Judd007:
She’s too young for distance marriage, you sef na just 30, to risky, you risked your marriage, and you just got burnt, sorry though.

If OP equally too young for distance marriage since he also cheated on his wife?

chazon:
Am in my 30’s, My wife and I have been living in separate locations about 4yrs now. With intermittent visits 3-4months intervals.
Few days back wen she visited, I exchanged one of my new fones with her so while I was checking out the fone so I could delete some stuff and familiarize with the fone(her previous fone ,now mine)I casually stumbled into her FB & WhatsApp and saw sex chats with different men including her ex. This will be first ever I would be checking her SM, calls, SMS or whatsoever.
When I confronted her with these evidences, she rather than apologize to me, began guilt tripping me with how she’s been ignoring my own philandering (but no evidence, she’s just basing them on speculations).
She dragged the fone in a bid to snatch it from me at the Mall in public.
I told her point blank how disappointed & angry I am and am separating from her.
I arranged for for logistics to take her to our house in the town she stays.
She’s called my dad. I have no idea what she’s told them, but I got evidences.
We do not yet have a child together.

Did I overreact??
How do I deal with this situation
Mature advices will be appreciated from experienced people

He that is without a sin should cast a stone. If you have not cheated before then you are right but if you dey cheat, the word of God cannot be broken. To the froward I will be to the upright I will be.

chazon:
Am in my 30’s, My wife and I have been living in separate locations about 4yrs now. With intermittent visits 3-4months intervals.
Few days back wen she visited, I exchanged one of my new fones with her so while I was checking out the fone so I could delete some stuff and familiarize with the fone(her previous fone ,now mine)I casually stumbled into her FB & WhatsApp and saw sex chats with different men including her ex. This will be first ever I would be checking her SM, calls, SMS or whatsoever.
When I confronted her with these evidences, she rather than apologize to me, began guilt tripping me with how she’s been ignoring my own philandering (but no evidence, she’s just basing them on speculations).
She dragged the fone in a bid to snatch it from me at the Mall in public.
I told her point blank how disappointed & angry I am and am separating from her.
I arranged for for logistics to take her to our house in the town she stays.
She’s called my dad. I have no idea what she’s told them, but I got evidences.
We do not yet have a child together.

Did I overreact??
How do I deal with this situation
Mature advices will be appreciated from experienced people

If you don't have a child yet then you are blessed. If I have not gotten kid's I would have left the marriage my wife is a distraction to me. Take a bow. Come to think of it, how can you be living apart as new couples?

Kobojunkie:
1. OP, have you equally been cheating on your wife? The reason I ask is because we all know marriages loaded sort of like yours are typically not without the man playing his own side games.

2. Please consider marriage counseling at this time so you both can find a way forward for yourselves.

Does men hate their wife when the men are cheating?
The answer is no

PEACE2023:
■ Does men hate their wife when the men are cheating? The answer is no

Ofcourse, men who cheat love their wives so much that is why they even go as far as
▢ infecting said wives with STDs,
▢ calling them names to shame and humiliate them,
▢ depriving said wives of opportunities for growth,
▢ while some men even go as far as to abandon wives for the sake of their side-chicks.

Love is definitely in the air when men cheat on their wives.

woginid967:


You did this very late...

Dont ever trust a woman whose phone you have not haccked

Spy on her phone, sms, calls, SM... Before and after marriage if you want peace.

Now for the men... Send their evidences to bloggers while protecting your wife's identity. And you will be fine.

They will think she leaked it, she will be shamed and become remorseful.

Find the men's wives or church members and send the proofs. Simple.

Do the same to her parents and siblings and your parents too.

Return her dowry.


You're forever free.

You will never be suspected because it is the online blog you would be sharing.

God bless

Bros I'm facing similar situation i just don't know how to go about this. I need evidence to nail her cause she seems to smart making the cheating invisible. How do i tap her phone to monitor her WhatsApp and other social media activities. I'm scared cause I don't want to rusk the new trend of raising another man's children ad mine. Pls my guy help out. My contact is here 08030836113 pls if u call me will call u back. Thanks 🙏

blaise26abj:


What kind of stupid life is that ? Hacking and monitoring your wife’s phone ? Really ? Like someone that has nothing better to worry about . I will never stress about a grown up decisions . For a child or teen ? Very much . A woman that will cheat will cheat and you will catch her . It’s just a function of time . Why stress about the revelation when you know it will come if she is cheating . Better to find out like the poster out of the blues than live a life of constant suspicion .

Your leaking mouth.

I had to learn these things when i saw a Pastor get HIV AIDS from his promiscuous wife.

All in the name of finding out later

chazon:
Am in my 30’s, My wife and I have been living in separate locations about 4yrs now. With intermittent visits 3-4months intervals.
Few days back wen she visited, I exchanged one of my new fones with her so while I was checking out the fone so I could delete some stuff and familiarize with the fone(her previous fone ,now mine)I casually stumbled into her FB & WhatsApp and saw sex chats with different men including her ex. This will be first ever I would be checking her SM, calls, SMS or whatsoever.
When I confronted her with these evidences, she rather than apologize to me, began guilt tripping me with how she’s been ignoring my own philandering (but no evidence, she’s just basing them on speculations).
She dragged the fone in a bid to snatch it from me at the Mall in public.
I told her point blank how disappointed & angry I am and am separating from her.
I arranged for for logistics to take her to our house in the town she stays.
She’s called my dad. I have no idea what she’s told them, but I got evidences.
We do not yet have a child together.

Did I overreact??
How do I deal with this situation
Mature advices will be appreciated from experienced people

Unfortunately, most of our wives cheat emotionally... Few may get physical. Just Ignore bro

Learn to live with it

Still wondering the kind of advice you really want people to give you here.

According to you, you got evidence that your wife is cheating with her ex and other men, and you are here asking for what to do.

I have some suggestions for you

1. Buy her a gift.
2. Buy her a car if she doesn't have one or change the one she has.

Continue marrying her, when she kill you, let your ghost send invitation to nairaland for your burial, we will come.

Ozuo!

U are even coming here to ask after all these evidence??
Kai, 21 century men.

woginid967:


Your leaking mouth.

I had to learn these things when i saw a Pastor get HIV AIDS from his promiscuous wife.

All in the name of finding out later

Didn’t insult you though . Apologies if you feel I did .
There was NOTHING the pastor could have done to prevent it ….except not marrying her . You think you can find out if a woman is cheating on you if she knows you are actively looking for it ? I have listened to women who cheat and I can tell you that the length they go to hide it will shock you . Some even fly out of their states to Bleep and return the same day without the husband knowing nada . They cover their tracks mightily well because they know the society will not take kindly to them being found out .

May we not marry who will send us to an early grave

Here is advice.

1. Give your wife a second chance.

2. Don't give her distance again for minor reasons.

3. Give her sex as much as she need.

4. Bring the best in her.

5. Love her as if it was your first date

6. If she cheat after all these, get another wife,else, enjoy your marriage.

TheWinterBird:
I've just looked at your profile and in one of your other threads, you went to a club and gave another woman (who asked to "hangout" with you on another day) your phone number, so you're in no position to talk about your wife cheating because you're a cheater yourself. Don't bother deleting the thread/post, as I've already screenshot it.

https://www.nairaland.com/7386252/women-naturally-born-entitlement-mentality

Oga na DSS you be?

I'm sorry to hear about the difficult situation you're facing in your marriage. It appears that there's a lack of communication and trust in your relationship, which are fundamental for a healthy partnership. Your reaction to discovering your wife's messages is understandable, as trust has been broken. It's important to stay calm and seek a resolution that is acceptable to both parties in such situations.

Consider seeking professional help, like couple's therapy. A neutral third party can assist in improving communication between you two and addressing underlying issues. It's also crucial to openly and honestly discuss your feelings and needs.

If both of you feel that the relationship is irreparable, contemplating separation might be necessary. In such a case, it's important to handle everything respectfully and fairly, especially if family members are involved.

Ultimately, you need to make a decision that's best for you. It's a very personal choice, and only you can know what's best for your future. Consider all aspects of your relationship and your own well-being in your decision-making process.

TheWinterBird:
I've just looked at your profile and in one of your other threads, you went to a club and gave another woman (who asked to "hangout" with you on another day) your phone number, so you're in no position to talk about your wife cheating because you're a cheater yourself. Don't bother deleting the thread/post, as I've already screenshot it.

https://www.nairaland.com/7386252/women-naturally-born-entitlement-mentality

pls how can one delete a thread or post??

🤣🤣

Fountainofyouth:
I like the fact that you stylishly didn't admit that you cheated, only that there's no evidence, swear with amadioha say you no cheat

You can divorce, your choice, but you can also forgive her since you know you also cheated on her.

PEACE2023:

Does men hate their wife when the men are cheating?
The answer is no

Your wife must be suffering in your hands.
You are cheating and you are proud of it