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About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria - Family (7) - Nairaland

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Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Anonymoususher: 3:40pm On May 03, 2022
oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

Mtchwww
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Golan007: 3:41pm On May 03, 2022
oldienavie:

Reading your post, it appears the Nigerian educational system is worse than I thought it was.
Your response is not just disjointed but fails to convey any meaningful message.
The fact that something does not bother you does not mean it doesn't bother other people, learn to think outside of your own mindset and understand that people are different.

Also, learn to respond to people in a more decent and respectful way, don't just type anything because you are on the internet.

Been in your shoes man.

Don't risk it.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by placeofallure(f): 3:42pm On May 03, 2022
oldienavie:

I know it sounds ridiculous, but the phobia is strong. I know how hard it is to come across good girls in Nigeria, at the same time the thought of being on that road, especially when it's time to bring my family on that journey kinda scares me.

It's your call to make at the end of the day. It's going to be a scale of preference kind of thing. Which one sits well with you more? The girl? Your phobia? Which one can be foregone?

The culture is, as the man, you have to go see your intended in-laws, no matter where they are, even if they live in a cave and you live in Aso rock.

The roads are bad, kidnappers are rife, your fears are valid.
Good girls are fast going into extinction too.

One last word. A bonus tip actually. Are you sure she's really a good girl? She could be forming good because of the prospects. If you ask me, 3 months is too short a period to adjudge anyone.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by harizonal123(m): 3:44pm On May 03, 2022
oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.
.

When you are in love you grow wings and fly. Love over comes every obstacle but on the other hand if you are in doubt pls abandon mission sir. Me as a Delta guy u tell me say come collect ojo free for kaduna. I go tell u say take nor worry, God will provide another one

1 Like

Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by HeavenShield: 3:46pm On May 03, 2022
That is not an issue at all.

There are boyz ready to provide escorts and cover. Just keeps raw bundles and drinks that will knock their brains out.

Instruct all your families that they will be going on convoys.

Finally, with God all things are possible, have faith, When you have money, you enjoy Nigeria.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Richy4(m): 3:48pm On May 03, 2022
Slimdan360:

Out of all the phobias I've seen, never have I come across "phobia of travelling in Nigeria roads". In conclusion, you are only constituting nuisance in a cyber space, get off nairaland and go get a life
Hodophobia is real.. embarassed
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by oladipuposadeeq(m): 3:50pm On May 03, 2022
superCleanworks:


You don't have ballz to make the trip.
You also don't have the ballz to open your mouth and tell her to shift. You don't have ballz to talk.

Tomorrow if they call men to come out you too will carry your two left feet and come out.
what the feck shocked
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by samsard(m): 3:53pm On May 03, 2022
Ebubu:


Excellent submission. Love should overcome fear, unless OP doesn’t love the lady but just marrying for marriage sake or because it is time to marry sake. Ordinarily love would push you to act beyond that fear. Love breaks barriers or fears, oldienavie.
Love will not make me travel to some places when it's a high risk for kidnapping. It's only people who have not experienced the horrors that think carrying a whole family through a danger zone should be written off because of emotions.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Oju4190: 3:54pm On May 03, 2022
Good girls are scarce in Nigeria.....if I see one I can even go to sambisa forest upandan if her parents reside dere.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Slimdan360: 3:56pm On May 03, 2022
Richy4:

Hodophobia is real.. embarassed
If hodophobia is an extreme fear of travelling then what is phobia of travelling in Nigeria roads called? undecided
I'm not angry because the op said he's scared of travelling, I'm angry because he specified the place (Nigeria) this fear comes up which makes me feel the op is crazy
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Pootle: 3:57pm On May 03, 2022
your issue no get weight...shift make we hear the next person
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Legendoo: 3:59pm On May 03, 2022
Well just tell her simple.

You're sure she's a virgin and a good girl ABI she run am for you? How are you so sure?

If it's true and you no do again abeg send her details, I have guys abroad looking for good wives.

In a country like Nigeria where oloshio na them plenty pass , virginity and character will have to be put has utmost priority.

Send her digits ..I'm serious.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by sharpwriter(m): 3:59pm On May 03, 2022
oldienavie:

Ondo State.

Lol... Where you yourself dey come from? Let me give you an infamous advice if you still dey fear.

Continuing nourishing the relationship, and stall the marriage planning till Buhari is out of office grin

Having your wedding by next year ending shouldn't be a problem, or is it? Na fast fast bá? grin
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by virginchaser(m): 4:00pm On May 03, 2022
OP, it's logical anyway. I travel that road from Lagos often and even go further as far as Rivers and Akwa Ibom many times by his grace. There is this yoruba girl that is from Ondo town born and grew up in USA but always comes around Lagos on business trip. Her parents relocated from USA back to Ondo town. We encouraged her to visit them. She did and made it her routine whenever she enter Nigeria. I prefer passing through Ore. Do not drive early or late in the evening. Pray for mercy and save journey.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by wonlasewonimi: 4:01pm On May 03, 2022
CountVersailles:

You said it better. Nigerians just don't think rationally. That's also why the country is in the mess it is, no doubt. Dude's fears are legit. But it seems no one, at least not many people, care about the several unavoidable deaths on Nigerian roads daily. They believe it will never happen to them until it does.

Life is meaningless to them. They see it as normal for 200 people to be killed in a single day. There are still over 60 people in kidnappers den that were traveling on that ill-fated train on which that doctor was killed. No inquiry, nothing. Life goes on for them. @OP just look out for youself and don't travel anywhere!

2 Likes

Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by opera1(m): 4:02pm On May 03, 2022
oldienavie:

Finally someone that understands my thoughts.
I have googled Ondo State tire and the kind of reports I see are very distressing, the city is 1 hour away from Akure that has an airport and looking up Akure by air, it does seem like no airline goes to that place.

I spent hours searching for flights to Akure didn't see any.

Ofcourse I do love her and value her, but like you have said, living in Nigeria is like being in an active war zone and the risk of being on that stretch of road for 4 hours to and fro and about 3 times thats really making me feel discouraged.



If you truly love her as you portrait,....... You won't be thinking of breaking up just because of distance.
Your journey to her place is once in a while and the security situation is a general issue.
If you love her and she's OK for you, don't break up, God will surely go with you.

My family travels by road from Akure to Jo's for introduction and engagement and they all return safely.

Akure Airport is working if you can't travel on land.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by samsard(m): 4:02pm On May 03, 2022
Ishilove:

Well done. So those of us living and thriving in Nigeria are what? Aliens from another solar system? You stay in the west and confidently declare a whole country an active war zone because of misrepresentation from the media.

You know what you are? You are what the white people call a coon.
Are you for real? Nigeria is an active war zone, oga. We have two terror groups,, bandits in over 6 states that the military are finding it hard to curtail, kidnappers even in the town I reside,, herdsmen slaughtering people for fun, even in my own village, UGM in the East that even killed Dora Akunyili's husband,, ritualists etc. Every state I have close people living in there's been recurring violent attacks of some kind.
Personally, I'm afraid of embarking on any journey that is not absolutely necessary because all routes experience regular attacks.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by medriano: 4:03pm On May 03, 2022
blazingblender:
My friend go and sit down
Your girlfriend is the one who doesn't deserve you sef
You are having phobia travelling on Nigeria road
Asif the country you live in you guys fly around..
Secondly I believe the abroad you are even talking about may be one of this closeby African countries like Cotonou
Si if you don't come back home where do u wanna retire??
Or you think we living here are asshol*$?

��
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by bepositive11: 4:06pm On May 03, 2022
Don't mind all these people shaming you. Your fear is real

I don't know which country you're staying in but there was a story about a man who came to visit Nigeria from USA. Some close allies conived with kidnappers to target him. At the end, he was shot to death. And it was a head shot. Very tragic.

As for your situation, my question is why is she still staying there if she nows that it's not safe? Why can't she move to a safer area

My final advice to you is trust your gut. If it says don't go, don't go. All these people saying that good people are rare say so because they are not good people. As long as you are a good person, you will continue to attract good people into your life.

But please, don't confuse codependency with being good. A lot of people make that mistake and regret it after marriage and kids

oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

1 Like

Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by medriano: 4:06pm On May 03, 2022
Just let that good girl be oga. Are you the first to have phobia for Nigerian roads? Go ahead abfmarry from your city.
Some of you are lucky to meet good and decent women but cos of one selfish/senseless reason, you dump them and go for the one that will eventually tear you to shreds.
Very annoying and selfish human being.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Mikeinstanta123: 4:07pm On May 03, 2022
Pls gimme her number. I want to ask her sth
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Richy4(m): 4:10pm On May 03, 2022
Slimdan360:

If hodophobia is an extreme fear of travelling then what is phobia of travelling in Nigeria roads called? undecided
I'm not angry because the op said he's scared of travelling, I'm angry because he specified the place (Nigeria) this fear comes up which makes me feel the op is crazy

The reason why he specifically mentioned Nigerian road was because his object of interest resides in Nigeria... And he has to travel in other to meet her...

Will it be better if he says that his girlfriend resides in Ghanaian remote area and he doesn't want to travel there because of kidnappers and high way robbers?

It's not really easy for men to admit their fears..He put his fears out there, We don't really have to be dismissive about those fears.. it's genuine and he is seeking for a way to go around it...

1 Like

Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by pafo(m): 4:10pm On May 03, 2022
I understand you are learned and will like to be addressed in such manner but some phobias just doesn't make sense and it will rightly be pointed out to you in Nigeria because we say it as it is. How will you intend to break up with a human being because you are afraid of travelling on Noverian roads?

Just do the maths on how many people are kidnapped daily on that route vs the total number of people travelling that route daily and you'll see one has to be very unlucky to be part of the kidnapped victims.

The probability of you or family being kidnapped is next to nothing and that should be enough for you if truly you like the girl.

Just a quick thought; what will happen if you get threatened over the girl then? Pretty sure you'll run off scared o.

Just man up and to perform her marital rites and enjoy your marriage man. Peace!
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Dmacqh(m): 4:11pm On May 03, 2022
When I read comments on nairaland , I think Nigeria shouldn’t be in problem. Every problem brought here got solutions. God bless us.
Hope @op, you haven’t disvirgined her ? I don’t want to think outside what you wrote , because obviously you hid a lot of things if this story is true .
Is there another girl on standby ? Is your family against the marriage?
Insecurity isn’t excuse . People living in abroad marry.
You can do every rite online . I think apart from the day the dowry is paid , no other day is your presence or family presence obligatory.
Rats entered Nigeria Presidency office , so one is safer . Our President doesn’t trust Aso Rock world class medical hospital for aches , so there’s no trust in Nigeria.
Nah person wey get money dey fear. 3 months dating , and you are considering marriage ?
So there’s a Virgin girl of 18yrs and above in Nigeria and I’m not aware , I think I need to buckle up . She has escaped my whim. We are virginbreakers . #Team_chop_rod.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Abfinest007(m): 4:12pm On May 03, 2022
oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.
sorry if this seems as insult but I must air my view,u are selfish man!!
U think it easy to find a good Nigeria girl
Travel by air shekina.



If u leave that girl I go swear for u ooo
Abeg marry her .48k won't kill u if u travel by air
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Bbbw: 4:14pm On May 03, 2022
You are yet to reveal why you want to breakup with her

I think it’s sex she won’t let you hit it

Well go and find someone else and enjoy your life
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by seunlizy(f): 4:15pm On May 03, 2022
blazingblender:
My friend go and sit down
Your girlfriend is the one who doesn't deserve you sef
You are having phobia travelling on Nigeria road
Asif the country you live in you guys fly around..
Secondly I believe the abroad you are even talking about may be one of this closeby African countries like Cotonou
Si if you don't come back home where do u wanna retire??
Or you think we living here are asshol*$?

grin grin grin grin grin grin u no get joy ooo see the way u finished the op.

Cotonou or ghana,
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Ezemeiyogu(m): 4:17pm On May 03, 2022
oldienavie:
So I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and she is perfect, actually she is a virgin, well behaved and very respectful. The relationship is going very fine but I am starting to really think deeply and I may just break up.
Why ? I have lived abroad for a while and do have a very serious phobia for travelling on Nigerian roads, her parents are a journey of 4 hours from where I am and I understand the area is rife with kidnapping and robbery of all sorts.

I find myself obsessing over having to make that trip to her parents place and also have my family embark on that journey and I always shudder at the thought of it.

I am seriously considering breaking up with her and looking for a lady whoose parents are here in the same city I reside, cos one of the things that gives me serious head ache is travelling on Nigerian roads.

Since I got back to Nigeria I have not travelled outside of the city that I am and it is because of how serious that phobia is.

But how do I tell her I am breaking up with her for this reason, it sounds very trivial but its a serious issue for me.

This is so funny. You re leaving a girl because u can't travel that short distance...
Pls, leave the girl, u will infect her with undue fear.

Inukwa fear!
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by EjaikreTheViper(f): 4:19pm On May 03, 2022
blazingblender:
don't bring anything on the internet and expect to be praised ..
And you are to immature for thinking of leaving a girl cus she wanna visit her home base ..

1 Like

Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by Slimdan360: 4:20pm On May 03, 2022
Richy4:


The reason why he specifically mentioned Nigerian road was because his object of interest resides in Nigeria... And he has to travel in other to meet her...

Will it be better if he says that his girlfriend resides in Ghanaian remote area and he doesn't want to travel there because of kidnappers and high way robbers?

It's not really easy for men to admit their fears..He put his fears out there, We don't really have to be dismissive about those fears.. it's genuine and he is seeking for a way to go around it...
My question is what is so bad about Nigerian roads that would make op to develop phobia. Don't say kidnapping and terrorism cos a very large extent, these problems are not peculiar to Nigeria alone.
Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by EjaikreTheViper(f): 4:21pm On May 03, 2022
blazingblender:
My friend go and sit down
Your girlfriend is the one who doesn't deserve you sef
You are having phobia travelling on Nigeria road
Asif the country you live in you guys fly around..
Secondly I believe the abroad you are even talking about may be one of this closeby African countries like Cotonou
Si if you don't come back home where do u wanna retire??
Or you think we living here are asshol*$?

1 Like

Re: About To Break Up With My Girlfriend Because Of Risk Of Travelling In Nigeria by femzy190: 4:21pm On May 03, 2022
muyico:
Ma totally different.north isnt a best route now
Y not go by flight. let your family also book a flight if they want to follow u along

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