DOMESTIC VIOLENCE: The Negative Effects on a Child.

He cringed when he was told his role in a drama that will be performed in his school. His countenance should have been bright and full of excitement, since the school seldom carryout the aforementioned activity.
Bryan, happens to come from a family were domestic violence is at its peak. When he was told his role (as an angry father) in the upcoming drama, he shouted, “NO! I’m not going to act that part,” he went further to give his reasons for saying that, he said at home, his father always beats his mother at every little provocation. His teacher was stunned not just at his comments but when other pupils, were randomly talking about how their parents fought at home.

A home where domestic violence is the order of the day, will in no time affect a child negatively. Bryan felt so bad when he was told he was to act as an angry father who will be quarrelling with his wife and always making sure he is not happy with anything she does. Truth be told, what he sees at home is a fraction of the role he was supposed to play. After so many persuasion that his role was just for the drama, his teacher forthwith changed his role, the gloominess suddenly disappeared from his face, he was excited and felt so happy that his role has been changed.

The negative effects of domestic violence on a child, cannot be exaggerated. A home should be a place where children are taught the differences between nurture and torture. A home is where children are shown and given the nitty-gritties of a peaceful home.
As we browse through the internet, read through the dailies, etc., the rate at which domestic violence has risen is far beyond one could have ever imagined. What flummoxes me the most is, these set of couples who are perpetrators of domestic violence are not strangers, they agreed to come together and get married, why then the domestic violence? So many questions are on my mind when I ponder and wonder on why domestic violence is on the increase. It is detrimental for a child to be exposed to domestic violence at a very young age, the psychological trauma, the mental effects, inferiority complex, early exposure to other forms of violence are just few out of the numerous negative effects domestic violence will have on a child. Children need to be shown the path of love, the garden of joy, the field of hope, but it’s unfortunate that the opposite is what some of these children have been exposed to.

Parents should as much as possible say NO to domestic violence. Of a truth these parents are not above mistakes, no one is perfect, in fact they both noticed their imperfections and differences before they tied the knot. When there is love, there is forgiveness, when there is love, there is peace, when there is love, there is tolerance. A child who is shown the path of peace in the home will be pleased.

Nice thread OP.

The mods will not see this and put on front page o. Only snakes, Tonto stories.

Anyway, you too put the password for Lalasticlala

ON FP already threads like this get me thinking

Your points are fabulous! This also;

I heard of someone who loves getting intimate with married women. I was oppurtuned to speak with him one-on-one, his reason was rather heart-breaking: We all lived in one-room apartment: when my parents are 'doing it', the silent moans keep me awake all night wondering...This I believe was when I started getting interested in married women, at a very young age.

The sins of the parents can insidiously find its way into the heart of the children who later pass it on to their kids...How did many a youth get initiated to p*rn, sex etc? Through earelessness of parents, sometimes.

Parents should constantly begin to watch their actions in the presence of their children. Call it Pretence, I tag it Wisdom.

domestic violence is bad truly but make we talk true, mouth alone no fit make typical nigeria pikin hear word.....we can be so stubborn atimes that only a resetting slap can help, too much of everything is bad though so I think our parents should be more lenient in discipline.

thats why we have people suffering from psychotic break down because an average Nigerian either grew up in an unstable home, polygamous home or single parent or with an aunt or uncle

samueldinho:
DOMESTIC VIOLENCE: The Negative Effects on a Child.

He cringed when he was told his role in a drama that will be performed in his school. His countenance should have been bright and full of excitement, since the school seldom carryout the aforementioned activity.
Bryan, happens to come from a family were domestic violence is at its peak. When he was told his role (as an angry father) in the upcoming drama, he shouted, “NO! I’m not going to act that part,” he went further to give his reasons for saying that, he said at home, his father always beats his mother at every little provocation. His teacher was stunned not just at his comments but when other pupils, were randomly talking about how their parents fought at home.

A home where domestic violence is the order of the day, will in no time affect a child negatively. Bryan felt so bad when he was told he was to act as an angry father who will be quarrelling with his wife and always making sure he is not happy with anything she does. Truth be told, what he sees at home is a fraction of the role he was supposed to play. After so many persuasion that his role was just for the drama, his teacher forthwith changed his role, the gloominess suddenly disappeared from his face, he was excited and felt so happy that his role has been changed.

The negative effects of domestic violence on a child, cannot be exaggerated. A home should be a place where children are taught the differences between nurture and torture. A home is where children are shown and given the nitty-gritties of a peaceful home.
As we browse through the internet, read through the dailies, etc., the rate at which domestic violence has risen is far beyond one could have ever imagined. What flummoxes me the most is, these set of couples who are perpetrators of domestic violence are not strangers, they agreed to come together and get married, why then the domestic violence? So many questions are on my mind when I ponder and wonder on why domestic violence is on the increase. It is detrimental for a child to be exposed to domestic violence at a very young age, the psychological trauma, the mental effects, inferiority complex, early exposure to other forms of violence are just few out of the numerous negative effects domestic violence will have on a child. Children need to be shown the path of love, the garden of joy, the field of hope, but it’s unfortunate that the opposite is what some of these children have been exposed to.

Parents should as much as possible say NO to domestic violence. Of a truth these parents are not above mistakes, no one is perfect, in fact they both noticed their imperfections and differences before they tied the knot. When there is love, there is forgiveness, when there is love, there is peace, when there is love, there is tolerance. A child who is shown the path of peace in the home will be pleased.

God bless you

Story I heard**
A boy came to school and his teacher discovered he had not done his homework, when he was asked about it, He replied saying "is it not that stup.id woman" referring to his mother. His mother was invited immediately to resolve the matter and when the matter was placed before her, she said " is it because of this small matter you called me from work? He learnt it from his father, infact I am called worst" and she left.



As parents, I advice any quarrel should not be in front of kids, save generations by such. Please.


My 2 cents

when I tell people how much I hate my dad ,they think its discipline .I remember being told to sleep outside the house. when he called me when I was sleeping and could not answer ,when I was beaten to a pulp in front of my school with only bursars on ,for what he said I stole his money ,money that his colleague later informed him that he gave him,even with that he showed no remorse or even sorry .if i tell u my story this page will not contain it my heart burns with hatred every day ,I will never forgive him.

Beautiful piece!

It's a pity.




Only if parents can fight in the bedroom nd pretend in d kids presence.


Only if those screaming for divorce at d slightest misunderstanding, knws d impact it has on kids.


Only if these our trendy babymama knw wot they are doing to deir unborn child


It's just a pity

Insightful.

So sad we can't choose the family we will come from.

But, we can let our experience to impact positively on us.

May we never make the mistakes our parents made.


Say NO to domestic violence.!!

if only the child can accept Jesus Christ as his personal lord and saviour, the nature of christ will change things for better!

The OP wrote "negative effects ", is there any positive effect of domestic violence on a child

Another effect on a girl child is that she believes that being beaten is a normal as she grows up cos she has watched her father hit her mother several times. She begins to think it's a norm.

Domestic violence
I believe it comes in various forms, it might be physical, emotional or psychological
I have serious trust issues and I am completely emotionally detached because of what I have experienced in my family, I love my mum and I tolerate my dad, but watching people fail you time and time again cause serious issues
Even as I go into "relationships" the foundations have been established, no emotional shows, don't cry, don't feel, just robot your way through life
But the hole never fills
And being a man, something has to fill the holes in the heart
Enters vices....

When a child grows up in a home where violence and abuse are reoccurring, the male kids grow up to accept the fact it's okay to put your hands on another person.
They engage in fights in school....even outside school environment.

As adult males, they subconsciously derive the notion that it's OK to beat your girl /wife. They believe a woman who "truly" loves you will remain with you despite the bashing and panel beating of her by u.

They take no responsibility and have no sense of accountability. They do not like to be questioned about anything and resort to violence when queried.

For the ladies, it's the same, they slap their boyfriends/hubby's. Fight friends/in laws.....some others believe if a man doesn't beat you then he doesn't love u.
Some other females would see nothing wrong in that environment because they grew up in such and have become desensitised to it. They think it's the norm because they don't know any better.

Worst case scenario is you end up with kids who become saddist: they derive joy and happiness from inflicting pain and torture, physically and mentally on others because they grew up in a environment where dad was always hitting mum and then 2 days later mum is smiling and laughing with dad because she has forgiven him. So in their deranged mindset, they believe you have to pass thru pain in order to get joy

Greenbullet:
when I tell people how much I hate my dad ,they think its discipline .I remember being told to sleep outside the house. when he called me when I was sleeping and could not answer ,when I was beaten to a pulp in front of my school with only bursars on ,for what he said I stole his money ,money that his colleague later informed him that he gave him,even with that he showed no remorse or even sorry .if i tell u my story this page will not contain it my heart burns with hatred every day ,I will never forgive him.

You're punishing yourself by not letting go and forgiving him,you're caging yourself,and it will make you bitter,forgiving and letting go will do you a lot of good especially if you want to be a father too,or if you're not already one.

It's a good thing that you know he wronged you,but it will be good to talk to him about it,tell him how it marred you,how it affected/affects you,he probably has forgotten it all,some parents think that's the way,and so they believe they were/are doing the right thing. Talking about it with him will lighten your heart and make you feel better. Try it

Greenbullet:
when I tell people how much I hate my dad ,they think its discipline .I remember being told to sleep outside the house. when he called me when I was sleeping and could not answer ,when I was beaten to a pulp in front of my school with only bursars on ,for what he said I stole his money ,money that his colleague later informed him that he gave him,even with that he showed no remorse or even sorry .if i tell u my story this page will not contain it my heart burns with hatred every day ,I will never forgive him.

You are human, brother. You can not win the internal struggle on your own because you are an imperfect being & so is your own father. But you have a perfect father who has the power to right every wrong in your life including enabling you to find the place in your heart to forgive those who wronged you. And that person is Jesus Christ. All it will take you is to put your trust on him and everything will be fine. I have been in your shoes before & I know what it feels like, believe me.

Greenbullet:
when I tell people how much I hate my dad ,they think its discipline .I remember being told to sleep outside the house. when he called me when I was sleeping and could not answer ,when I was beaten to a pulp in front of my school with only bursars on ,for what he said I stole his money ,money that his colleague later informed him that he gave him,even with that he showed no remorse or even sorry .if i tell u my story this page will not contain it my heart burns with hatred every day ,I will never forgive him.

Man u gat forgive and forget he's ur dad for crying out loud

Nice piece.

Greenbullet:
when I tell people how much I hate my dad ,they think its discipline .I remember being told to sleep outside the house. when he called me when I was sleeping and could not answer ,when I was beaten to a pulp in front of my school with only bursars on ,for what he said I stole his money ,money that his colleague later informed him that he gave him,even with that he showed no remorse or even sorry .if i tell u my story this page will not contain it my heart burns with hatred every day ,I will never forgive him.

I know this will be really difficult for you to do but, my dear, you have to let go. It will be a gradual process but you must forgive him and let go so you can be free. Holding on to this pain and bitterness means you are still allowing him to have that hold over you. Letting go is like freeing yourself and gaining true victory from all the pains and anger you have built in yourself over the years. It also means he has no power over you anymore.

You will be happier and more at peace with yourself if you do this. Plus, you don't want to spend the rest of your life regretting that you did not forgive him when he eventually passes on.

Like someone suggested, you should have a long talk with him and explain how you feel about everything he did to you and how it has affected you. Do not expect any remorse from him because it may surprise you to know that he may not find anything wrong in all he did to you. To him, he was helping you to stay on track and that was all part of 'good home training'. Do not blame him if he is not sorry. You have no idea what his childhood was like. Just be prepared to forgive even when the 'I am sorry' is not forthcoming.

Domestic violence:hv a frd who told me dat. Her bf beats her and there is nothing wrong with it after all her dad beats her mum.she said we women need it atymes€...I just answered hmmmmmmmmmmm

It is well

Greenbullet:
when I tell people how much I hate my dad ,they think its discipline .I remember being told to sleep outside the house. when he called me when I was sleeping and could not answer ,when I was beaten to a pulp in front of my school with only bursars on ,for what he said I stole his money ,money that his colleague later informed him that he gave him,even with that he showed no remorse or even sorry .if i tell u my story this page will not contain it my heart burns with hatred every day ,I will never forgive him.

Never forgive! You are Joking Right?

Pls forgive him and have peace

ngoben:
Domestic violence:hv a frd who told me dat. Her bf beats her and there is nothing wrong with it after all her dad beats her mum.she said we women need it atymes€...I just answered hmmmmmmmmmmm

O dI egwu.

A man I once knew was admonished for hitting his pregnant wife. What he said was that he only did what everybody else does and it was called domestic violence, meaning that to him, what there was nothing wrong with what he did. This is the psychological effect of domestic violence on children and how they grow up with it to become adults.
That adult's parents stayed together so that their child will not be ruined by coming from a broken home. Ironically, he is already ruined by growing up inside that home.

PinketteDawn:


O dI egwu.

A man I once knew was admonished for hitting his pregnant wife. What he said was that he only did what everybody else does and it was called domestic violence, meaning that to him, what there was nothing wrong with what he did. This is the psychological effect of domestic violence on children and how they grow up with it to become adults.
That adult's parents stayed together so that their child will not be ruined by coming from a broken home. Ironically, he is already ruined by growing up inside that home.

for real cos who her elder sis married beats her n dey c it as normal

mysticgal:
Story I heard**
A boy came to school and his teacher discovered he had not done his homework, when he was asked about it, He replied saying "is it not that stup.id woman" referring to his mother. His mother was invited immediately to resolve the matter and when the matter was placed before her, she said " is it because of this small matter you called me from work? He learnt it from his father, infact I am called worst" and she left.



As parents, I advice any quarrel should not be in front of kids, save generations by such. Please.


My 2 cents

Good morning mysticgal.

Have u been able to check when you are schedule for the upcoming miss NL interview this week? Your date is Thursday 16th.

However why I am quoting you is to seek your consent if we can reschedule to tomorrow, Tuesday 14th June by 5pm.

We know this notice is short but I will appreciate if you will accept and honour it.

Waiting for your reply.

Thanks.

wristbangle:


Good morning mysticgal.

Have u been able to check when you are schedule for the upcoming miss NL interview this week? Your date is Thursday 16th.

However why I am quoting you is to seek your consent if we can reschedule to tomorrow, Tuesday 14th June by 5pm.

We know this notice is short but I will appreciate if you will accept and honour it.

Waiting for your reply.

Thanks.

Good morning.
It will be no problem at to the reschedule of the date but I am not comfortable with the time, I would appreciate if it is sifted to a much better time.

mysticgal:

Good morning.
It will be no problem at to the reschedule of the date but I am not comfortable with the time, I would appreciate if it is sifted to a much better time.

Okay What time do u want?

Dyt

I like your moniker. What does it mean?

Twaci:
Dyt

I like your moniker. What does it mean?

Its from my name
I took away the first, third and fifth letter of my name