CHRISTIAN COUPLES: S€X DOES NOT BEGIN IN THE BEDROOM....

Ruth Ekpo

I have noticed with disdain that in this part of our world, most Christian couples are not romantic at all. I can say with a heavy heart that romance is virtually dead in many christian marriages.

Many christian couples live like intimate strangers in the name of being spiritual and practicing holiness unto the Lord.

I was at a Christian couples' retreat some years ago where the guest speaker asked all the couples present to kiss each other.

My goodness! You needed to see the look on the faces of most of the couples at that meeting immediately that instruction was given; it was as if they had marched "poopoo". I was a bit irritated by the spirikokoism I saw on display that day.

That day, you will be shocked to see some wives' dodging the lips of their husbands, and some husbands did same to their wives.

In fact, the scene reminded me of that toothpaste advert in the 80s with the song we recomposed as , "Gbenu e soun, o foyin, o foyin, enu e n run"

Dear Husband, when last have you hugged your wife as you were going out or coming in? Do you even hug your wife at all? Or you think your body is the temple of God and must not be used for hugging?

Dear Wife, when last did you grab your husband's head and plant a kiss on his lips?

When last did you dance together? When last did you crack jokes together? When last did you leave the kids with grandma and travel on a fun vacation together? When last did you do pillow fight?

The only time some Christian men hold their wives' hands is when they want to pray together. Se ogun laye ni?

I charge all Christian couples, don't only PRAY together, PLAY together as well.

Husband, feel free to play the keyboard on your wife's body. You paid dowry over the owner of that body.

You see those twins on her chest! Whether they are Extra large, large, medium or small; size does not matter; It could be Water melon or agbalumo, believe me, size does not matter. Play with them regularly and skillfully. Squeeze them often. You think they are mere decorations? You think they are meant for the babies alone? No, sir! Use your hands and mouth skillfully on those things. It does not reduce your anointing.

Smack her playfully on her backyard once in a while! It's not a crime.

Wife, feel free to trouble that man in the other room. Fight like children doing ere ipa! It is allowed. Mummy, It does not reduce your spirituality. It even makes you to bond together. Mummy, do you even sit on Daddy's lap often? We know you are born again. We know you are Spirit filled. So are we too!

I remember how an older pastor advised me some time ago, "Pastor, I have seen how God's power has been flowing in your ministry and it's commendable. If you want to operate in more power, you have to limit how you meet your wife, too much sex with one's wife reduces the anointing." The reason I did not laugh right there before him was because of my respect for his age.

To be candid, Sex does not begin in the bedroom but outside it.

Husband, in the other room, don't just lay your wife on the bed and go straight into action. Haba! Kilode? Who is chasing you? What's the rush? Are you a "Russian?" Who is hurrying you up? Try to go downstairs and work some magic there with your hands.

Wife, don't just lie down on the bed like a log of wood showing no emotions or feelings while the man does all the action. What are your hands for? Kilode? Se Ogun laye ni? Let the man hear your ringtone. It's not a sin for ringtones to be playing in the other room.

"Haaa! Yee! Chimo o! Oooos! aaaas!" sounding in the other room is not a sin o. It doesn't mean you are not a virtuous woman. Infact any "other room" where there is no ringtone during fellowship is a cold room.

Many Christian homes are just too cold and most couples are too formal. Many Christian marriages are just too boring. No intimacy! No display of affection either openly or secretly. This shouldn't be. Christianity is not against romance.

Wife, Please don't listen to those women that are saying a man will still cheat no matter what you do to satisfy him during sex. Don't listen to such women and allow what they say to kill your enthusiasm and action in the other room.

I agree that a man that will cheat will still cheat but that is no excuse for you to be boring in the other room; because I have also seen men that were pushed out because of that. Though that's not a genuine excuse.

Uncle, Daddy, please wake up, be a Lion for aunty/mummy. Aunty, mummy, please wake up, be a Tigress for Uncle/Daddy in the other room.

I believe this will help many Christian marriages....

"But, man of God, I don't love sex. After all it is not food" If that is what I can hear you saying to me.

You want to know my response to you? It's simple: In Patience Jonathan's voice I will tell you "Wee you keep kwayet sir/ma? Why did you marry in the first place?"

Chai! Sorry! I have forgotten that as an apostle, I should be teaching you only spiritual things. We should all be focusing on spiritual things. I hope I'm still spiritual ba yi sha!

God bless your marriages out there.

Enough of the Voltron we are forming with ourselves. Let's be real and frank.

God bless all the couples out there. May your homes be heaven on earth.

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Christian couples need to read this.