Goodlady:

I made sense. You are the one that can't comprehend.
If I flip the table, I ll be fast in settling down. I never said the man shouldn't accommodate his sister. It should not be for long. And it's not good for relations to be visiting too much including wife's kins too.

So what will be your fate if you're unable to settle down fast as you'd wished?

Would it be nice if your siblings turn their back at you because there's a daughter of Jezebel somewhere that doesn't like family members (in this case you) visiting?

This female gender se, na God go help una!

Queengolden:
you sound like the sister

You seem like the girlfriend. 🧐

Ade3131:


So what will be your fate if you're unable to settle down fast as you'd wished?

Would it be nice if your siblings turn their back at you because there's a daughter of Jezebel somewhere that doesn't like family members (in this case you) visiting?

This female gender se, na God go help una!

Which kind of fate, I d rather fix that my husband to my taste than moving to relative houses to n from

Slime7:
Hi guys,
I need your advice on this. It is causing issues in my 2 years relationship.
I came to Lagos in 2018 after my NYSC. Prior to that, I had plans for my older sister to come stay with me, considering how difficult things were.
Note that my married eldest brother was in Lagos before then. I understand that maybe he needs his privacy, but he didn't help in any way (he didn't have to).
 
When I got the apartment, I met my girlfriend while she was serving in Lagos. My older sister has yet to move in with me, but I have mentioned to her not once but twice that she will soon come and live with me.
 
I will also like to mention that my elder sister was living with her boyfriend before I came to Lagos. This doesn't seem right to me or to her.
 
She moved in, and we were living together peacefully. Along the way, she broke up with her boyfriend. About 6 months later, she got into another relationship. The man seems interested in marrying her. And they were making plans for settling down. Unfortunately, she got pregnant out of wedlock for the man. She had to move in with the man.
 
Now this is where the issues begin. After a few months (after her childbirth), they always have issues. They go on and off. Two times they had issues; she carried her bag and came to my place. Two times it happened, and she stayed with me for not more than two months put together. This didn't go well with my girlfriend. She complained that my sister is always in the picture, and she doesn't like that.
 
The third time, the man abused my sister, and he beat her up. I went to the man's house with my "married eldest brother." We fought with the man and threatened to arrest him. He pleaded, plus the neighbors and the landlord too. That night, we took my sister away from him. My sister chose to stay at my place until she gets an apartment for herself and her kid.

This really annoyed my girlfriend. She always says things like, "My family does not respect me." That's why my sister can move in to my house knowing that I am in a relationship.
"Why does she like to stay with me and not my brother?" "Why do I have to always be the one to bear the burden?" Note that my sister works, and she can take care of herself and her kid. She just needed a place to stay until she got her own apartment.

She feared that my sister could just move in with her bags when we get married, which I have assured her is not possible.
She claims she likes her space and all. She claims she doesn't like the "on and off" as sometimes she may want to spend a "lone" time with me. Spend weekends... and this won't be possible when my sister is around.
She claims that she has never seen a scenario where an older sister with a kid is leaving with younger brother.
She always give instances where she has never seen guys in relationships allow their older sister to come stay with them.
She claimed that sometimes I should "man up" and say NO to her. 
 
Is she overreacting? What did I do wrong in all of this? Am I being manipulated? Is her anger justified?
 
N.B My sister has gotten a place for herself and has moved out.

She is not all that wrong cos some people don't like strangers around them. Just their nature.
In the other hand, you are not wrong supporting your sis. Family is everything. Never turn ur back against your family.
Finally, if that your girlfriend makes much noise about this, tell her that she is supposed to be in her father's house till you marry her, then she can authoritatively come live with you.
This is one of the ways to "Man Up" as she suggested.

Reinamaria:
Since your sister has gotten herself a place and moved out, what is the point of bringing the issue here?
What do you really want to know?
I honestly want to know.

He is a confused being....he just want to open his Yansh to the public.

Na so Ex wey wan come back dey yarn dust say she needs money of which I promised to give,later my elder sister called as well...do I decided to sort my sister first and later told the ex that I will find means of sorting her with time...she follow me fight for like a month saying why I go sort my sister before her.
Mr just reply her say families comes first,since then I know gree call her again.
Ladies and entitlement na 5 and 6

WHITELIGHTER:


If we are to follow this Ur analysis, isn't same going to happen to the OP gf? Isn't she brewing problem already with her lack of hospitality because of 'space'...?

Honestly you are right. He needs to study his girlfriend very well so as not to make the mistake of marrying a woman who is disrespectful and dramatic, na them plenty pass for this life now. Ungrateful, disrespectful and dramatic hungry hoes.

Guyyyyy!!!! Wtched for 30 minutes and I wanted to puke like DJ whatthafuck you doing...

iLoveYouToo:
I have no advise to give asides - Relationships suck, just go with the flow, if it fails, PULL OUT!




I’m watching BBTitans. Is this how boring clubbing is in SA? Boring AF. DJ is playing funeral tunes

If you want real advise here it is, RUN! Any woman in your life that cannot see your elder sister as her own is not worth it. If she being this selfish now as a girlfriend towards your flesh and blood, it will get worse after marriage. Stop investing in this relationship. Your sister is going through a tough time yet all your girlfriend can see is that her 'space' is being invaded even though it is your apartment not hers. Bro, stay clear of selfish self obsessed women.

For you to be concerned about this her attitude means it has really gotten to you.
This is a red flag and from her exhibitions there is a possibility she would restrict family members to visit you and you visiting them, all these may be coming from a place of insecurity on her part.
At a time like this she is suppose to be a bonding figure between you and your siblings and she is suppose to think of how to blend into your family instead is is already creating boundaries.

Well, it is said that he who the cap fits let him wear it, all men wears shoe but only the bearers knows where pinches.
Obviously, your sister feels comfortable with you from your narrative and as old Adage goes, Blood is thicker than water.

Reflect on this, would you want to enter a marriage with someone that would isolate you from your family or would you want to be in marriage with someone that would even strengthen the Bond you have with your family and hers as well. Your sincere answer to this question should be a beaming light in your path of conclusions.

Slime7:
Hi guys,
I need your advice on this. It is causing issues in my 2 years relationship.
I came to Lagos in 2018 after my NYSC. Prior to that, I had plans for my older sister to come stay with me, considering how difficult things were.
Note that my married eldest brother was in Lagos before then. I understand that maybe he needs his privacy, but he didn't help in any way (he didn't have to).
 
When I got the apartment, I met my girlfriend while she was serving in Lagos. My older sister has yet to move in with me, but I have mentioned to her not once but twice that she will soon come and live with me.
 
I will also like to mention that my elder sister was living with her boyfriend before I came to Lagos. This doesn't seem right to me or to her.
 
She moved in, and we were living together peacefully. Along the way, she broke up with her boyfriend. About 6 months later, she got into another relationship. The man seems interested in marrying her. And they were making plans for settling down. Unfortunately, she got pregnant out of wedlock for the man. She had to move in with the man.
 
Now this is where the issues begin. After a few months (after her childbirth), they always have issues. They go on and off. Two times they had issues; she carried her bag and came to my place. Two times it happened, and she stayed with me for not more than two months put together. This didn't go well with my girlfriend. She complained that my sister is always in the picture, and she doesn't like that.
 
The third time, the man abused my sister, and he beat her up. I went to the man's house with my "married eldest brother." We fought with the man and threatened to arrest him. He pleaded, plus the neighbors and the landlord too. That night, we took my sister away from him. My sister chose to stay at my place until she gets an apartment for herself and her kid.

This really annoyed my girlfriend. She always says things like, "My family does not respect me." That's why my sister can move in to my house knowing that I am in a relationship.
"Why does she like to stay with me and not my brother?" "Why do I have to always be the one to bear the burden?" Note that my sister works, and she can take care of herself and her kid. She just needed a place to stay until she got her own apartment.

She feared that my sister could just move in with her bags when we get married, which I have assured her is not possible.
She claims she likes her space and all. She claims she doesn't like the "on and off" as sometimes she may want to spend a "lone" time with me. Spend weekends... and this won't be possible when my sister is around.
She claims that she has never seen a scenario where an older sister with a kid is leaving with younger brother.
She always give instances where she has never seen guys in relationships allow their older sister to come stay with them.
She claimed that sometimes I should "man up" and say NO to her. 
 
Is she overreacting? What did I do wrong in all of this? Am I being manipulated? Is her anger justified?
 
N.B My sister has gotten a place for herself and has moved out.

Women are very manipulative.

Just bear that in mind in all your dealings with women.

Goodlady:

Oponu. Won't be surprised you reasoned that way.

O baje....
Shey emini oponu abi??

Goodlady:

This isn't toxicity. When you marry, your first priority is your wife just as your wife's priority is you the husband. Visitations and other family engagements must be limited to accommodate more of your wife's comfort. Except you are the super rich. Take for example, a man accommodating his kins in a room self contain apartment or room n parlour. There ll be clashes. But if the man built a mansion or at least 3 bedroom flat, everyone ll be in his/her room or quarters.
I m a realist and I avoid future issues as I sight them from infant.

In an ideal case, a man's priority should be his wife and a woman's priority should be her husband, but that is not the case in today's world.
In reality, Men put there wife as priority but women do not put their husband as priority.

Women are slefish creatures, they think of only what they can benefit from their husband, it's all about me me me for them, a woman would expect her husband to help her do house chores out of love but will never help the man pay the bills out of love, it's all one sided love for your gender, if you love me do this for me if you love me do that for me.

Why would I put a woman as my priority when I know that she is just there for personal interest, it's always men giving and women receiving, as soon as the giving stops she will run away, my family and kids are my priority, not my wife cus I know I'm not her priority.

Thermodynamics:


In an ideal case, a man's priority should be his wife and a woman's priority should be her husband, but that is not the case in today's world.
In reality, Men put there wife as priority but women do not put their husband as priority.

Women are slefish creatures, they think of only what they can benefit from their husband, it's all about me me me for them, a woman would expect her husband to help her do house chores out of love but will never help the man pay the bills out of love, it's all one sided love for your gender, if you love me do this for me if you love me do that for me.

Why would I put a woman as my priority when I know that she is just there for personal interest, it's always men giving and women receiving, as soon as the giving stops she will run away, my family and kids are my priority, not my wife cus I know I'm not her priority.

We also v condemned men. They are the most in Nigeria. Especially those that are deadbeat dads.
Anyways, we v lots of good women in Nigeria so I dunno where you are meeting those you know.

BigDick70inch:


O baje....
Shey emini oponu abi??

O balumo, Iwo ni supo arogo mu!

Your girlfriend is the type that wants full Privacy in marriage

Goodlady:

We also v condemned men. They are the most in Nigeria. Especially those that are deadbeat dads.
Anyways, we v lots of good women in Nigeria so I dunno where you are meeting those you know.

Good women ?
I can bet you that out of all the millions of women in Nigeria, if I randomly select one and chyke her today, within a week she will beg me for money. That's how bad it is, so where is the good woman?

Goodlady:
Justified. She's 100% justified.👍
You men don't realise that women don't like too much visiting from relatives. It brings unnecessary clashes. Moreso, will you lie that you don't v sex with your girlfriend? When your sister is around, will you be comfortable to sleep with her in her presence or you share different rooms?
Your sister is suffering from bad choice in her relationship life.
Assist your sister in getting apartment and settling down asap.
Your girlfriend is your future wife, you won't marry your sister.

Inasmuch as the sister may have made some bad choices that have come back to haunt now, she's still family. How will a girlfriend that's not even your blood and might break your heart tomorrow, tell you to render a help to your blood and you're here supporting that??
If you were the said sister I know you won't say this. Family over anyone, any day, anytime, twice on Sunday. A girlfriend can only start claiming territory in my house only when we're married, my mom and my family ahead of any damned girlfriend always.

Thermodynamics:


Good women ?
I can bet you that out of all the millions of women in Nigeria, if I randomly select one and chyke her today, within a week she will beg me for money. That's how bad it is, so where is the good woman?

You are dating people that's in need. Also, did your mom not ask your dad for money when she was dating him?

Goodlady:

You are dating people that's in need. Also, did your mom not ask your dad for money when she was dating him?

No, my mum is 70, she was born in the generation when women had real value in Nigeria, our mothers didn't beg men for money, they didn't dress naked, they don't twerk on Instagram, they married as virgins, infact most of them do their own business, my mum did garri market business and was feeding about 14 people all by herself for years, including children and her husband's relations.

But morden day women are not like that, they pride in begging for money, they are not beneficial to their husband or boyfriend yet they want want to detect what the husband should and should not do in his own house, they want to tell their husband how to spend his money

Morden day women be like, Hot, don't send your family money but send my parents and siblings money because you love me. Of course they won't say this directly but that what's in their mind.

Who your love help, love that only favours you all the time.

Thermodynamics:

No, my mum is 70, she was born in the generation when women had real value in Nigeria, our mothers didn't beg men for money, intact most of them do their own business, my mum did garri market business and was feeding about 14 people all by herself for years, including children and her husband's relations.

But morden day women are not like that, they pride in begging for money, they are not beneficial to their husband or boyfriend yet they want want to detect what the husband should and should not do in his own house, they want to tell their husband how to spend his money

Morden day women be like, horney, don't send your family money but send my parents and siblings money because you love me. Of course they won't say this directly but that what's in their mind.

Who your love help, love that only favours you all the time.

Lol.
Women of these days are very hardworking too. But the hardship of this generation is more. Like I said, you v been meeting those in dire need or those that are now accustomed to asking.

i don't think that gf of urs is different from bagablue blublu bulaba

Goodlady:

Lol.
Women of these days are very hardworking too. But the hardship of this generation is more. Like I said, you v been meeting those in dire need or those that are now accustomed to asking.

99.999999% of you are accustomed to begging even even when you have, a few are hard working but they will still beg men for money.

I have this friend who is seriously asking me for a relationship, she loves me like mad but I told her I'm already with someone else, this girl has a very big and classy business, I'm sure she has money more than me but as rich as she is, she still ask me for money, I don't understand your gender, I don't know if the money you get from men has a different way of sweetness. It's madness, this is why I've been with my current girlfriend since 2019, she hardly borthers me even though she is broke.

Thermodynamics:

99.999999% of you are accustomed to begging even even when you have, a few are hard working but they will still beg men for money.

I have this friend who is seriously asking me for a relationship, she loves me like mad but I told her I'm already with someone else, this girl has a very big and classy business, I'm sure she has money more than me but as rich as she is, she still ask me for money, I don't understand your gender, I don't know if the money you get from men has a different way of sweetness. It's madness, this is why I've been with my current girlfriend since 2019, she hardly borthers me even though she is broke.

Make I hear word. No sane woman ll be financially buoyant n leach on a man.

Goodlady:

Make I hear word. No sane woman ll be financially buoyant n leach on a man.

Story, begging is in your gender's nature, leaching is a culture to y'all, rich or poor.

Thermodynamics:

Story, begging is in your gender's nature, leaching is a culture to y'all, rich or poor.

Descendant of leach, you are sighted.
I can feed you.

Exactly.
Is she even supposed stay with a man that has not married her.
And she is tellingthe guy to chase his sister away.
Girls of these days don'thave atom of shameandego

sisisioge:
Why are you all living with people you're not married to biko? Is it a sort of tradition? Abeg, your gf should start by going home to her people first, once you guys get married, she can start claiming territory. Until then, she's the outsider!

U’ve seen all the read flags but you still need advise 😂

Goodlady:

Descendant of leach, you are sighted.
I can feed you.

Naa, you morden day women are nothing like our mothers. NOTHING. Our mothers didn't leach on men, but morden day women are all leaches, I know you know the truth, you just won't admit it.

Thermodynamics:


Naa, you morden day women are nothing like our mothers. NOTHING. Our mothers didn't leach on men, but morden day women are all leaches, I know you know the truth, you just won't admit it.

Marry your mom. Out of those that are bad eggs, there are millions of good ones like me. You wey be descendant of leach must be a bad husband sef

Goodlady:

She's a good gf

You're supporting her because she's your gender. Because you said you're a "goodlady" doesn't mean the said girl is one

caesymore:

.
 


Hmmmm. making relationship sound like a Job or I'm I the only one seeing it this way... you see why real Niggas run from all this relationship as it comes with a lot of burdens these days.

Na so one dey disturb me like yesterday say she loves me and would like to be my Wife I laugh tire ( the boldness off me), I come wonder wetin she fit offer me apart from her toto, just this morning Babe dey yarn me say she dey Hungry with beta boldness oh, I come tell am make she find something chop she say make I send am money I off, I told her if she recalled what she told me yesterday she said yes, then I replied her that she needs a good paying Job and not a Husband. babe provoke still dey ask me wetin I mean

Ladies should be comfortable to a point before thinking marriage as e get wetin hunger fit do you, you go marry to quench hunger and not marry out of love.

E choke