almondjoy:

Have you seen the way most Nigerian women look in parties over here beside their husbands? You will wonder if they are wives to the men or mothers of the men. Most of them look so tired and so beat down--with some serious stress pimples on the face and chest. Only the ones that have at least a 20 year gap between them and you can tell who is older. I say it is terrible.


The ones on Nigeria? Forget those. Spend too much time keeping vigil--cannot even comb their hair out straight.

LMAO at highlighted! Almondjoy, you no go kill persin with laughter So true girl, so true. I completely agree.

nwando:

Take off the wig and heavy duty pancake on her face and you'll them see the real Al Gore

@Nwando,
then the guy should be thrown out.
and u are sooooooo funny, what?

janami:

i ve bin going tru this thread and laffin. kpof kpof, jerry springer hahaha
this thing swings both ways, see some guys just plain think a wife is a slave, but some are willing, really willing to help out but most times women abuse this. they tend to start disrespecting the guy.

exactly dearie.

janami:

i ve bin going tru this thread and laffin. kpof kpof, jerry springer hahaha
this thing swings both ways, see some guys just plain think a wife is a slave, but some are willing, really willing to help out but most times women abuse this. they tend to start disrespecting the guy.

That is what a long history of "sufferhead" causes.  If any woman is so used to being "unappreciated or pamperless", there is a long term simmering feeling of "pepper bodi syndrome". 

Even if the man starts to say goodmorning honey one day out of the blues the only thing in the woman's mind is "useless man"! Na so so cuss. "Ye ye man--you no go die better"!!! Pesin dey see something for Nigeria oh!

The woman can never appreciate anything from the guy she is with since the point of no return sufferhead status has been climbed.  Nothing the man would do can make a difference.  So guys start early and be sensitive to your girlfriends and wives needs so you do not end up with a perpertual bitch-bat!--PBB    You cannot turn back the hands of the clock or time since you guys are in "injury time" phase of your relationship!

Make una avoid pepper bodi syndrome-----PBS----oh!

almondjoy:

That is what a long history of "sufferhead" causes. If any woman is so used to being "unappreciated or pamperless", there is a long term simmering feeling of "pepper bodi syndrome".

Even if the man starts to say goodmorning honey one day out of the blues the only thing in the woman's mind is "useless man"!

The woman can never appreciate anything from the guy she is with since the point of no return sufferhead status has been climbed. Nothing the man would do can make a difference. So guys start early and be sensitive to your girlfriends and wives needs so you do not end up with a perpertual bitch-bat!--PBB You cannot turn back the hands of the clock or time since you guys are in "injury time" phase of your relationship!

Make una avoid pepper bodi syndrome-----PBS----oh!

PBS

pepper bodi synWHAT!

@ d- thing
gat to say you gat a loud mouth am sure you'll be among these new generation women always claiming female rights who'll always end up as old mean spinsters "hey no be prayer" i understand what u saying but things are not always what they seem imagine you entering your married bro's house and seeing him cooking in the kitchen while the wife watches TV u go shout bloody murder cause that's our tradition even those so called american men also won't do that 4 any lady "except u give am luv portion .
don't generalise that's what am tryin 2 say

Krazied, Lets be honest , the  American male, be he White or Black,  seeing a Nigerian woman struggling with  all the bags while her Nigerian husband walks empty handed, would see it the same way as the original poster. Rightly or wrongly the usual complaint that Americans/British/ Carribeans have about Nigerian men is that they feel they expect their women to be slaves. Thats not my opinion of Nigerian men in general . But truthfully, thats how many non Nigerians see you.

londoner:

Krazied, Lets be honest , the  American male, be he White or Black,  seeing a Nigerian woman struggling with  all the bags while her Nigerian husband walks empty handed, would see it the same way as the original poster. Rightly or wrongly the usual complaint that Americans/British/ Carribeans have about Nigerian men is that they feel they expect their women to be slaves. Thats not my opinion of Nigerian men in general . But truthfully, thats how many non Nigerians see you.

I can't believe you actually responded to "d- thing".  You are always so civilized as usual. Goodluck.

Almondjoy, lol. I have my moments. I tell you, this site has been an education in itself.

krazied:

@ d- thing
got to say you gat a loud mouth am sure you'll be among these new generation women always claiming female rights who'll always end up as old mean spinsters "hey no be prayer" i understand what u saying but things are not always what they seem imagine you entering your married bro's house and seeing him cooking in the kitchen while the wife watches TV u go shout bloody murder cause that's our tradition even those so called american men also won't do that 4 any lady "except u give am love portion .
don't generalise that's what am tryin 2 say

I understand what you are trying to say but its quite funny,nigerian guys want to get married and want to spice up their marriage,when we talk about spicing up marriage,all ya talk about is the woman's dressing,body and stuffs but here are the little things that will make your wife cherish you and want to keep you all to herself for as long as she can

Though am not saying she should sit down and watch tv while the man cooks,you can help her while she's doing the cooking,once in a while,prepare her meal,carry her stuffs for her (but most of you guys won't even go shopping with her) and see how much she will turn out to appreciate this.

But most ladies can turn this into a routine and or something.

hot chic:

I understand what you are trying to say but its quite funny,nigerian guys want to get married and want to spice up their marriage,when we talk about spicing up marriage,all ya talk about is the woman's dressing,body and stuffs but here are the little things that will make your wife cherish you and want to keep you all to herself for as long as she can

Though am not saying she should sit down and watch tv while the man cooks,you can help her while she's doing the cooking,once in a while,prepare her meal,carry her stuffs for her (but most of you guys won't even go shopping with her) and see how much she will turn out to appreciate this.

But most ladies can turn this into a routine and or something.

i get u gat 2 go

Its in the upbringing. Most men are brought up to lord it over the
women right from home. Girls are taught to respect their brothers
What dear brother says goes etc. He comes home late from lazing around with
friends and the sister (or mother ) must wake up and give him his food - like he has no legs and
hands to get it himself and of course this goes on into marriage. Yes Naija men can
be pretty insensitive - they were brought up that way!!

eezzy I agree 100%

Some of the stuff I have read is not just applicable to some African men but men of all races. But I bet it can't be that bad.

Most African men, Especialy Nigerian men are the real Deal.
Look before you Leap, "Curiousity Kills the Cat, Satisfaction made it Last"

Hmh, I think Nigerian guys are very sensitive and caring, even so much that I haven't got used to all the attention yet.
I think those kind of behaviour things change culturally, Where I come from, guys do nothing for a lady, unless you specifically ask(if not even then). A big girl can take care of herself and so on, So I'm happy about my nigerian men

@Nannu,
nice to hear that ooo!

so u can see its the world over for those that are complaining,

NEW YORK (Reuters Life!) - The more money a married woman earns, the less housework she will do regardless of how much her spouse earns, according to a new study.

A researcher at the University of Massachusetts Amherst found that big paychecks equal less cooking and cleaning in a study of 918 women in double-income families.

Married women who made $40,000 or more a year spent nearly one hour less on housework per day than women who earned $10,000 or less, according to the findings based on data from the National Survey of Families and Households.

"Up to this point, people have thought that the important thing was how much money a woman makes compared to her husband. But the only thing that matters is how much money she earns," Sanjiv Gupta, the study's author, said in an interview.

The study, which is published in the Journal of Marriage and Family, showed that for every $7,500 in annual income a married woman earned, she performed one hour less of housework each week.

Gupta confirmed the link between money, domestic work and spousal relationships in a separate, unpublished study using data on nearly 2,000 couples in the United States and Europe.

The average earnings of American women increased by $6,200 between 1965 and 1995, according to the U.S. Census Bureau. During that time, the amount of time married women spent on weekly chores fell by 14.6 hours.

Since the husband's earnings had no effect on the amount of housework a woman does, the finding suggest women are using their own money to reduce their domestic workloads such as ordering take-out food instead of cooking and hiring cleaners instead of doing it themselves, Gupta said.

"The negative side of it is that it shows just how divided households remain by gender. It emphasized how much housework is the woman's responsibility."

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20071119/lf_nm_life/housework_paycheck_dc

hot chic has said it all.

An average Nigeria man can carry anything to please his loved wife, but traditionally it is not encouraged. Hence to bring it up, the poster should not see it as being lazy or insensitive in the part of 9Ja men. If u want to see real LOVE in play, ask a sincere and resonable Nigeria girl.

All these women should go and marry Ghanaian men or even go marry oyinbo sef.
If na so we bad, make you people go and marry other men. But make you no come back after everything scatter scatter because we sef no want 'ajeku' women.

Blatant:

All these women should go and marry Ghanaian men or even go marry oyinbo sef.
If na so we bad, make you people go and marry other men. But make you no come back after everything scatter scatter because we sef no want 'ajeku' women.

Na fight,take am easy on dem gurls now!

wots the point of contributing when you v already made up your mind that they are either lazy or insensitive,guess you have enough comments neway

Ok, I'm a Malaysian and I am dating a Nigerian guy. I would always prefer to do everything myself without depending on anyone else and when I have him in my life, he basically would want to share every single thing with me. I like it alot but I;m just not use to it and I'm trying to get use to it. So when I go for shopping, he would help me grab a trolley, carry all the stuff which makes me really uncomfortable so I tend to always try grabbing the stuff away from him and things like that and we end up teasing each other all the time and we would laugh about it so I dont see him being bad in any ways. I'm not saying that he is perfect. he has his flauss just like any other people on earth including me but I love him for who he is. Guess I;m just trying to say that in this whole world, you will have good people and bad people and its like a lottery. If you meet up with the good ones, then you are lucky but if you dont, then you always have the choice to decide what turf you want to take next to make your life happier so please dont think negatively about a certain race just because one rotten apple spoils the whole crowd. Hope it helps

gabrywyl:

Ok, I'm a Malaysian and I am dating a Nigerian guy. I would always prefer to do everything myself without depending on anyone else and when I have him in my life, he basically would want to share every single thing with me. I like it alot but I;m just not use to it and I'm trying to get use to it. So when I go for shopping, he would help me grab a trolley, carry all the stuff which makes me really uncomfortable so I tend to always try grabbing the stuff away from him and things like that and we end up teasing each other all the time and we would laugh about it so I don't see him being bad in any ways. I'm not saying that he is perfect. he has his flauss just like any other people on earth including me but I love him for who he is. Guess I;m just trying to say that in this whole world, you will have good people and bad people and its like a lottery. If you meet up with the good ones, then you are lucky but if you don't, then you always have the choice to decide what turf you want to take next to make your life happier so please don't think negatively about a certain race just because one rotten apple spoils the whole crowd. Hope it helps

testimony!!!

It's a pity that up till now people still don't get the point. Well, too bad.

Dear Chiogo, I understand what you mean. If I were in your shoes, I will not be happy myself. In fact, one of my neighbour is the same except its the other way round where the husband would do all the work and the wife sits at home and do nothing and they both are Malaysians. The husband had to pee sitting down because his wife made him do so and she hates it when he lifts the toilet seat up. Things like that which really kills me when I see it and I think it all brings down to different individuals. If the husband still intend to be put down just like that without fighting for his rights, than nobody else could help him. Its the same thing like what you saw. If the wife dont seem to mind carrying all the stuff by herself and she dont want to talk about it to her husband, theres nothing anyone could do about it. So I guess its not about Nigerian men, Its different people from all over the globe. And speaking about Americans, I've seen some American men / women whom are evil and some good ones. Hope it helps?

@bhola u've sed it all .maybe d guy will have willingly helped only if she asked.n since she dint ask d guy "assumed" she dint nid any help.though i dont know whether men still practice d idea of opening d door 4 dia wives 2 enter d car or house n shut it b4 dey enter.i know of some guys who do dat wyle wooing d gal but i dont know weda he has stoped afta wedding.i assume he must av stoped sha because theres notin naija men canot do wen dey r lukin 4 dat vagina but as soon as dey've gotin it. o pari!!!! bak 2 d issue i feel she just dint ask.dats y she dint get any help
@hbrendi u seem 2 be watching 2 much of nollywood lmao una no go kill person 4 dis land wey we dey so

Its all about mindset and upbringing. My man told me straight never to struggle to carry things when he is around.He knows I can do it, he just doesn't want to see me do it.

I know a girl whos Nigerian husband is the same way, he doesn't let her struggle. On the other hand I know a girl whos Nigerian husband WILL NOT get a job, unless its one he wants to do. It depends on the upbringing, but it doesn't help that African culture sometimes does not to give too much space to the women in terms of her own humanity and what she can bear.

I also agree that often a man will do what he is asked to. They dont second guess like us women do.

@Gabry, I wanted to comment to you, but I dont want to open a can of worms unecessarily. I am glad your man is willing to help you out, I'll leave it at that.

@Original TOPIC
Are Naija men
LAZY?-- No.



Are Naija men INSENSITIVE?-- Heck Yes!!

Its funny when we are in the supermarket together he just stands in the drinks section the whole time! I just whizz around. Gotten used to that too.

stay in the USA then