I noticed that we all tends to blame women anytime there is a crash in a marriage.. Everyone quickly assume that the woman is/was the reason the marriage couldn't work.. You start seeing different assumptions like she cheats on her husband, she is beautiful but doesn't have character, she keeps malice too much, she can't cook, she doesn't respect my family and so on..
Kindly note that all these assumptions happened without hearing from the woman side but we all bliv na the woman cause am... A guy said this on nairaland and u quote "beauty gives woman a home and character takes it away".
My question is, what of a wicked and irresponsible man?
What if a good woman marries a devil in disguise?
Do we still blame the woman for the inability to manage a toxic home?
Do we still she needs to endure the bitterness bcox she is a woman?
Is it only the women responsibility to keep the home even whne the husband is not ready for a home?
Who holds the husband responsible for his actions?

I think there needs to be a balance... We should not put the failure of a marriage on the woman's shoulder. It could have been the devil she married.

I come in peace. Good morning

No one is blaming all women for failed marriages ,but the truth be told : most failed marriages have a lot to do with the attitudes of women . Take this post for example, and see the level this woman is willing to go through just to make the life of this man miserable. And guess what? The law supports this sort of rubbish ! comehttps://www.nairaland.com/6869006/wife-changed-all-property-documents#107984563

Don't assume everybody blames women alone. Some are intelligent and wise enough to ask (or study) the situation around the problem before making the judgement.

It doesn't have to be women all the time.

First time I'm reading something sensible from you.

Iyaebe:
First time I'm reading something sensible from you.

Use your real moniker to quote me. Not the one u created 3 months ago to troll guys and garner attention

Thanks but I'm yet to see a sensible post or comment from you...

.

InTheCloudySky:
It takes two make a marriage work. Unless it's 100% clear that the woman is the sole cause of its failure, it's absurd to only blame her. Most of the time, it's women who initiate and file for divorce, not men. That alone means marital issues are usually perpetrated by men, to the point where the woman says they can't do again because they cannot come and die.

.
This quote made me create this post
Beauty has brought many ladies into matrimonial homes while character has sent them packing


I began to wonder what if the woman with good character and beauty marries a demon of a man, do we still blame her for the failure in her marriage

According to men/husbands,

Wife==endurance==happy home


So a woman that cannot endure in marriage is a bad wife.

Timekeeper:


Use your real moniker to quote me. Not the one u created 3 months ago to troll guys and garner attention

Thanks but I'm yet to see a sensible post or comment from you...

Real men don't talk back at women or fight them, try and be a real man

Iyaebe:
Real men don't talk back at women or fight them, try and be a real man

I bliv you but I still find it hard to believe that you are still yet to quit your toxic relationship from a supposed real man Dt he hits anytime he feels like.

Iyaebe:
Real men don't talk back at women or fight them, try and be a real man

No healthy woman can make this kind of manipulative statement or hold such nonsense belief and no healthy man can live by the manipulative statement or hold such nonsense belief. Real man my foot.

A bad mother, can be a good wife and a good wife could be a bad mother.

A good father may be a good husband and vice versa.....

That all I want to say

Timekeeper:


I bliv you but I still find it hard to believe that you are still yet to quit your toxic relationship from a supposed real man Dt he hits anytime he feels like.

I doff my Hart for you nairalanders and the way you concort and frame stories, maybe you are the toxic man I'm in a relationship with that hits me as well.

.

InTheCloudySky:
Yes, the quote is highly one-sided. It's obviously written by an ignorant and sexist Nigerian male who thinks a man is faultless when a married ends, when that's incredibly false in most divorce cases. Secondly, in this modern day, women have their own agency to freely choose to walk out of a [problematic] marriage, so the idea of a man sending a woman packing is archaic.



------------------------------------------
Click on these links to read the articles below:

https://www.divorcemag.com/blog/6-reasons-why-women-are-more-likely-to-file-for-divorce-than-men

https://www.whitleylawfirmpc.com/3-reasons-why-women-initiate-divorce-more-often-than-men/

Well let me summarize in case others don't want to click the link:

1. Women feel held back by their marriage. They feel like marriage is costing them more time compared to their husbands.

2. Women feel unsupported when they're making more money. You guessed right: jealous husbands.

3. Women can no longer tolerate unacceptable behavior. Most men have been trained that once they bring in money, they don't have to behave well.

Well things have changed and women are no longer ready to tolerate such behavior since their husbands are no longer the sole breadwinners.


So, my take is that if you're not the only breadwinner in your marriage, you have to learn good behavior if you don't want your wife to walk away. It's usually mostly about the money.

Money is very important.

Timekeeper:
I noticed that we all tends to blame women anytime there is a crash in a marriage.. Everyone quickly assume that the woman is/was the reason the marriage couldn't work.. You start seeing different assumptions like she cheats on her husband, she is beautiful but doesn't have character, she keeps malice too much, she can't cook, she doesn't respect my family and so on..
Kindly note that all these assumptions happened without hearing from the woman side but we all bliv na the woman cause am... A guy said this on nairaland and u quote "beauty gives woman a home and character takes it away".
My question is, what of a wicked and irresponsible man?
What if a good woman marries a devil in disguise?
Do we still blame the woman for the inability to manage a toxic home?
Do we still she needs to endure the bitterness bcox she is a woman?
Is it only the women responsibility to keep the home even whne the husband is not ready for a home?
Who holds the husband responsible for his actions?

I think there needs to be a balance... We should not put the failure of a marriage on the woman's shoulder. It could have been the devil she married.

I come in peace. Good morning

You and who blames women alone...una go jux wake up one morning begin reason unreasonable reasoning! Na who dey blame women alone na!?

Awesome summary.

Saintmary:


Well let me summarize in case others don't want to click the link:

1. Women feel held back by their marriage. They feel like marriage is costing them more time compared to their husbands.

2. Women feel unsupported when they're making more money. You guessed right: jealous husbands.

3. Women can no longer tolerate unacceptable behavior. Most men have been trained that once they bring in money, they don't have to behave well.

Well things have changed and women are no longer ready to tolerate such behavior since their husbands are no longer the sole breadwinners.


So, my take is that if you're not the only breadwinner in your marriage, you have to learn good behavior if you don't want your wife to walk away. It's usually mostly about the money.

Money is very important.

InTheCloudySky:
It takes two to make a marriage work. Unless it's 100% clear that the woman is the sole cause of its failure, it's absurd to only blame her. Most of the time sef, it's women who initiate and file for divorce, not men. That alone means marital issues are usually perpetrated by men , to the point where women will say they can't do again because they cannot come and die.

So because a woman filed for divorce first, it automatically means it's the man's fault??
Wawoooo ...

Iyaebe:
Real men don't talk back at women or fight them, try and be a real man

Kikikikikiki

See emotional blackmail...

So in a bid to prove he is a "real man", he shouldn't address an opinion he doesn't agree with, simply because it's from a woman??

Mtttttcheeeeewww...
Real men kor, fake men ni...

Ignorance ni

Foodqueen:
A bad mother, can be a good wife and a good wife could be a bad mother.

A good father may be a good husband and vice versa.....

That all I want to say

Hmm...
This is insightful and thought provoking...
Well said...

.

InTheCloudySky:
Yes. It's not what you want to hear but that's too bad. If a woman files for divorce and you take a look at the issues in the marriage, most likely they were caused by the man. It's usually not a one-time issue but a reoccurring one. It's usually not just one issue either but you may find a handful in the dynamic and marriage that led to her breaking point. Then again, sometimes it may just be one thing or incident that breaks the trust and causes irreparable damage to the marriage.

Let's take a look at Kim and Kanye's divorce, that Kim is still proceeding with. I'm not fan of hers but if you're familiar with Kanye's erratic behavior over the years; how he embarrassed her in public a number of times, such as with the appalling statements he made during his first presidential campaign rally in South Carolina last summer; their fight almost a year ago where he blew up at her, you would know he 100% pushed her to file for that divorce.

Kikikikikiki

Awk o...

Favfables1:



Kikikikikiki

Awk o...

No further comments, I suppose?

Timekeeper:
I noticed that we all tends to blame women anytime there is a crash in a marriage.. Everyone quickly assume that the woman is/was the reason the marriage couldn't work.. You start seeing different assumptions like she cheats on her husband, she is beautiful but doesn't have character, she keeps malice too much, she can't cook, she doesn't respect my family and so on..
Kindly note that all these assumptions happened without hearing from the woman side but we all bliv na the woman cause am... A guy said this on nairaland and u quote "beauty gives woman a home and character takes it away".
My question is, what of a wicked and irresponsible man?
What if a good woman marries a devil in disguise?
Do we still blame the woman for the inability to manage a toxic home?
Do we still she needs to endure the bitterness bcox she is a woman?
Is it only the women responsibility to keep the home even whne the husband is not ready for a home?
Who holds the husband responsible for his actions?

I think there needs to be a balance... We should not put the failure of a marriage on the woman's shoulder. It could have been the devil she married.

I come in peace. Good morning

In some situations, the blame are always shifted to the woman because they believe their son is a perfect man and with that, they don't want to know anything about the woman other than she is the cause of the problem

But when they take time to listen to the woman and discovered that it's the man's fault
They go under the carpet and keep quiet and that's when they will know that the woman have been through a lot of things

Timekeeper:
My question is, what of a wicked and irresponsible man?
What if a good woman marries a devil in disguise?
Do we still blame the woman for the inability to manage a toxic home?
Do we still she needs to endure the bitterness bcox she is a woman?
Is it only the women responsibility to keep the home even whne the husband is not ready for a home?
Who holds the husband responsible for his actions?

I think there needs to be a balance... We should not put the failure of a marriage on the woman's shoulder. It could have been the devil she married.
I come in peace. Good morning

The vast majority of Nigerians are small-minded and equally close-minded, so they cannot always see beyond that which they have come to accept as the norm. As a result, reality for them is still processed in the same way their parents and grandparents before them did.

Why??

Sheybi na them dey form "men are providers and women are home keepers".... So let them keep the home, if the house spoil, we know who to catch ....

Mentioners and quoters do small small abeg kikikikikiki

Favfables1:
Why??

Sheybi na them dey form "men are providers and women are home keepers".... So let them keep the home, if the house spoil, we know who to catch ....

Mentioners and quoters do small small abeg kikikikikiki

Wrong ! That idea came from your fathers and their fathers before them.

Kobojunkie:
Wrong ! That idea came from your fathers and their fathers before them.

Kikikikikiki


I'll pass...

InTheCloudySky:
It takes two to make a marriage work. Unless it's 100% clear that the woman is the sole cause of its failure, it's absurd to only blame her. Most of the time sef, it's women who initiate and file for divorce, not men. That alone means marital issues are usually perpetrated by men, to the point where women will say they can't do again because they cannot come and die.

In as much as the man didn't fall for her tricks & never ending wants.... Divorce is the next card.

Since the day of Adam,men have being receiving blames & punishments for their 'eves'. Eves had eyes,heart,brain,ears,mouth & she can reason,perceive,smell...but she fell for subtle serpent. She brought it upon Adam.

Since they don't want to submit to the men.. They will get blame for it. They want everything done their way otherwise divorce is the worse case.


Vashti lost her place

Esther 1:12 But the queen Vashti refused to come at the king's commandment by his chamberlains: therefore was the king very wroth, and his anger burned in him.