and life issues.. enjoy ursef laugh and catch fun.
Make sure it's a imple date ...don't spend more
than 3k or 5k max in the date...so it won't appear u are throwing money around to impress.
.
Don't chat love love stuff on WhatsApp....normals greetings, checking on you..and random shit .u can. Start convo based on her status. And don't check her status all the time.
.
Don't rush
.
When u call,don't do it often...and check her level of response and interest when she talks on phone
.
. When it's time to invite her to your place...like after two or three date maximum when she's a bit comfortable with u...tell her u will like her to know ur place, then observe her reaction or excuse....it will give u a sign if she's interested at all..
....If she gave too many excuse or fail to show up in 2 or max 3 attempted times u told her...then forget abt her

OK sir noted. Thanks

Lol. ....

zuby4real10:

All the 5 ladies I told you I have tried I took all of them to either cinema or restaurants where we gist nd relax b4 telling them my feelings on them. There was one I took to domino pizza where we drank ice cream and pizza of 20k. Only for her to reach house and tell me that she is broke she don't even have food to eat I should send her some token in her account. I tried to let her understand that today is our first date I think it is too early for that. That was the last time she talked to me again. My problem is not giving but y is it that they can't even tell me yes that they have accepted b4 start billing me.

Hmmmm! Your issue is just for them to say yes. If any of them say yes, you don't mind them billing you from morning to night.

The solution to your answer is simple.

All of sudden this morning she sent me her account number that she need money to fix her hair and other stuffs to look beautiful for me on sallah day. This is a girl that I don't even know if we are dating or not

Please send her the money. And I'll leave you with this quote. The key to unlocking the world around you is to mask your flaws(Intelligence) And I'll leave you with pearl of wisdom. How do the rich gets to steal the wife of the poor.

My brother, this are not women, not real women anyway, anybody that takes or wants to take advantage of somebody just because they have feelings for them is not a normal human being. DO NOT, I repeat, do not spend a dime of your hard earned money on these people, it won't lead to anything serious, that's not how a relationship, a real one should start or even progress. Giving them money will not guarantee love, if anything, an idiot will think you are a fool for spending on them. Just be patient and wise and trust God, your own person will come along and when you meet her, you will know

The kind of girls we have in Nigeria these days are something else.. No money no love.. So sad!

You have no problem just for you to change your circles and develop a great self confidence with prayers too.

zuby4real10:

All the 5 ladies I told you I have tried I took all of them to either cinema or restaurants where we gist nd relax b4 telling them my feelings on them. There was one I took to domino pizza where we drank ice cream and pizza of 20k. Only for her to reach house and tell me that she is broke she don't even have food to eat I should send her some token in her account. I tried to let her understand that today is our first date I think it is too early for that. That was the last time she talked to me again. My problem is not giving but y is it that they can't even tell me yes that they have accepted b4 start billing me.

20k..for what? Even 10k iwill make u look like u are trying too hard to impress....You are not even happy they disappeared..some will even give u green light but won't allow u to fvvck dem...but they will give u hope and milk u dry..lol
..3k or 5k date is okay..don't use expensive venue or expensive drinks or food
..infact go for cheap neat place...why waste ur money on gals who haven't shown any commitment for u..it's a wrong way to chike Naija gals

You should know in this era, it is far easier to go through the brutal path of becoming wealthy than to find a good woman to marry. Your experience is not an isolated case, it is general. Even worse, it will not get better. Sounds pessimistic right? okay, so let us go to the real deal. The girls do not love you, and honestly reading your post, it is obvious why. When a woman does not love a man, there is always a temptation in her female brain to recruit you as a sponsor, only a few have the integrity to let you go, not giving you a false illusion and embezzle you full-time. The girls you met lacks integrity, hence, they see you as a cash cow to cash out, not as husband material. If you meet a woman that truly wants you, you will know.

Also, you should work on your attractiveness. I am sure you are going for the women you find attractive, then hope that they have a good personality to complement it. It is the same for women. In fact, women objectify men, more than men will ever objectify women. If you doubt, ask short guys, even worse if he is broke as well, and god forbid, ugly too. So if you have a potbelly, lose it. Refine yourself to a point where it would be women coming for you. If you think women do not chase men, then you are probably not attractive enough. In a nutshell, you should be able to see yourself from the eyes of the opposite gender and be the best you can be. It's just self-respect.

zuby4real10:
Hello guys, I have this small issue bodering me about ladies these days. So please anybody that can advice me weather male or female can help. May be there is something I am not doing right.
I am a single guy in my early 30s looking for a serious and matured lady to start a relationship that will lead to marriage cos I am ready to settle down. The problem I am currently facing is that any time i try to toast a lady she will never tell me yes she have accepted or she love me too, the next thing that will happen is that she will start billing me with unnecessary demands which I will bluntly reject cos I did not even know my stand yet. This happens to me. This is the 5th attempt with in 6 months almost all from desame similar issues. The last one happened this morning from a lady I am disturbing all these while with serious romantic texts and calls full of i love u and other sweet words. The lady have never for once retaliate such gesture to me. Infact anytime I am chatting with her I try to bring love topic she will do as if as she did not see it. All of sudden this morning she sent me her account number that she need money to fix her hair and other stuffs to look beautiful for me on sallah day. This is a girl that I don't even know if we are dating or not.
My confusion now is that, these frequents demands are they a way saying yes that they have agreed or not or they are just testing us to know how serious we are with the love that we pronounced to them.? How can a lady that is feeling shy to even tell you that she loves you back will be comfortable asking you for money. I am very confused right. Is there anybody that can advice on what to do next time. My problem is not that I can't spend and care for woman that I know we are dating,but these girls did not even agree to date me.

Perhaps there is something about the way you come across that makes them take you for a mumu.

To answer your question, No. Asking you for money for hair do etc without showing you any form of affection is not acceptance. So it's best for you to stop wasting your time with these girls and look for a serious one.

And besides you don't just meet a girl and start professing love and sending love emojis. That's being fake and unrealistic with yourself. The girls will see through it and never take you serious because they know you don't really know them well enough and you are just being needy.

That's pretty immature if you ask me.

Rather, when you meet a girl newly you let her know that you like her and would like to be friends with her to know her more. This is a friendship period and you steer clear of throwing love emojis. Then if the friendship gets deeper and you guys are compatible, the love will come in naturally.
At that point she wouldn't even need to ask you for money because you would be willing to support her financially.

Bro, examine yourself and redefine your game. If you want a serious wife be calm, don't rush and take time to know the lady very well before you start exclaiming 'I love you'.

Peace be unto you.

zuby4real10:
Hello guys, I have this small issue bodering me about ladies these days. So please anybody that can advice me weather male or female can help. May be there is something I am not doing right.
I am a single guy in my early 30s looking for a serious and matured lady to start a relationship that will lead to marriage cos I am ready to settle down. The problem I am currently facing is that any time i try to toast a lady she will never tell me yes she have accepted or she love me too, the next thing that will happen is that she will start billing me with unnecessary demands which I will bluntly reject cos I did not even know my stand yet. This happens to me. This is the 5th attempt with in 6 months almost all from desame similar issues. The last one happened this morning from a lady I am disturbing all these while with serious romantic texts and calls full of i love u and other sweet words. The lady have never for once retaliate such gesture to me. Infact anytime I am chatting with her I try to bring love topic she will do as if as she did not see it. All of sudden this morning she sent me her account number that she need money to fix her hair and other stuffs to look beautiful for me on sallah day. This is a girl that I don't even know if we are dating or not.
My confusion now is that, these frequents demands are they a way saying yes that they have agreed or not or they are just testing us to know how serious we are with the love that we pronounced to them.? How can a lady that is feeling shy to even tell you that she loves you back will be comfortable asking you for money. I am very confused right. Is there anybody that can advice on what to do next time. My problem is not that I can't spend and care for woman that I know we are dating,but these girls did not even agree to date me.

We have been saying it with unceasing regularity that relationship with an opposite sex is transactional; it is a quid pro quo. If the bimbos are quick to submit their terms, nothing stops you from equally disclosing your demands. Why do you lamenting because someone is clearheaded enough to make their objectives unambiguously clear to you? It is you who has proven naive in the game, that has to sit up and learn the trade.

Hmmmmmmm....

luvmijeje:
Oga Ade, you are not serious. Do you know the meaning of a date? A date is not talking I love you on phone. It is taking a lady out as in going to Cinema, beach or anywhere that is not your house.

During that date, it is when you will start the story of your life. You will chip in the story of girls asking you for money and that you really don't want that kind of girl. Tell her money is not the issue but you really needs a lady that sees you and not your money.

But Oga, there is no how you won't spend o.

hmmm see mouth like going out

zuby4real10:
Hello guys, I have this small issue bodering me about ladies these days. So please anybody that can advice me weather male or female can help. May be there is something I am not doing right.
I am a single guy in my early 30s looking for a serious and matured lady to start a relationship that will lead to marriage cos I am ready to settle down. The problem I am currently facing is that any time i try to toast a lady she will never tell me yes she have accepted or she love me too, the next thing that will happen is that she will start billing me with unnecessary demands which I will bluntly reject cos I did not even know my stand yet. This happens to me. This is the 5th attempt with in 6 months almost all from desame similar issues. The last one happened this morning from a lady I am disturbing all these while with serious romantic texts and calls full of i love u and other sweet words. The lady have never for once retaliate such gesture to me. Infact anytime I am chatting with her I try to bring love topic she will do as if as she did not see it. All of sudden this morning she sent me her account number that she need money to fix her hair and other stuffs to look beautiful for me on sallah day. This is a girl that I don't even know if we are dating or not.
My confusion now is that, these frequents demands are they a way saying yes that they have agreed or not or they are just testing us to know how serious we are with the love that we pronounced to them.? How can a lady that is feeling shy to even tell you that she loves you back will be comfortable asking you for money. I am very confused right. Is there anybody that can advice on what to do next time. My problem is not that I can't spend and care for woman that I know we are dating,but these girls did not even agree to date me.

Be like say u get money, find me money make i drop my advice!
Sapa dey

Stupidquestions:
Next time,don't act too serious. Take it slow as if u don't care if she end up your babe or not..
Don't start with I want a gal friend...start with going on a date, gisting, talking abt different topics and life issues.. enjoy ursef laugh and catch fun.
Make sure it's a imple date ...don't spend more
than 3k or 5k max in the date...so it won't appear u are throwing money around to impress.
.
Don't chat love love stuff on WhatsApp....normals greetings, checking on you..and random shit .u can. Start convo based on her status. And don't check her status all the time.
.
Don't rush
.
When u call,don't do it often...and check her level of response and interest when she talks on phone
.
. When it's time to invite her to your place...like after two or three date maximum when she's a bit comfortable with u...tell her u will like her to know ur place, then observe her reaction or excuse....it will give u a sign if she's interested at all..
....If she gave too many excuse or fail to show up in 2 or max 3 attempted times u told her...then forget abt her...and don't call or chat her until maybe she contact u.

U be correct guy

zuby4real10:
Hello guys, I have this small issue bodering me about ladies these days. So please anybody that can advice me weather male or female can help. May be there is something I am not doing right.
I am a single guy in my early 30s looking for a serious and matured lady to start a relationship that will lead to marriage cos I am ready to settle down. The problem I am currently facing is that any time i try to toast a lady she will never tell me yes she have accepted or she love me too, the next thing that will happen is that she will start billing me with unnecessary demands which I will bluntly reject cos I did not even know my stand yet. This happens to me. This is the 5th attempt with in 6 months almost all from desame similar issues. The last one happened this morning from a lady I am disturbing all these while with serious romantic texts and calls full of i love u and other sweet words. The lady have never for once retaliate such gesture to me. Infact anytime I am chatting with her I try to bring love topic she will do as if as she did not see it. All of sudden this morning she sent me her account number that she need money to fix her hair and other stuffs to look beautiful for me on sallah day. This is a girl that I don't even know if we are dating or not.
My confusion now is that, these frequents demands are they a way saying yes that they have agreed or not or they are just testing us to know how serious we are with the love that we pronounced to them.? How can a lady that is feeling shy to even tell you that she loves you back will be comfortable asking you for money. I am very confused right. Is there anybody that can advice on what to do next time. My problem is not that I can't spend and care for woman that I know we are dating,but these girls did not even agree to date me.

If I say something, they will say I gave started

zuby4real10:

Thanks so much sir and all ur advices are noted sir. But belive me all these points that you mentioned I have applied them b4 nd they didn't work for me. Like the issue of trying to be friends with them first. The last lady is my best friend in school. She is my course mate, we are doing our masters program together. Having seen her age nd maturity nd how close we are I tried to give her a chance. The moment love issue start all of sudden she started billing me.

bro...you can only try to be friend and get to know someone....and if it doesnt work, you WALK AWAY. sadly, instead of doing that, you propose love to total strangers that you know nothing about... no wonder what you are doing fails each and every time.

again, the last lady is a FRIEND... so you should try to see if there is any possibilities to be more than friend (aka you go out together and step up your efforts to create something together that is more than friendship), but since there isnt any, there is no reason to talk about love to her....sadly, you are so desperate to get hitched that you are approaching anyone with this marriage/serious relationship talks, while you should FIRST find someone who feels about you the way you feel about them.

AGAIN, stop bastardizing the world "love". you have no respect for that word. thats why thesebroke assss women are billing you. if you knew what love is, you wouldnt throw it at every street corner, just because you are desperate for marriage.

zuby4real10:

All the 5 ladies I told you I have tried I took all of them to either cinema or restaurants where we gist nd relax b4 telling them my feelings on them. There was one I took to domino pizza where we drank ice cream and pizza of 20k. Only for her to reach house and tell me that she is broke she don't even have food to eat I should send her some token in her account. I tried to let her understand that today is our first date I think it is too early for that. That was the last time she talked to me again. My problem is not giving but y is it that they can't even tell me yes that they have accepted b4 start billing me.

lol, you try to impress these women with money, and then turn around and are surprized when these same women ask you for money. lol...
and funny enough, instead of saying NO outright, you are here pretending that what they are doing isnt wrong, but just "too early".

you havent met a smart conartist yet, as we all can see that a woman could just accept to date you and you will start paying her anything she wants from you (out of desperation to be in a r/ship)

zuby4real10:
Hello guys, I have this small issue bodering me about ladies these days. So please anybody that can advice me weather male or female can help. May be there is something I am not doing right.
I am a single guy in my early 30s looking for a serious and matured lady to start a relationship that will lead to marriage cos I am ready to settle down. The problem I am currently facing is that any time i try to toast a lady she will never tell me yes she have accepted or she love me too, the next thing that will happen is that she will start billing me with unnecessary demands which I will bluntly reject cos I did not even know my stand yet. This happens to me. This is the 5th attempt with in 6 months almost all from desame similar issues. The last one happened this morning from a lady I am disturbing all these while with serious romantic texts and calls full of i love u and other sweet words. The lady have never for once retaliate such gesture to me. Infact anytime I am chatting with her I try to bring love topic she will do as if as she did not see it. All of sudden this morning she sent me her account number that she need money to fix her hair and other stuffs to look beautiful for me on sallah day. This is a girl that I don't even know if we are dating or not.
My confusion now is that, these frequents demands are they a way saying yes that they have agreed or not or they are just testing us to know how serious we are with the love that we pronounced to them.? How can a lady that is feeling shy to even tell you that she loves you back will be comfortable asking you for money. I am very confused right. Is there anybody that can advice on what to do next time. My problem is not that I can't spend and care for woman that I know we are dating,but these girls did not even agree to date me.

You come off too needy, for you to successfully seduce it most be indirect.

Start off as friends and stop that text shit,you only send romantic text to a girl you are in a relationship with.

zuby4real10:
Hello guys, I have this small issue bodering me about ladies these days. So please anybody that can advice me weather male or female can help. May be there is something I am not doing right.
I am a single guy in my early 30s looking for a serious and matured lady to start a relationship that will lead to marriage cos I am ready to settle down. The problem I am currently facing is that any time i try to toast a lady she will never tell me yes she have accepted or she love me too, the next thing that will happen is that she will start billing me with unnecessary demands which I will bluntly reject cos I did not even know my stand yet. This happens to me. This is the 5th attempt with in 6 months almost all from desame similar issues. The last one happened this morning from a lady I am disturbing all these while with serious romantic texts and calls full of i love u and other sweet words. The lady have never for once retaliate such gesture to me. Infact anytime I am chatting with her I try to bring love topic she will do as if as she did not see it. All of sudden this morning she sent me her account number that she need money to fix her hair and other stuffs to look beautiful for me on sallah day. This is a girl that I don't even know if we are dating or not.
My confusion now is that, these frequents demands are they a way saying yes that they have agreed or not or they are just testing us to know how serious we are with the love that we pronounced to them.? How can a lady that is feeling shy to even tell you that she loves you back will be comfortable asking you for money. I am very confused right. Is there anybody that can advice on what to do next time. My problem is not that I can't spend and care for woman that I know we are dating,but these girls did not even agree to date me.

they don't love you..with time u will find your own.