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Issue Between My Mom And My Wife - Family - Nairaland

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Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Kswine(m): 11:57pm On Dec 24, 2022
Please what is this thing about mother in-law and daughter in-law that doesn’t make them get along?

Am in the middle an issue and don’t know how to proceed, let me tell you how it all started.

I’m the first born of my family, my father left us with my mom and marry another woman. To assist my mom I had to get a part time job while still in secondary school and this really affect my life.

Fast forward to 5 years ago I met my wife and we begin dating, during this time I won’t lie I saw some red flags about her family but was hoping things will change along the line. Her mom is a prophetess in a white garment church, she said my wife was her favorite in all her children. I didn’t count it because I see it as a normal thing for a mother to love her child endlessly.

To cut the long story short, last year my babe got pregnant and we decided to introduce both families and after that she will go stay with my mom for a while because am not always around and she need someone at home with her.

Now during this time mom do complain that she’s not free and do isolate herself from the rest of the family, on many occasion I’ll sit her down and we talk things out only for it to repeat itself.

On the second month of her stay with my mom I told her to go visit her mom maybe when she comes back things will be better, my wife got to her house and told her mom all sort of things and the next thing she and her mom started insulting my mom. All this thing happened around March this year and since then they have been begging because I told her nothing will make me marry her again.

Family meeting upon family meeting has been going on and at the end they want me to forgive her and bring her home which my mom insist.

Now I don’t want to look like a weak man because she and her family went too far by insulting someone I love and cherish and on the other hand I don’t want my daughter to grow up without a father figure in her life, so I don’t know what to do.

Please no insult

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Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by libertyfather(m): 12:02am On Dec 25, 2022
Listen to your mother

78 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by izzou(m): 12:13am On Dec 25, 2022
You have a great relationship with your mum, so i suggest you don't ruin it because of your girlfriend.

Separate both relationships; Be a loving son to your mum, and a loving boyfriend/babypapa to your girlfriend

We must not love each other for us to live in peace. Mutual respect and distance will do just fine

Don't let her stay with your mum again. Your mum does not deserve that kind of wahala

167 Likes 7 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Richy4(m): 12:23am On Dec 25, 2022
Kswine:


I told her nothing will make me marry her again.

other hand I don’t want my daughter to grow up without a father figure in her life, so I don’t know what to do.
Please no insult

You don't need advice buddy you know what to do already... Merry Christmas smiley

22 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by JeffreyJunior: 12:23am On Dec 25, 2022
Never you neglect a red flag, that's all I can advise you. It's better to be a happy baby daddy than be miserable married man.

By the way, who said you can't be a great father without marrying the mother of your child?

88 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Tokskob2008: 12:24am On Dec 25, 2022
For me o anything that makes my wife insults my mum then she automatically looses any atom of respect and love i have for her, I might forgive but can never forget it.

As long as your mum as forgiven them and insisted you bring her back then you should listen to her but your wife went too far by insulting her mother in-law, I'm sure if you were the one that did that to her mum she won't ever let it slide.

33 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by gaby(m): 12:29am On Dec 25, 2022
This Christmas, Seun and him Alibaba mods don decide say na family matters dem wan take hold us for work...no wahala

She did wrong by insulting your mum. I would have said to insult her mum too so you guys will be all squared and set to begin on a clean slate. But two wrongs can never and have never made a right.

Something tells me you have been following the NL kindergarten redpillers.

Give yourself sense and advise yourself by yourself.

8 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Weirdcamila: 12:56am On Dec 25, 2022
Don’t send your wife to stay with your mom.
This things are simple .
Women find it hard to cohabit

73 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by oz4real83(m): 1:50am On Dec 25, 2022
Weirdcamila:
Don’t send your wife to stay with your mom.
This things are simple .
Women find it hard to cohabit
without previously knowing each other, guys can still comfortably and peacefully live together, opposite is the case for women, even when they are blood related. Adult women must not be kept together for too long without a male supervision and intervention if it is possible, to avoid stories that touch undecided. What has happened before has the potential of rehappening again several times. Your baby mama and her mom disrespected your mom, despite their apologies, something can still trigger those insults later in the future. It is better to end the relationship now but make sure your child is well taken care of.

35 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by emerged01(m): 2:00am On Dec 25, 2022
If you are marrying a lady,consider her family o. No be only she u wan marry,u go marry her family join.
Na wahala go kill you for asking your wife to stay with your mum. No be all mother inlaws and daughters inlaws dey get along.

15 Likes 1 Share

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by pocohantas(f): 2:15am On Dec 25, 2022
Insulting your mother is an overkill. There are lines that should never be crossed. It is worse that she has the support of her mum. When a spouse is misbehaving and has the support of a parent, my dear forget it - they won’t change.

There is a saying that you can manage a bad spouse, but you can hardly ever manage bad in-laws. Couples fight all the time and makeup, but once it involves either in-laws, it becomes harder to fix as multiple egos are crushed and loyalty would be tested.

Hopefully you have a partner who understands peaceful co-parenting, which is most times not the case.

67 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Elitefosa: 2:37am On Dec 25, 2022
True

Richy4:


You don't need advice buddy you know what to do already... Merry Christmas smiley

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by kazyhm(m): 3:05am On Dec 25, 2022
What is the meaning of I don't want to look like a weak man ?

So is she and her mom a strong or weak women for what they did ?

Do what you gat to do and fvck off


The heading is misleading ........wife or pregnant galfriend ?

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Karleb(m): 3:18am On Dec 25, 2022
I'm interested in what you did after they insulted your mother.

It doesn't seem you took any reasonable action because if you did, na you suppose dey beg them now and not the other way around.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Mindlog: 4:07am On Dec 25, 2022
First of all......she is not your wife but a woman you share a child with.

Focus on healthy co-parenting.

16 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Nobody: 5:05am On Dec 25, 2022
Kswine:
Please what is this thing about mother in-law and daughter in-law that doesn’t make them get along?

Am in the middle an issue and don’t know how to proceed, let me tell you how it all started.

I’m the first born of my family, my father left us with my mom and marry another woman. To assist my mom I had to get a part time job while still in secondary school and this really affect my life.

Fast forward to 5 years ago I met my wife and we begin dating, during this time I won’t lie I saw some red flag about her family but was hoping things will change along the line. Her mom is a prophetess in a white garment church, she said my wife was her favorite in all her children. I didn’t count it because I see it has a normal thing for a mother to love her child endlessly. To cut the long story short, last year my babe got pregnant and we decided to introduce both families and after that she will go stay with my mom for a while because am not always around and she need someone at home with her. Now during this time mom do complain that she’s not free and do isolate herself from the rest of the family, on many occasion I’ll sit her down and we talk things out only for it to repeat itself. On the second month of her stay with my mom I told her to go visit her mom maybe when she come back things will be better, my wife got to her house and told her mom all sort of things and the next thing she and her mom started insulting my mom. All this thing happen around March this year and since then they have been begging because I told her nothing will make me marry her again. Family meeting upon family meeting has been going on and at the end they want me to forgive her and bring her home which my mom insist.

Now I don’t want to look like a weak man because she and her family went too far by insulting someone I love and cherish and on the other hand I don’t want my daughter to grow up without a father figure in her life, so I don’t know what to do.

Please no insult

Please listen to your mother and follow whatever she says. Love your woman like you love your unborn child.

This forum isn't qualified for this discuss.

1 Like

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Pastoshizzy(m): 5:42am On Dec 25, 2022
pocohantas:
When a spouse is misbehaving and has the support of a parent, my dear forget it - they won’t change.

There is a saying that you can manage a bad spouse, but you can hardly ever manage bad in-laws. Couples fight all the time and makeup, but once it involves either in-laws, it becomes harder to fix as multiple egos are crushed and loyalty would be tested.

Hopefully you have a partner who understands peaceful co-parenting, which is most times not the case.


...I cannot help but thank you for your wealth of experience. Trust overindulged adults to pout their mouths and hiss at their own peril.

2 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by verifiablefacts: 7:52am On Dec 25, 2022
Have this at the back of your mind,no one would ever love you more than your mother.

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Nicepoker(m): 8:05am On Dec 25, 2022
You saw red flags. But you ignored. grin

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by nicerod(m): 8:20am On Dec 25, 2022
grin grin

Sebi u have not paid the bride price


Red flag don't ignore


Let her stay with her mum

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by otipoju(m): 8:55am On Dec 25, 2022
pocohantas:
Insulting your mother is an overkill. There are lines that should never be crossed. It is worse that she has the support of her mum. When a spouse is misbehaving and has the support of a parent, my dear forget it - they won’t change.

There is a saying that you can manage a bad spouse, but you can hardly ever manage bad in-laws. Couples fight all the time and makeup, but once it involves either in-laws, it becomes harder to fix as multiple egos are crushed and loyalty would be tested.

Hopefully you have a partner who understands peaceful co-parenting, which is most times not the case.



True words. My inlaws crossed certain lines. They are still doing all they can by being extremely nice, but I am not fooled. Once bitten twice shy.

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by oldienavie: 8:57am On Dec 25, 2022
verifiablefacts:
Have this at the back of your mind,no one would ever love you more than your mother.
The women that give birth and sell their children are they not mothers ?
There are mothers that do not wish their children well.

Too much emotions has blinded many of you without reasoning.

And parents are not always right. The people stealing and looting in government are also parents to some people.

There are good mothers as well as there are bad ones.

17 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Gadafii: 9:21am On Dec 25, 2022
The moment you marry this one, she will be worse, marriage no be by force

Any girl wey get mind insult your mom in collaboration with her own mom, should never be married , she’s not well trained or she’s plainly dumb

Besides with the other red flags you saw, if you marry this one you are done for, you will look older than your age because you will always have to settle issues between her and your mom or between your mom and her mom

14 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by buygala(m): 11:31am On Dec 25, 2022
All long as nobody die and Police no involve, Op can keep his family problem to himself


Na insort dem insort your Mama.. Dem no kill am.. Your Mama sef don insult other people and dem no kill her...

Chill and try to impartially resolve the insulting crises instead of taking sides and giving us a one-sided story...


As you don talk your own side of the story, while we never hear Baby Mama and her Mama own, how you wan make we do? .. Abi make we carry gun give you make you kill dem?

10 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Highways: 11:31am On Dec 25, 2022
Ok
Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Wickedfacts: 11:32am On Dec 25, 2022
That you impregnated her doesn't mean you must marry her.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by AzuNas: 11:32am On Dec 25, 2022
Alright. . . . . . .Aje

Woman matter


Abeg
Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Wickedfacts: 11:32am On Dec 25, 2022
Where is her father in all this?

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by Nobody: 11:32am On Dec 25, 2022
One thing is to show maximum care, another thing is having zero tolerance for shii

Once ur mom and babe see sey u are not the type that do take shii from any fvcking person, dey will become closest pal..

It's not a thing u can just decide one day and say henceforth I don't take shii from anybody again, it's a thing they both have to see in u right from the scratch...

1 Like

Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by fitinwell: 11:33am On Dec 25, 2022
grin
Re: Issue Between My Mom And My Wife by iHart(m): 11:34am On Dec 25, 2022
I think your mistake was taking your "wife" to your mum without you being there to help her get acquainted and integrate with your family.

She was isolating herself because you were not there to give her confidence. Since you have not married her officially, there is this grieve inside your mum for bringing her that shame. Any little thing from your wife will trigger that grieve to manifest and now your wife have carried it to her mum. Now the two mums are having internal grievances, now if you marry her, this grievances may end in the grave.

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