Oga, finish your mum's building first. She is the utmost reason behind ur financial stability. And you're one the reasons why she couldn't complete her building. She never ask nairalanders before sending u to school. Therefore; I suggest you should do that for her first.

UncleKoboko:

Shut up weyrey.

Let's analyze you for example.

HOW MANY BOYFRIENDS HAVE YOU HAD?
COMPARE THE NUMBER WITH YOUR BODYCOUNT AND TELL ME IF YOU'RE NOT A SHAMELESS DIRTY WHORÈ OR NOT.

Just imagine the moniker 'unclekobokobo' calling a woman a liability. As a man thinketh in his heart, so he is.

churro:


Go to your mum. Buy the property from her BUT don't tell anyone. None of you should. Build it and let her live in it. Everyone will congratulate her and congratulate you for building for her. She will be immensely happy and both of you will be fulfilled. Anytime God calls her home, the house is yours and no one will be able to dispute it with you.

Buy wetin? LoL. They will kill him physically, spirituality, legally, etc.
Best bet is to buy land somewhere else and build for her, knowing fully well that he owns both land and house.

UncleKoboko:

Shut up and answer the question weyrey.

Husband kee you there
Who go marry this one?
Probably a demented omega-male fool.
Tufai!

Ikwakwakwa...I go dey press Una neck ! You think every married woman will always be tattered or old . Abeg na money I dey chop, I no kill person

Barrister026:
Hello all,

This is difficult situation for me, my mom's house has been left uncompleted since 2014 just the foundation and probably 2couch were placed ontop since then it's been there because she had to send my siblings and I to higher institution. Now am of age, doing quite well for myself. I think am finally ready to build a house, was thinking about getting a land 100 by 50 and raise 5 bedroom flats... but on the other hand that my mom's building had been left uncompleted since it's a family land, relatives are starting to say somethings and sometimes I could see the shame on my mom's face when she goes to her family compound. Almost every months they always call her to come clear it that it has become harbor for snakes and pests. So I thought why don't I just complete it for her first.


The issue here Is immediately I told my fiancee she said it's a good idea but kicked against it. That I should build mine first, before completing my mom's. That it can wait.

I also confided in a friend of mine, he said almost same thing, that my thing is different from our own. Saying am not the only one my mom gave birth to, if I complete it now I should be ready to share it with my siblings no matter what when the time comes.

I'm confused and need advice on the step to take. I would really want to complete that house for my mom I Know it would mean a lot to her..I'm really confused.

One way or the other somebody has to develop it, if I the first son don't do it now that am financially stable. Then my younger bro will do it, trust me it won't make sense that way that's just my fear.

Guess you are a learned colleague. In my case I later found out the blessings of one's parents especially a mother's keeps you ahead of your siblings. Mine is a testimony. Just use pocket friendly building materials and build her's first, you will thank me later. Good if your siblings contribute, no problem if they don't

Yours first, then your mom's. Every mother is always happy about her child's achievement...... When you finish yours mom will be happy then finish hers it will be double happiness. I know if the money is more than enough, just do both at once

Barrister026:
Hello all,

This is difficult situation for me, my mom's house has been left uncompleted since 2014 just the foundation and probably 2couch were placed ontop since then it's been there because she had to send my siblings and I to higher institution. Now am of age, doing quite well for myself. I think am finally ready to build a house, was thinking about getting a land 100 by 50 and raise 5 bedroom flats... but on the other hand that my mom's building had been left uncompleted since it's a family land, relatives are starting to say somethings and sometimes I could see the shame on my mom's face when she goes to her family compound. Almost every months they always call her to come clear it that it has become harbor for snakes and pests. So I thought why don't I just complete it for her first.


The issue here Is immediately I told my fiancee she said it's a good idea but kicked against it. That I should build mine first, before completing my mom's. That it can wait.

I also confided in a friend of mine, he said almost same thing, that my thing is different from our own. Saying am not the only one my mom gave birth to, if I complete it now I should be ready to share it with my siblings no matter what when the time comes.

I'm confused and need advice on the step to take. I would really want to complete that house for my mom I Know it would mean a lot to her..I'm really confused.

One way or the other somebody has to develop it, if I the first son don't do it now that am financially stable. Then my younger bro will do it, trust me it won't make sense that way that's just my fear.

Lol!!!!!
You are still a child!
Let me tell you my grandfather's story. Something very similar happened to him.
Before the story, let me just tell you to build your own house first! Charity begings at home. Even the Bible tell you to love others as yourself, not more than yourself. Of you build your mother's house first, know that you alone will not open it when she join her ancestors. You will have to share with others .
My grandfather's mother's father. That is my paternal great great grand father has a land he bought but didn't develop till he died. Her daughter wanted to develop the land but she was not capable. When her son (my grandfather) took her to the land he bought and wanted to develop, she was angry. That her father's land is there undeveloped, and he wanted to build in another place. To placate her, he abandoned his land and developed his grandfather's land. Nobody said anything when he was building, but immediately he finished, they called family meeting. They started by thanking him for developing the land and then told him he is not the only owner. At the end, he was left with 1 room while the others were shared. As the land belongs to all the children of the grandfather and not only his mother. He never built the land he bought!
Is that the same thing you want to put yourself through because of emotion? Lol!!!
Better listen to your wife!

Barrister026:
Hello all,

This is difficult situation for me, my mom's house has been left uncompleted since 2014 just the foundation and probably 2couch were placed ontop since then it's been there because she had to send my siblings and I to higher institution. Now am of age, doing quite well for myself. I think am finally ready to build a house, was thinking about getting a land 100 by 50 and raise 5 bedroom flats... but on the other hand that my mom's building had been left uncompleted since it's a family land, relatives are starting to say somethings and sometimes I could see the shame on my mom's face when she goes to her family compound. Almost every months they always call her to come clear it that it has become harbor for snakes and pests. So I thought why don't I just complete it for her first.


The issue here Is immediately I told my fiancee she said it's a good idea but kicked against it. That I should build mine first, before completing my mom's. That it can wait.

I also confided in a friend of mine, he said almost same thing, that my thing is different from our own. Saying am not the only one my mom gave birth to, if I complete it now I should be ready to share it with my siblings no matter what when the time comes.

I'm confused and need advice on the step to take. I would really want to complete that house for my mom I Know it would mean a lot to her..I'm really confused.

One way or the other somebody has to develop it, if I the first son don't do it now that am financially stable. Then my younger bro will do it, trust me it won't make sense that way that's just my fear.

This is a dicey situation. And if you choose either, you'll not feel completely fulfilled. I'll advise you do both but prioritize one. Compulsorily, do buy your own land. Then you can start working on your mum's. These beloved parents of ours don't give notice. Mine didn't. I was barely settled when I lost both. I know all the plans I had for my mum especially. My consolation was that at every stage even while I was a still a student, I always got her something memorable. I denied myself of certain things just to make her smile because she deserved it. You know that kind of awesome sacrificial mama.

The point is, do both simultaneously but prioritize hers. Once your younger siblings are able to, they will support you and make the work go faster. It's your family house, it belongs to all of you so it will still remain your property. May God fill you with wisdom to go about this in the best possible way that will be beneficial to all involved. Cheers.

Beremx:
I hope you turn your LIKES into money. Not every man will condone the rubbish you always post. May you rest In Jesus Name

Ebere, you have a spiritual problem... The earlier you seek help, the better for you.

So, advising my fellow man not to take family advice from a girlfriend is what you call rubbish?

Being financially stable and able to project future, I urge you to complete your mother's house, there are blessings attached. From experience, I did similar thing and today am living in MY house. Either ways the house (s) belong to you. Nothing bad in building house for your parents as it rain blessings.

Ninisun:




Ikwakwakwa...I go dey press Una neck ! You think every married woman will always be tattered or old . Abeg na money I dey chop, I no kill person

Still waiting for your answer hypocrite
If dem carry u go Okija shrine now say make you swear say various men were not fuckîng you when you and your so-called husband was dating or if no man as climbed on top of you in this your So-called marriage now, up go fit swear make thunder no fire you?
Oh low foe

@Op, both are great choices but do whichever that will leave you self fulfilled. In 2019 I was in ur shoe. We were just 2 sons my mum gave birth to. My elder brother raised me up to secondary sch level, and I had to fund mysef to the university. He had a house he was building before he died in 2013. So when I had my own money, I completed his first. The decision didn't go down so well with my wife but I had to, he was there for me. Now am on my own structure and am happy for d decision I took cos it made me fulfilled.

UncleKoboko:

Still waiting for your answer hypocrite
If dem carry u go Okija shrine now say make you swear say various men were not fuckîng you when you and your so-called husband was dating or if no man as climbed on top of you in this your So-called marriage now, up go fit swear make thunder no fire you?
Oh low foe

Ewu, I am ofu onye ofu amu for the past 9 years and still counting. Clap for me na, e no easy

Barrister026:

Boy call your English teacher and ask him the meaning of "fiancee and your normal "girlfriends"

I might even be talking with a teenager, your post is giving you out big time. You reason so immature that's what annoys me on every front page just to gather likes.

This my last response to you, I won't indulge any further.

Walk up to your mum or grown up sister and tell them that you sought advice on this issue from your so-called fiancee and also tell them her response. If you think you did the right thing then follow the directions above and see if your mum won't disown you and swear for that so-called fiancee.

Even your fiancée, will she accept a lady giving her son the advice she's giving you now?

Use your head here and stop being emotional. You shouldn't have asked your girlfriend advice on such a delicate issue that you won't be bold to openly share her advice with those the issue affects.

You can love her all you want and she can love you all you want but there should be boundaries so that you don't damage the fabrics of your relationship with her and your family.

Hope you won't be surprised if I told you she may have given that advice out of selfish reasons, pretending to have your best interest at heart while secretly looking to become the wife of a landlord and become a landlady and be able to raise my shoulders amongst my female friends.

There's a lot to say but he who wants to learn and he who wants to be wise will learn from few lines. Shalom

Zonefree:

Ebere, you have a spiritual problem... The earlier you seek help, the better for you.

So, advising my fellow man not to take family advice from a girlfriend is what you call rubbish?

That is total rubbish! Stop dating use.less women you can't seek opinions from.

LandMann:


Walk up to your mum or grown up sister and tell them that you sought advice on this issue from your so-called fiancee and also tell them her response. If you think you did the right thing then follow the directions above and see if your mum won't disown you and swear for that so-called fiancee.

Even your fiancée, will she accept a lady giving her son the advice she's giving you now?

Use your head here and stop being emotional. You shouldn't have asked your girlfriend advice on such a delicate issue that you won't be bold to openly share her advice with those the issue affects.

You can love her all you want and she can love you all you want but there should be boundaries so that you don't damage the fabrics of your relationship with her and your family.

Hope you won't be surprised if I told you she may have given that advice out of selfish reasons, pretending to have your best interest at heart while secretly looking to become the wife of a landlord and become a landlady and be able to raise my shoulders amongst my female friends.

There's a lot to say but he who wants to learn and he who wants to be wise will learn from few lines. Shalom

Na wa to you! Is the man not also going to live there after building his first? If they quit the relationship tomorrow, won't it be still his house

Barrister026:

I can't believe you actually booked space for this just to gather cheap likes

Don't you think it's better for me to confide in an olosho I sleep with, than to come online to ask random people who some are demented lunatics like you who find every loopholes to ridicule people online.
Kriss the whole nairaland knows you and your silly post, your Just a small boy who still feeds on mama thank you.

The funny thing is your mates are out there doing better things for themselves, winning daily.

Why give attention to a small boy with a degree in online buffoonery? He is a certified nuisance on this forum. Unfortunately he has followers who are as goatish as he is.

You were shocked by the ‘likes’ he pulled, weren’t you? It shows you the class of people who populate this forum.

Please don't make the mistake my father made.
he build his mothers House and was unable to build his on house. in later years when his Mom pass away, my fathers sister and her husband started war with my father over the house that he built for his mother, My father passed away in 2009 and we just left the house to his sister because we don't want war.

Barrister026:
Hello all,

This is difficult situation for me, my mom's house has been left uncompleted since 2014 just the foundation and probably 2couch were placed ontop since then it's been there because she had to send my siblings and I to higher institution. Now am of age, doing quite well for myself. I think am finally ready to build a house, was thinking about getting a land 100 by 50 and raise 5 bedroom flats... but on the other hand that my mom's building had been left uncompleted since it's a family land, relatives are starting to say somethings and sometimes I could see the shame on my mom's face when she goes to her family compound. Almost every months they always call her to come clear it that it has become harbor for snakes and pests. So I thought why don't I just complete it for her first.


The issue here Is immediately I told my fiancee she said it's a good idea but kicked against it. That I should build mine first, before completing my mom's. That it can wait.

I also confided in a friend of mine, he said almost same thing, that my thing is different from our own. Saying am not the only one my mom gave birth to, if I complete it now I should be ready to share it with my siblings no matter what when the time comes.

I'm confused and need advice on the step to take. I would really want to complete that house for my mom I Know it would mean a lot to her..I'm really confused.

One way or the other somebody has to develop it, if I the first son don't do it now that am financially stable. Then my younger bro will do it, trust me it won't make sense that way that's just my fear.

There is always what is referred to as family house.

Also, you made mention of making your mother happy.

Why not give her that joy, let her wake up every morning and say this is my house which my beloved son with whom, i am well pleased built for me.

You will be shocked that after the house warming, that bigger doors will open and your personal building will commence. The prayer of mothers, opens bigger doors.

Ninisun:



That is total rubbish! Stop dating use.less women you can't seek opinions from.

A girl deflowered by another man with noodles and eggs is who I should seek opinion from as regards my mum

You're sick!

Build your own first

Ninisun:




Abeg all the women in your life or have met, are they liabilities? Check yourself very very well. My mum built, my sisters are doing well and likewise me and so why always generalising?

The women I have met as girlfriends are all liabilities. Some of them don't want to work. They are looking for who to carry their burdens through marriage.

Barrister026:

One way or the other somebody has to develop it, if I the first son don't do it now that am financially stable. Then my younger bro will do it, trust me it won't make sense that way.
As for my mom she's aged already.

This is my little advice, I hope you have the time to read it...from what I understood from ur post is means ur mum's uncompleted house is in the village which equally makes it very important but not as important if it were to be in the city, reason is, city houses serve a lots of purposes, so I don't know if your family has a city house which I want to believe that you and the rest of the family members lives in city including ur mum, but be that as it may....why don't you do it this way since you are equally worried about completing ur mum's house before ur siblings looks into that direction in the future and as well removing the shame from ur mum's face concerning the old building lying abandoned....start up ur own first which is the most important, pursue it to a point where it will be remaining finishing, even though that stage takes a lots of money, then systematically start ur mum's own (not to complete it before ur own) at least doing some blocks works which is the most cheapest part in building, just to show how important ur mum and her well being is to you and also to send signals to ur younger siblings and others that you also care so much about ur mum, then come back to ur own building and complete it to ur taste then you can revisit ur mum's building once again and make the final impact with easy and peace of mind.....thank you

If you buy a land to build your own house without letting anyone know about it and later complete your mom’s building, will you die?

Barrister026:
we are 3 and yes am the eldest.

do you have female siblings

Ninisun:



That is total rubbish! Stop dating use.less women you can't seek opinions from.

Can you confide in your boyfriend before sending money to your mother?

Barrister026:

I understand, but they are still in school one about to round up though.

Nice submission sir

They will drag that house with you in the future so build your own first before completing that one

Kriss216:


You asked your girlfriend advice for something relating your mum

A girl you met recently will tell you what to do regarding your mum?


A girl you're sharing with different guys told you to discard your mum's happiness? What sort of men are we breeding these days?

He should build his house first to avoid problem that will come up in near future, his siblings will drag that house with him later

zedegit:


Can you confide in your boyfriend before sending money to your mother?

I confided in my husband even before we got married. Why should I even marry someone that I can't share my fears with or seek his opinions? Na wa..this is a public forum and so no need going into details.

OGA, WHEN YOUR MOTHER WANTED TO SEND YOU TO HIGHER INSTITUTION SHE DID NOT ASK NAIRALAND OR CALLED FOR FAMILY MEETING JUST TO DO THAT. NOW IS TIME TO MAKE HER PROUD LOOK AT WHAT YOU ARE DOING. THANK GOD, SHE SHA OTHER CHILDREN. JUST A LITTLE SACRIFICE FROM YOU.

Build yours first before you regret it later.I know of a man who used his mother's name to buy a land and built it all in d name that whenever he uses his name they collect the land.Now his immediate younger brother said it is a family house and nothing will change it.So wise up bro