Saintmary:


You're not married to her, so, her body does not belong to you.

Why didn't you plan your introduction so she will know you're serious?

At all at all na im bad pass.

If it’s the guy that broke up becos he found someone else...he would have been tagged all the horrible names in the world....

But when a woman breaks a mans’s heart..it’s now a case of “she doesn’t belong to him”

Can’t a man expect some level of loyalty from a woman he’s dating...??

She just clearly used and dumped him and it’s still his fault....

Yet she has the guts to manipulate him not to leave her ..

. if eating one’s cake and keeping it was a person....

Cut communication. Wepu Aka enwe n'ofe. Maka odi ka aka nmadu.

siofra:
Oga why are you generalising please?

Ahh!!! Siofra.. You are back.. Oya start all those your comments... I'm waiting for the feminazi* comments..

Believe it or not, those tears are from crocodile. She already concluded a long time ago. Let her leave, no be GOD leave you.

I was once in your shoe bro, is not easy mehn, though my own case is a li2 diff. I dnt knw why some girls decided so quick.

Guy! Just move on... You will get over her, likewise she will too even though it's hard. Pls concentrate more on your career, this will play a key role as you progress.
You didn't have any business dating while in School.
A man is not much without finance... You only get lots of pressure, disrespect and disappointments. Just concentrate on growing yourself first business-wise or job opportunity. You will be just fine.

Going through what may likely be the same for me too...
So I met this girl during my service year, and finished together bout a month now....
Did I all could do to break up the relationship ( broke up like 10times with her walai the thing no gree break o ) she fought for the relationship, and this is a very pretty baby face beautiful girl, and got other suitors trying to have her but even got to a point she was ready to die for the relationship (attempting suicide stuffs) we re both in love but age is not on side too,but she's insisting she wants me, but I doubt she's going to wait for me to generally balance...I don't put too much hope, I don't want heartbreak, although I'm not dating anyone else, if she's going to wait I'll marry her regardless of anything, but if otherwise, I'll wish her good luck and focus on my self even more...its a win win.....

I faced the same challenge some years ago. It took me up to 3 years to recover because I love the lady and we planned our life together. I have no option than to leave the state to another state. After 5 years, I met another lady, now I m married and very happy and my ex have 2 children and she is the one taking care of the children alone. The guy walked away after just few years of their marriage. I m not mocking her but whenever her friends talk about her in my presence, I always feel bad.
I don't really know why life is like that.

OP you just to forget about her i know it is not easy but you just have to, remember women re not like men and Age is also a big factor for them,I suggest you reduce communication,text to the minimum,now that she is finally settling down.

These ain't new anyway it happens you just have to move on.

She never went to stay with any aunt ,trust me she have been dating the guy for years too ,never trust a 9ja babe

"support her, we move, no be God leave you" omo dz particular point got me

A LOT OF LADIES OUT THERE ARE EITHER SELFISH, DAMAGED, UNSTABLE OR MATERIALISTIC OR ALL IN ONE.

SOME ARE JUST EMOTIONAL LIABILITIES TO ANYONE WHO INVESTS THEIR LOVE IN THEM.

SELFISH EXPECTATIONS LEFT RIGHT CENTER. NO LOVE! NO HONESTY!

MOVE ON BRO... NO BE GOD LEAVE YOU. NA WOMAN

backbencher:


Because a woman has a limited time to get pregnant and have children

Once a woman passes 35, it can become more and more difficult to have a child. The 'prime' childbearing age is in a woman's 20's. If a woman passes 30, problem starts. And if it reaches 35...it gets worse.

Some women even have 'premature menopause' by the time they reach 35, if not earlier.

Thank God for IVF...but that thing does not work immediately...it can be several rounds before there is success.

For us men, we can get a woman pregnant at the age of 90 self. We don't have the equivalent of menopause

Man what u said is d fact..no sentiment

When A Woman Love You Either You Are Poor Or Rich ...She Will Always Care

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nlAbNACAHh4

backbencher:


Because a woman has a limited time to get pregnant and have children

Once a woman passes 35, it can become more and more difficult to have a child. The 'prime' childbearing age is in a woman's 20's. If a woman passes 30, problem starts. And if it reaches 35...it gets worse.

Some women even have 'premature menopause' by the time they reach 35, if not earlier.

Thank God for IVF...but that thing does not work immediately...it can be several rounds before there is success.

For us men, we can get a woman pregnant at the age of 90 self. We don't have the equivalent of menopause

Man what u said is d fact..no sentiment

This is why I don't waste my time on Nigerian girls.

If you are not bringing money, connections, ideas and value to my life, I won't even date you. We will just be fucking carefully.

I am a man and I am hotcake.

IdreamOfUnicorn:
After four years of being with her you don't have intention to marry her and you expected her to stay put? You want to turn her to lord of the rings

Can't you read his story vividly? The guy just graduated 3 months ago, hr has not even gone for NYSC!! Oh, should he go and steal ??

Lasil:


OP,read the title of your topic again..

I dey think sey the thing never happened, may be the Op girlfriend don dey misbehaving somehow, and the guy dey try gather comments to console himself.

Reason with me alaye

Moreign001:
Hello Guys, Good Morning and a Happy Sunday to you all.

I don't know how concise i can be, but I will try.

I just graduated last 3 months, with my girlfriend who's now my ex, and she's 26yrs of age while I'm 28yr.

We started dating from our 200level till yesterday, (that's approximately 4yrs and counting...).
We were ideal together, we were well known in school, to an extent where her friends and mine kept asking how? And wishing theirs was like ours..

She promised never to leave, and she please everyday that I should never hurt her. At times we jokingly talked about our future kids which is now a never happening fable.

So after we graduated, she travelled to stay with her aunt, we do check on each other everyday.

Last month.. She called, and said her friend needs an advice, that she and her date just graduated, and that another man is asking her out, and she's thinking of dumping her guy since he's not ready, and that the newly known man is ready to pay for her marriage rites.
Immediately I knew she was the one in the story, because I already had several dreams were she left me. I pretended, I told her to tell her friend to "Follow Her Heart".

Last night she called, and said there's something she wants to tell me, I responded, "Is it what I already know?", she asked what? I told her she's getting married soon, and she said yes! I was speechless. I asked her for how long has this been going on, she said it started when she came to stay with her Aunt. We spoke, and I congratulated her, she started crying, I ended the call, sent her a good luck text.

This morning, she called and said she couldn't sleep last night. I asked her why she did it, why she decided to get married, she said she doesn't know. I asked if she likes the guy, she said yes. She couldn't stop crying and was saying I shouldn't leave her, while she's the one leaving me. I was totally down, but I have crazy friends. I WhatsApp a friend, told him what just happened, his words boosted me up. He said, " Support her, we move, no be God leave you". That was enough, but it's hard, really hard to move on without her, and she said the same thing and kept pleading I shouldn't leave her.
Now I'm asking, if I was the one who had left, what would have been the story? That I used her and dumped her, because this has always been used against the guys.
Why are women in a rush to marry? They don't even add value to themselves, I'm now 80% in agreement that marriage is one of the greatest achievement for a woman, maybe in Nigeria.

bro you try oooo, still communicating with her and taking all the emotional blackmail from her.
The best support you can give her like your guy said is cutting all ties with her, them no force her, na she chose the guy over you but that is life.
you're hurting yourself more by communicating with her, cut her completely, through all channels. Its time to double your hussle, channel all this energy and anger to doing something positive for yourself.

IAMBlesssed:
She wants to avoid being called evening newspaper by Nairaland guys..Lols

It's well Bro..Marry when you are ready.Dont let anyone pressure you into "doing pass yourself"..

1. She is not a nairalander.

2. Since when did you start carrying about the opinion of online strangers?

Shet happens.

Forget campus love, if you've not yet put a ring on the finger do know she's very much in the market.

garriAndsugar:
Most ladies feel once they are through with school or service, marriage should be next..

That's how one of my female friend too left me.. I just wished her well..

Omo, we plenty for this table sha.

Forget marriage, ladies generally are the most unstable, most unpredictable and most inconsistent beings God ever created. Even as an ordinary girlfriend/lover, she can spring negative surprises any moment. A lady that has been well and widely known with you, looking so inseparable from u can just leave ur house this evening, meet a guy she considers better on her way home, and from that moment you become history in her life. Call her the next morning to find out about her trip home last night and the story has changed!

luvmijeje:
See talk! If you are not married you are called names! We are shamed by families and by friends into marriage. We are been told if you don't settled down at 20's forget it at 30's. Society called women in their 30's different names. I understand why she couldn't wait

It takes a very very strong woman not to bend to pressure.

The single lives they are all afraid of is what they later end up with in their 30's and 40's but this time with kids. Is that not foolishness.

(@Bolded Statement)
You mean, even after marrying early before clocking 30, they would still end up living single lives again inside thier married homes at about their 30's and 40's??
..
I wish you could explain that line better please.

blinkz4real:
I love this .........support her, we move no be God leave you.

I was going to quote that yan abeg. That advice dope

So let me get this right , virtually everyone came up with excuses while it was right for the girl to move on, not saying some were genuine or not, now when all agree that this is the way most women see themselves in their mid to late 20s, why do we have a lot arguments when people talk of hypergamy, women seeking financial comfort and all from men before getting married , why do we have back and forth when issues like women looking for providers all the time, looking for comfort and rich men all over, why do we have arguements when there is issue of marriage being the only important thing a woman is thinking about in her 20s ?

Here we have a lady that is just finishing school and has not even served not to talk of having a job and independent planning a marriage and y'all feel it's normal and some even said all girls think along such line, the same people advocating for her and giving excuses will be the set to come out to debunk the hypergamy and comfort talk. It is well

Box18:
Dat is how many ladies got married to a man they don't love but still go ahead and marry him because he is financially ready and end up cheating on that same man with their ex boyfriend they truly love

My brother, it's a major reason a lot of kids do not belong to their supposed father but other men outside. Paternity fraud.

From comments here, especially from ladies, it's about biological clock, women being ready to marry in their 20s, friends, family and Nairalanders will be shaming unmarried women at 30, she married a guy who was ready, blah blah.....

Now the following seem to be the case:

Girls can marry just anyone ready to marry them.
Marriage is a major achievement.
Love has no role in marriage at all.
The woman has no will or power to defy what society will say but just a zombie following others. But a guy should always stand by the woman.
A girl might just accept to marry you as a shaming escape opportunity.
The woman can just leave a guy, no biggie.
A woman can leave one guy and go straight into marrying another man, the former has no right to make pim...
A lady with a guy can be scoping and tasting other guys if one of them will marry her.

Well, if this is what women are telling us we should accept from girls, then guys better wise up. A guy should know what to do and play the game better. He who meets a killer in a quiet, narrow alley must sort himself out and find a way to stay alive.

A nice thread!

Moreign001:

Yes,you're right. But I told her to wait just next year. That's too much?

Baba forget all these talk...

You are a man, if you don't have financial boyuance then you shouldn't talk about marriage.

Take the loss and move on.... It's a sad event tho but that's what life is all about.

I was in your shoes but in different setting, now getting ready to settle down with a Lady much younger than myself, who's got a vision for me just the way I have for her.

Moreign001:

Lol, thanks bro. But you just hit my wound! Bleep her, Chai.. My thing, lol.

This comment made me laugh..
Your thing??
How?

folake4u:
How do people date for 4years?

when are you getting married make i cum chop rice?

So the pussy wey this boy don Bleep tire for four 4 years,Na him one Man go begin dey postrate,dey kneel down dey spend serious money ontop wedding for..this life na balance

IdreamOfUnicorn:
After four years of being with her you don't have intention to marry her and you expected her to stay put? You want to turn her to lord of the rings