Girl wey you no even sleep with na hom you de claim girlfriend,, wait till Dem wreck your future for you

GodPrince:
I greet you all. My people pls help me address this properly. There's this babe I met at an Agricultural programme in 2023 last year we exchanged contacts and started communicating but it was a rare communication initially we just talked only about our agric programmes and some times we just chat a little after I buy data from her, she's a graphic designer and data vendor, she doesn't even disturb me for money. fast forward to when she claimed to be single so I proposed a love affair she told me she's single mom and everything that happened, I understood her n felt for her but I really love this girl especially her eye color. she accepted we started dating, she has been so nice sometimes she gave me data I didn't ask for, she even proposed to give me some money to put in my business but I stylishly rejected it because I know how women are, she's really been so nice and loving but later on she got too confident that maybe I love her too much so she kind of snub me and act somehow sometimes, I actually love this female and intend to marry her because we have alot in common in respect to life interests and careers. I feel this inner peace I never felt before but I just dislike her being single mom, she has promised me sex several times but I just give her excuse for us not to have sex because if I don't marry her later on she will say I used and dumped her and that's not my intention for her, my intention is beyond just sex so I won't do it with her since I don't know if I can marry her. lately we were chatting I asked her if she still has feelings for her ex and she admitted to me that recently she felt something for him because the guy recently started caring for her. So I was like ok, since then I limited the conversations and she too kept ignoring me also, 2 times she misbehaved b4 but she used emotional blackmail to get me back and my conscience starts judging me not to leave her because I know honestly her type is rare these days, but till now about 4 days we have not communicated and I already moved on. I remember I read somebody's comment on nairaland that said "single mother na person wife". So like I've moved on and I don't intend to continue no matter the emotional blackmail she may put up later, have I taken the right step by moving on? or I should try to mend things if the female reaches out again? Is it okay to marry a single mom? What are the possible dangers?

run o!
No take am play.

Otherwise na you she go use and dump.

With what I know today, I would probably marry a single mum only if
1. She is working (skilled self employed or government)
2. Her kpekus is still tight and neat (no tear or natural earrings)
3. The child is a girl

Reason is, when you marry and the first baby comes, finding help is very risky these days, so why not use someone already related in the family - my stepdaughter.
Even if the real father comes later, it doesn't matter because even if I had pick a house help from anywhere and train, she will still go back to her parents but at least, she was helpful while with me

GodPrince:
I greet you all. My people pls help me address this properly. There's this babe I met at an Agricultural programme in 2023 last year we exchanged contacts and started communicating but it was a rare communication initially we just talked only about our agric programmes and some times we just chat a little after I buy data from her, she's a graphic designer and data vendor, she doesn't even disturb me for money. fast forward to when she claimed to be single so I proposed a love affair she told me she's single mom and everything that happened, I understood her n felt for her but I really love this girl especially her eye color. she accepted we started dating, she has been so nice sometimes she gave me data I didn't ask for, she even proposed to give me some money to put in my business but I stylishly rejected it because I know how women are, she's really been so nice and loving but later on she got too confident that maybe I love her too much so she kind of snub me and act somehow sometimes, I actually love this female and intend to marry her because we have alot in common in respect to life interests and careers. I feel this inner peace I never felt before but I just dislike her being single mom, she has promised me sex several times but I just give her excuse for us not to have sex because if I don't marry her later on she will say I used and dumped her and that's not my intention for her, my intention is beyond just sex so I won't do it with her since I don't know if I can marry her. lately we were chatting I asked her if she still has feelings for her ex and she admitted to me that recently she felt something for him because the guy recently started caring for her. So I was like ok, since then I limited the conversations and she too kept ignoring me also, 2 times she misbehaved b4 but she used emotional blackmail to get me back and my conscience starts judging me not to leave her because I know honestly her type is rare these days, but till now about 4 days we have not communicated and I already moved on. I remember I read somebody's comment on nairaland that said "single mother na person wife". So like I've moved on and I don't intend to continue no matter the emotional blackmail she may put up later, have I taken the right step by moving on? or I should try to mend things if the female reaches out again? Is it okay to marry a single mom? What are the possible dangers?

Just listen to this mumu.
Single mother wants to use you as spare tyre. Your life don finish.

advanceDNA:


Guy Marry her.....if all goes well...all praise to God....If it goes bad...u will come and educate nairaland ..

But the standard issues most face are:

Wahala of ex: strafing ur wife if she's not over him...Once the ex start to provide more for ur wife......guy..ur home is under threat...

Double authority: "My daddy said", ...my daddy doesn't want me to do this or that" .

If u are rich: u shouldn't have issues with caring for an extra kid that's not urs.......if not, a time will come u will choose ur own kid when u cant afford a major expense for both.wahala go start

Discipline: .never forget...her child is not urs... How u will slap ur own kid is not how u will slap her kid....the outcome will never be the same.

Female children: give urself brain...u will always be viewed as a potential rapist...

Over all..u have more work to do ..because u gats make her happy, make her kid happy, keep the ex in check ....keep her second inlaws in check...... but u go dey alright naaa..shebi u be strong man...??

Omo. You na person way understand people. On point bro. 💯 facts

Since you asked, I'm going 2 give the cold hard facts to you comprehensively.

Contrary to popular media-myth I have yet to meet a single mom who was career driven, carefree, balanced, happy; doing it all type gal as often portrayed in most media outlets. The reality I have seen over the years is usually a stressed out, overworked, debt stricken woman who really had no idea children cost so much in time, effort and money. Their careers are on hold as they need to balance their child with sickness, school activities etc versus moving up whatever career ladder they are on. Most single moms are raising their children with help of an extended family member (usually their mom), a bevy of friends and other single moms they find in support groups. It is usually not a pretty picture at all.

Somewhere along the way, usually quite quickly they come up with the idea that they need a "partner" to help them in their new enterprise of having a child and the sooner they can get one the better. Realizing they have a bit of a disadvantage with having a child and being in the dating scene they resort to several well known strategies to get a partner.

One trait that seems to come to the forefront with most men who are dating single moms is just how wonderful a woman they really are. Most men cannot for the life of them figure out why another man would abandon a woman like her. It has been stated that single moms are more caring, compassionate, great lovers, excellent cooks, laugh at all your jokes etc they seem to be ideal mates.

No matter what you see as a man there is something else going on do not forget that. Her plan is to eventually get a partner one way or another. You are the prize and she is going to earn it.

Here is a short list of problems you may encounter but not limited to these

1. Being a "partner" means you get to pay for half- if not more: I have seen men putting money away for college for a kid that´s not his. Buying ridiculous amounts of brand name clothes, expensive homes etc all in an effort to be in a so-called "family".

2. The Family you just got into is by invitation only: In being a step- parent you are not the basic unit. The mother and child together are the basic unit. No matter what is said or mentioned before marriage, you will never come before her child. You will always be in a family and relationship where you come second, maybe third.

3. No matter what you think her ex is going to be there forever: In just about every case the child´s father does not seem to be in the picture during the dating and courtship stage but seems to suddenly show up after. Just about every time you will be dragged into the endless bickering and fights they have and you will not be liked by him "its only natural remember"

4. Her kid will most likely not like you very much. Let´s face it you´re sleeping with their mom and most of the time the child will see you as a roadblock to his parents getting back together. Most likely the mom has made you the giver of discipline in the relationship, being the man and all which results in the kid hating you.

5. All that time you had together with your new love will end after marriage. The number one job of a single mom is simply to be a mom. She is not a party girl, hiker, camper, biker, clubber etc. Just be prepared for a frontal assault on your time and money after marriage. You will find your weekdays taken up with homework, PTA meetings, suppers at home, and early bed times. Weekends will be the time for the child´s extra-curricular activities and other activities

6. You will wonder what happened to all your money. Most men involved with a single mom report that their money seems to dry up. Children are expensive and expensive like most men have no idea. Between school supplies, clothing, vast amounts of food, babysitters if you ever want to go out, medications, fees, sports, supplies, toys and such; well, there will be little left.

7. You will never really be accepted. I have observed time and time again the heartbreak of a step parent as the child gets older. After putting them through school, providing a place to live, food, getting the child all kinds of gifts and honestly really caring about the child. The time comes for a grad or a wedding, the child invites mom and dad to the party; and thanks them for all their love and work. Usually there is not even an acknowledgment of effort.

8. You will have no time for errors. A lot of single men get involved with the single mom and her kids when the child is a bit older. Being inexperienced with children becomes a huge burden as the single man has no time to learn parenting skills; and mistakes are not readily forgiven nor forgotten when a kid is 4 compared to 14.

9. You may think it ends, but it never does. I know many men whose single mom wife promised them a completely different life after junior turned 18 or so. At the beginning of the relationship it looked like just a few years and then total privacy and freedom. but it never does.

10. You will have nothing to show for it. In the end when most men have their own children the work and effort is well worth it. The men did their best and raised a family, continued a line, get grandchildren etc. As a step-parent you have contributed as much but you have nothing. Nobody carries on your name and most men realize they are not even ever thanked for their sacrifice.

11. The legalities can be your shipwreck. There have been numerous cases where a man has divorced or left a single mom and then found himself liable financially for her child. Although not the father he will be responsible for child payments, extra fees and most certainly university far after they are 18 check the laws out, it´s a raw deal. Couple that with some alimony and child abuse claims you get the whole effect of being a divorced and homeless dad with not one child of your own.

12. Untimely death most time is around the corner, the mental, financial & physical stress that this arrangement will bring to you will kill you early, you can become suicidal, she, the ex or the child can set you up to be killed for stupid reasons. Don´t involve yourself with these women under any circumstances. It can be in many ways, the death of a man

In the end women have asked for their freedom to make their own choices now for decades. I would advise all single men to let single moms make their choice of having a child by themselves and then live with it. .

labake1:
Justice for single mothers

OP is brainwashed by the society, not all single parents are bad. Some are just unlucky with men

I will only marry dem as 2nd wife

EreluRoz:
Some single moms are actually very good, they were just unfortunate with an unstable and irresponsible man in their life. Stop demonizing them

Hehehehehehe.


This one will not allow her son to marry a single mom fah.


Many single mons no fit allow their son to marry single mom. I no understand am.

Forget the relationship.
The mistake you made though was not fvcking her. You can still do that sha.
Just fvck and dump her. You can even ask her for some money too.

Savedday2:
They are pretentiously evil. They can kill you in your sleep.

They are only loyal to their child and sometimes the baby daddy.

Don't be deceived!

I want to understand something.



Are you saying that having a child out of wedlock makes them pretentiously evil?

Single mothers are caring,good and matured but the only problem they have is their ex.

But in all,everything in life has consequence.

Just like this last election...so is the single mother wahala.

Tallesty1:
Hehehehehehe.


This one will not allow her son to marry a single mom fah.


Many single mons no fit allow their son to marry single mom. I no understand am.

Stop stigmatizing single moms, irresponsible men make them single mom. Let's talk about single dad for once

EreluRoz:
Stop stigmatizing single moms, irresponsible men make them single mom. Let's talk about single dad for once

And it takes an irresponsible lady to sleep with irresponsible men! So you see, single moms are not innocent.

Jman06:
And it takes an irresponsible lady to sleep with irresponsible men! So you see, single moms are not innocent.

And single dads too

EreluRoz:
And single dads too

Women are the gatekeepers of sex. They determine if sex would happen or not and they usually give sex to the guys they like. So, that is why they're mostly blamed for the consequences of premarital sex.

Jman06:
Women are the gatekeepers of sex. They determine if sex would happen or not and they usually give sex to the guys they like. So, that is why they're mostly blamed for the consequences of premarital sex.

They give it to guys they like Yes but these guys are mostly not with genuine intentions which makes them end up single mothers

EreluRoz:
And single dads too

Hey hey pleaseeeee
I'm a single dad and I'm responsible!!!😎😎😎😎😎😎

EreluRoz:
They give it to guys they like Yes but these guys are mostly not with genuine intentions which makes them end up single mothers

Giving it to the guys they like means that it is their desire to have sex, so the guy's intention is immaterial. In fact, guys should even start charging money for meeting up the bodily cravings of such ladies.


Except in the event of rape, I believe that guys should not be held responsible for pregnancies resulting from consensual sex with ladies.

Jman06:
Giving it to the guys they like means that it is their desire to have sex, so the guy's intention is immaterial. In fact, guys should even start charging money for meeting up the bodily cravings of such ladies.


Except in the event of rape, I believe that guys should not be held responsible for pregnancies resulting from consensual sex with ladies.

What a response

See the mindset of a potential baby daddy

drimzsmoke:



Hey hey pleaseeeee
I'm a single dad and I'm responsible!!!😎😎😎😎😎😎

Is that your baby? She's so cute . Where's her mom?

EreluRoz:
Is that your baby? She's so cute . Where's her mom?

Yes, thank you

She ran away because I'm a wicked soul!!!!

EreluRoz:
What a response

See the mindset of a potential baby daddy

But that's the truth nau.

drimzsmoke:




Yes, thank you

She ran away because I'm a wicked soul!!!!

When you were being unnecessary wicked, did you consider your baby?

EreluRoz:
When you were being unnecessary wicked, did you consider your baby?

I no know why some people like to bring wahala for themselves, op, you wont be able to handle the stress , just wait until you have sex then you will see her true color. If she is so nice as you claimed, why the baby daddy no marry her after all these years?

Newton2024:
What is the something that she felt for him? This is a red flag unless you don't care if your wife has two husbands.

My cousin have a baby mama, he used to tell me anytime he feels Hot he just starts acting caring toward his baby mama, the girl will just fall and he will sleep with her, and this his baby mama is in a very serious relationship o.

I don't believe single mothers stories

balaclava:
7. You will never really be accepted. I have observed time and time again the heartbreak of a step parent as the child gets older. After putting them through school, providing a place to live, food, getting the child all kinds of gifts and honestly really caring about the child. The time comes for a grad or a wedding, the child invites mom and dad to the party; and thanks them for all their love and work. Usually there is not even an acknowledgment of effort.

8. You will have no time for errors. A lot of single men get involved with the single mom and her kids when the child is a bit older. Being inexperienced with children becomes a huge burden as the single man has no time to learn parenting skills; and mistakes are not readily forgiven nor forgotten when a kid is 4 compared to 14.

9. You may think it ends, but it never does. I know many men whose single mom wife promised them a completely different life after junior turned 18 or so. At the beginning of the relationship it looked like just a few years and then total privacy and freedom. but it never does.

10. You will have nothing to show for it. In the end when most men have their own children the work and effort is well worth it. The men did their best and raised a family, continued a line, get grandchildren etc. As a step-parent you have contributed as much but you have nothing. Nobody carries on your name and most men realize they are not even ever thanked for their sacrifice.

11. The legalities can be your shipwreck. There have been numerous cases where a man has divorced or left a single mom and then found himself liable financially for her child. Although not the father he will be responsible for child payments, extra fees and most certainly university far after they are 18 check the laws out, it´s a raw deal. Couple that with some alimony and child abuse claims you get the whole effect of being a divorced and homeless dad with not one child of your own.

12. Untimely death most time is around the corner, the mental, financial & physical stress that this arrangement will bring to you will kill you early, you can become suicidal, she, the ex or the child can set you up to be killed for stupid reasons. Don´t involve yourself with these women under any circumstances. It can be in many ways, the death of a man

In the end women have asked for their freedom to make their own choices now for decades. I would advise all single men to let single moms make their choice of having a child by themselves and then live with it. .

Thanks alot bro. I appreciate, I'm fully convinced by all you stated. My dad had raised 2 children from one of his wives he raised them from babies to successful adults before and after my dad's demise the scumbaggs never showed any appreciation,There are other better ones out there that fits me. Thank God I didn't even touch her. I'm completely cutting the b1tch off. Thanks alot.