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When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. - Romance - Nairaland

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When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Hamachi(f): 9:07pm On Feb 05
When a woman wants to teach you a lesson, even Satan sits down to take notes. My neighbor was a big drunk. His wife used to pick him up in bars and in trenches. Her family friends advised her to leave him but she was hopeful that she'll find a solution.

One Saturday she went to pick him again, he was completely drunk. Instead of taking him home, she headed straight to the mortuary. She negotiated with the mortuary attendants to make him lie with the corpses and when he wakes up they teach him a lesson. She then went back home.

When he woke up, he started screaming when he found himself sleeping in the middle of dead bodies. He started screaming and calling for help pleading that he's not dead. The mortuary attendants came laughing and told him that they are used to corpses being brought to the morgue and start practicing witchcraft. They told him to lie down and that he was dead and whatever he was seeing was not in real life but in the other end of living dead.

He continued screaming and the morgue attendants came with an axe and hammer and told him that stubborn corpses are beaten and hacked until they become cooperative. He was told to lie and wait for his postmortem later that day since his cause of death hadn't been established.

He stayed there frightened in the middle of corpses the whole of that day and Sunday night. On Monday morning they released him and told him to go home, say bye bye to his family and then come back to the morgue for preservation since he was now a mere spirit.

He ran home on foot, straight to the mirror to check if he was seeing himself. His wife pretended not to see him which made him even more worried. He went to the bathroom took a shower, dressed up and carried a Bible. That's when his wife told him that it was a Monday morning and not Sunday.

Several months later he's yet to reveal what happened to him and where he was the 2 nights he wasn't at home. He stopped taking alcohol completely, not even soda, just milk and water. He goes to church religiously.
The power of a woman.πŸ€—πŸ€“βœ…πŸ‘‹πŸ™
Trust the week would be refreshing πŸ€—

23 Likes 2 Shares

Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Figger(m): 9:43pm On Feb 05
[quote author=Hamachi post=128305987][/quote] nice story, food don done for content creators
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by tommy589(m): 10:03pm On Feb 05
[quote author=Hamachi post=128305987][/quote]

It's an old joke but I like the way you retell it

7 Likes

Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Unseen(m): 10:42pm On Feb 05
If the man had died of High BP nko? This is an extreme measure biko.

2 Likes

Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Illegal1(m): 10:59pm On Feb 05
omoh.........dis 1 na bye force repentance.
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Hamachi(f): 7:01am On Feb 06
undecided
Unseen:
If the man had died of High BP nko? This is an extreme measure biko.
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by talk2hb1(m): 7:11am On Feb 06
Hamachi:


Sweet Story!
πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘

1 Like

Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Astra101: 10:11am On Feb 06
cheesy
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by CandidAdmin(m): 10:41am On Feb 06
Wow! Na true talk ooo.
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Sirhush(m): 11:35am On Feb 06
Fear woman cheesy
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Blackfire(m): 11:53am On Feb 06
grin

Exactly what APC buhari tinubu have been doing to us
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by CrazyBen(m): 12:21pm On Feb 06
Candidlady e be like you get problem
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by pansophist(m): 3:53pm On Feb 06
In other words, being a drunk (lack of self-leadership) is the reason why the woman can teach him a lesson.

Or like Samson who Delilah taught a lesson because he can't just shut up about the source of his power?

Or like that super TV CEO that Chioma killed in a hotel because he can't be faithful to his wife?

Or during elections or endsars when the political class will use unscrupulous Nigerians to cause problems that will affect the rest?

You see where I'm going with this right? For others to defeat you, they will use the demon living inside you to accomplish their goal.

Like when Jesus finished fasting and the devil came to tempt his ego. The devil asked Jesus to bow down before him, that he will give him the World. Jesus told him to fork off.

If you properly develop yourself, the enemy will see no vice living inside you to recruit. Once a man has successfully defeated himself, then he has defeated the world.

Honor and virtue (a by-product of self-development) are the most potent weapons against the attacks your visible and invincible enemies will throw.

If one does not develop himself, he might not even be able to pay the price of not developing himself because in many cases, it's death.

It's easier to rule a city than to rule yourself - Proverbs 16.32.

17 Likes 7 Shares

Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by EmperorCaesar(m): 4:11pm On Feb 06
And u think this trait is something u should brag about

Na why dem say una get chicken brain be this

How does a gender pride themselves in inhumanity??

Spits on the forehead of every man that has decided to marry later in life
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by theredaddy: 5:46pm On Feb 06
pansophist:
In order words, being a drunk (lack of self-leadership) is the reason why the woman can teach him a lesson?

Or like Samson who Delilah taught a lesson because he can't just shut up about the source of his power?

Or like that super TV CEO that Chioma killed in a hotel because he can't be faithful to his wife?

Or during elections or endsars when the political class will use unscrupulous Nigerians to cause problems that will affect the rest?

You see where I'm going with this right? For others to defeat you, they will use the demon living inside you to accomplish their goal.

Like when Jesus finished fasting and devil came to tempt his ego. The devil asked Jesus to bow down before him, that he will give him the World. Jesus told him to fork off.

If you properly develop yourself, the enemy will see no vice living inside you to recruit. Once a man have successfully defeated himself, then he has defeated the world.

Honour and virtue (a by-product of self-development) is the most potent weapon against the attacks of your visible and invincible enemies will throw.

If one does not develop himself, he might not even be able to pay the price of not developing himself because in many cases, it's death.

It's easier to rule a city, than to rule yourself - Proverbs 16.32.




Bro i like your write ups, there something i would like to ask ... out of curiosity

Between someone stranded and someone that does not know where he is going at the bus stop... is there any difference ?
if at all there is a difference, from a preview how can you differentiate these two
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Dzzzz: 6:22pm On Feb 06
My babe Na satan PA but I love her well cause she’s beauty and brains..But if she wan show me pepper eh even demons and angels dey plead on my behalf,sometines I go just feel like to give her upper cut and scissors kick but home training no go allow me.
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by pansophist(m): 7:02pm On Feb 06
theredaddy:





Bro i like your write ups, there something i would like to ask ... out of curiosity

Between someone stranded and someone that does not know where he is going at the bus stop... is there any difference ?
if at all there is a difference, from a preview how can you differentiate these two


Being stranded is knowing where you want to go but lacking in the means. Not knowing where you're going is self-explanatory. It's a lack of direction.

So the stranded person can reach their destination with a means, but the direction less person even with a means, will still be lost.

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by theredaddy: 7:55pm On Feb 06
pansophist:


Being stranded is knowing where you want to go but lacking in the means. Not knowing where you're going is self-explanatory. It's a lack of direction.

So the stranded person can reach their destination with a means, but the direction less person even with a means, will still be lost.


Yeah ! but can you please use "PERCEPTION" here, without being told can you tell who is "stranded" from someone who doesnt know where he/she is going just studying them

2 Likes

Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by lavylilly: 8:41am On Feb 07
wink
pansophist:
In other words, being a drunk (lack of self-leadership) is the reason why the woman can teach him a lesson.

Or like Samson who Delilah taught a lesson because he can't just shut up about the source of his power?

Or like that super TV CEO that Chioma killed in a hotel because he can't be faithful to his wife?

Or during elections or endsars when the political class will use unscrupulous Nigerians to cause problems that will affect the rest?

You see where I'm going with this right? For others to defeat you, they will use the demon living inside you to accomplish their goal.

Like when Jesus finished fasting and the devil came to tempt his ego. The devil asked Jesus to bow down before him, that he will give him the World. Jesus told him to fork off.

If you properly develop yourself, the enemy will see no vice living inside you to recruit. Once a man has successfully defeated himself, then he has defeated the world.

Honor and virtue (a by-product of self-development) are the most potent weapons against the attacks your visible and invincible enemies will throw.

If one does not develop himself, he might not even be able to pay the price of not developing himself because in many cases, it's death.

It's easier to rule a city than to rule yourself - Proverbs 16.32.
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by lavylilly: 8:42am On Feb 07
lipsrsealed
EmperorCaesar:
And u think this trait is something u should brag about

Na why dem say una get chicken brain be this

How does a gender pride themselves in inhumanity??

Spits on the forehead of every man that has decided to marry later in life
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by drimzsmoke(m): 9:05am On Feb 07
[quote author=Hamachi post=128305987][/quote]


🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣

1 Like

Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by drimzsmoke(m): 9:06am On Feb 07
Unseen:
If the man had died of High BP nko? This is an extreme measure biko.

O n pe!!!🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by MumEmdy(f): 5:04pm On Feb 07
grin grin grin
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Hamachi(f): 5:27pm On Feb 07
drimzsmoke:



🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣🀣
Atleast I made you laugh.
Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Vijuchoco(f): 5:31pm On Feb 07
Interesting! This story is somehow though cheesy

1 Like

Re: When A Woman Wants To Teach You A Lesson, Even Satan Sits Down To Take Notes. by Hamachi(f): 7:34pm On Mar 29
wink
Vijuchoco:
Interesting! This story is somehow though cheesy

(1) (Reply)

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