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I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend - Romance (5) - Nairaland

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Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by sugarbeesmith(m): 9:15am On Mar 09, 2022
GooodHardDick:
Trash!! Hoes everywhere!

Nigeria girls are so useless, all of them. They're so broke and senseless for my liking. Na why dem dey always use dem for rituals
calm down bro

1 Like

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Raggy(m): 9:15am On Mar 09, 2022
Confused fellow
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by MONEY247: 9:16am On Mar 09, 2022
Relationship!! Relationship!! Relationship!!!
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by saintnegroid(m): 9:16am On Mar 09, 2022
MamiTer:
Hello good people of nairaland, I have a pressing issue and I really need your help.

A couple of years back I broke up with my boyfriend whom I really loved due to distance barriers. Getting over him was difficult for me so I had to go into a relationship with one of my toasters in order to get him off my mind.

I achieved my aim after a couple of months but the current guy was unwilling to let go, I didn't love him and couldn't get myself to love him despite trying to. I know I was selfish and opened up to him but he insisted that I would warm up to him with time and grow to love him.

The relationship was far from perfect, I was in it solely for what I benefited but we weren't compatible and it was from one issue to another. We were always at logger heads all the time. He insults me and my family at any given opportunity and talks down on me using secrets I shared with him as leverage each time we quarrel. He shredded my self-esteem.

He was insecure and attacked my male friends at any given opportunity including my lecturers, he would access my social media accounts and send derogatory message to any male contact he feels is making a pass at me.
All these attitudes made me fed up with him and I decided to breakup for good.

Early this year I met a guy online and somehow we vibed together quickly, we met physically for the first time and it felt like we've known for ages. Everything moved so quickly with this new guy that I started developing serious feelings for him. I was scared because I never knew I would feel something like that again after I broke up with my other ex.

This new guy makes me happy and treats me like a woman, anytime spent with him is always memorable and I don't feel like leaving. The chemistry that we share is super strong and everything seems so perfect.

Now to my issue, this new guy is a fresh graduate and not yet stable, I don't have issues with his financial status because he made me realize a Lady can actually be happy without money being thrown at her. But I'm still scared of going all full into the relationship he might go for service and never come back to me. I don't just want a repeat of my previous relationship that got shattered after my ex relocated.

On the other hand, the other guy is hell bent on getting me back, he's been pleading and sending people to beg me even though I told him I've moved on and has even had sex with the new guy but he still wants me back.

I'm confused and don't know what to do, my heart is with the new guy but the other guy is making things so difficult for me and almost driving me insane. Can I still grow to love him?? Though I've been unable to after almost a year.

Should move on with the new guy?? I've known him for barely two months but it seems I've known him for ages, my feelings are exploding and I can hardly control them which is making me scared.

I'm sorry for the long epistle but I had to let it all out.
Please advice me.
while you are pursuing fantasies also think about your future... Love is not all that matters... There are other things... Age is also a factor... If the age favours you then you can play along... But you need to select a guy that you both can take care of each other financially and moves ahead to get settled.... That's the main essence of relationship if I may say.

1 Like

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Blackdisciple(m): 9:20am On Mar 09, 2022
Really you don't know what you want...
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by promisedwealth(m): 9:38am On Mar 09, 2022
MamiTer:
Hello good people of nairaland, I have a pressing issue and I really need your help.

A couple of years back I broke up with my boyfriend whom I really loved due to distance barriers. Getting over him was difficult for me so I had to go into a relationship with one of my toasters in order to get him off my mind.

I achieved my aim after a couple of months but the current guy was unwilling to let go, I didn't love him and couldn't get myself to love him despite trying to. I know I was selfish and opened up to him but he insisted that I would warm up to him with time and grow to love him.

The relationship was far from perfect, I was in it solely for what I benefited but we weren't compatible and it was from one issue to another. We were always at logger heads all the time. He insults me and my family at any given opportunity and talks down on me using secrets I shared with him as leverage each time we quarrel. He shredded my self-esteem.

He was insecure and attacked my male friends at any given opportunity including my lecturers, he would access my social media accounts and send derogatory message to any male contact he feels is making a pass at me.
All these attitudes made me fed up with him and I decided to breakup for good.

Early this year I met a guy online and somehow we vibed together quickly, we met physically for the first time and it felt like we've known for ages. Everything moved so quickly with this new guy that I started developing serious feelings for him. I was scared because I never knew I would feel something like that again after I broke up with my other ex.

This new guy makes me happy and treats me like a woman, anytime spent with him is always memorable and I don't feel like leaving. The chemistry that we share is super strong and everything seems so perfect.

Now to my issue, this new guy is a fresh graduate and not yet stable, I don't have issues with his financial status because he made me realize a Lady can actually be happy without money being thrown at her. But I'm still scared of going all full into the relationship he might go for service and never come back to me. I don't just want a repeat of my previous relationship that got shattered after my ex relocated.

On the other hand, the other guy is hell bent on getting me back, he's been pleading and sending people to beg me even though I told him I've moved on and has even had sex with the new guy but he still wants me back.

I'm confused and don't know what to do, my heart is with the new guy but the other guy is making things so difficult for me and almost driving me insane. Can I still grow to love him?? Though I've been unable to after almost a year.

Should move on with the new guy?? I've known him for barely two months but it seems I've known him for ages, my feelings are exploding and I can hardly control them which is making me scared.

I'm sorry for the long epistle but I had to let it all out.
Please advice me.
you just proved the young man Right ' you where never to be trusted hear your self you meet someone online you vibed together. You did all these while dating the guys what kind of lady are you? I believe the young man was busy trying hard to make it all work out. While you busy searching playing hide and seek, this here it's the reason a lot of guys are scared of dating or going into a relationship most of you ladies are more confused than This country.
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Highter1(m): 9:38am On Mar 09, 2022
MamiTer:
Hello good people of nairaland, I have a pressing issue and I really need your help.

A couple of years back I broke up with my boyfriend whom I really loved due to distance barriers. Getting over him was difficult for me so I had to go into a relationship with one of my toasters in order to get him off my mind.

I achieved my aim after a couple of months but the current guy was unwilling to let go, I didn't love him and couldn't get myself to love him despite trying to. I know I was selfish and opened up to him but he insisted that I would warm up to him with time and grow to love him.

The relationship was far from perfect, I was in it solely for what I benefited but we weren't compatible and it was from one issue to another. We were always at logger heads all the time. He insults me and my family at any given opportunity and talks down on me using secrets I shared with him as leverage each time we quarrel. He shredded my self-esteem.

He was insecure and attacked my male friends at any given opportunity including my lecturers, he would access my social media accounts and send derogatory message to any male contact he feels is making a pass at me.
All these attitudes made me fed up with him and I decided to breakup for good.

Early this year I met a guy online and somehow we vibed together quickly, we met physically for the first time and it felt like we've known for ages. Everything moved so quickly with this new guy that I started developing serious feelings for him. I was scared because I never knew I would feel something like that again after I broke up with my other ex.

This new guy makes me happy and treats me like a woman, anytime spent with him is always memorable and I don't feel like leaving. The chemistry that we share is super strong and everything seems so perfect.

Now to my issue, this new guy is a fresh graduate and not yet stable, I don't have issues with his financial status because he made me realize a Lady can actually be happy without money being thrown at her. But I'm still scared of going all full into the relationship he might go for service and never come back to me. I don't just want a repeat of my previous relationship that got shattered after my ex relocated.

On the other hand, the other guy is hell bent on getting me back, he's been pleading and sending people to beg me even though I told him I've moved on and has even had sex with the new guy but he still wants me back.

I'm confused and don't know what to do, my heart is with the new guy but the other guy is making things so difficult for me and almost driving me insane. Can I still grow to love him?? Though I've been unable to after almost a year.

Should move on with the new guy?? I've known him for barely two months but it seems I've known him for ages, my feelings are exploding and I can hardly control them which is making me scared.

I'm sorry for the long epistle but I had to let it all out.
Please advice me.
Telling the other guy you have had sex with the new guy in other to set him off is not a good idea....Giving the fact that he attacked you on your formal shared secret. My advice is that if you are breaking up with a guy..do it with your full chest and not on and off......the consequence is catastrophic.
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Emmanuel30a: 9:44am On Mar 09, 2022
You see, nobody is reliable, dependable and indispensable. The problem and question here is: why would a lady wake up and all she think about is a man? We have women who have built houses, buy cars and have millions and billions before they are thinking about men. The same thing is applicable to men. For GOD sake, you are not ready, steady... You are needy. You are not capable let alone be able to be stable and durable in relationship. You are just infatuated and lustful after men because of money and sexual pleasure-fornication which is sinful, prohibited and abomination in the sight of GOD. My people perish because they lack knowledge. In all your getting, get wisdom. Don't be under spell. Don't die a sinner when you were born in sin.

4 Likes

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by justking(m): 9:46am On Mar 09, 2022
Indeed a long epistle.
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Fatigah12: 9:46am On Mar 09, 2022
There are 2 sides to a story, and you write up is incomplete.

questions only u can answer.

what have u invested in yourself.
what have u contributed to your partners life
how do u portray your family{ that leads to insult} ( etc paying yor family rent/paying your school fee/feeding your family}
No relationship is perfect. you are playing with 2 hearts,
what are your goals.
why do you have your lecturer contact
From your write up , seems he contributes to the wellfair of your family, (been ungratefull if thats the case)
You are not ready to invest, ready looking for ready made.
You did not include what you have contributed, but only what u stand to gain.
And you have not mention how many people you vibe with, you only mention one.
vibe 2 months /sex.
Am not judging you,. But you need self reflection. it helps.

set out a goal , what you want in a man,
what you are ready to invest in the life of your partner
what you can cope with.
Be honest
cut your coat according to your size,
Every Dream in life is possible.

Note ladies should understand , there is no perfect guy. And if you want a good home and future, You have to invest in your man.
A guy buying stuff or taking care of your needs, does not equate or qualify for love. because tomorrow , Things can change . Be happy with whatever he has, be ready to contribute
in any form . advice , express your feelings , in areas you have concern politely and respectfully. The road to every successful home or relationship is full of barriers , just have to find a way to overcome it together.
i

2 Likes

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Lordhades21(m): 9:47am On Mar 09, 2022
Nigerians!!! You all can be brutal with your replies. The lady in question ain't perfect, how many of you have your shit together all the time??

My dear lady, life is too short to waste it on people who try to take your peace especially if you had put in a great amount of effort to make it better. I say stick with the new guy but think with your brain too cause love in the early stages can be fleeting. Take a good time to think about what you really want from a man and set your pass mark. A realistic one.
Nobody can be perfect. In the end go with what you know is good for you and what u can handle when the going gets tough. So u have no complaints later.
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Alabo7978(m): 9:49am On Mar 09, 2022
MamiTer:
Hello good people of nairaland, I have a pressing issue and I really need your help.

A couple of years back I broke up with my boyfriend whom I really loved due to distance barriers. Getting over him was difficult for me so I had to go into a relationship with one of my toasters in order to get him off my mind.

I achieved my aim after a couple of months but the current guy was unwilling to let go, I didn't love him and couldn't get myself to love him despite trying to. I know I was selfish and opened up to him but he insisted that I would warm up to him with time and grow to love him.

The relationship was far from perfect, I was in it solely for what I benefited but we weren't compatible and it was from one issue to another. We were always at logger heads all the time. He insults me and my family at any given opportunity and talks down on me using secrets I shared with him as leverage each time we quarrel. He shredded my self-esteem.

He was insecure and attacked my male friends at any given opportunity including my lecturers, he would access my social media accounts and send derogatory message to any male contact he feels is making a pass at me.
All these attitudes made me fed up with him and I decided to breakup for good.

Early this year I met a guy online and somehow we vibed together quickly, we met physically for the first time and it felt like we've known for ages. Everything moved so quickly with this new guy that I started developing serious feelings for him. I was scared because I never knew I would feel something like that again after I broke up with my other ex.

This new guy makes me happy and treats me like a woman, anytime spent with him is always memorable and I don't feel like leaving. The chemistry that we share is super strong and everything seems so perfect.

Now to my issue, this new guy is a fresh graduate and not yet stable, I don't have issues with his financial status because he made me realize a Lady can actually be happy without money being thrown at her. But I'm still scared of going all full into the relationship he might go for service and never come back to me. I don't just want a repeat of my previous relationship that got shattered after my ex relocated.

On the other hand, the other guy is hell bent on getting me back, he's been pleading and sending people to beg me even though I told him I've moved on and has even had sex with the new guy but he still wants me back.

I'm confused and don't know what to do, my heart is with the new guy but the other guy is making things so difficult for me and almost driving me insane. Can I still grow to love him?? Though I've been unable to after almost a year.

Should move on with the new guy?? I've known him for barely two months but it seems I've known him for ages, my feelings are exploding and I can hardly control them which is making me scared.

I'm sorry for the long epistle but I had to let it all out.
Please advice me.
two months and you've already bleeped someone from Facebook?
you can't even keep the cookie in the jar for atleast 5 months to actually see if he's for real.

you lots are shameless abeg.
he woved his magic well and smashed you in less that 5weeks and I applaud him.
he's young, and when he goes for NYSC he'll go to smash other girls while he also smashes you too whenever you both see, and at the end of it he'll focus on his main babe, while still smashing you too once in a while.

4 Likes

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by godlessmind: 9:52am On Mar 09, 2022
MamiTer:
Hello good people of nairaland, I have a pressing issue and I really need your help.

A couple of years back I broke up with my boyfriend whom I really loved due to distance barriers. Getting over him was difficult for me so I had to go into a relationship with one of my toasters in order to get him off my mind.

I achieved my aim after a couple of months but the current guy was unwilling to let go, I didn't love him and couldn't get myself to love him despite trying to. I know I was selfish and opened up to him but he insisted that I would warm up to him with time and grow to love him.

The relationship was far from perfect, I was in it solely for what I benefited but we weren't compatible and it was from one issue to another. We were always at logger heads all the time. He insults me and my family at any given opportunity and talks down on me using secrets I shared with him as leverage each time we quarrel. He shredded my self-esteem.

He was insecure and attacked my male friends at any given opportunity including my lecturers, he would access my social media accounts and send derogatory message to any male contact he feels is making a pass at me.
All these attitudes made me fed up with him and I decided to breakup for good.

Early this year I met a guy online and somehow we vibed together quickly, we met physically for the first time and it felt like we've known for ages. Everything moved so quickly with this new guy that I started developing serious feelings for him. I was scared because I never knew I would feel something like that again after I broke up with my other ex.

This new guy makes me happy and treats me like a woman, anytime spent with him is always memorable and I don't feel like leaving. The chemistry that we share is super strong and everything seems so perfect.

Now to my issue, this new guy is a fresh graduate and not yet stable, I don't have issues with his financial status because he made me realize a Lady can actually be happy without money being thrown at her. But I'm still scared of going all full into the relationship he might go for service and never come back to me. I don't just want a repeat of my previous relationship that got shattered after my ex relocated.

On the other hand, the other guy is hell bent on getting me back, he's been pleading and sending people to beg me even though I told him I've moved on and has even had sex with the new guy but he still wants me back.

I'm confused and don't know what to do, my heart is with the new guy but the other guy is making things so difficult for me and almost driving me insane. Can I still grow to love him?? Though I've been unable to after almost a year.

Should move on with the new guy?? I've known him for barely two months but it seems I've known him for ages, my feelings are exploding and I can hardly control them which is making me scared.

I'm sorry for the long epistle but I had to let it all out.
Please advice me.


Another confused Nigerian girl who doesn't know what she actually wants... grin
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Emma1Oj(m): 9:53am On Mar 09, 2022
Spider20:

Rubbish undecided undecided
Lol... I trust you guys never to disappoint.
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Winsolution: 9:53am On Mar 09, 2022
You better mk up your mind on who to be with. You dnt love the guy that is ready to be with u, u said he mornitors u(though he is weak, suffering from infiriority complex). But u made him to b suspicious of you. U may be young nw and ready to flex, but remember soon you 'll get to your 30s, all this small boys 'll get to their 30s too and start to look for younger girls to marry. Time runs faster than we may think.
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by DrFunmisticGlow: 9:57am On Mar 09, 2022
MamiTer:
Hello good people of nairaland, I have a pressing issue and I really need your help.

A couple of years back I broke up with my boyfriend whom I really loved due to distance barriers. Getting over him was difficult for me so I had to go into a relationship with one of my toasters in order to get him off my mind.

I achieved my aim after a couple of months but the current guy was unwilling to let go, I didn't love him and couldn't get myself to love him despite trying to. I know I was selfish and opened up to him but he insisted that I would warm up to him with time and grow to love him.

The relationship was far from perfect, I was in it solely for what I benefited but we weren't compatible and it was from one issue to another. We were always at logger heads all the time. He insults me and my family at any given opportunity and talks down on me using secrets I shared with him as leverage each time we quarrel. He shredded my self-esteem.

He was insecure and attacked my male friends at any given opportunity including my lecturers, he would access my social media accounts and send derogatory message to any male contact he feels is making a pass at me.
All these attitudes made me fed up with him and I decided to breakup for good.

Early this year I met a guy online and somehow we vibed together quickly, we met physically for the first time and it felt like we've known for ages. Everything moved so quickly with this new guy that I started developing serious feelings for him. I was scared because I never knew I would feel something like that again after I broke up with my other ex.

This new guy makes me happy and treats me like a woman, anytime spent with him is always memorable and I don't feel like leaving. The chemistry that we share is super strong and everything seems so perfect.

Now to my issue, this new guy is a fresh graduate and not yet stable, I don't have issues with his financial status because he made me realize a Lady can actually be happy without money being thrown at her. But I'm still scared of going all full into the relationship he might go for service and never come back to me. I don't just want a repeat of my previous relationship that got shattered after my ex relocated.

On the other hand, the other guy is hell bent on getting me back, he's been pleading and sending people to beg me even though I told him I've moved on and has even had sex with the new guy but he still wants me back.

I'm confused and don't know what to do, my heart is with the new guy but the other guy is making things so difficult for me and almost driving me insane. Can I still grow to love him?? Though I've been unable to after almost a year.

Should move on with the new guy?? I've known him for barely two months but it seems I've known him for ages, my feelings are exploding and I can hardly control them which is making me scared.

I'm sorry for the long epistle but I had to let it all out.
Please advice me.
that your ex sounds like a narcissist. Leave him in the past.Block him everywhere

For your new guy. Watch and wait. Let the honeymoon phase pass. Two months is not enough time to know his true character, he may also be lovebombing you.

As for your new guy traveling, if it will be, it will be. Don't worry about it. Just do your best and continue what you are doing.

3 Likes

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by viceddy95(m): 9:57am On Mar 09, 2022
Where do you live and your first ex guy which country does he live.... Let's start from here before we can advice you...

1 Like

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by leo22(m): 9:59am On Mar 09, 2022
phintohlar:
My dear, you are not even supposed to ask this question at all, so you'll rather prefer to stay with a bully right? Well the choice is yours

It isn't right to label the guy a bully, let us learn how to balance issues and give proper advice based on objective reasoning.

She got what she deserved from the past relationship, she chose the guy selfishly for personal benefits without loving him, she made a decision not to have feelings for him, in other words, she used him for her personal gains and the fruits from the relationship is exactly from the seeds she planted.

The former guy is responding correctly to her stimuli, but the good news is that she feels good about the new guy and I advise every woman to stick to whom she loves and have emotional compatibility with, but the problem be say who una love no get the kind vibe and Money wey dey una eye hence this post, if only she can go with her feelings and learn not to be selfish, then she can find happiness.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Omoiyasly(m): 10:02am On Mar 09, 2022
You wey no dey confuse abeg tell her wetin she go do must you guys talk anyhow just because you want people to know u exist.
YinkaOlusesi16:
You don`t know what you want & you will never know what you want. To me you are just a confused fellow
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Charx122: 10:04am On Mar 09, 2022
MamiTer:
Hello good people of nairaland, I have a pressing issue and I really need your help.

A couple of years back I broke up with my boyfriend whom I really loved due to distance barriers. Getting over him was difficult for me so I had to go into a relationship with one of my toasters in order to get him off my mind.

I achieved my aim after a couple of months but the current guy was unwilling to let go, I didn't love him and couldn't get myself to love him despite trying to. I know I was selfish and opened up to him but he insisted that I would warm up to him with time and grow to love him.

The relationship was far from perfect, I was in it solely for what I benefited but we weren't compatible and it was from one issue to another. We were always at logger heads all the time. He insults me and my family at any given opportunity and talks down on me using secrets I shared with him as leverage each time we quarrel. He shredded my self-esteem.

He was insecure and attacked my male friends at any given opportunity including my lecturers, he would access my social media accounts and send derogatory message to any male contact he feels is making a pass at me.
All these attitudes made me fed up with him and I decided to breakup for good.

Early this year I met a guy online and somehow we vibed together quickly, we met physically for the first time and it felt like we've known for ages. Everything moved so quickly with this new guy that I started developing serious feelings for him. I was scared because I never knew I would feel something like that again after I broke up with my other ex.

This new guy makes me happy and treats me like a woman, anytime spent with him is always memorable and I don't feel like leaving. The chemistry that we share is super strong and everything seems so perfect.

Now to my issue, this new guy is a fresh graduate and not yet stable, I don't have issues with his financial status because he made me realize a Lady can actually be happy without money being thrown at her. But I'm still scared of going all full into the relationship he might go for service and never come back to me. I don't just want a repeat of my previous relationship that got shattered after my ex relocated.

On the other hand, the other guy is hell bent on getting me back, he's been pleading and sending people to beg me even though I told him I've moved on and has even had sex with the new guy but he still wants me back.

I'm confused and don't know what to do, my heart is with the new guy but the other guy is making things so difficult for me and almost driving me insane. Can I still grow to love him?? Though I've been unable to after almost a year.

Should move on with the new guy?? I've known him for barely two months but it seems I've known him for ages, my feelings are exploding and I can hardly control them which is making me scared.

I'm sorry for the long epistle but I had to let it all out.
Please advice me.

I didn't have to finish reading all you wrote down reasons
From the first paragraph sounded like the typical Nigerian impatient
Female.
I'm not here to burst your bubbles never misunderstand what the word Love is
Does it make sense? left a relationship because of distance and then rushed into
Another one just to archive your aim .. Sexual urges couldnt be held down
What you didn't know that distance was made for you to understand the test of time
Should just in case you both get married in the future..Now you find yourself tangled
Retrace your steps ..that's all I can say You can never eat your cake and have it.

1 Like

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Tribalism123(m): 10:06am On Mar 09, 2022
MamiTer:
Hello good people of nairaland, I have a pressing issue and I really need your help.

A couple of years back I broke up with my boyfriend whom I really loved due to distance barriers. Getting over him was difficult for me so I had to go into a relationship with one of my toasters in order to get him off my mind.

I achieved my aim after a couple of months but the current guy was unwilling to let go, I didn't love him and couldn't get myself to love him despite trying to. I know I was selfish and opened up to him but he insisted that I would warm up to him with time and grow to love him.

The relationship was far from perfect, I was in it solely for what I benefited but we weren't compatible and it was from one issue to another. We were always at logger heads all the time. He insults me and my family at any given opportunity and talks down on me using secrets I shared with him as leverage each time we quarrel. He shredded my self-esteem.

He was insecure and attacked my male friends at any given opportunity including my lecturers, he would access my social media accounts and send derogatory message to any male contact he feels is making a pass at me.
All these attitudes made me fed up with him and I decided to breakup for good.

Early this year I met a guy online and somehow we vibed together quickly, we met physically for the first time and it felt like we've known for ages. Everything moved so quickly with this new guy that I started developing serious feelings for him. I was scared because I never knew I would feel something like that again after I broke up with my other ex.

This new guy makes me happy and treats me like a woman, anytime spent with him is always memorable and I don't feel like leaving. The chemistry that we share is super strong and everything seems so perfect.

Now to my issue, this new guy is a fresh graduate and not yet stable, I don't have issues with his financial status because he made me realize a Lady can actually be happy without money being thrown at her. But I'm still scared of going all full into the relationship he might go for service and never come back to me. I don't just want a repeat of my previous relationship that got shattered after my ex relocated.

On the other hand, the other guy is hell bent on getting me back, he's been pleading and sending people to beg me even though I told him I've moved on and has even had sex with the new guy but he still wants me back.

I'm confused and don't know what to do, my heart is with the new guy but the other guy is making things so difficult for me and almost driving me insane. Can I still grow to love him?? Though I've been unable to after almost a year.

Should move on with the new guy?? I've known him for barely two months but it seems I've known him for ages, my feelings are exploding and I can hardly control them which is making me scared.

I'm sorry for the long epistle but I had to let it all out.
Please advice me.


If all of us share our problems for social media, who go de do the advise. Carry ur cross and cross the other lane.
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Basicend: 10:10am On Mar 09, 2022
Ekzoba:
Your not matured for relationship and stop sharing your kpekus like akara.

I tire o bro.

She is not matured yet at all. Her mind is still very childish.

1 Like

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by jaxxy(m): 10:11am On Mar 09, 2022
MamiTer:
Hello good people of nairaland, I have a pressing issue and I really need your help.

A couple of years back I broke up with my boyfriend whom I really loved due to distance barriers. Getting over him was difficult for me so I had to go into a relationship with one of my toasters in order to get him off my mind.

I achieved my aim after a couple of months but the current guy was unwilling to let go, I didn't love him and couldn't get myself to love him despite trying to. I know I was selfish and opened up to him but he insisted that I would warm up to him with time and grow to love him.

The relationship was far from perfect, I was in it solely for what I benefited but we weren't compatible and it was from one issue to another. We were always at logger heads all the time. He insults me and my family at any given opportunity and talks down on me using secrets I shared with him as leverage each time we quarrel. He shredded my self-esteem.

He was insecure and attacked my male friends at any given opportunity including my lecturers, he would access my social media accounts and send derogatory message to any male contact he feels is making a pass at me.
All these attitudes made me fed up with him and I decided to breakup for good.

Early this year I met a guy online and somehow we vibed together quickly, we met physically for the first time and it felt like we've known for ages. Everything moved so quickly with this new guy that I started developing serious feelings for him. I was scared because I never knew I would feel something like that again after I broke up with my other ex.

This new guy makes me happy and treats me like a woman, anytime spent with him is always memorable and I don't feel like leaving. The chemistry that we share is super strong and everything seems so perfect.

Now to my issue, this new guy is a fresh graduate and not yet stable, I don't have issues with his financial status because he made me realize a Lady can actually be happy without money being thrown at her. But I'm still scared of going all full into the relationship he might go for service and never come back to me. I don't just want a repeat of my previous relationship that got shattered after my ex relocated.

On the other hand, the other guy is hell bent on getting me back, he's been pleading and sending people to beg me even though I told him I've moved on and has even had sex with the new guy but he still wants me back.

I'm confused and don't know what to do, my heart is with the new guy but the other guy is making things so difficult for me and almost driving me insane. Can I still grow to love him?? Though I've been unable to after almost a year.

Should move on with the new guy?? I've known him for barely two months but it seems I've known him for ages, my feelings are exploding and I can hardly control them which is making me scared.

I'm sorry for the long epistle but I had to let it all out.
Please advice me.

U need to learn how to stay single and stop jumping from one relationship to the other seeking some type of validation or emotional security or sexual satisfaction. When U rush into relationships u make many mistakes u shouldn’t normally.

As for the 2nd guy with the toxic relationship don’t even think of going back there cos u might regret it, obesssed and toxic people hardly change. Stay by urself and take ur time to find what suits u.

The 3rd person seems to click with u bt the situation is unpredictable for many factors and I’m guessing he sees it as a short term relationship.

2months and Ure sleeping with him and expecting a long term relationship?? Well it depends on how sensible each party is.

1 Like

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by emperordelis(m): 10:12am On Mar 09, 2022
Kingpee2:
You are not confused ,you just love preeq and also your heart is not matured enough yet for a relationship,if at this stage of your life you are still battling between your past and present I doubt if you know exactly what you are doing ,you want to eat your cake and have it ,you said you moved on and yet still getting drawn to your past ,my ex visited me and told me she wanted space and break up ,sharp guy like me ,I was just laughing because I’ve got too much of them and needed to even let some of them go ,heartbreak isn’t for a man like me ,she notices how I view her status on whatsapp and even get to check up on her once in a while,one morning I just stopped checking up on her and the only thing I do is just to see status,babe called me up one day and said I dont even care about her ,for my mind I just said what exactly do these girls want ,the human truth is that ,women are at loss breaking up from one guy to the other because na their Totoooh mileage go dey count and trust me ,it’s dropping from preeq to another ,so automatically just know that after your breakup to another Na preeq you just dey change no be man ...I have no advise for you because you are not matured enough to advise yourself rather than waiting for advise from others .....Your age is just counting you are not matured yet....


Yama yama guy grin cheesy grin grin grin grin
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Nat404: 10:12am On Mar 09, 2022
MamiTer:
Hello good people of nairaland, I have a pressing issue and I really need your help.

A couple of years back I broke up with my boyfriend whom I really loved due to distance barriers. Getting over him was difficult for me so I had to go into a relationship with one of my toasters in order to get him off my mind.

I achieved my aim after a couple of months but the current guy was unwilling to let go, I didn't love him and couldn't get myself to love him despite trying to. I know I was selfish and opened up to him but he insisted that I would warm up to him with time and grow to love him.

The relationship was far from perfect, I was in it solely for what I benefited but we weren't compatible and it was from one issue to another. We were always at logger heads all the time. He insults me and my family at any given opportunity and talks down on me using secrets I shared with him as leverage each time we quarrel. He shredded my self-esteem.

He was insecure and attacked my male friends at any given opportunity including my lecturers, he would access my social media accounts and send derogatory message to any male contact he feels is making a pass at me.
All these attitudes made me fed up with him and I decided to breakup for good.

Early this year I met a guy online and somehow we vibed together quickly, we met physically for the first time and it felt like we've known for ages. Everything moved so quickly with this new guy that I started developing serious feelings for him. I was scared because I never knew I would feel something like that again after I broke up with my other ex.

This new guy makes me happy and treats me like a woman, anytime spent with him is always memorable and I don't feel like leaving. The chemistry that we share is super strong and everything seems so perfect.

Now to my issue, this new guy is a fresh graduate and not yet stable, I don't have issues with his financial status because he made me realize a Lady can actually be happy without money being thrown at her. But I'm still scared of going all full into the relationship he might go for service and never come back to me. I don't just want a repeat of my previous relationship that got shattered after my ex relocated.

On the other hand, the other guy is hell bent on getting me back, he's been pleading and sending people to beg me even though I told him I've moved on and has even had sex with the new guy but he still wants me back.

I'm confused and don't know what to do, my heart is with the new guy but the other guy is making things so difficult for me and almost driving me insane. Can I still grow to love him?? Though I've been unable to after almost a year.

Should move on with the new guy?? I've known him for barely two months but it seems I've known him for ages, my feelings are exploding and I can hardly control them which is making me scared.

I'm sorry for the long epistle but I had to let it all out.
Please advice me.
Girl, how old are you?
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by mudiana(m): 10:14am On Mar 09, 2022
Ajiswaggs:
Go back to ur ex boyfriend, he has realized his mistakes and ready to change for good. Don't loose a good man because of little attitudes u can talk to him to change. Believe me no man is perfect out there, you will surely face another issue worser than the previous. Erase the new bf and develop the love for ur current guy.
u re the worse adviser on planet earth. You are terrible at relationship. I guess u bully ur partner too and mk life unbearable for ur partner.

2 Likes

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by adenodi002(m): 10:14am On Mar 09, 2022
Nobody knows person husband/wife for know will just dey Bleep ourself
Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by Basicend: 10:15am On Mar 09, 2022
tiswell:
Guys,marry a virgin and save yourself a whole lot if rubbish sad

I beg bro.where dem dey get all those virgins?

Most Naija girls from age 16 have become contractors.

2 Likes

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by tiswell(m): 10:19am On Mar 09, 2022
Basicend:


I beg bro.where dem dey get all those virgins?

Most Naija girls from age 16 have become contractors.
look well comrade,virgins dey ya neighborhood sef.


Don't ever wife a hoe,cos you might have shortened ya lifespan by half,if you do.


shalom!

2 Likes

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by esthel(f): 10:28am On Mar 09, 2022
They will just insult you here

1 Like

Re: I'm Torn Between My Ex And New Boyfriend by PrinceMajestic: 10:31am On Mar 09, 2022
Naija girls don fhuck their life scatter. This one is even shamelessly writing about how 2 dickks have fhucked her brain into confusion, for me it's No Virgin No marriage policy. I can't marry the sexual remnants and public toilet Nigeria girls

1 Like

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