@OP where did you grow up at?

and yes it is not unusual that the sister will show respect to her elder sibling by vacating the room. There's nothing wrong with that.

What other instances have occurred to make you think this way?

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chaircover:

^^^ LOL

My husband is much older than me too but that doesnt stop me from being "rude". He just jokingly tells me that "it is not your fault o! because we now sleep on the same bed you dont know your elders anymore" 

Like say, it is your fault.

Cheiii Men. . . .

...

chaircover:

Dont mind them o! The day I decide to stay downstairs and watch TV, 3 minutes later he will be the one calling

"oya wont you come to bed? , its late o! and you are going to work tomorrow so that you wont be tired in the morning"

. . . . . . as if that is the main reason that he wants me to come to bed 

I did not read that. .

I think we are married to the same man. Mine will offer a massage and if I refuse, would go ahead and give me a long epistle (according to Mr kadry) of his massaging hands and skills, how many women would line up to get a massage from him free of charge and how much wonders and miracle they perform. This is someone that I had to teach how to massage my back when  he almost broke my spinal cord all in the name of massaging

chaircover:

Dont mind them o! The day I decide to stay downstairs and watch TV, 3 minutes later he will be the one calling

"oya wont you come to bed? , its late o! and you are going to work tomorrow so that you wont be tired in the morning"

. . . . . . as if that is the main reason that he wants me to come to bed

jennykadry:

I did not read that. .

I think we are married to the same man. Mine will offer a massage and if I refuse, would go ahead and give me a long epistle (according to Mr kadry) of his massaging hands and skills, how many women would line up to get a massage from him free of charge and how much wonders and miracle they perform. This is someone that I had to teach how to massage my back when  he almost broke my spinal cord all in the name of massaging

erm. . . erm . . . Chaircover and Jennykadry, I have no clue what you two are talking about, are you talking about sex?

I don't think she is taking you for granted. As for swapping rooms you should have said no if you did not want it. My in laws gave up their bedroom for me ones when I went to Nigeria. I insisted that I could not do it but they really had no where else decent for me and the boys. For me it was a huge deal but for them it was nothing. As for the statement of you ordering her around like a housegirl I don't see how that would have anything to do with age. I don't think that there is a woman alive that has nto made the statement before. Sometimes we really do feel like husband and even children alike just assume that they have a live in maid because everything "automatically" fixes itself.

lol @ jenny and cc

Oam4j keep quiet diaaaa. We are toking about massage therapy

Malik, let me assure you that your wife's behavior has nothing to do with age. Women will always try to question your authority even if you are 10 years older than them.

The housegirl issue is a non issue. Women say worse all the time. Regarding having to sleep on the floor for two weeks, you simply need to tell your wife that it is unacceptable. Next time she need to tell you well in advance of her sister visiting, so you can adequately prepare the second room.

There is no big deal here,

Thanks every body!

proberly it might be the way you talked to her sometime people talk in a voice of comand that an asking one

as per visiting its no deal except on you moving rooms, its part of your fault you should have furnitured the room for visitors not for her sister but who ever come over a sleep over night or for days

it has nothing to do with age they just want to be in control and be the main man of the home.

Genius100:

Malik, let me assure you that your wife's behavior has nothing to do with age. Women will always try to question your authority even if you are 10 years older than them.

The housegirl issue is a non issue. Women say worse all the time. Regarding having to sleep on the floor for two weeks, you simply need to tell your wife that it is unacceptable. Next time she need to tell you well in advance of her sister visiting, so you can adequately prepare the second room.

There is no big deal here,

Listen guy, the problem you have is not with her remark about being a house whatever. The problem is why did she think it was acceptable for you to sleep on the floor foe 2 weeks? The answer is cos she knows that she can impose her will on you. Most people believe that this has to be done with a frown, some vixen do it with a smile. You are obviously not an alpha male personality otherwise she would not have even thought about it.
Your options? Be more asertive even if you have to do it with a smile?

OP your wife is just too damm old for you.The six years difference is just too much and yes its much obvious she"s taking advantage of you.

@Op

Sorry, Ndo!

Are you still sleeping on the floor or has she gone?

dont forget to flit the room so that you don't get stung by ant ok?

@Op you sound very much like the 'i'm the head of this house & I have my wife's permission to say so' kinda person.Yes she very much taking you for granted.It's not so much the fact that you had to vacate your room for her sis;professor or not,it's the fact that she did not divulge this information to you on time in a bid to give you ample time to make the necessary arrangements like buying a new bed etc,etc.
I'm sure your wife's sister must have made her feelings known about the visit & your wife must have waved it off with an 'it doesn't matter,he won't mind after all I run the place'.If you don't start putting your foot down now & stamping your authority,i'm sorry you don't have a prayer

when the issue is about Hussy and Wifey. . .there's always little we can say. . . .

But bro. . .you have to sit her down and dialogue!!!

You seem to be a silent sufferer, and i think you and your wife are not having a good enough communication or else, she (no matter her age) should have understood you well enough.
Why don't you talk this thing with her, let her know your concerns, your displeasures and opinions about things regarding these issues.

The issues were caused because of lack of communication between the 2 of u.

chaircover:

^^^ LOL

My husband is much older than me too but that doesnt stop me from being "rude". He just jokingly tells me that "it is not your fault o! because we now sleep on the same bed you dont know your elders anymore"

Ewww

Very funny sister in-law.

Allowing you to sleep on the floor for 2 weeks


Professor of medicine my  a.s.s, does she not know the back pains sleeping on the floor could cause.

Probably one of those egomaniac in-laws.

Dude, there's nothing wrong witrh your wife tho coz I guarantee you, some wives would actually sleep on the bed with the sister and let you sleep alone on the floor.

To each his own.

The only problem you got here is you packing "In" to your wife house.Indirectly she is telling you that the house belong to her.

Wow, in African setting, a woman move into a man's house not you moving into her house. I doubt if your name is on the lease. No matter the amount you contribute, you have little or no authority on her because she was already comfortable b4 you came in. You are just helping to pay her mortgage and after that she will surely kick you out one day. Gain your respect by getting a house and ask her to move in with you.

my chick is also older dan me, we jst fell in love 2 and I intend to marry her, they r more understanding younger gals in most cases
malik, u cld ve a younger wife and she wld say and act d same way n even giv u hell sef.
so its ok, just knw hw to tk control of thinks wen situation demands, u r doin good meen,
dnt mind those short sighted posters, they knw little abt life.
abt d sleepin tin, since her sister was stayin more dan a day, y didnt u guys get a mattress n Behind d room a little temporarily since u guys knew hw long she was stayin.
I wont ask u ur race, that a baseless question. peaceful marriages all over the word works on d universal principle of understanding n love. so pray always for ur maarriage.Its well wit u

@Poster, you could have bought a bed in the guest room,its not all that expensive at least ur in-law wouldn't hv displaced u from ur matrimonial room.

[size=40pt]DEAD MAN COMING THROUGH[/size]

well you have fallen a victim so bare the cross. when you saw her first she showed her good side and now she is showing her other side.

My question is Y didnt y'all furnish the other room for ur visitors? that woulda saved U this silly post. but then U guys slept under some spartan settings 4-2 weeks! thumbs up 2 u guys. . As 4 the age thing (shrugs) do y'thing bro. u know what u saw in her. Ivew seen guys who r 10 years older than their wives being controlled by the wives too so dont sweat it its not just u.

@poster
here my 2 cents
hope it helps

1.  one of the problems is that you don't really communicate enough,kos she would have told you that you were having a 2 week visitor.both of you then would have communicated on how to get a bed for the guest room and move the sister in law there the next day.
I hope  your wife gets to read this:
basically older or not,she must never displace her husband for  any sister,sister in law etc
the only person that can warrant such displeasure for her husband are parents
2.she needs to be very careful not to let her utterances or actions be misconceived especially in this situation of her age and the ownership of the house.she really needs to watch her words,this has caused so much havoc in many homes.
3.she sort of  belittled her self in the eyes of the sister in law kos I'm very much sure the same person wouldn't do this for her in manner,if there was no space in the house she should have put her up in a hotel.There had to be more respect for the man

you ,the poster on  the other hand,shouldn't hold back this displeasure in silence,speak with her, tell her how you felt and watch her reactions
don't get angry and if she is getting angry,end the conversation and let it go
you have made your point,and trust me she has heard (even if she pretends not to)
This might just be a one off ,so let it go
best of luck

@poster

Let me get it right with u, u said ur wife told u about her sisters coming 3days b4 her arrival, ok how much does a foam cost ? or did u sleep on the floor with a foam ?, just tell ur self the truth what could u have done if she told u 2weeks ago b4 her coming that u cannot do with the 3days or even during her 2weeks of stay ?

too much talk going on in here shes damn too old for him in the first place i guess u like them old nothing do u carry your cross my guy thats wat you signed up for.,